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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 376
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.Page 16 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
Sheeple need leading. :/
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 377
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/13/2015 5:46:58 PM

and people who quote stats/
Statistics are no substitute for judgment.
Henry Clay
I just read that people will indeed stand (zigzag not around) especially if there are people in a line up. So the more people standing around, more that will join the line.
They even announce fake wait times, so if the line moves faster the waitees are happy.
I'm not seguing well am I?


It's like going to a club early when the doors first open and for the first hour no one dances even if the music is good because no one wants to look like an idiot and embarrass themselves. It takes two or three people to start dancing then people start hitting the dance floor.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 378
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/13/2015 6:22:29 PM
I've noticed that at dance clubs too.

that's why my date and I are almost ALWAYS the first ones on the floor.

I dance when I want to, not when the crowd wants to.

i'm a very confident man.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 379
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/13/2015 7:09:46 PM
Ha :0 D and I would go, he was about as bad as me dancing
He'd get up alone
Next there would be a couple of women join him
then some guys
My husband would be in a sea of dancers
just enjoying himself
Which is why we had VIP passes to everywhere

Me, I would sit and pray no one would ask me to dance, and they did. Poor things
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 380
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 6:23:10 AM
“I read profiles and I assumed (apparently incorrectly) that other people did, too. However, that's not particularly relevant since your comment was that you didn't know what your type is. You didn't say anything about how to search for it.”

Not really sure what the purpose of that first sentence quoted there was considering I obviously read profiles from what I said in what you quoted, but on the last, here is what I said: “You tell me who my equivalent is, the women I should be messaging, and I’ll send them messages and we’ll see what happens... I don’t have any idea what my equivalent woman is. Any of you can tell me right here in this thread and end my anguish over this matter. If you think it’s like porn and you can’t define it, just do a *search* of women in Tampa and send me an email with equivalent females for me to contact.” This whole discussion is about POF messaging, which begins with a search. Real life requires a completely different discussion.

“I never bothered with search parameters, except for age.”/”Efficiency is irrelevant when it takes so little time to send a message.”

So, in the largest market in the South, fourth largest in the country, with nearly 4 million women overall and undoubtedly close to 100,000 of them on POF, you just let POF randomly send you profiles? I don’t know what your face looks like, but your physical dating characteristics are such that a “strategy” of that type would probably pay off as far as getting women to respond, but it’s certainly not an efficient use of your time unless you have absolutely no dating preferences. Which would make you a pretty rare human being.

“Okc doesn't have body type searches except for paid upgrades and that search didn't work like it was supposed to when I was dating.”

Oh, wait, so you DO have dating preferences. So what’s the point of including BBWs in your POF searches if you’re pretty sure you have no interest in dating them? (I’m inferring from that line and your athletic body type and you claiming previously that “age” was the only search parameter you use on POF.) Surely an intelligent, well-educated man such as yourself must realize not using the body type filter leads to wasted time under such circumstances.

Imagine if you dedicated exactly 30 minutes to POF every day, and it takes 2 minutes to click on a profile, skim it and message it. At most you could contact 15 women. But what if half the population is overweight (not far off from reality for Dallas) and you only date fellow athletic women? Without the body type filter, 50% of your search returns are going to be pointless. You'd be reduced to 7 or 8 women maximum that you could contact in 30 minutes, possibly leading you to missing out on your dream girl, who could have been 9th had you made it to her.

While you should be taking your own preferences into consideration in order to make a site with tens of thousands of possibilities more efficient, due to my very low response rate, I have to take women’s preferences into consideration in order to take a site with tens of thousands of possibilities more efficient. What would be the purpose of including 6 foot tall women in my searches? There is a near zero percent chance they are going to respond, so there is a near zero percent chance I’m going to use valuable time messaging them. Clicking on a 6 foot tall woman’s profile is just several seconds I could have used to click on the profile of a woman I actually do have a (remote) chance with. No one has infinite time to spend on this site. Well, except in the forums, apparently.

“I'm not seguing well am I?”

Yeah, quoting someone’s anti-statistics quote and then immediately following it up with results from a study is not a particularly good segue, among other things. Though the phenomenon described in that study is my experience as well – that’s why you need drunks that "just don't care" to get the fun started.
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 381
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 6:42:14 AM
"They" say "curiosity killed the cat". I say THEY are full of it.

