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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 276
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.Page 12 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

- Don’t you people understand? ALL THAT MATTERS TO ME HERE IS WINNING DEBATES.


Real debates have time limits, rules and judges.

Here you win because people don't have the time to continue to debate endless when they know they will never change minds.

You aren't really winning the dabate, you are winning a writing endurance contest.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 277
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:05:51 AM

Don’t you people understand? ALL THAT MATTERS TO ME HERE IS WINNING DEBATES.


REally? You haven't won anything.

And you've only proved that you are stubborn, unwilling to change, and that you have the verbosity to cancel any positive thought gone your way.

You are so afraid of change, of that possible failure that you prefer to live through pain avoidance. You would cut your nose off to prove you won, when the only thing that you'd achieve is that now you don't have a nose.


Oh well.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 278
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:15:54 AM
^^^ InnerGorilla

Nailed it. But you forgot to add "just friggin boring" to the list.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 279
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:42:22 AM

Don’t you people understand? ALL THAT MATTERS TO ME HERE IS WINNING DEBATES.[\quote]

Because you ....



do think I'm one of the smartest people in the world [\quote]







REally? You haven't won anything[\quote]

*mic drop






 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 280
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History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:45:17 AM
"You aren't really winning the dabate, you are winning a writing endurance contest."

I'll take that, too!

One problem is, it's always me against like 20 people. Which is an underdog role that I relish, but I have to write 5000 things to address the many different points of all 20 different people.

The other problem is that I'm not on POF 24/7 like most of you. I almost never log on from home and I don't have it on my phone (really, this is just a work diversion). I logged on once each on Saturday and Sunday (which is actually quite unusual for me, because I usually don't log in on the weekends at all) and naturally during those 24 hours between log-ins each day, there were so many things thrown at me that I actually didn't even have enough time to address all the things that I wanted to since I had a million "real world" things to do those days -- I actually declined a lunch invitation from my best friend to deal with Sunday's post. If I logged in as frequently as most of you, I would probably be able to respond to individuals within 3 or 4 posts of their post to me and my posts would be much shorter -- not actually SHORT, but responding to 10-15 people in one post, admittedly, does lead to "walls of text." But much like my dating issues, there is really no way to fix that -- I'm not going to log onto this cesspool of a site anymore often than I have to.

Well, the obvious way to fix it is what happened in May and June when I didn't make a single post, and most of the people in this thread were doing the anti-Hawking happy dance, yet at the same time, some people were also wishing I was around. I think I may go back into complete POF hibernation, because I was less stressed that way. Debating to win takes its toll on you after a while and the last month has been pretty hardcore, despite the fact that I have only participated in 5 threads (compared to the dozens some of you have been in -- yes, I track many of you, statistics and all).
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 281
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:51:53 AM
well I guess all us limp brain swine know why he can't get a date :/
Debate? No talking someone to death is not a debate.
Shark? Sharks have no arms so cannot clinch
Cross burning? hmmm
It isn't because you are shorter, or darker, or " smarter " than others
as proven by your most recent post
it is because you behave like DB
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 282
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 8:54:18 AM
I officially declare hawking to be the winner so that he can finally get some rest.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 283
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 9:20:03 AM
blogs or journals, debating oneself could be potentially therapeutic...
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 284
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 9:57:58 AM
Ouija: I will give you that point on the shark, since in my haste I misspelled "clench." But as for:

"it is because you behave like DB "

Forum behavior is not real life behavior. Right, KJ and Pig? Say it to yourself over and over again -- NOTHING HERE IS REAL UNTIL YOU MEET. Forum regulars are all just a bunch of semi-animated characters written by their authors for the amusement of the others.

(BTW, as I've stated many times, I grew up in rural Alabama, and cross burning was most definitely a serious threat then -- when I was a kid, my uncle had multiple ones burned in his yard until he left the state. I realize, though, for most people cross burning seems like a fiction or a relic of very distant past.)

