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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 126
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.Page 6 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
You're not undesirable. Jeeze.
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 127
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:23:59 PM

Some women will date short men.
Some men will date fat women.
NG writes disertations.
KJ has plenty of shoes.
No one likes to date a liar.


Excellent recap - this person should be chairing these meetings.

Except I wish to add that some people are addicted to dating liars. Maybe because it's what they're familiar with? Or maybe they don't like reality, but only like things that are too good to be true?

Also, in all fairness, every once in awhile the Norwegian says something freaking hilarious.

ALSO I feel that when someone avoids a certain characteristic in others because that characteristic has been strongly associated with a trauma they've experienced, it's qualitatively different from something they simply don't find attractive.

I have spoken.
 Moderate_Recall
Joined: 3/1/2015
Msg: 128
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:30:59 PM

when someone avoids a certain characteristic in others because that characteristic has been strongly associated with a trauma they've experienced, it's qualitatively different from something they simply don't find attractive.


Many people would avoid someone who sticks their neck out that far. Not fair to the short necked humans on here...
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 129
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:40:46 PM
I stopped reading NG - I think he is fun and erudite but goddamn it is like here is a novella about a comma.
No trauma from short guys, just annoying to have them say their idiot lines, I want to set them aflame but I just give them my
death stare.
About same results
If I was single I would bang a confident shorter than me Man to ER
but hey Sunshine, followed by a vulgar remark, no
The air btw, is FINE. Like that line hasn't died a wicked death
And no, we aren't the same height laying down.
Sheesh
Here we worry about 4th world countries when we should be funding
" Save the short Man fund" Right now a short Man wants a date, lets help him get it be sending your help
For only pennies a day, the cost of a latte you too could put a smile on that face, blah blah
Some Men are short, some women are tall
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 5/6/2015
Msg: 130
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:50:41 PM
^ What the hell is "ER"? And the guy above you just made a mockery of my entire species - give him your death stare!
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 131
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:52:04 PM
No! No! No! Mr. Blackwood! I am not too cool for him.

For me....it was as if the World stopped when my eyes met his! And when he so gallantly expressed concern about my chosen footwear and the distance we would traverse on our fateful night.....the emotions that filled my heart were not of my volition!

Imagine my heartbreak when I looked at him with eyes shining filled with hope and asked with a heart bursting with joy to express our love with matching tattoos. ..and he unceremoniously said.....no. That was it....nothing more.

I hid my devastation and did the only rightly thing I could do....I soldiered on to the fetish club....where I met the 7 ft tall next love of my life that made me feel small!

So you see...whether you are small and want to be tall or tall and want to be small there is someone who will make you feel small or tall and...... some...... nothing at all.

Isn't life grand? :D
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 132
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:52:13 PM

And the guy above you just made a mockery of my entire species - give him your death stare!


Yeah, but I'll bet nobody asks you if can deep throat. So you got that goin' for you.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 133
all the short men are say-ying is...give Peas a channnnce
Posted: 8/4/2015 5:54:13 PM
Peas is welcome to chase after whatever fellow she likes. We all enjoy what we like. If it turns out she misses a knight in shining armor, well, bully for the woman who does get him. Everyone else can date who they end up with.

Broccoli is like sex--if you were forced to have it as a kid, you likely have an issue with it now.

why do some people date liars? they may have fallen for the BS. some actually...lie themselves. I can think of one person here who lied about height and health issues, who complains about men lying. we enjoy what we like, and sometimes what we like is...to feel comfortable about ourselves.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/13/2015
Msg: 134
all the short men are say-ying is...give Peas a channnnce
Posted: 8/4/2015 6:15:46 PM

And here are the key words.... Mr. Rose....


"but fits my criteria in every other way."

Everyone has a right to their own "criteria".....whatever that may be or however silly you may believe it to be. :)


I never said people don't have a right to their own criteria.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 135
all the short men are say-ying is...give Peas a channnnce
Posted: 8/4/2015 7:01:30 PM

I never said people don't have a right to their own criteria.


Sure you did......let's just substitute the word criteria with standard.


