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 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 41
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Local phenomena or site-wide?Page 4 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
^^^^LOL-- you copied and pasted your whole argument here.... So who WON?


Most of our revenue is from tourism.


I would re- check that if I was you, I think it isn't even in the top 5 list of sources. :P



you'll worry when you're favorite spot becomes a McDonald's or a Starbucks


He's right to a point. In the ghetto that is influenced by economics like the projects maybe it is a good thing, like you said. But in the ethnic enclaves( In a way ghetto's based on ethnicity, which will never change) it isn't a good thing. Many of these areas are already ful affluent residents(Brighton Beach, Sheepsheadbay, Bensonhurst) but the high rents make it so only chain stores can afford the rent or the chains are buying out the little stores. They can accept even profit losses to a certain extent , at 1st.

What happens is we lose places we like(the Turkish-Italian cafe) to get a stupid Starbucks( 1 just opened across the street). They aren't coming here to give us better food or anything of quality, they are coming because they see the economic demographics and feel they can profit in the end because we have no other place to go to!


no loud blaring music playing by cars passing by nor neighborhood.



Actually the ORANGE people started doing that, A.K.A Guido's. It was an 80's & 90's thing!



Your best bet is to hope that you live in a rent stabilized apartment

Yes looking forward to my 0% rent increase. I like hearing how much those trust fund hipster liberals , who are supported by daddy, b!tch about their rents..lmao!


and the landlord has no intention of selling the building.


You just have to hope he doesn't hire hit men to come in and kill everyone or burn the building down. I sleep with one eye open!
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 42
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Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/20/2015 6:56:11 PM

Conversations about race, socioeconomics, (and other topics) are very difficult to have with people who are very dissimilar to one's own racial/ethic identity or socioeconomic background, because experiences greatly differ. There's no way to circumvent certain conversations, they naturally come up because everyone has a different upbringing. I do not like limitations, and if there are things I cannot talk about with people, I'm likely not going to associate with them. When people are too focused on race, and they project their issues onto others, I'm automatically turned off. The only people who ask what my racial/ethnicity is are Black people, I find that very interesting. Not a single White person has ever asked me, they are simply not interested or curious. Just on that principle, who you think I'm more likely to gravitate toward, the people obsessed with pegging into a specific quadrant, or people who can forgo the identification process and simply be a human being to another? Granted, this is not everyone's experience, but it is mine.


On my Facebook timeline I see a shit ton of Confederate flag supporters making pseudo racist comments, blaming Obama, Liberals, gays and minorities for everything people who I actually thought were cool and people I considered friends. Every group thinks they get unfairly treated. Some of the top 1% of the 1% believes they're being scrutinzed, men's rights activists are upset that people have the audacity to treat women equally.

I've dated a shit ton of girls outside of my race, I've probably dated more white women than black women for no particular reason other than demographics being the way they are and I've never had racial discussions with them, it's not something that comes up in everyday conversation. I think I attracted quite a few chicks because I am black.



Stating a racial requirement might be common in more diverse areas. Where people are more likely to get emails from other races and have more personal experience with other races. Besides if someone is a racist because of what they hear / see in the media, then they could be naive or gullible.


I live in a diverse area in which it's common to see interracial couples I haven't seen many profiles asking "Black men need not to apply" I was stationed in Oregon which doesn't have a black population so the idea of excluding black men never came across any chick's mind there. Like I said I probably attracted women simply because I am black, I definitely wasn't a local so I either had to be military or doing something interesting.

As for racism if people are racist because of the media influence then they're going to be racist period. If it doesn't take that much to make them hate someone of a different race then there wasn't any hope for them at all. I don't think Dylan Roof's parents were racist but it didn't take much for him to be drawn to white supremacist groups. An socially withdrawn ***hole, who didn't have any true ambitions, filled with hate in his heart so hateful he killed a bunch of innocent people in a church even after being proven wrong about his racist beliefs.

I grew up a military brat in diverse areas around a bunch of diverse kids, it's one of the perks of growing up in that lifestyle, yes moving around a lot sucks after making friends but meeting and befriending people of different backgrounds helps a lot when you become an adult.

There's a time and place for racial discussions but I also think that there are people who overly sensitive when it comes to that as if they don't want to believe that racial disparities in the US don't exist while claiming that the liberal media wants to talk about race in order to divide without a hint of irony in their words.

At the end of the day there are going to be women who want me and find me attractive and women't who don't, I can't worry about it, I would love to attract every single woman on POF but that's not going to happen so I'll just have to continue doing what I do. I can't worry about the girls who don't want me, it's futile. Just don't bullshit me after the fact.

Don't type "Black men need not apply" but then send me a message saying "I saw you visit my profile what's up?" You felt strongly enough to exclude black men but since you think I'm cute you'll make an exception for little ole me. It just makes you look shallow.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 43
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/20/2015 7:47:23 PM

I'm still trying to figure out how can people be friends with those they otherwise despise? I've had to unfollow many people because they are constantly posting articles that express hate toward white people, while I don't see any white person (on my timeline or theirs) posting articles about hating Black people, not even one.


I have seen plenty of anti-black comments on Facebook, Twitter, comments section of youtube and online articles etc. Sometimes even when the article or video has nothing to do race.
 Xray86
Joined: 5/12/2015
Msg: 44
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/20/2015 7:54:34 PM
Excuse my absence, I was working all weekend. Let's get a few things straight. At no point in my profile or my opening post did I ever say that a woman owes me anything. I don't know where some of you get that idea about me, but that's the kind of assumption that I encounter all the time in my area. If you don't know for sure, don't lump me in the same category as other men. To answer a prior post, I'm quite fine with interracial relations and I don't care who pairs up. Don't know what gave that impression. And no, I'm not asking why these women don't want me and I click next just as well as anyone else. I'm asking if this attitude is local or site-wide. So far it seems to be a combination based on what others have said. And finally, those so-called "preferences" on my profile are what I like. They are NOT requirements and I've had to clarify based on feedback. I like a princess who can fight but I get along just fine with any other persona.