Or are they? I am starting to get the impression that ALMOST everyone who has chimed in on this thread so far... has become so jaded that they don't EVER simply click randomly on one of those 8 pics that show up at the top of many pages? Because maybe the pic is so good OR so bad, you can't figure out what "it" is, [likely a super close up of a body part usually] possibly wild colors, or maybe just shows your weakness for perhaps a bald head or long hair or some other reason?

Or maybe some/MOST of you are using "smart" phones to do most of your Fishing here? Those images would have to be quite tiny/not big enough to whet your appetite?
 spot4username
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 382
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 7:19:42 AM

They" say "curiosity killed the cat". I say THEY are full of it.

Or are they? I am starting to get the impression that ALMOST everyone who has chimed in on this thread so far... has become so jaded that they don't EVER simply click randomly on one of those 8 pics that show up at the top of many pages? Because maybe the pic is so good OR so bad, you can't figure out what "it" is, [likely a super close up of a body part usually] possibly wild colors, or maybe just shows your weakness for perhaps a bald head or long hair or some other reason?

Or maybe some/MOST of you are using "smart" phones to do most of your Fishing here? Those images would have to be quite tiny/not big enough to whet your appetite?


Well, I am at work so I am on my laptop. If you are referring to the photos at the top of the page here in the forums well they are all photos of women (as POF refuses to keep me logged in) and I happen to be strictly d i c k l y. They are also women a thousand miles away. So no, I don't click on them randomly or otherwise.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 383
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 8:32:49 AM
"I am starting to get the impression that ALMOST everyone who has chimed in on this thread so far... has become so jaded that they don't EVER simply click randomly on one of those 8 pics that show up at the top of many pages?"

If you're talking about the top of the forums page, then like spot said, those are pretty useless -- all of mine are from, by mere coincidence considering I'm currently mostly debating with MaleFeasance, Dallas-Ft. Worth, but that has been true for months -- before that it was Los Angeles. I don't know when the last time they were from Tampa. I will sometimes click on one of them out of curiosity, but obviously I've never bothered to message anyone that lives 1000+ miles away.

If you're talking about the thumbnails at the top of the inbox, profiles and related pages, which usually are from my area (unless the profile I'm on is from another market), then, yes, I will click on those if they look interesting and message them if appropriate, because at least I know they are recently/currently active on the site. But I don't end up messaging them very often because of disqualifiers in their profiles (either directly written or inferred from their profile statistics) -- I don't think they are entirely randomly chosen because I rarely get taller women, probably mostly from your Matches, but nevertheless mostly a hodgepodge.

On a related matter, I hadn't touched Meet Me since it became paid to see who wants to meet you over a year ago (as I figured women would stop bothering to use it, so what was the point), but I did some experimenting with it over the past few days just out of curiosity, and I think people (at least those close to my age or younger) actually are starting to use that more than actual messaging since it is so similar to the current smart phone fad Tinder. You do get to see your Double Matches for free, so apparently that is good enough for most women. Immediately upon using it, I managed 3 double matches from women that had apparently already clicked "Yes" to me, wrote 2 of them and they both wrote back. A couple days after clicking "Yes" a ton of times, I got some more Double Matches. When I was using it before it became a paid feature, I never got Double Matches and rarely got any women asking to meet me. I would say this is likely the Tinder/smart phone influence -- again, reading elaborate profiles and sending articulate messages on a smart phone is a bit of trouble, but just clicking "Yes" and "No"? So maybe I just didn't realize the way that POF is being used by the younger generations has changed.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 384
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 6:18:22 PM

I happen to be strictly d i c k l y.


I never heard it put that way spot4username but I like it.
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 385
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 7:33:24 PM
^ Oh, for crying out loud. Next you're going to propose that that guy who says he doesn't like sex is attempting to employ some sort of reverse psychology tactic ;)
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 386
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 7:40:24 PM
I have to say dance clubs to differentiate them from other clubs such as night clubs, drinking clubs, comedy clubs, gambling clubs, private clubs and membership clubs. here in Clearwater/Tampa/St. Petersburg there are lots of country clubs as well.

thank you for your concern but i'm fine.
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 387
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/14/2015 9:34:05 PM
^ Not even if I let you bury me in your back yard first? It will be an excellent photo opp...

