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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....      Home login  
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 springorfall
Joined: 5/17/2015
Msg: 201
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....Page 9 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
I think that it's more a case of, "The older a PERSON the more critical and judmental (they) (are)" And I think this is quite natural really - I mean, as we grow older we have had (hopefully) more life experience and from that will have learned and experienced new and different things and sometimes those things are sad or leave us marked in some way. It's what we decide to do with this learned/experienced knowledge, that's the crux, I think. Do we allow all that life-brilliance to cause us to be arrogant and tell others how better/best to live their lives (forgetting that they've somehow managed to survive 30/40/50 plus years without our input) or do we take it to change our own attitudes and take from it that we've seen how everyone makes mistakes and everyone is human, including ourselves and that's okay. Surely by the time we get to be not-so-young , when we find someone we are attracted to we could (should?) be able to say "I like you for who you are", rather than "I like you for who I can make you to be" ? I doubt that someone changing (especially at 'our age') to try to suit another persons' opinion is ever really successful - bitterness, resentment and frustration is a more likely outlook, imo.

If someone drains you with negativity or whatever, then walk away. Thankfully most of the time we have that option.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 202
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 5/24/2015 6:41:00 AM
I think that men can be more critical because women have made themselves too available and exchangeable.
 rennips1949
Joined: 3/6/2015
Msg: 203
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 5/24/2015 2:35:32 PM
Write me down as one who believes it's an individual personal issue, not an age-or gender-issue.
Some people would **** if they were hanged with a new rope.
Not meaning to be critical or contentious, but "women(making)themselves too available and exchangeable " is NOT what I am experiencing, so far.
Of course, I'm not shopping, nor do I wish to shop, in the desperation aisle.
 newoldgirl
Joined: 4/16/2015
Msg: 204
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 5/24/2015 4:39:11 PM

meaning to be critical or contentious, but "women(making)themselves too available and exchangeable " is NOT what I am experiencing, so far.


^^^^^^^^^^^
As evidenced by the numerous "nice guy" threads.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 205
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 3:18:54 AM
Not true.....it's not being critical and judgemental when you call someone out for being a shyt head, when Im in line at DQ to get that Oreo Blizzard and the guy with the long spiked hair gets in line behind me, I don't judge him on his hair....I tell him to be careful with that shyt next to me.

When you see the idiot who has no handicap tag or sticker and parks in the handicap spot and gets out and dances into the store, do I judge him? Pftt....please...not even....a little squirt of pepperspray on the drivers door handle and Im good thanks.

When I read NG's post's, is it being critical to say his 14 paragraphs are boring? Heck no...it's championing for those who go into "well fvk me" mode when they see the post. I mean who doesn't love to read the nutritional and ingredients label on a box of cereal at breakfast while trying to wake up....every frickin time....critical indeed.

I'm gonna go make some coffee and I'll be back to quash this obvious misunderstanding that older men are critical and judgemental...cause it ain't so.....
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 206
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 4:58:33 AM

....a little squirt of pepperspray on the drivers door handle and Im good thanks.


LOL! I'll have to remember that. Maybe brush the handle with a little Toxicodendron radicans - it's endemic around my home town...

I'd rather read the cereal box than some of these dissertations -- at least I'm learning something new and just what the heck are pyridoxine hydrochloride and mixed tocopherols doing in my Cheerios?

As a general rule, I don't find older men (or older women) complain any more than younger people. They just complain about different things.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 207
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 6:23:26 AM
I had to look up that radicans comment.

I was talking with someone else about ...of all things coffee.

She said she really liked it when someone had her coffee ready when she woke up.....like that's not on everyone's prefered list. But there's a chance someone could be critical of you once that precedence is set. For example my ex.

My ex liked that as well.....

I used to get up and make the coffee all the time....

Then she got to where if she woke up the same time as me she would ask if I've made the coffee yet...

Then she got where she would wake me up and ask if I've made the coffee yet.....

Then finally she got to the point she wouldn't even open her eyes and say "get up and make the coffee".

Not wanting to be considered judgemental I got to the point I said...

I'm trying to quit......however my effort to be non judgemental raised the question of whether she was being critical when she said she was leaving.

I dunno....:/
 daytripper02
Joined: 6/3/2015
Msg: 208
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 6:38:21 AM
I would have bought a coffee maker that has a auto timer set to make coffee at say 6:00 very morning. I mean, I like coffee to and who ever was up first made the coffee.

It's odd that later, sometimes years later, we get this "yes, that used to really piss me off". And there are days we are all cranky but I don't think it is age related.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 209
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Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 6:51:35 AM
Just an applicable observation:

there's a stage most people have to go through in their lives, as a part of moving from the childhood stage of blindly accepting the guidance of others (parents and other designated authorities), to making their own decisions, and accepting personal responsibility for those choices.

This stage actually has TWO phases to it, when it's negotiated correctly. The first phase, is recognizing that you have the power to make your own judgments about everything. The second VERY important phase, is to realize that the fact that you do make judgments about everything, doesn't make you a better person; in fact, making judgments requires taking on a lot of responsibility for whatever you are judging.

In short, some people get so excited about realizing that it's THEIR turn to be the jerk they always thought their parents and other authorities were, that they stop their personal development right there, and start awarding themselves style points every time they are rude to others.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 210
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 6:59:00 AM
It was a programmable coffee maker.. but someone still has to make the cup. Preferably served as they were beginning to sit up. :)

Those types of things are a pleasure to
do when they're are appreciated for what they are, when it becomes an expectation bordering on a requirement, not so much. :)
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 211
Cranky my ass
Posted: 6/27/2015 7:18:13 AM

In short, some people get so excited about realizing that it's THEIR turn to be the jerk they always thought their parents and other authorities were, that they stop their personal development right there, and start awarding themselves style points every time they are rude to others.