Now that I got that out of the way, let me present something that I don't think most people consider regarding these racial "preferences." I'm mixed. I'm Black (Ibo), Cherokee, and White (various Anglo-Saxon, Germanic, and Slavic groups). My heritage and identity are fully established. When I see or hear people talk about excluding entire groups of people and including others, who are they actually talking about? If they say no Blacks but Whites are fine, where do I fit? I'm both, so you're including and excluding me. Now if you mean you have to be one hundred percent, who would that be and how? Take White. Do you mean Anglo, German, Spaniard, Mediterranean, Baltic, or any combination? And if European, do you also include Indo-Europeans like Persians or Indians? What about Blacks? American, Caribbean, Brazilian, African, Aborigine? Who are we talking about? Sub-groups or anyone who's at least one sixteenth? And what about Hispanics and Asians? Where do they fall if you say no Blacks? I'm not stupid, I already know where those groups fall and it's not with Whites.

Cultural reasons are valid for exclusions as long as they're not based upon stereotypes and reasonable. My cultural relevance would be German, Mormon, and U.S. military. I wouldn't think I have much in common culturally with a (moderate) Muslim woman. Though that wouldn't stop me knowing how I am. If you have two Mormons, one Black and the other White and they're both from Salt Lake City, how can one say no to the other and exclude his or her entire ethnicity and cite "cultural" reasons? They're both the same.

I have no interest in anyone who feel they can exclude billions of people over skin color. That's not what I'm asking. I figure it's my area but it looks like some other places have similar issues. That's why I was asking to get some confirmation.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 45
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Posted: 7/20/2015 8:18:47 PM

Correct me if I'm wrong but did you state on another thread that tourists make it possible for us all native New Yorkers to live and take advantage of rent stabilization, while they pay full price for everything? They just don't know any better so they pay, while we know the in/out of it all.


No, I believe I said transplants in that other thread NOT tourists. Tourists don't effect rents really. But I was kidding about the subsidy comment. B!tching transplants complain that they think they are subsidizing locals, and I was quoting them. But it isn't true, Rent Stab has been around a long time and even during the 70's when people were running away. If anything, they bring up rents to extreme heights and that causes landlords to complain and do corrupt things to throw us out lol.


Businesses and other are 16% on the pie chart. The businesses (not companies per say) that generate the most revenue are those located in tourists trap parameters ( Theater district, Times Square, Herald Square, Union Square), then you add the major airlines we have from where all arrives, the yellow cabs getting their cut as well, the hotels near 42nd Street, and all hotels in major tourist attractions, City Passes, Statue of Liberty, Empire State building, MOMA, Kat'z Deli, etc.


Actually taxes bring in most of the revenue, particularly RE taxes I believe. But by saying Tourism you listed a section of the economy. Tourism I believe only bought in 50-70 billion. Out of an economy of 1.3 trillion that is quite small:
My order if I was to guess:
1. Wall street and finance
2.Real estate
3. Media and film, fashion
4. Hospitals and medical and bio tech
5. Various services and tech services.

Also many of the things you listed are various services and are used by more than just tourists. Yellow cabs are used probably mostly be Manhattan residents. Airlines are used actually equally by us leaving and NYC is a transfer point for most of the USA to European destinations. Hotels actually cater a lot to business travelers. Deli's to whoever is hungry:). Even the museums on any given day the majority seem to be class trips from local public schools.

I will admit that the Liberty Statue is probably mostly tourists( i don't know many locals who ever been there lol).


But wait a second, this is where it gets muddy. The business has to be supported by the neighborhood, if no one is buying what you're selling, you won't make it. I know people who go downtown for anything


Well I agreed about certain areas, like projects but you REALLY think Brooklyn people from the ethnic areas will travel to Manhattan for food?I mentioned well to do Brooklyn areas that are diverse!
We have the best pizza(hint: it is in Midwood), best middle Eastern food, best Russian food, only Moldovan Restaurant in North America I think, best Turkish food,Best Kosher Deli's, best bagel stores. You get the point? ;). And your favorite Juniors for cheesecake was only in Brooklyn until they decided to turn it into a tourist thing.

Bronx does have 1 famous pizza place though :P

What is happening though is the large franchises and chains are BUYING people out, including landlords. Sometime the mom and pop just moves a few blocks away. The chains are trying to get the market and keep out competitors.

Take Dun-kin Donuts. I am sure you have noticed that they are at almost every subway station and often you will see another store front right across the street. On my block , we have 3 of them. 2 of them are mostly empty though. What they have done is bought up other storefronts to keep out other competitors from moving in. They will do well because people have little choice. It is a NY tradition to pick up coffee and donuts /bagels before entering the subway.

But sometimes they don't work out. Mc Donalds are closing in many places in South Brooklyn. Only the few drive in ones seem to survive. But the others took years of bad profits to actually close(mom and pops can't last that long on bad /no profits). Brighton Beach opened a Starbucks, I will be shocked if it stays open. No western Chain has ever been successful in Brighton Beach. Even their only American style supermarket closed. "Russkies ain't having it"

So if the neighborhood cares about the Turkish-Italian cafe, they better make sure it's full all the time.
The loyal customers are still loyal, and no less than that which will go to the Starbucks. It isn't about failed business. It is that they are being offered deals they can't refuse. And they are also getting badgered by landlords who want them out (because the chains can offer much more). Sometimes they just move close by and reopen. Sometimes they move far away. But pit stop food is about convenience for most people so the customers will not follow. Remember most people aren't foodies(I am not). If it isn't 100 feet away from my home, I am NOT going lol.


lmao @the ORANGE people

I thought they were bounded by the Jersey Shore.


Half of them were from Staten Island. The mayor of Jersey shore city was quoted saying that if they closed the bridge from Staten Island their would be NO Guido's in NJ lol.


There was a Carvel around my neighborhood, it didn't survive a year,


We just went there other day. I was happy!Most of them closed , but I found one when walking in Bath Beach. Baskin Robbins won the war by being in Dunkin Donuts I think.


My rent did increase by 2.5% I think, it's the lowest I've seen it so I signed a 2 year lease this time around, lmao. Is the new agreement 0%, I heard we were fighting for a rent freeze for a number of years, did we get it?