I freaking crack myself up, I'm not even kidding.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 388
Profile errors, heights, weights, measurements, statistics and troll droppings
Posted: 8/15/2015 3:36:50 AM
thank you, NJ, that was quite sweet and made me smile.

Hawking, in case you didn't notice--and you're obviously smart enough to have done so--that's a rather pretty lady who is publically admitting to thinking you're worth meeting in public. I'm thinking of that post elsewhere here where someone has to see a zillion photos before they'll leave the house, and here's someone who thinks you're worth a little bit of risk.

not that i'm reading into her intentions, and of course, "glasses half full" and all that, but heck, you're doing better than some of the fellows complaining about OLD.consider the guys who complain they can't even get an email returned. take whatever consolation that you can.

as for dance clubs and how no one gets on the floor until everyone's on the floor...yeah, I get that. a few hours ago I was at a concert/party and the first one on the floor every time was both a great dancer and had a killer bod. So I can see why she was confident to get out there and shake her money maker. but otherwise, the only time I could get someone on the floor that early was if I got them to put their back to the audience so they wouldn't worry about what people think.

I suspect, however, the real reason it takes some so long is....that's the time it takes for the liquor to kick in and give them the courage.

and as for the whole leading others routine...gotta say after a parking deck full of beautiful women...its weird walking past 50 people to go talk to some stranger, b/c darn, its pretty obvious why I'm talking to her (the same reason every other guy does) and not the 50 people I just walked past.

and finally, burying WAMB in the back yard as a photo op? do we collectively hate the bathroom selfie that much?
"oh, you want a recent photo of me? well, here's me planting a forum member, no photoshop...I think it was back in august. you can see my biceps in this photo."
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 389
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/15/2015 4:53:59 AM

Oluben
^ Oh, for crying out loud. Next you're going to propose that that guy who says he doesn't like sex is attempting to employ some sort of reverse psychology tactic ;)

Al I have to say is that I am never, ever going to have sex with you, ok? ;-)



Whatsamatterbaby

^ Not even if I let you bury me in your back yard first? It will be an excellent photo opp...

I freaking crack myself up, I'm not even kidding.


Is this all more of the reverse psych stuff?
 Moderate_Recall
Joined: 3/1/2015
Msg: 390
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/15/2015 6:37:09 AM

Is this all more of the reverse psych stuff?


It is called standard FFSFFA.












( Forumites flirting safely from far away.)

(Wrote my thesis on that OLD phenomenon...)
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 391
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/15/2015 7:50:29 AM

Please stop calling them "dance" clubs. They are just clubs.

I agree to some extent. They are best called 'clubs' if it's not centered around a (big) dance floor.

While you should be taking your own preferences into consideration in order to make a site with tens of thousands of possibilities more efficient, due to my very low response rate, I have to take women’s preferences into consideration in order to take a site with tens of thousands of possibilities more efficient. What would be the purpose of including 6 foot tall women in my searches?

Generally wanted-people is enough. I guess if a dating site had a Rating... that every user had to rate on a scale of 1-10 on a viewed profile in order to see another one, then it'd be best to filter by that, weeding out the lower part. Thankfully though, there's few super-tall chicks online.

Imagine if you dedicated exactly 30 minutes to POF every day, and it takes 2 minutes to click on a profile, skim it and message it. At most you could contact 15 women.

15 female targets a day adds up over time. That's over 450 a month. Assuming one's weeding out fuglies, way-out-of-age-range, super-religious and the like -- you would end up hitting up cute gals who are a bit too out of your league, too tall, seemingly too easy (meaning tons o c0ck emailing them), etc. Why not? Say every month 100 of those are "too good". OK. 1% gets you one a month.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 392
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/16/2015 12:40:06 PM
oluben asked:

@Tom: serious question - do these dance clubs happen during the day? Do you mean like ballroom dancing?


here in Clearwater we DO have dance clubs that the main attraction is fast dancing. if you don't know the definition of that, older people call it an invented name derived from Arthur Murray and Fred Astaire Dance Studios called "freestyle". I've been fast dancing since the mid 1960's. we named it fast dancing.

we have some clubs in the area that start the live music for dancing at one in the afternoon TUESDAY THROUGH SUNDAY. the dance music goes on into the night with one band after another. at JD's in Indian Rocks Florida on the Gulf Of Mexico they routinely have 3 bands a day out on their covered deck with a big bar and dance floor.