LOL - I just said almost the same thing in the 'having sex with ugly girls for practice' but you said it so much better.


Those types of things are a pleasure to do when they're are appreciated for what they are, when it becomes an expectation bordering on a requirement, not so much.

A little appreciation goes a long way... It's sad when a caring gesture becomes a habit seen as 'normal' and the expressed appreciation goes away. I think I would tend to stop before it became expectation. Or I'd switch to tea.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 212
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/27/2015 7:45:17 AM

I think that men can be more critical because women have made themselves too available and exchangeable.


I think women are likely more critical than men, but for sure they are much more skilled at hiding it.

Makes sense.

Women being physically weaker have evolved to express their hostility in more subtle ways to avoid physical retaliation. While men tend to express themselves more directly.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 213
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/27/2015 10:36:35 AM

I think that men can be more critical because women have made themselves too available and exchangeable.


Is that why there is 2500 pages of men in the Profile Reviews forum, wondering why they don't get many/any messages? Women are making themselves too available?
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 214
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/27/2015 3:35:48 PM

Is that why there is 2500 pages of men in the Profile Reviews forum, wondering why they don't get many/any messages? Women are making themselves too available?


Perhaps he was talking about Thailand? I do know a few nations where the women do just that!
 daytripper02
Joined: 6/3/2015
Msg: 215
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/27/2015 3:55:34 PM

I think that men can be more critical because women have made themselves too available and exchangeable.


I disagree. As well, I think women are far more critical and judgmental than men and that they always have been and always will be. Just my experience. My male friends rarely b1tch, my female friends get right to the ****ing.
 Strings6
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 216
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/27/2015 6:29:49 PM
Perhaps as men get older they get tired of the pursue me im a prize attitude some women hold on to as they drop bread crumbs and create pursuit scenarios...as a 50+ year old man I have no desire to pursue a 50+ year old woman who still thinks she is a "chick' and im a "dude"...we are too old and don't have the time to waste,if I like you and you like me lets get on with it.
 123nightmoves
Joined: 6/2/2015
Msg: 217
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/28/2015 5:47:47 PM
I agree with you Stings All this jumping through hoops and making the next person you date pay for the sins of the last person you dated or an ex. We ARE too old for the b.s.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 218
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/29/2015 8:13:27 AM
adventurejoe70, you have tunnel vision.


Is that why there is 2500 pages of men in the Profile Reviews forum, wondering why they don't get many/any messages? Women are making themselves too available?

Perhaps he was talking about Thailand? I do know a few nations where the women do just that!


It was deetristate in msg Msg: 210 that said women are making themselves too available. I disagreed with that.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 219
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/29/2015 9:10:16 AM
Well yeah, I started reading at message after yours from Fullmoon! and went up to the one above for reference.

That being said "is what I said wrong?":P I think NOT!
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 220
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/29/2015 10:21:34 AM

That being said "is what I said wrong?":P I think NOT!


What is "too available"?

Subjective at best.

Anyways, men make themselves more available in the USA, while women are more available in Thailand. Men are more critical in Thailand, while women are more critical here. Though in Thailand women often date with a chaperone, they are very clingy by American standards, and men tend to be vetted by the family. When you are in a relationship, the women's family is also a big part of the relationship, and there is the much talked about sin sod.

Basically, it's all very different, not just one aspect.

But we aren't talking globally here, it was about USA men being more critical / judgemental the older he is.
 JaiNai2
Joined: 5/30/2015
Msg: 221
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/30/2015 8:58:42 AM
I haven't found this to be true. Maybe you're just meeting the wrong kind of men. If a man treated me that way, he would be out of my life. I would gladly show him the door and tell him not to let it hit him on his way out. All men or women cannot be painted with the same brush! I allow only positive people into my life. No room for toxic people, men or women.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 222
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/30/2015 10:20:43 PM

Though in Thailand women often date with a chaperone, they are very clingy by American standards, and men tend to be vetted by the family

Well that's no fun if the women are more available. Talk about a stipulation! How do you have sex with them on the standard 3rd-4th date? Their family (or friend) chaperone going to watch? Or maybe 3-some?? ;)
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 223
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 6/30/2015 10:39:09 PM
Women who become more outspoken as they age, just dont care anymore what people think and don't suppress their ideas and opinions the way they may have done, in their people pleasing days. They don't change, just become more authentically themselves.

Some people do mellow with age and some get more grumpy especially if they have ailments to deal with.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 224
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The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 1:41:21 AM
yes they are vetted by the family to make sure that the guy getting the mail order bride, is going to contribute financially to the whole family. As for dating with a chaperone, I know a Western guy who married a Thai girl half his age and within three weeks..I doubt she had a chaperone..
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 225
The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....
Posted: 7/1/2015 7:55:40 AM

yes they are vetted by the family to make sure that the guy getting the mail order bride, is going to contribute financially to the whole family. As for dating with a chaperone, I know a Western guy who married a Thai girl half his age and within three weeks..I doubt she had a chaperone..


So how is that working out?

And from your post, it appears this wasn't a mail order bride? As in marriage sites that specialize in arranging "dates" for those wanting to get married to those they only meet on the Internet? Then the men all travel over in a group to meet their dates. Kind of like speed marriage Vs speed dating.
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > The older the man the more critical and judgmental he is....