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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 101
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.Page 5 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)

Anyone in here who is 'A Few Extra Pounds' or 'BBW' gets ignored and turned away constantly.


Not true, I am "A Few Extra Pounds" and I'm not ignored, I get messages every single day. I have 2 date proposals and back up plans with friends for those 2 dates, in the event they do not follow up/confirm. And I only started being active in OLD 2-3 days ago, my profile was hidden prior to that.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 6/22/2012
Msg: 102
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 12:23:37 PM

Anyone in here who is 'A Few Extra Pounds' or 'BBW' gets ignored and turned away constantly.


Well the average female in the United States now weighs 160 lbs. Considering that 5 ft 4 is the average height for a woman, that is overweight.

The effect of choosing a body type 'BBW' or 'A Few Extra Pounds' in online dating has no relevance to the truth. People screen out those choices regardless of the math. That was my point. Unless you make those choices (or HAVE to depending on your stature) you're never going to know the true impact of being ignored simply from a profile choice. That discrimination stays invisible unless you experience it for yourself.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 103
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 12:47:01 PM
SweetD - they are because they are approaching me only because I am tall, and then making jokes about my height -
nothing ISM about it, unless you count azzhatism
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 104
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 1:01:25 PM

I'd think you were lying on your profile about your height, NG,

Nah, he looks pretty tall, and if he was lying he would just go 6' 0" even, probably.



due to your over concern about ...ah ....me and what I think.


LOL....NG writes dissertations about what concerns almost everyone and about what what they think! I commissioned him to write one about my cat!
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 105
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 1:14:30 PM
I know, he's a needler, analyzing every possible scenario.

I would like for him to give the comparison of the Princess Bride and Kill Bill and how these scenarios relate to each other and how has possibly affected people's mental state who have watched them. Just for kicks. haha
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 106
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 1:20:39 PM

Who's analogy is illogical and wacky?

Yours. That you equate "nasty" to shorter men.

Why are you so concerned as to why my preferences are they way they are?

The thread topic is about people's preferences and on what's sound and what's outlandish. No reason to be defensive. It's just a really outlandish, wacky Judgment on others... whether it's a tall guy, muscular guy, short guy, tan guy, or a guy of one color or the next.

I don't think all shorter men have abusive behavior, I said, SOME.

You said:

I'm sure other women don't equate "nasty" to shorter men. BUT IT DOES TO ME NOW.

You equate "nasty" to shorter guys. You can't change my mind. :)

if he was lying he would just go 6' 0" even, probably.

Yeah, why stop at 5'11"? I criticize those who have character Judgments on those who are too short (or too tall)... and also that shorter guys should Expect gals who are taller than he in her heels not to be attracted. I chuckle at the double-standard though -- it stems from the eye-rolling concept of "Women aren't that into looks".

NG writes dissertations about what concerns almost everyone and about what what they think!

No dissertation needed -- she said what she thinks outright! (But I will write a dissertation on anything regardless...)

I commissioned him to write one about my cat!

I'm sensing.... I'm sensing.... Your cat likes tuna, am I right? Likes to be petted, notably with the right people it's familiar with. Scratching it with your nails along it's spine and down it's tail will get it jumpy, giving it a funny feeling, but may also like it once it gets familiar -- or be kinda combative in response. Your cat likes treats. It also sheds, too. Sometimes you will hear it make a unique noise as if there's a small little engine inside running at a rhythmic pace, known as purring! Oh, it doesn't like short cats. Or big cats. Or cats that smoke. It doesn't like any other cats it may come in contact with either. :)
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 107
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 1:45:05 PM


and yes, height does too have to do with some men's behavior. I've seen it. Time and time again. It's just easier to not put myself in harms way anymore by avoiding that characteristic. Simple. It keeps me safer. I only have to worry about abusive taller men, which there are plenty. So actually I am cutting my odds of running into an abusive man by cutting out that characteristic that has left a sour taste in my mouth.


Do I really need to list the heights of every athlete who has been convicted/accused/involved in and of domestic abuse and sexual assault cases?



This is just a generalization from bad experience(s). You are just as likely to see tall men that are jerks, abusive etc. The difference is these negative personality traits often aren't linked to a tall man's height.


My biological grandfather was over 6'2" but physically and emotionally abusive towards my Grandmother when she was younger, he was drug addict and a criminal. If you're a destructive person then it doesn't matter what height you are. I've never liked generalizations because far too often the people who generalize are willing to ignore the same faults in a group of people they do like.