Peas: I debate myself in POF threads all the time. Probably no one says "On the other hand..." more than I do. I am my own devil's advocate.

Motown: Thank-you!

And see how much shorter my posts are when I can respond within an hour or two!
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 285
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 10:05:00 AM
I'd give Hawk a prize for winning, but POF sadly ran out of oven mitts and spatulas, and for some reason all the coasters are gone, too.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 286
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 10:10:26 AM

I officially declare hawking to be the winner so that he can finally get some rest.


But his posts are very addictive, and well written..what would we read then?

All the repetitive threads on "maple syrup", "what does this mean?" , "is he an alias of a troll?", etc, has gotten a bit stale as of late.

It is rare we get stats and figures from a genuine guy who works with stats and figures!
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 287
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 10:11:17 AM

And see how much shorter my posts are when I can respond within an hour or two!


Oh my god, oh my god, a short post!!! a brief post!!!! Hallelujah!

You win, just on that one.

Hehehehe.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 288
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 10:34:06 AM
"It is rare we get stats and figures from a genuine guy who works with stats and figures!"

This is undoubtedly why my POF forums character is much more popular among the male demographic than the female demographic. "Moneyball" and all.
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 289
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 11:06:29 AM

I just don’t care anymore!


He's escalating. You guys create a diversion - I'll grab his gun!
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 290
view profile
History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 11:15:39 AM

It’s because I’m a perfect storm of dating negatives: height, race, child status, age, all combined make me appealing to less than 1% of the female population.

The age isn't bad -- it's a pretty popular one for online, and if you look younger like you do, IRL it's not a huge deterrent (but requires adjustment), and other sites will garner different results than others. Child status (zero)? Not a negative. And you can't have your age AND child-status both being negatives at the same time through and through, tho. If age is a deterrent for younger women to some degree, not having kids is a positive in that direction. You having a toddler (especially if majority or full custody) is going to be more a deterrent to gals who's kids (many our age group do; especially on POF) are old enough not to need a babysitter. IMO, it limits Your options, as those in your/our age group tend to have kids that we may not see as ideal in many situations. But if you did suddenly find out you were a baby daddy right now, that would Limit your options more, as far as the dating scene's concerned.

All in all, it's height #1, race to some extent #2 (if you lived in Nebraska, it may be a close 2nd; Tampa, it's a pretty distant 2nd, but that depends on Your own tastes too).

Yet as I’ve stated before, my first few years on POF, I got an average of 2-3 unsolicited views a week.

It's a weak indicator. Don't put all your chips on that. Yes, you're not a hot commodity by default online. I agree. But to beat it down like (essentially) Nobody wants you -- let go of that -- it's a horrible marker for that. Yes, you're in a weaker position. Yes, you're going to get few initial views. I *guarantee* if I ripped your pics off even the same pics (needs improvement) off your profile and made you a new one in another big city, you would not be hitting 1-2 views a month -- you'd be getting much more (along with me making your profile lol). Also, I made a POF for a friend and give him login/pass. I told him he's got to write gals otherwise he won't show up. He told me that's not true, how it worked, etc -- I told him Just Do It. Sure enough, he was getting more views and got a chick to mail him. A virgin. He popped her virginity, albeit after marrying her (I didn't think it was worth it, but he did - oh well). Point is, you need to clean the house and move into a new one -- with different decorative angles in mind.