Women are so stubborn they won't consider dating anybody under an inch of their standard.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 136
view profile
History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 7:33:37 PM

So are the short Men here complaining willing to tall a tall, morbdily obese woman ( out of her control and all)

The tallness she can't control -- the obese part she can. I think every guy, including short guys, will be willing to go out on a date with a tall gal. "No, man, she's sexy as hell, but, she's one of the taller ones. I can't do it." The only time you'll hear that is when he's lying because he was shot down. :) The morbidly obese part? Her height isn't going to be factor, aside from safety reasons when combined with that obesity.

Seriously.....if it bothers you so much....get lifts....

From the posts I read, nobody's upset about being short. It's about placing character judgments about it like any other physical attribute, thinking it somehow isn't about looks, or wanting desiring a massive height differential in comparison.

I replied to sealady whom mentioned Nasty first. Fvck off.

Easy! I'm not short, so I'm not nasty! I'm one of the good guys! ;)

NG, it’s not your place to judge anyone’s choices to be “outlandish,” or anything else.

It was her judgment on people that was called outlandish -- not a taste. So yes, we all can call someone's judgments out as good, bad, or indifferent.

Why would a short man want to be with a woman who doesn’t like short men?? Makes no sense.

Hey, it's not your place to judge anyone's choices! ;) I agree -- they shouldn't. But that's not what's being claimed by anyone... unless I'm missing a post, there's not a "I'm short and I want Sally but she doesn't like short guys, what do I do?" There's a lot of straw man arguments in the thread...

NG, do you always have to suck the marrow from the bone?

Only with salt!
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 137
view profile
History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 7:37:44 PM

Well the average female in the United States now weighs 160 lbs. Considering that 5 ft 4 is the average height for a woman, that is overweight. 160 lbs is a healthy weight for somebody of my height - 5 ft 10. If an American male wants a woman who's not overweight he is going to have limited options.


I believe it. And I've been told that I'm too picky, I don't want an overweight woman. And the reason I don't, is that overweight women do not excite me sexually. I know there's exceptions, because I've seen them. But I would rather remain dateless than to give an overweight women the wrong idea, that I'm interested. I happen to be very close to being the ideal weight for my size. By chance, my knees choose to hate me after I gain about 10 more pounds.

I just checked, only 5% of the male population is taller than me. So, if I'm that much of of a novelty height, then I'll wait for the slimmer woman. I'm patient, I can do that.
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 138
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 7:58:48 PM

On my way..but not for the lifts!


I came, I saw, I conquered

I saw KJ online, swiftly proposed we meet, teased her for two months, and got on a plane and saw her, quite charming I must say.

Na na na na na *sticking tongue out*

Talk is cheap *muttley laugh*
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 139
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 8:12:15 PM
Veni, Vidi, volo in domum redire.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 140
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/4/2015 8:46:56 PM
<----Peas wuz here. .....................x
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 141
all the short men are say-ying is...give Peas a channnnce
Posted: 8/4/2015 9:42:18 PM
* Peas is welcome to chase after whatever fellow she likes. We all enjoy what we like.*

Exactly! Me, I come from a tall athletic family. My parents actually met on the mountain hiking team in college. So yes, I like tall athletic guys. I do see however that a lot of other people like them too and the competition is looking rough. Oh well... still like them.
 ThePigIsHereForEternity
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 142
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 3:02:18 AM


You're too cool for Hawking, if you didn't know that he has the stats and numbers to back up why you would reject him anyway, you see he's a black nerd and he never fits in because he's too smart for the other dumbass black people out there again if you didn't know that he's got the stats to back it up.


I met Hawking back in June, and honestly, I was expecting him to be anti-social and negative. I figured we would have to attempt to force him to be social, but it turned out we didn't. His online persona didn't match his offline one, but in a good way. Having said that, I still think he may need to believe in himself a bit more. I think POF has poisoned his mindset, honestly.



Imagine my heartbreak when I looked at him with eyes shining filled with hope and asked with a heart bursting with joy to express our love with matching tattoos


I'll say it again, little girl....you would be crying before the needle even touched you, and of course, I'd laugh. :)
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 143
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 6:18:01 AM

when someone avoids a certain characteristic in others because that characteristic has been strongly associated with a trauma they've experienced, it's qualitatively different from something they simply don't find attractive.


Not being physically attracted to a certain group is one thing. However when a person makes generalizations about an entire group based on a few bad experiences, then I will disagree and state why.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 144
view profile
History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 7:02:58 AM
What is this madness I’ve been dragged into?

