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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness      Home login  
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 DeepakChoprahWinfrey
Joined: 5/16/2015
Msg: 50
Where you are all wrong on dealing with lonelinessPage 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Loneliness , in my case , leads to an overwhelming feeling of hopelessness ... and then a feeling of wanting to just go away and end the suffering once and for all
 browneyesseeking
Joined: 1/12/2013
Msg: 51
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 5/31/2015 5:49:07 PM
DeepakChoprahWinfrey, I hope you are okay! Please find someone in real life to talk to, and check back in so we know you are okay.

Find some activities you enjoy and spend time with your family and friends. This feeling is temporary and there are things that will make you feel better. pM me if you wish.
 You_Never_Knew_Me
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 52
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 5/31/2015 10:29:46 PM
motowncowgirl - 47

if developing your own coping mechanisms were easy 100% of the time, nobody would care because nobody would ever have to think about using their experiences as a force for positive change instead of malingering

Malingering? Seriously?


losing interest in what they used to do is a classic case of clinical depression, and that requires professional help... not a pep talk from a dating site forum.

I'm glad you caught that. I kind of mentioned in another post depression and killing oneself. as well as the one you quoted. Not as emphatic as clinical depression though.

A pep talk?

It's a distraction.
 You_Never_Knew_Me
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 53
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 4:12:50 AM
bamagrl68 - 48

bamagrl68 I'm so sorry for upsetting you. The post that upset you was just a general statement and not a critique of your post.


How someone could read all that I wrote and shared and make something negative out of it is beyond me

Your post was overwhelming. For you to share a part of your life in this manner was incredible knowing that it was all so close to your heart.

I am familiar with your posts and they always show empathy and understanding. A pleasure to read in a sea of ignorance and misunderstanding. I know you are fair and honest when it comes to exchanging your point of view.


I hope the OP reads what I wrote and realizes he is not alone in the world, that many of us have dealt with tragedy and loss and found a way to over come it.

He is reading it. He wrote to me. Hopefully he comes back.

I'm sorry bamagrl68 I never meant to offend you.

What a terrible apology
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 54
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History
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 4:17:18 AM
Hey, no one said life was easy. You may think that some get handed everything, Some do. And when things get tough, they fold, or fight back. Adversity builds character. I've been handed the s h it end of the stick plenty of times. Instead of griping about it, I take hold, find a place to throw it, go wash my hands, and move on. No one really wants to know how nasty it was, or how badly it smelled. We will sit there quietly, and listen to you tell your story. But we don't want to hear about it over and over.

Stand up and start moving forward. Opportunity will soon present itself. Not everyone hands you the dirty end of the stick. Learn to spot the clean end. One day you'll look at the past as ancient history, and can close the book on it.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 55
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 9:45:27 AM

Malingering? Seriously?

as if *some* people never become experts at feeling sorry for themselves.


A pep talk?
It's a distraction.

it's a free internet dating site. if you don't like what people say, then stop distracting yourself and get help from someone who is actually qualified to understand the problem.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 56
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 9:52:41 AM
http://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2012/07/16/10-more-ideas-to-help-with-loneliness/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/ross-a-rosenberg/loneliness_b_4648417.html
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/making-change/201401/overcoming-loneliness
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 57
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 3:26:54 PM
you never know- I've never shared all of that because some people on here can be so mean, and all of that is so personal, but if I could reach out to another human in pain and help by sharing it, I was willing to try.
Please let the OP know, if you hear from them, that they can pm me too.
We had a misunderstanding, what people mean can come across the wrong way online, I've had it happen.
At least you were willing to apologize and I accept it.
 You_Never_Knew_Me
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 58
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 8:14:21 PM
norwegianguy123 - 49

You can't give up or give in to something you have NO control over. Which is why it'd be silly to say everyone with a mental problem has absolutely NO control over it.

You win. I haven't a clue what I was trying to say and doubt I ever will.
 You_Never_Knew_Me
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 59
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/1/2015 8:21:52 PM
DeepakChoprahWinfrey. Why did you come and go so quickly. It appears you have something to offer to this thread, why not do so.
 JoeBnD
Joined: 3/23/2012
Msg: 60
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/2/2015 11:59:24 AM

I've been handed the s h it end of the stick plenty of times.


Wait!!! There is another end of the stick?????
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 61
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History
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/2/2015 9:30:45 PM
And who says you have to grab a stick? Excrementally enriched end or otherwise??

And who says loneliness is never ending?? As soon as you meet someone you like spending time with that lonely feeling goes away. If you never meet that person, liking yourself can go a long way towards fostering feelings about yourself that make you feel.... Less lonely.

Or, maybe that is just a delusional point of view on my part. Or, maybe that is just how I choose to look at life. I figure, if and until I meet the woman who is a cure all for loneliness I'll try liking me for me. And, if she shows up and feels the same then I guess that'd be a win- win....
 You_Never_Knew_Me
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 62
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/3/2015 5:06:48 AM
bamagrl68 thank you for accepting my apology. I never meant to hurt you.

bamagrl68 - 59

I've never shared all of that because some people on here can be so mean, and all of that is so personal, but if I could reach out to another human in pain and help by sharing it, I was willing to try.

Because of that post you have become real to me. Someone who has demonstrated that in this world of ignorant self important people there shines someone like you who understands and has something very few people on the forums do

Empathy

I spoke with the OP just briefly and he is as excitable as he showed on his first post. The reason he wrote me was because of something I posted and because of that I'm sure he is reading the posts, after all this is his thread and about him. I hope he comes back and participates because he is the only one that can convey his true feelings and emotions, I can only guess.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 63
Where you are all wrong on dealing with loneliness
Posted: 6/3/2015 8:25:28 AM

in this world of ignorant self important people

if you're going to be a misanthropist, then there's no use demanding empathy from everyone else around you while expressing such broad-based hostility for the human race. people just aren't going to feel it for you, and that's life. you'll never win fighting human nature, so find ways to make it work in your favor instead.

just based on the law of averages, most people aren't any more self important than you are, especially when you're rebuking everyone for not stepping up to supply a sufficient dose of empathy to meet your personal comfort level.

but if you find yourself feeling energized by others' empathy, then you need to find a proper host. what you need is someone who can delve deeply into your concerns with you, one-on-one, at an affordable hourly rate. or just find another forum that is more your style. either way, it's not a big deal and it certainly isn't the world's problem.
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