YES :)..so I had 1% and now next year I will have 0%. But it is a double edge sword, it keeps us from buying. I missed out on buying back when it was 200k for a house. Cheapest house is like 600k now and 100 yrs old. My friends outside of NY laugh. They like to brag how many rooms they have and I brag how cheap my rent is( but it is higher than their mortgages). Seinfeld was great about that topic.


I must admit, my a$$hole did get a little tight, I always took it for granted that such would never fade because some of NYC would collapse.

Don't worry it isn't going anywhere. NYC would collapse. How can you be an immigrant city without low cost housing? If it collapsed the city would fill up with more transplants being paid by their daddies in Indiana and there would be NO working class to serve the rich. Why would rich live here if they had no one to serve them?
If you have a rent stabilized apt I assume you moved into an old building or you inherited it (like I did). My father's studio is in a building near Madison Square Garden that was converted into a luxury hotel. He pays 700 a month all utilities included. The daily rate is 300-400 a night lol. They make him offers to get him out all the time. I think they will throw him out a window one day.

There's a lot of talk now in the news about landlords and their practices for getting tenants to move. So they have to leave that alone or do so more subtle so that people don't raise up in arms. Sadly, I do believe some will go to the extreme to get tenants out. Did you hear about the housing projects in Harlem which went without heat or water his past winter?

My landlord throws Raccoon's and Possums in the lobby, lol. Weird! But it takes them forever to fix anything and I am waiting months for a kitchen remodel that I am paying for(rolls eyes)
But I understand it from their view also. We have tenants that just don't pay. It is hard to evict them. My neighbors are Georgians, the country, and they haven't paid in over 12 months! People do that, move around from apt to apt getting evicted.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 46
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/21/2015 6:43:02 AM

I live in the UK and sometimes i come across profiles of white women who clearly state "I only date black men" same with the "I only date white men" a good chunk of the time it's not them being racist but it's Preference. Everyone has a preference some men like short women, some women will only date a guy with a beard, Some men prefer the larger lady only.


I agree that it's not necessarily racist. Sometimes it's what they are attracted to. BTW if a person only dates certain(s) groups, it is a requirement. Not a preference. A preference is when you like a certain group ( whether it's based on race, body type, hairstyle or color, height etc ), but you are open to dating other groups. I have seen many people on POF here mix up the terms.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 47
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/21/2015 8:37:44 AM
well,i'm going to contribute about nothing to this.

One, I agree with Blackwood's recent post, I think he made salient points.

Two, about NYC, I can't speak from experience. I live next door, and can attest however to francises coming in and pushing out the ma and pa's. the franchise does have the network support to weather economic storms. outsiders arriving in our little town, don't have to wonder if the java at Ma and Pa is to their liking, when there's a FunkinDonuts down the street--they KNOW what's being served there. Still, i'd hate to think KrispyKreme gets driven out, they too have an established taste and let the tourists enjoy that. I mean, when in Rome, eat like the Romans, right? why fly to Europe to eat a big mac?

I suspect NY is like Detriot. At one time, its location mattered, and that's why business went there. but in a modern age, location isn't as important, so people go there not b/c of a location on the map, but b/c of what business is already there and they'd like to be close enough to, to make deals face to face and not over Skype. If NYC gets a drain like Detriot did, it could end up the same way. but I suspect Detriot is a one trick pony, while NYC would have to lose the fashion, the entertainment, and the financial sector to turn into a Detriot.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 48
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Posted: 7/21/2015 9:53:55 AM
“The only people who ask what my racial/ethnicity is are Black people”

I have had exactly the opposite experience. I can’t recall a black person ever asking my race/ethnicity, but I’ve been asked by white people more times than I can count.

The reasons for our differing experiences are pretty obvious:

* You live in the liberal racial smorgasbord that is New York City, where most white people you interact with are either “beyond race” or highly reluctant to ask supposedly non-PC questions, whereas most blacks there aren’t concerned about that issue at all. I have always lived in the conservative racist South, where you are a race first and a human being second (if your race is actually considered human here). Most blacks that I’ve met have just automatically assumed I am black, because anyone in the South with one drop of black blood is black, by law up until relatively recently, as opposed to whites who have always found me extremely confusing because I have light skin, freckles and don’t speak in Ebonics like most of the other blacks they know, plus my mother is photogenetically white, so as soon as one of my classmates saw her dropping me off at school, it would be: “Are you mixed?” I don’t know how many times I was told “You don’t seem like a real n*gger, you’re one of the cool n*ggers.” Including by dates, though they would normally use a less offensive term.

* You probably interact with black people quite frequently, inviting more opportunities for such discussions. I don’t get along with black people at all, having few cultural similarities with them, and rarely ever interact with them. All of my closest friends have almost always been white, I have almost no black acquaintances and have worked with very few black people (most of which I did not get along with). Just this fact alone inspires some white people to ask what my ethnic background is. The only blacks I have significant experience with are my own family, and they obviously know what my ethnic background is. To be perfectly honest, I’m more comfortable among white racists than almost any blacks. Because, after all, I grew up surrounded by white racists.

“I've had to unfollow many people because they are constantly posting articles that express hate toward white people, while I don't see any white person (on my timeline or theirs) posting articles about hating Black people, not even one.”

Again, exactly the opposite experience. Man, when that recent Confederate flag flap first blew up, you wouldn’t believe how many of my FB “friends” were going on anti-black racist rants. Most puzzling is my “friend” who has a biracial daughter – I just don’t get her mentality at all – why have a child with a black guy if you hate black people? (It is possible she didn’t start hating them until after they broke up... sort of like my now somewhat racist ex-girlfriend.) I just stayed out of those discussions because too many of them are important business contacts. Plus, I don’t like black people either, but they’re damn right about the Confederate flag. And what are you trying to say when you fill your social media feed up with racist rantings even though many of your “friends” are black? Just like you don’t get why people do that on your feed about whites, I don’t get why people do that on their feeds about blacks, knowing many of their black friends will be reading them.

Anyway, I feel like your problem can be solved with one simple move: stop associating with black people. Just STOP IT. You’d be amazed at how all of my “black people problems” dissipated as soon as I stopped associating with black people. In my opinion, you’re creating your own "Racial Discussion Fatigue" issue by associating with the cause of that fatigue. So just STOP IT. (I do realize some white people might also be making such posts. Just stop associating with those, too!)