they do tunes like Blurred Lines, Happy, Funk You Up, Usher, Lady Gaga, Rihanna, Katy Perry stuff as well as disco and Motown. it's not unusual to see couples grinding and booty shaking some (unfortunately) in their 50's and 60's. plus inside JD's there's a guy playing pop tunes on a piano every night starting at 7pm with a SECOND dance floor where people mostly jitterbug or swing dance.

we also have clubs that are primarily dance clubs situated on the top of the hotels on the Gulf Of Mexico that are OPEN TO THE AIR. you can dance under the moon and stars and see the Gulf as you dance, drink and canoodle with the opposite sex. there are lots of places that are called tiki bars and most of them have dance floors and many are right on the water. my favorite tiki bar is The Wave At Shepherd's Nightclub. outside in the weather and projecting over the water of the Gulf this giant upscale deck has a huge stage and big dance floor and a swimming pool. bikinis and Daisy Dukes are the regular apparel.

so this is why I say "Dance Clubs" to differentiate them from all the other clubs we have here:
country clubs
strip clubs
swinger/adult sex clubs
clothing optional clubs
comedy clubs
the moose, elks, rotary and knights of columbus clubs
ordinary drinking clubs and nightclubs that have music but no dancing
gambling clubs
private clubs

any other questions hit me up.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 393
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Posted: 8/16/2015 12:42:40 PM
When I use the word dance club...I usually mean disco/rock clubs like Saturday Night fever style.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 394
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/16/2015 4:43:46 PM
Mr. Secretary Of Defense

that's what we USED to have in Youngstown. they were all over the country. I lived Saturday Night Fever in real life.
my two friends and I were known as The Diamond Dogs, not only for our dance moves but our clothes and personality. all three of us made great money and had cars, clothes and different dates each week. we'd alternate driving to the dances and social events. I had a Black 500 HP 440 six pack Dodge Charger, Alec had an orange 340 Cuda and Eric had a 911 E Targa Porshe. we had custom made clothes made by Shy Lockson Tailors in Youngstown, usually made of white and black satin (my favorite) or gold lame' (Eric). we went to the dance clubs 3 times a week sometimes traveling to clubs in Cleveland (the Mad Hatter) or Pittsburgh (the Electric Banana).

I don't see any lighted dance floors or dance offs like we did in the 70's. those are just a memory now.

back in the day, we'd form a Soul Train line and I would go down and do spins, flips, splits and other tricky body and hand moves then the DJ would have applause gauge the 2 winners. then we'd have a dance off to determine the Numero Uno Dancer. my friends and I would get together to practice or work on brand new moves at each other's homes. it was a great time period.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 395
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/16/2015 5:05:03 PM
^^^Mr President,

Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, the location of Saturday night fever still had those clubs up into 15 years ago. Now I think they still exist in Staten Island, the borough where old Guido's go to die!

Your tanning business would have made money there...it is the land of Orange glowing people!

ps-I am wearing a white suit in one of my pics-lol
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 396
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/16/2015 6:51:23 PM
Flash forward a decade and I'm in (teen) dance clubs out- breakdance each other.
Graduated to nightclubs when legal and would literally dance from the time I got there to closing.
Remember the Lamabada ? GREAT workout and sex on the floor (with clothes on) at the same time lol
I met a Seattle Seahawks player at one club years ago, he and l were literally like Fred and Ginger dancing to Pop and hip-hop. It was one of the best nights of my life!~ Damn... I should have returned his calls for a date. *facepalms


dancing.. damn I miss it
I can totally relate Tom :)
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 397
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/16/2015 9:10:16 PM
Mr. Secretary, I cannot picture you in a white suit and black shirt. please say you didn't....but I admit I had one too!!!
Charmin I would enjoy dancing your butt off !

so far I taken a number of women dancing most of them about my height and one shortie:
two New York girls who don't know that there is a letter "R" in the alphabet.
one Rhode Island girl with an accent I can't even describe.
one Ukrainian with an accent so thick I couldn't understand her plus she was a vegan and no restaurant was good enough for her. but she did like her wodka.
last night I dated my first Scottish Lassie from Glasgow. she had a sweet soft brogue going on and her name was of course Kathleen, an RN very pretty. one of the few girls who doesn't care that she's taller than me in heels. we're going out again.
a few days ago in real life I asked the young lady at the bank to go out with me but she said they are not allowed to date customers. she seemed second generation Indian or Pakistani. hmmm wonder if that's true what she said.
am writing to two girls on POF living here in Clearwater who are from my hometown.