On the original topic, I’ve actually sent women messages pointing out problematic errors in their profile. A few months ago, there was a woman who mentioned working on her Ph.D in her profile text, yet her “Education” section said “High School,” and it was pretty obvious from her writing style that she was extremely well-educated, so I sent her a message explaining that if she didn’t fix that error, she would be left out of the searches of men looking for women with college degrees. She wrote back with appreciation and had fixed the error by the time I saw the message. In the old days, I probably would have responded again to see what happened, but she basically said nothing but “Thanks” (in a sentence or two), which was my clue not to bother, and it was also pretty obvious she was out of my league, and as you’re about to see, I was on a descent at that point so I just let it go... Point is, I’m not going to point out an error in a profile unless it’s a case like that, and in each instance, the woman has responded positively for the help. But if you're basically giving people unsolicited profile reviews, criticizing them for every spelling error and whatnot, you're just asking for trouble.

KJ: Why are you messing with these people’s minds?

“if you didn't know that he has the stats and numbers to back up why you would reject him anyway, you see he's a black nerd and he never fits in because he's too smart for the other dumbass black people out there again if you didn't know that he's got the stats to back it up.”

This seems pretty accurate.

“I met Hawking back in June, and honestly, I was expecting him to be anti-social and negative. I figured we would have to attempt to force him to be social, but it turned out we didn't. His online persona didn't match his offline one, but in a good way. Having said that, I still think he may need to believe in himself a bit more. I think POF has poisoned his mindset, honestly.”

This seems pretty accurate, except for the last sentence. Although, that depends on whether you’re talking about POF the dating site or POF the forums. As a veteran of many message boards prior to POF’s existence, I was fairly well poisoned before I ever logged onto this place. I’m rarely surprised by anything that plays out here because we’re all just retreads of the same lame characters that exist on every message board, constantly regurgitating recycled plots, like the 50th “All in the Family” wannabe on network TV. And certainly none of the negative things women say on here about men in general or me specifically is anything new to me (though I will say, this board is much more negative than what I run into in real life [post-Alabama], but it is NOT more negative than any other message board, including those I frequented prior to POF -- message boards are the ultimate filth of the internet, more perverse than porn sites).

But if you’re talking about the dating site... I agree. Although I was also a veteran of being rejected long before POF, my tenure on this site has coincided with the longest dateless streak of my life (not counting the first 24 years), with POF contributing to probably over 80% of the rejections during that time, so, yeah, I don’t care how accustomed you become to rejection, numbers like those start piling on top of you, eventually smothering you, leading to psychosis in those final moments as your oxygen-deprived brain begins producing all sorts of wild hallucinations and civility leaves your psychological makeup. 1000+ rejections in April alone... no unsolicited views since March... just a massive amount of weight.

I finally hit a wall. I haven’t sent a message in weeks on any site. I just can’t do it anymore. Not so much the rejections... they just roll off the back... just another drop in an infinite ocean with no horizons... it’s the 1 in a hundred responses. I just have absolutely no enthusiasm for dealing with them anymore, no matter what she looks like or what kind of personality she has. I’ve started SO MANY dialogues throughout the decades that have gone absolutely nowhere... around and around in circles until they go down the drain into the abyss. I can’t stomach the thought of spending weeks, months, years again trying to convince some woman that I probably don’t even like that I’m worth meeting, that I’m worth her time, that I’m somehow better than all the other guys interested in her, that I deserve a relationship with her, that I deserve her love, that I’m a human being, that I have thoughts, feelings, history, a meaningful existence... just jumping through hoops like a trained dog over and over and over again, wondering why I don’t get treats anymore...

Yes, in that sense, POF has certainly contributed a fair amount of toxins to my disorder. But the only real difference between it and Match, eH, OKC, Tinder and real life at this point is the sheer magnitude (due to it being free, with a large population of possibilities and much older than Tinder), because they're all 100% failure as of late (i.e., 9 years).
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 145
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 7:20:44 AM
Mr. Hawking....it is time to recognize that while although the supporting role you cast yourself into is rewarding, important and comforting.....perhaps, it is time to play the greatest and most fulfilling one to date....the lead.....after all...it is your story.