***

As for this original topic, the issue is not that people have “preferences” (actually, as pointed out by South City, requirements), but the way that they express those preferences/requirements. Unlike most of you, I’ve actually seen signs on doors and windows that said “No black people.” Doesn’t “No black guys” on a profile have a similar ring to it? Technically, it’s not the same, but it sure does look the same. It’s less a question of rights to one’s preferences or even the right to be racist than it is of rudeness.

I look at men’s profiles all the time in order to figure out what the competition is up to. I rarely ever see men say any such thing as “No black girls.” Not even when I’m searching in Alabama. But though I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s gotten worse lately, the percentage of women doing it is pretty darn high. Women know they can get away with pretty much anything in their profiles so long as they’re attractive. Men can’t, plus they get far less messages than women anyway so there is no need to filter at the profile level. I’ve known white women, especially in Alabama, who get greatly offended if black men are showing interest in them, like it makes them “less of a woman” or something, so “No black guys” probably makes them feel like they’re protecting themselves from “insult,” even if it accomplishes nothing otherwise.

Anyway, this is really just a POF problem, because it’s a large free site catering to the dregs of humanity (check out these forum dwellers, man!) and has very few built-in filters so people try to filter in the text area. Match and eH do far better jobs of dealing with this issue, because Match has built-in ethnicity filters that won’t offend any sane person that sees them while eH doesn’t match people of different ethnicities that won’t date people of other ethnicities. Even Tinder is better at this: “Yes,” I will date this person of this ethnicity, “No” I won’t date this person of this ethnicity – and neither person ever knows what the other person was thinking when clicking (unless someone actually took the time to say “No black guys” in that very small text area). I never see anybody ramble on about races they will date on eH or Match because it’s not necessary. With POF, you get what you pay for: racism, which is always 100% free!
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 49
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Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/21/2015 10:20:49 AM

Still, i'd hate to think KrispyKreme gets driven out, they too have an established taste and let the tourists enjoy that.

Only one left here I think!


If NYC gets a drain like Detriot did, it could end up the same way. but I suspect Detriot is a one trick pony, while NYC would have to lose the fashion, the entertainment, and the financial sector to turn into a Detriot.


It seems any of the cities that get under Democratic control LONG enough in a circle of spending (Chicago,Detroit, California cities) gets belly up financially. Thankfully NY leadership is a constant rotation in conjunction with an overbearing state gov't that keeps it rotating, so to speak.

But crime is the main thing (except for maybe Putin nuking Manhattan to save Russian speakers in Brooklyn ;)). The elites will stay if the crime is kept down. In the 70's +80's the city lost a lot of people and businesses started leaving to the other side of the river.

Sadly since the protests , gun crime has skyrocketed, mostly due to a slowdown with the NYPD( basically cops are choosing not to get involved )

why fly to Europe to eat a big mac?


LOL--but actually in the tourist cities it is filled with American's eating fast food..mainly Big macs! I remember they opened a TGIF in the capital city where I was working, and the place for empty except for American/Canadian expats! That's what I call comfort food, indeed! :)

WELCOME BACK HAWKING!
You lost me here though:


* You live in the liberal racial smorgasbord that is New York City, where most white people you interact with are either “beyond race” or highly reluctant to ask supposedly non-PC questions,


What NYC are you talking about? NYers, I mean the real locals(not the transplanted liberals who come here to escape conservative hell) are the most non pc talking humans you will PROBABLY meet on the planet. Most are just too busy to care to make trouble for others. But PC ? LOL. Most of my friends parents were basically Archie Bunker clones, and they were from different nationalities to begin with

The difference here is that there are so many different ethnics/races that no one group gets picked on
exclusively. And at the end of the day we can mostly get along and sip a beer( as long as people don't go into the wrong areas). But the stereotypical prejudices are alive and well.

I have been called the "K " word, Dago bastard, etc. Friends have been called Mick's. Hispanic the S word. And if you lived here it might be your friends and co workers calling you it! lol. There is NO or very little PC in the streets or offices. Women still get whistled and cat called! You might as well be living in 1925!

Bell is a college professor..does she sound PC to you? ;P
Well known Zbigniew Brzezinski( Obama's secret adviser) used to insult Russians during his lectures at Columbia university!


Unlike most of you, I’ve actually seen signs on doors and windows that said “No black people.”


Well according to some on the off topic, thug, is a racist designation. I of course don't agree(all criminals are thugs to me). But I have seen businesses say "no thugs allowed"( mostly Chinese Businesses)

When you speak multiple languages you will be surprised at the signs I have seen excluding certain people from jobs. I have also personally seen how certain ethnic businesses have basically treated others who were different by ignoring them.

But I will say that I think it is mostly women that put those profiles with exclusions like that. I have never heard a women complaining about guys doing, but since most guys get much less messages it is a non issue for them!
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 50
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History
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/21/2015 11:42:15 AM
What’s this “welcome back” crap? I’ve been posting for weeks in other threads. Just ask those hillbillies in the Confederacy threads I keep having to cut off at the knees. I didn’t know it was possible to continuously regenerate legs, but they are pretty much lizards.

“What NYC are you talking about?”

I actually assumed because Belle is a college professor, most of her associations were not exactly the non-PC working class type. Also, much like me, Belle the poster and Belle the regular every day human being aren’t necessarily identical twins. I mean, I say all manner of things on here I would never say in real life. Just ask the people who have met me!

“Thug” might be open to interpretation. “No black people” is NOT open to interpretation. Obviously I agree with your last paragraph, since I said as much myself!

“Interesting statement above.”

The situations my personality get me into are pretty funny to the outsider. I was at the Memorial Day weekend beach party of my best friend (half-Italian, half-Cuban, like seventh generation Floridian), which was mostly her rich family and their friends, and 100% non-black. It starts raining so a bunch of us flee back into the hotel suite, me directly behind her and her female friends/relatives but directly in front of some of the associated guys. As we walk in, one of the women says, “Somebody turn on some music.” The hickish guy about two people behind me says, “I got an awesome playlist!.. oh, wait a minute, gonna have to wait until the n*gger leaves for that.” Laughter behind me, uneasiness in front of me. My best friend’s daughter starts playing her own iPod of teenybopper dance-type music. And oddly enough, nobody said a single word about what the hickish guy said… ever. My best friend never even addressed it with me. Everybody just acted like it never even happened. Of course, they were all extremely drunk. Not sure if any of them remembers, or maybe they were excusing his behavior because he was also extremely drunk. Or maybe they’re all just a bunch of racists when I’m not in the room. Which has always been one of my biggest problems and one reason why I have major trust issues.