moral of the story:
my height doesn't get in the way of dating on here or in the real world.
you gotta swing the bat if you wanna get a hit.
 MaleFeasance
Joined: 3/13/2015
Msg: 398
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/17/2015 12:42:31 AM
Oh, wait, so you DO have dating preferences. So what’s the point of including BBWs in your POF searches if you’re pretty sure you have no interest in dating them? (I’m inferring from that line and your athletic body type and you claiming previously that “age” was the only search parameter you use on POF.) Surely an intelligent, well-educated man such as yourself must realize not using the body type filter leads to wasted time under such circumstances.
---------------
I dated on okc, not here. The body type filter was available as a paid upgrade and it didn't work as it was supposed to, but that really made no difference. I only contacted women who showed up as being online, so there were never a zillion women to wade through. That eliminated the inefficiency associated with sending messages to women who rarely or never log in. Given that your own method of finding a date has an efficiency of zero, no suggestion at all could be less efficient than what you are doing.

-------------
Imagine if you dedicated exactly 30 minutes to POF every day, and it takes 2 minutes to click on a profile, skim it and message it. At most you could contact 15 women. But what if half the population is overweight (not far off from reality for Dallas) and you only date fellow athletic women?
--------------
Half would be generous, but since it's pretty easy to tell a woman is overweight from just about any photo she has posted (assuming she was overweight when it was taken), why would I even click on those profiles?

------------
Without the body type filter, 50% of your search returns are going to be pointless.
------------
Maybe most people just aren't that smart, but my search results returned women based on age and being online now. Scanning down a page of photos for women I could potentially find attractive did not seem to be all that mentally taxing nor consume more than maybe one second per photo to decide no or possibly yes.

--------------
You'd be reduced to 7 or 8 women maximum that you could contact in 30 minutes, possibly leading you to missing out on your dream girl, who could have been 9th had you made it to her.
-------------
There is no such thing as a "dream girl," except in dreams where you can imagine people who don't really exist. When I meet someone I am interested in, I don't need to keep looking for the next best thing. My ego doesn't depend on living through someone else, so, if I find a woman attractive, intelligent and we get along, why would I need to dream about someone else? People who need more than that, are just looking for someone to live through because they are themselves, boring.

---------------
What would be the purpose of including 6 foot tall women in my searches? There is a near zero percent chance they are going to respond, so there is a near zero percent chance I’m going to use valuable time messaging them. Clicking on a 6 foot tall woman’s profile is just several seconds I could have used to click on the profile of a woman I actually do have a (remote) chance with.
-------------
Then you like rockhead trucker, should just shoot yourself , since you have already assumed you won't get a date and you would rather troll about your woes and ignore everything anyone suggests over actually doing anything that might land you a date.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 399
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/17/2015 8:30:14 AM
funny, I always used to refer to them as dance clubs, to avoid being confused with old men clubs where they sat around in paneled rooms enjoy cigars, et cetera. Certainly never had the flash of Tom up there. just like in advertising, flash and swagger gets attention to the product. The only time I ever got noticed for dancing was at a wedding, and it was married women coming up to say they had permission from their husbands to have one dance with me. i'm just hopeless :) lol

Wouldn't mind doing the dance club thing again, it was fun back then to be out until 2am closing time and then go find a diner that was still open. But around here, ya gotta read the newspaper to avoid the ones that seem to have a gunshot popped off every now and then :(

damn kids. its like street racing, in the old days people may at worst, have a baseball bat in the trunk to settle things. now all the kids have to be packin'
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 400
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/17/2015 8:52:03 AM
I can relate GTO.

at every class reunion male classmates would dump their wives on me to dance.
my female classmates would say "My husband (or BF) says it's ok to dance with you." *oh how nice oh him*

I wasn't happy about it but I bit my tongue, smiled and said OK.

but I thought it was lame of them to pawn them off on me because of their lack of dancing skill or uninterest.

for the guys - in my head I was asking them "Do you want me to f..k her tonight as well?"
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