IE: Chick: "I'll never date black men, they're**** ***holes, who only care about sex and they're never faithful.

Chick goes on to date a white guy who's an**** ***hole, who constantly cheats on her and only using her for sex. Chick dates another white guy who exhibits the same personality over and over again.




I don't think all shorter men have abusive behavior, I said, SOME


That's not what you said initially at all.





Not true, I am "A Few Extra Pounds" and I'm not ignored, I get messages every single day. I have 2 date proposals and back up plans with friends for those 2 dates, in the event they do not follow up/confirm. And I only started being active in OLD 2-3 days ago, my profile was hidden prior to that.


People try to equate a woman's weight to a man's height but the truth is a lot of men aren't stickler's for weight like some women are for height just from a cultural perspective we're taught not to make fun of someone's weight and not to "fat shame" but shortness is fair game unless they're dwarfs then that would just be wrong.

But I can see why a short guy would be frustrated to be excluded simply because you're short something you don't have much control over has to be annoying but at the same time, I'm black, girls exclude me all the time over something I don't have control over.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 108
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 2:15:38 PM
OMG, I'm not even going to read all yer comments, disparaging men garbage. boo hoo, goo goo....

I replied to sealady whom mentioned Nasty first. Fvck off.


Peas, whilst I also agree that 'short man syndrome' does exist. I do not think height and nastiness have a causal link.


I did not say ALL men.

How the fvck do you get "black men" outta short men? Whoa.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 109
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 2:49:00 PM

How the fvck do you get "black men" outta short men? Whoa.


I got this one.... It's easy.........

They say being born Short is like being Born Black......

Cause it's outside their Control.........
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/13/2015
Msg: 110
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 2:53:58 PM

People try to equate a woman's weight to a man's height but the truth is a lot of men aren't stickler's for weight like some women are for height


True, a lot of BBWs don't have trouble getting a date. Obviously men are more lenient regarding weight. The average American and Canadian woman is overweight yet they still have a dating life. If men were sticklers for weight the majority of North American women would have a very difficult time dating- but a lot claim they don't. Women are so stubborn they won't consider dating anybody under an inch of their standard.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 111
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:09:20 PM
So are the short Men here complaining willing to tall a tall, morbdily obese woman ( out of her control and all) Hardly.
I don't think I've given a flying fuk about being tall since I was 9, no picnic I assume you growing up - I should start a thread!
"Filthy rich Rock Stars refuse to date me because I am 1/4 taller than they are" uhhuh. Only reason
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 112
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:26:14 PM
Oh for goodness sakes! Anyone who wants to be tall come to my house!

I have a couple of hundred pairs of 4-5 in. heels to spare!

All colors and styles, Gentlemen!

Seriously.....if it bothers you so much....get lifts....it's what I am going to do to my well...you know. ;)
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/13/2015
Msg: 113
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:31:10 PM

Seriously.....if it bothers you so much....get lifts....it's what I am going to do to my well...you know. ;)


There was already a thread about that.

https://forums.plentyoffish.com/15559525datingPostpage9.aspx
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 114
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:34:04 PM
So do it and quit whining!

Or accept yourself for who you are....blaming others and crying about the unfairness of life is not going to make you grow taller.....you will only appear smaller in the eyes of others. :)
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 115
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:37:13 PM

Women are so stubborn they won't consider dating anybody under an inch of their standard.


Which isn't a problem I suppose unless you're the one an inch too short?

Is this height issue depicted in some ancient cave dating back ages .....I can see the drawings on the cave wall now...short stick man walks up to taller stick woman, they grunt at each other a second and short stick man walks off head hanging and a mastadon steps on his whiney stick body.

If you're going to be concerned about an inch...
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 116
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:37:19 PM

Oh for goodness sakes! Anyone who wants to be tall come to my house!


On my way..but not for the lifts!
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 117
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:40:50 PM

I'm sure other women don't equate "nasty" to shorter men. BUT IT DOES TO ME NOW.


I had ugly experiences with a short guy…he was the shortest guy I ever “dated;” approximately eye to eye with me. He was a pathological liar, a drama queen, and it took police intervention to get him to leave me alone. My ex-husband was also about 5’7”, claimed to be taller, and I had experiences with him similar to yours.

NG, it’s not your place to judge anyone’s choices to be “outlandish,” or anything else.