All my best.....always. :D
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 146
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 7:27:56 AM
^^^^

He totally put his hands on a woman, he reached out at her arm and sorta swiped/grabbed her and pulled her in. I thought that was bold (I also thought she would smack him, and had my hands ready to block it from happening), but it turned out that it was a friend of his :-(

I kept thinking, if he were to do that to other woman (risking being slapped), would his odds improve? I know I would at least think it bold enough that I'd accept a conversation. Things of the sort are admired in NYC (the whole "having balls" concept), maybe not so much in FL?
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 147
view profile
History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 8:01:55 AM

Rating system for social boldness or as we call it having a set of big kahunas:


Grabbing gals attention=1 pt

Grabbing gals arm and pulling her to you= 2 pt

Pulling to dance floor= 3 pt

Grabbing gals ass= 4 pt

Grabbing and making out= 5 pt

If you cant get 4 pt's per night it is time to call it quits! That is the min. score... NYC style.

If she does any of those things to you 1st, you lose points for her being the one with big kahunas, but you will enjoy losing in this case!
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 148
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 8:05:29 AM
To live in Tampa and send emails for years when this area may be THE hotbed for Fishmeets in the entire country...

???

One of the Fishmeet "regulars" here can't be more than 5'4"/possibly only 5'2" and is always in high demand with the ladies simply because he can/will dance. If dancing with a "strange" woman isn't an easy icebreaker, then I don't know what is.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/13/2015
Msg: 149
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 8:33:19 AM

I never said people don't have a right to their own criteria.


Sure you did......let's just substitute the word criteria with standard.


Women are so stubborn they won't consider dating anybody under an inch of their standard.


I said women are sticklers for height- I never said they don't have a right to do so. I also said men are more flexible on a woman's weight because the average North American woman is overweight yet many do not have a problem getting a date.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 150
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History
Profile errors, height, values, and the kitchen sink.
Posted: 8/5/2015 8:56:21 AM
KJ: This isn’t one of my productions. I’m not in charge of casting. I can either take the role I’m given or not be in the production at all. That’s pretty much the mantra for most women in these forums about men, is it not?

“I know I would at least think it bold enough that I'd accept a conversation.”

You know, I don’t profess to be some sort of expert in the female psyche’, but nevertheless I’m going to guess that your supposed reaction to such behavior would be extremely rare among womankind indeed. I’m less concerned about the slap possibility (or beatings, or boyfriend interventions, or arrests) than I am about contributing to the culture of paranoia and stereotypes that the typical woman cultivates from such aggressive male behavior. Even if I don’t get slapped, thirty seconds later it’s going to be, “Did you see that black guy grab me?” or “Did you see that dwarf with a Napoleon complex grab me?” or “Oh, my God, let’s get out of here and never come back – every guy in here is trying to grab me!” Not to mention, I don’t like causing people discomfort. Unless they’re bullies. Then ripping their organs out through their anuses is too good for them.

“but it turned out that it was a friend of his”

“friend” is a strong word. I didn’t even know her name – I had to ask her parents what it was the next time I saw them. But, yeah, we had met dozens of times before that. Mostly when she was like 10.

“To live in Tampa and send emails for years when this area may be THE hotbed for Fishmeets in the entire country...”

I can only recall one meet invitation during the past 8 years with more than a couple of women signed up who were less than about 45. (That meet I did sign up for and it was cancelled.) This is a VERY old skewing market, as I’m sure you’re aware of. Not that POF Fishmeets aren’t old-skewing everywhere, but Tampa is literally the oldest skewing large market in the U.S. And remember, I was much younger when I started on this site... and yet STILL haven't gotten old enough that I would be among peers at a POF event. Maybe in 20 years.

This past weekend I was promoting my movie at ComicCon, which I discovered had a very young-skewing “Nerd Speed Dating Event,” and I would guess most of the female participants would be extremely aggressive and open-minded, based on my observations on the crowd in general -- women with such personalities are the ones I've done the best with. I would have participated, despite my current state of mind, but unfortunately it coincided with my mother being in town for a very rare visit, and the speed dating was at night (I didn’t discover its existence until I was already there); I had already scheduled dinner with my mother and she was leaving too soon to reschedule. I mean, she’s nearly 80 – every time I see her could be the last. I would say there’s always next year for Nerd Speed Dating, but I doubt there will be a next year.
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