Ironically, I probably would have preferred the country tunes (having grown up in Alabama) to the teeny bopper stuff, so if he’d just played the music instead of saying that, this wouldn’t even be a story.

Again, I grew up an hour from Atlanta. It's crazy how you can drive for 30 minutes beyond a city limit and find yourself 150 years in the past. That's also true in Florida.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 51
Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/21/2015 1:34:24 PM
InnerGorilla-
Rather than specifically directed at you, IG, this is just a general observation and my take on things.
This thread is about race, specifically being rejected because of race, and I'm not trying to hijack it, however.........
The point needs to be made that regardless of where you are or who you are, beliefs come down to personal accountability.
There is bias of all sorts- race, culture, age, gender, sexual preference,etc.
There can be excuses for influence growing up, where people live, etc., but it's just that, excuses.
What I can do is stand by MY beliefs and try to influence those closest to me, because that is where we are MOST likely to make a difference.
I remember, distinctly, my youngest son coming home from school in the first grade and asking me what the "n" word meant. He had never heard the word used in our home, or by any of our friends and family.
I have kept an open dialogue with them from day one about what it means to be kind, compassionate and accepting of others (also to stand up for themselves).
They are not my possessions, they are individuals with their own minds, but I am aware that as a parent, they pay attention to what I say and especially what I do.
Overall, no matter where you are, you will find people that are close minded, about any number of issues.
Regionally, it can be said that it is MORE likely to come across these issues in certain places, but more than anything else, it's a character issue.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 52
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Posted: 7/21/2015 2:31:53 PM
“Hawkings, funny you bring that up.”

It’s not “funny” that I bring that up – I actually entered this thread, the only thread not directly related to Confederate flags or Donald Trump that I’ve posted in since our meeting, because I knew you were referring to me when you made that post. Like I forgot our post-Castle conversation. You have “other” as your ethnicity on your profile, which could mean a million things, like my “mixed” does, which is why I asked that question (I had knowledge about you that a random person on the street would not have). I wasn’t suggesting I don’t believe your experience or that it hasn’t proven true, even by me – I was only pointing out that our experiences are exactly the opposite and my theories on why.

“It's summer time by the way, I'm entitled to a tan ya know.”

Excellent tan indeed -- our complexions are pretty close to the same (see pic).
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 53
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Posted: 7/21/2015 2:35:25 PM


Unfortunately I think the media still does influence people a lot, its why it should/needs to be regulated. I wish I could remember names because it makes it so much easier when you quote them. But someone once said, he who controls the media rules the country. I think it related years back to Maxwell and the national papers here.
,

My big issue is that the media gets used as a scapegoat a lot, it's not MSNBC or CNN's fault that Donald Trump says stupid shit and then has to clarify later because he said stupid shit. I will agree that the media is influencing voters because they cover him 24/7 so of course he's leading the Republican candidates in the polls right now because early polling is stupid. He'll continue to say dumb shit and get coverage for it because he's getting support from far right conservatives who are like "Yea he's right! ****ing Mexicans are raping our women!" SO it's this never ending cycle of stupidity.



I agree. Often I find racists to be of a character I dont like. TBH, I think they need therapy. IMO they are often of low self esteem and have blame thing going on. They blame the world for the things they have failed to achieve. Also, IME, it doesnt stop at racism it follows through to all the other groups including sexism.

As for dating though, I think its fair that people chose who they date and who they have as friends. Providing their choices are their preferences and not an attempt to exclude a said group.


I agree I just think weak minded will be easily influenced by racists, those who think the whole world is against them are going to believe in the negative stereotypes and blame others for their hatred and plight. It's why I'm hesitant just to blame the media, cable news sucks nowadays but I watch the same damn news everyone else does and I'm fine. The new Black Panther Party is a hate group but I know that they are a hate group so I roll my eyes whenever a member speaks. But I have the moral compass and common sense that tells me "OK that's bullshit, that's stupid." As for preferences and people not finding anything common with someone from a different culture/ethnicity/race. It boils down to just give a damn and trying. I'm sure I can find something in common with just about anyone. It's not like we're dealing with tribes cut off from the rest of civilization. Our cultures may be distinct but we're not that different.


The more you post the more rounded you appear Blackwood. Thats a very healthy attitude, Im a bit envious tbh and wish I had the same confidence. I do sometimes, and sometimes I blag it, but sometimes those doubts take over your mind.


Thanks, honestly I'm not sure how confident I really am. I use to have shit confidence when I was younger especially in high school, I somewhat improved in college but it was up and down. My confidence has gotten better over the last 3 or 4 years and even still I'll have my down periods. I've always been consistent in how I deal with bullshit though, I hate dealing with bullshit and my tolerance for it is low. It doesn't help maintaining long lasting relationships but why fight for something that's damn near dead anyway? That's been my attitude and I've never understood why I'm the one who's expected to put all the effort in to attract someone simply because I'm a guy even though the female is an adult too and can definitely make her attentions known.



I personally dont think so. I think its one of those subtle things that creeps in then once its got a hold it escalates to a crisis point. I think its fine to put preferences but even then, in Britian if someone put 'I prefer white women', Id be questioning why they are putting that. It still seeming like its coming from a racist viewpoint. There is a section where you have to put your ethnicitiy on pof. If someone puts white british, black british or other. That should be enough for the average person to work out if its a match or not. I dont think putting preferences based on race is necessary.


I agree it just comes off as being negative, I've read profiles from chicks that said "no white guys please" and I'm thinking to myself "Why?" I'm not white so I shouldn't care but are they stereotyping, are they expecting black men to act an certain way?



“I've had to unfollow many people because they are constantly posting articles that express hate toward white people, while I don't see any white person (on my timeline or theirs) posting articles about hating Black people, not even one.