But I can see why a short guy would be frustrated to be excluded simply because you're short something you don't have much control over has to be annoying


Short guys can claim that’s why they’re rejected but probably it has something to do with that entitlement thing; because they have no control over it, women (or “chicks”) should overlook it.

Why would a short man want to be with a woman who doesn’t like short men?? Makes no sense.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/13/2015
Msg: 118
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 3:47:36 PM

Here's what: One summer in my thirties I dated this guy with a really caristhmatic (sp?) personality. He also happened to be a musician and would compose his own music. (He had a truly beautiful voice, but that's beside the point.) One time he was playing and singing a song he'd written and the lyrics said something about his being five foot four. Before that I hadn't noticed that he was shorter than me. Naturally, I didn't care. But later, with online dating, I found that when someone's profile would appeal to me I wouldn't message him if he was under 5'11". I wonder how common it is for people to lose sight of what they really care about due to the mechanisms of online dating?


According to the OP in real life she was willing to give the shorter guy a chance, but all that changed when it came to OLD. I can say as a man I don't have a strict cut off for weight in online dating. I think it would be silly for me to overlook a woman who's 5 lbs overweight but fits my criteria in every other way.
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 119
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:02:02 PM
And here are the key words.... Mr. Rose....


"but fits my criteria in every other way."

Everyone has a right to their own "criteria".....whatever that may be or however silly you may believe it to be. :)


And Joey? You are incorrigible! ;)
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 120
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:11:40 PM
Some women will date short men.
Some men will date fat women.
NG writes disertations.
KJ has plenty of shoes.
No one likes to date a liar.
Personally, I choose to not date blondes and men with dark brown eyes.

ETA: (below) What's the best way to incorrage you, Joe?
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 121
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:11:59 PM

And Joey? You are incorrigible! ;)



Incorrigible? Incorrigible..I like the sound of that!
I might be bad but i'm perfectly good at it! ;)

ETA:below-


ETA: (below) What's the best way to incorrage you, Joe?


Don't know. Apparently, KJ thinks it isn't possible. But I have hope, just no pain please!
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 122
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:18:55 PM
Many have an aversion to someone or something that hurt them in some way. I get that and fully understand. I think those that have an aversion, like a dislike for short guys, know logically not to paint all with the same brush and they even know logically that they may get over this...until they get over it or IF they get over it...who cares. It's their life. I know I can't convince them otherwise, nor is that my job, so, I'll just STFU because it's no skin off my butt who they will or won't date.

NG, do you always have to suck the marrow from the bone? Fvck, why is everything a boring thesis?

And no one can force me to eat broccoli.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 123
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:32:13 PM
*sniff* There should be more women like 5'11" Nicole Kidman divorcing 5'7" Tom Cruise and going for the same height, 5'11" Brad Pitts in the world. lol That would not make the 5'7" Angelina's very happy at all.
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 124
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Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:43:50 PM


I got this one.... It's easy.........

They say being born Short is like being Born Black......

Cause it's outside their Control.........


Yea I really don't see how that was hard to understand at all.




Short guys can claim that’s why they’re rejected but probably it has something to do with that entitlement thing; because they have no control over it, women (or “chicks”) should overlook it.

Why would a short man want to be with a woman who doesn’t like short men?? Makes no sense.




So are the short Men here complaining willing to tall a tall, morbdily obese woman ( out of her control and all) Hardly.
I don't think I've given a flying fuk about being tall since I wtheas 9, no picnic I assume you growing up - I should start a thread!
"Filthy rich Rock Stars refuse to date me because I am 1/4 taller than they are" uhhuh. Only reason


Tall women are pretty desirable though, you're 5'10" so it's not like you're unusually tall and there are a lot of models and actresses who are over 5'9" Stacy Keibler is 5'11" and I can't imagine any man not finding her attractive

I'm looking at it from both sides since I'm 5'9" the epitome of average (though some women will say that's short for them too) I really don't have a dog in the fight, I'm coming from a guy's perspective for the most part. I've been rejected multiple times and that feeling sucks. So while apart of me wants to say "Just suck it up, I'm sure you still attract women" apart of me also empathizes. Really in the end all people really want is companionship, a relationship someone that gives a shit about them so if you're a short guy and you're told that you're not desirable to most women then it's gotta be a kick in the balls.
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 125
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 4:59:13 PM
"I've been rejected multiple times and that feeling sucks"



Yes it does! I can totally emphasize!

I was rejected quite recently....by the adorable Mr. Hawking.

I think it was because I was too tall! :(
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