What you're pointing out are indicators -- not conclusive proof at all, man. If you were ugly (while being short as you are) and living in your parents' basement saving up for a brand new motor home of your own, and your idea of movies was video-taping shadow puppets on the side of white vans at dark -- OK. That's not the case dude, sorry. :)

What you have is to complain about a Lack of viable/good options... that it takes a long time for one to sprout on all the main dating sites + IRL. OK. Can't argue with that. But roughly zero options? Throw-in-the-towel mentality? No man, no. I know it's saddening news for you, but you've got it all wrong. :)

my relative level of failure on Tinder (I have younger male friends who get many more matches than I do and date regularly from it) actually does seem to suggest that I am NOT a very attractive man

Not ideal pictures for that theme + your age hitting THAT is not ideal, even tho with Match it Is more ideal than early-mid 20-somethings. You do need to change things up. Your primary photo -- your smile has mixed emotions written into it (smiling but something's bothering you). Get a new profile picture without you next to someone taller, and ditch your photo in the blue shirt, and the N.O. Voodoo one. The one by the river is great (as an additional photo). Your old photo at the end looks good but gives you that young small look + 37 --- I wouldn't go with that. You can do a lot more with your photo arrangement. It doesn't require being ugly to have girls pass you over when you're 1 amongst gawd-knows-how-many dudes lined up. Which is why rotating pics and getting new pics is Key to garnering attention.

But you shouldn't rely on girls viewing or writing you first. That's the bottom line. It's an indicator as to whether you need improvement/changes, that's about it.

I also haven’t added a new close friend of either gender in a good decade, but I’ve certainly piled up the rejections during that period. So I’m not sure that description is accurate.

Have you read books on PUA? The Game? About a guy like you (short, felt unattractive too) -- a writer. He was asked to make a book compiling this new "PUA" literature online... and then it changed him. No, not to use women for sex (although there's many who do so for that purpose) -- but how he didn't realize there was a new door to be opened. No, not to be a porn star king -- but then again, when one's as he (and you) describe, it only takes a fraction of that to "let there be light".
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 291
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 11:26:02 AM
I never read the long posts. Never really have, even from posters I like.

Hawking is the exception. They can be on the long side, but they don't ramble. They're actually pretty damn concise. There's just a lot in them and it's always worth reading.
 ThePigIsHereForEternity
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 292
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 11:55:50 AM


Pig: Okay, what do I need to do that I haven’t already done at some point or another, besides delete my profile?


Letting go of the analyzing and over thinking. As I said, over thinking leads to imagining problems and obstacles that may not even exist, and you likely end up talking yourself out of what needs to be done.


To be perfectly honest, I'm pretty much just on this site for the forums at this point (one of the most shameful things I've ever had to admit in my life) and having had the same profile for 8 years allows me to avoid a bunch of sock and puppet and whatnot accusations.


Dude, come on. You've already said you're not looking to make friends with anyone, why would you care about their accusations? F*ck them.



Forum behavior is not real life behavior. Right, KJ and Pig?


True for the most part, I would say. Although, she and I agreed that her and my online and offline personalities paralleled.
 LLove2LaughToo
Joined: 3/5/2011
Msg: 293
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 12:00:48 PM

HawkingJr :
Told you I would win this debate. Don’t you people understand? ALL THAT MATTERS TO ME HERE IS WINNING DEBATES.

Quite frankly, I think those who only write one or two lines most of the time are attempting to hide an embarrassing level of education.


Unbelievable. It’s no wonder why some people are still single.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 294
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History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:07:46 PM
“Well, that seemed mean to me.”

Most everyone from post 267 to post 280 belittled me (hah) and some of them have done so many times over the years, often unprovoked, so I wasn’t exactly going to come back all nice-nice. Anyone that’s a cyberbully, I’m going to tear them asunder – couldn’t care less what their feelings are, considering they get their jollies from tearing people down. I speak to them in their own crude language of insults and harsh personal criticism. People who speak to me like you do can rest assured that I was not including you in “limp-brained swine.”