Then you're really trying hard not to see racism at all, I guarantee I can pull up a racist tweet, an racist comment from Yahoo and Youtube, past some bullshit Facebook post it would take me one minute to do so. I can be reading an article about a free agent signing in the NBA and I guarantee someone will post something racist.


Anyway, I feel like your problem can be solved with one simple move: stop associating with black people. Just STOP IT. You’d be amazed at how all of my “black people problems” dissipated as soon as I stopped associating with black people. In my opinion, you’re creating your own "Racial Discussion Fatigue" issue by associating with the cause of that fatigue.


That's just silly.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 54
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Posted: 7/21/2015 3:00:37 PM
blackwood85- "That's just silly"
Yes, indeed it is.
That would be rather hard to do, especially for me, considering that my daughter in law is black and my two beautiful grand daughters are part white, part Latino and part black.
My oldest son is half white and half Latino.
I see the looks we get when we are out together, but if you could magically pick us up from where we are and drop us anywhere else, some people are going to give us those same looks.
As I said, more than anything else, it's a character issue.
Btw- My son asked me about what they should say about their race. I told him to teach them to embrace ALL of who they are, but if asked, they should be taught to answer "the same race we all are, human".
If that doesn't set someone straight that would ask such a question, I don't know what would.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 55
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Posted: 7/21/2015 4:36:47 PM

he opportunity to date a wide variety of people is there, the desire or motivation to do so is questionable. Neighborhoods are not integrated here the way they are in other states.


It is a slow stew, instead of melting pot!

For people who are against equality, American culture, and feminism, this segregation keeps everyone from assimilating. And it will NEVER change because those who want out of this hell hole will move to suburbs or to Florida or Indiana and we will always have new immigrants coming in to take their place. NYC is different than the other US immigration cities because NO one group dominates. And it is more segregated today thanks to foreign television channels. Each nationality buys channels in their own language.

But areas are mixed and there are some problems. The Puerto Rican's and Mexicans in Sunset park are upset that their area is now a designated China town. And old Irish that haven't moved away get harassed. My blond Irish friend use to get beat up often growing up there.
Mexicans and Arabs are moving into Brighton Beach and the Russians and other FSU are getting angry, there has been some incidents (a Jewish Russian I think was raped recently). Oh and the pro Russian Ukrainians are even fighting the pro nationalist Ukrainians.
Some outsiders have been causing trouble in Bensenhurst, an area where 20 years ago NO ONE would dare enter to cause trouble because
some Italian hitmen would take you and dump you in the bay.
Things are getting a bit worst and more tense because their is a lot of encroachment on territory going on.


I'm not in my ethnic area so I have to travel :-(


I see. So if they move into your area it will be better than you have now. I am surprised they don't open more businesses because of Yankee stadium. When they fixed up Coney Island and opened that minor league stadium many chains moved in to the area.


I went to the Statue of Liberty on a class trip when I was in elementary :-P

Does passing it on the Staten Island ferry count? lol


It may be small compared to the total, but if we were to lose it, employment, businesses, and broadway as we know it will be affected.


That is true but you should see the audacity of these tourists. We went to a Broadway play to see Spider Man at 7pm. My gal was dressed in the standard mini black****ail dress , high heels and I was in a tie less suit. A tourist from a group of touring Pennsylvanians had the audacity to stop my gf in the restroom and criticize her for her dress, for being too short. The tourist was out of shape wearing baggy sweatpants/shirt. My GF told her to get lost! and she came out of the restroom all upset.

WTF? Now tourists are coming to NYC telling us resident natives how to behave, dress? I felt like going over to her group and telling them they ought to get back on their bus. When one enters Vegas, or NYC they better be prepared for sin I always say lol.

A similar incident happened with my wife, but we were in Disney land at the time and I guess when in Rome act like Romans( i will leave you to imagine that story).
But I hated tourists. For punishment they had me stand on Times square once in a while. Every few seconds I got badgered by some tourist. I once had a tourist get angry because I didn't know Airline departure schedule for JFK..lmao. And once the trains were delayed and one demanded I call a radio car to give her a ride.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 56
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Posted: 7/21/2015 5:16:11 PM

Belle, this is quite interesting. It's also interesting that a couple of the people I know that had no problem with what Trump has said, were New Yorkers.


Out of curiosity what did he say EXACTLY? I know he insulted Mc Cain, doing that wins points in my book, since he has an evil agenda against my people(wants us nuked). As you have been informed in the past, I don't really follow internal politics because I am studying Geopolitics, specifically the US hegemony land grab to get the Mid East and into Central Asia, and I think the international agenda is more important .I am more worried about WW3 starting (and if you knew what I did you would also) then immigration reform.

And I assume most NY'ers don't care because most immigrants here are LEGAL, since this is the legal entry point.

But I know many who are sick and tired of illegals entering and coming to NYC for the free benefits. They even have a new ID card for residents that were made mostly for illegal immigrants so they can get benefits. Apparently the legal green card lottery winners are a bit upset that illegals get in without a wait. Oh well!

But Trump is a RE tycoon with celebrity status. He isn't a politician and it is logical he doesn't know how to talk PC or be less than blunt, regardless if he is right or wrong.
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 57
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Posted: 7/21/2015 8:09:44 PM
McCain was a POW in the Vietnam war for a good 6 years, tortured but refused to give intel or go home early in an out of order sequence. To question his military status and his being a war hero is ****ing retarded, I'm a Democrat I voted against McCain in the 2008 sequence but he's a war hero and he's done a lot for vets. Trump on the other hand hasn't done shit, didn't do shit in 1967 when McCain was a POW and hasn't done shit since then. He's a billionaire but a billonaire who's been bailed out multiple times, while Trump himself has never filed for bankruptcy his corporations have on 4 separate occasions because Trump is a shitty businessman. He's the reason the USFL went belly up. The same guy who rails on Barak Obama is the same guy who publicly supported him in 2008. Trump is a celebrity, a ****ing joke who shouldn't be taken seriously, **** him. By the grace of God if he wins the Republican nomination, Hillary Clinton or my man Bernie Sanders should just laugh hysterically and then do backflips into the White House. President Obama should just blast "King Kunta" over a PA system in the White House lawn, it'll be a massive party. I'll even be out there drinking shitty Budweiser because that shit will taste like mother****ing Bollinger's if he wins the Republican nomination.


blackwood85- "That's just silly"
Yes, indeed it is.
That would be rather hard to do, especially for me, considering that my daughter in law is black and my two beautiful grand daughters are part white, part Latino and part black.
My oldest son is half white and half Latino.
I see the looks we get when we are out together, but if you could magically pick us up from where we are and drop us anywhere else, some people are going to give us those same looks.
As I said, more than anything else, it's a character issue.
Btw- My son asked me about what they should say about their race. I told him to teach them to embrace ALL of who they are, but if asked, they should be taught to answer "the same race we all are, human".
If that doesn't set someone straight that would ask such a question, I don't know what would.