Going back quickly to what you said right before all that: am I an “uncompromising choice addict”? Do you REALLY want me to go back to dating women I find unattractive? Do you REALLY want me to do that to those women (especially the ones with children)? I think most of the women in this thread will agree, the world is a better place for me being dateless. And can you REALLY see me with a 300 pound chainsmoking high school dropout drug addict with a half dozen kids? You act is if the “compromise” I’d end up with is a slightly overweight Asian school teacher in a wheelchair or something, and I can tell you unequivocally that it’s not the slightly overweight Asian school teachers in wheelchairs who are writing me back or were sending me first contact messages. I have actually done what many men are always telling “picky” women to do, and the results were not pretty. I am indeed on women’s side on this, and you’d be hardpressed to find a case in which I said women should compromise on their preferences. The fact that their preferences have made my life miserable is my problem, not theirs -- if dating a short man is going to make a woman miserable, then I don't want to date her. I'm not trying to talk women into dating short men or black men or whatever with these threads. I'm just contributing stats and personal experience on the subject.

HD, Pig: Thanks.

Norwegian: I don’t really feel like continuing down that route. This thread has taken a depressing turn...
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 295
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:15:10 PM

There's just a lot in them and it's always worth reading.


Is it? Really worth reading if the poster thinks of you as.....



I don’t want to be any of your goddamn friends and almost none of you entertain me. One of the few pleasures I get in this miserable godforsaken life is debating people to death on message boards. I don’t really know why – it’s just euphoric to me. Maybe because I rarely engage in debates in real life.


he rambles on to annoy the fuk out of us as his entertainment because he says his life is miserable
Well holy fuk, DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT THEN!
THAT ain't rocket science.
Most likely he doesn't engage in debates in real life because people shut him before he starts
Like debates Hawk? Go to Offtopics
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 296
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History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:19:43 PM
^^^^I think that is utter BS. He wouldn't have shown up to the "meeting" if he really meant/thought that! I guess it is his attempt at being humorous!
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 297
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:41:16 PM
Eventually you have to get shit or get off the damn pot. Complaining multiple times, doing a "woe is me" routine, self-hating while having a "superior than thou" attitude isn't going to get him anywhere. Take away the stats and his argument is no different than the pity parties we read in here all the time.

Hawking is damn near 40 years old and when his attitude is this.


Do you REALLY want me to do that to those women (especially the ones with children)? I think most of the women in this thread will agree, the world is a better place for me being dateless. And can you REALLY see me with a 300 pound chainsmoking high school dropout drug addict with a half dozen kids? You act is if the “compromise” I’d end up with is a slightly overweight Asian school teacher in a wheelchair or something, and I can tell you unequivocally that it’s not the slightly overweight Asian school teachers in wheelchairs who are writing me back or were sending me first contact messages


Then he's content at being alone.

Because common sense states that it's not either, at the end of the day it is what it is. You can't claim you're ugly and that no one wants you but then refuse to compromise because supposedly you're so ugly, geeky and short that no chick wants you but you're ugly, geeky, short ass is too good for most women. Because if a woman doesn't fit your image then she must be a overweight, drugged out, trailer trash, welfare queen who has multiple kids with different men pulling tricks on pornhub. Because that's exactly the type of women people are supposedly telling you to pursue. You either compromise or you don't but the complaining at this point is whining. If you're not willing to adapt and change anything then you are screwed and you'll continually grow to become more resentful of women and just life period.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 298
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:49:57 PM

I think most of the women in this thread will agree, the world is a better place for me being dateless.


As you wish.

Remember that what you think you are, you become.


ou either compromise or you don't but the complaining at this point is whining. If you're not willing to adapt and change anything then you are screwed and you'll continually grow to become more resentful of women and just life period.


But add to that an alone bitter person that continues to complaint and b i t ch, yet justifying his unwillingness to change anything.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 299
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 1:56:18 PM

Eventually you have to get shit or get off the damn pot. Complaining multiple times, doing a "woe is me" routine, self-hating while having a "superior than thou" attitude isn't going to get him anywhere. Take away the stats and his argument is no different than the pity parties we read in here all the time.

Hawking is damn near 40 years old and when his attitude is this.



:)
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 300
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/10/2015 2:16:45 PM

I think most of the women in this thread will agree...


What a bizarre statement. Clearly he's lost it.
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