It's definitely a character issue but I find the idea of just "avoiding blacks" has just being silly. I lived in Astoria, OR for a year and a half one of 5 black guys in the entire town, was on a cutter when I was one of two black guys surrounded by whites. Racial and religious discussions are going to come up no matter what, it has nothing to do with black people. I just find the idea of blacks being this monolith just funny and the idea that we're so hostile to anyone not black is just funny considering that's been the opposite of black culture for the most part and really a criticism by some blacks. That blacks are probably way too inclusive compared to other minority and ethnic groups. Like Hawking sometimes acts like there are no smart black men and women, no black nerds etc...I went to preodminately white schools for my entire life until I went to North Carolina A&T an historically black college and university (HBCU) and my black nerdy, comic book reading, gamer ass had no issues fitting in at all, dating black women and making friends. There were non-black students who were there and no one had issues at all in terms of racism as far as I know. In fact our Homecoming queen was an Muslim an North African who beat out the prettiest girl on campus, seriously one of the prettiest girls I've ever seen in my entire life. To paint this broad brush of blacks being this close minded group is just wrong. Especially in the state of GA in which the black population is large with a lot of affluent blacks and HBCUs.

As far as OLD goes blacks are already at an disadvantage anyway statistically speaking we're the least desirable race in the OLD world so really it's something we should be use to. Hell I'm not sure how I've gotten the mild success I've had so far.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 58
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Posted: 7/21/2015 8:16:52 PM

As far as OLD goes blacks are already at an disadvantage anyway statistically speaking we're the least desirable race in the OLD world so really it's something we should be use to. Hell I'm not sure how I've gotten the mild success I've had so far.


According to studies I have seen about OLD, black women and Asian men are the least desirable groups for OLD.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 59
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Posted: 7/21/2015 8:38:35 PM
grab a Fong Wa bus out of NYC, and if the wheels don't fall off on I-95 or 395, Mohegan Sun casino still has KrispyKreme. Come up for a concert, stay for the donuts--oh, and Micheal Jordan has a restaurant there. Or you can suffer Pepe's Pizza, the New Haven version of NY pizza.

US land grab of the Mid East and Central Asia? you thought you'd dangle that and not share?

the other people running for the Oval Off, I can see why--they get a bump on their resume, like Huckabee's $500,000 Fox paycheck. Trump just gets to extend his 15 minutes.
 GattoMonstrosis
Joined: 4/4/2013
Msg: 60
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Posted: 7/22/2015 1:38:10 AM
People have preferences, those preferences aren't always politically correct, it's not nice to feel excluded, maybe it feels offensive to be dismissed over something you don't think should be an issue in this day and age, but at the end of the day this is a dating site and not wanting to date someone who doesn't fit your preferences is pretty basic, be it skin colour, intellect, financial status or any one or combination of the hundreds of things that people are attracted to or repulsed by to whatever degree.

Click on next and forget about them, don't let them take up space in your head unless they're paying rent.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
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Posted: 7/22/2015 8:20:45 AM
“blackwood85- ‘That's just silly’
Yes, indeed it is. That would be rather hard to do, especially for me, considering that my daughter in law is black and my two beautiful grand daughters are part white, part Latino and part black.”

Oh, my entire extended family is at least partially black, and yet I’ve done an outstanding job at not associating with black people. I haven’t seen or even talked to any family members outside of my immediate family since I moved to Florida. I’ve gone to no weddings, no funerals, met no second cousins, etc. Much like my high school classmates, they’re all pretty much dead to me. So, it’s not silly if you try hard enough.

“Like Hawking sometimes acts like there are no smart black men and women, no black nerds etc...I went to preodminately white schools for my entire life until I went to North Carolina A&T an historically black college and university (HBCU) and my black nerdy, comic book reading, gamer ass had no issues fitting in at all, dating black women and making friends.”

Oh, there are plenty that are smart. One of my uncles graduated from Harvard Medical School and is now the head of a state’s prison medical board; everyone on my father’s side of the family has masters degrees or higher. Hell, I’m practically the “dumb” one. Does not mean our personalities “click” at all. And I just don’t spend time with people whose personalities I don’t click with. Unless they are attractive women who are willing to date me.

If I could just wipe out the entire first 18 years of my life... well, I wouldn't even be on this message board.

“I met you, and I think you would say exactly what you've disclosed here, in person as well, but someone has to be willing to listen indiscriminately to what you have to say. You are not shy, you just need to be engaged in the conversation, and all bets are off.”

This is absolutely incorrect. As I’ve said many times before, I walk away from racial, political and most dating discussions in real life. The others in the group just kept trying to engage me in a dating discussion, and I wouldn’t do it. I am a writer, not a talker. I go on message boards to discuss things I’d never say in real life – pretty much a release. Ask my best friends exactly how many racial or political discussions we’ve ever had, despite having known each other for over 15 years and being around each other constantly. I avoid real-life confrontation like the plague. It factored into my decision not to go to law school after scoring high enough for scholarships on the LSAT. The only kind of attorney I could have been was a constitutional research attorney. Which, looking back, would still probably be a better life than I currently have. Hindsight is 20/20.

I actually won’t usually even get into debates about movies (again, outside of message boards), despite being a filmmaker and having been a film critic for the better part of a decade. In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m considered a pretty boring person in real life, because I just will not show passion about anything. Except most of the movies I’ve made, but that’s mostly because, if I don’t promote them, who will? (Mmm, ignoring the fact that the distributor of my last film put tens of thousands of dollars into the marketing.)

Back to this actual thread topic:

“People have preferences, those preferences aren't always politically correct”

It’s certainly okay to have “politically incorrect” preferences – it’s just announcing those preferences in a rude, politically incorrect manner is where the problem lies, in regards to the OP (“But these profiles were becoming more and more belligerent (if you message me and you're Black you will be blocked, don't message if you're Black or act Black, I don't cross races, etc.)”). Certainly civilized people can express their preferences in a less hostile, less provocative manner – if they have to express them at all.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
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Posted: 7/22/2015 9:57:25 AM

If New Yorkers are like this then they have a problem and will be causing problems for the everyone. Being a New Yorker, IMO isnt a good enough excuse and I think NY needs to start addressing its issues instead of trying to make it acceptable because its how NY is. Any place could easily be like that with that attitude.


Actually, I would think you would support Trump, since he is against illegal immigrants apparently.

In any case it is the rest of the country politics that tend to cause a problem here. That is why there is a NYC+Long island Secessionist movement, actually 2 of them .One is the leave the state ,the other is to leave the country :). It is nothing new, during Confederacy succession, the Mayor and most of the city council were leaning towards succession. NYC (Brooklyn actually supported the war though) was against the war and the city actually made a lot of revenue from the South. There were the NYC draft riots because many of the immigrants wanted to have nothing to do with fighting for the union.


A friend of my from NY says it best with a laugh, he says he's not a racist simply because he is an equal opportunity hater. He hates everyone.


HAHA--"It is every goddamn NY'ers right to be miserable and treat every one like crap"- Ghostbusters

It is true- there are so many groups to insult and stereotype that no one dominates! Like Belle said, there a areas you don't enter after a certain time.

I remember at the end of the crack day,s I was dating a red headed P.R. gal( Puerto Rican) who lived in the Cypress Hills projects. Back then, the crack heads all sat around the buildings like Zombies and when "new meat" entered the area they would come alive and be the Walking DEAD.

So when ever I drove to pick her up or drop her off it was like the invasion of Normandy. I used to drive my Corolla with right on the walking paths at top speed (think Sigourney Weaver in Aliens driving the APC ;)), stop in front of the building abruptly, and then throw on my high beams.

The crack heads use to scurry away like Sleestak's from fire:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=21KMz0t06bY

By god, I only had about a 3 minute window until they would descend upon us.


So Joe, are you still a police officer or are you going to school or what?

No I am retired, and I decided to end my retirement gig. I have wage earning ceilings and it doesn't pay to work, plus who wants to travel a 2 hour commute on the subway being challenged by everyone who remembers me and has a beef to prove?

Ironically, I did contemplate moving away, like many others do, particularly to the south where we have social clubs made up of retirees (mostly in Florida and North Carolina). But I got rid of that idea real quick after reading forums. :)

Listening to all the whining posts about "how gals are ultra feminist Nazi's", "how no one gets dates","how women don't want sex soon"," how they are demon spawn" etc, etc, etc helped me to decide I wasn't about ready to enter America yet. Apparently Frank Sinatra was drunk !

So I do thank, and cherish the forums for helping me to dodge that hand grenade! Oh yeah, my written skills have also improved greatly.

I was thinking of writing a book though :P


No matter how anyone phrases it, immigration is a money making business. Supply and demand. I don't see many NY'ers complaining about this, I think we're more concerned about our own.


True, only concern has to do with demographics. I read that lately it is mostly Chinese and Mexicans that are coming here, probably the benefits that the south is withholding. If they become more dominant, like they are in Texas/Cali, I see the beginning of ethnic wars beginning.
Like you said, everyone wants their own territory( POLITICAL CONTROL) and traditionally no group dominates( actually Jews might be the most dominant). I know the other more organized groups (Italians/Russians) will most probably send out their so called MEN to cause problems if they are being encroached. They have done such things in the past. It is all about money, like you said!

That being said! Trump village in Coney Island (mostly Russians live there) has been using Mexicans for maintenance for years. Something makes me think they aren't union contractors!


I believe the goal of that program was to give people access to formal identification, and a chance to become more cultured and integrated.

That is what they tell you! Part of it is so people will have gov't ID so when cops stop you they will have ID necessary to write more tickets. As it is now, cops write"personal papers" when someone has no ID, but it doesn't work because they write BS names and addresses. I wrote a few Michael Jackson's and Abraham Lincolns in my day! :P


Some seem ok, but others dont.


Yeah some of us are total A holes and suck eggs! What do you expect from kids growing up who idealize Bugsy Siegel and Lucky Luciano types because they throw block parties with free rides and food!

US land grab of the Mid East and Central Asia? you thought you'd dangle that and not share?

(rolls eyes)...like you don't know already, you can inform as well.
But with the latest news I am just not sure if it will start in an Azeri/Armenia war like I always predicted or Mc Cain's puppet the hotheaded Saakashvili, opening artillery on Russian peace keepers bordering his new region( A region of a country that has nothing to do with him lol)
http://www.azernews.az/azerbaijan/85732.html

http://www.upi.com/Top_News/World-News/2015/07/21/Saakashvili-signs-deal-with-US-for-regional-support-of-Odessa/8261437496424/

Apparently he got bored being in exile in Brooklyn and volunteered to be a stooge again:
http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2014/09/mikheil-saakashvili-ex-georgia-pres-in-brooklyn.html
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
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Posted: 7/22/2015 3:34:01 PM

You know Im a fan Joe! Although..


Where are the Pom poms?

The other stuff was meant to go over MOST peoples head so don't worry about it. :)

As for the RE debate between Belle and Sactownromantic, I will have to take BOTH of your sides and non of your sides with the respective examples given, since it is dependent on jurisdiction at home and abroad. Where I own, I own completely without taxes but it is a condo so rules are different than owning land.

But ironically, if Belle is talking about RE in NYC, she is mostly correct that ones doesn't own it individually, in most cases. That is because at least 85% of NYC real estate are Coops.
http://manhattan.about.com/od/findanapartment/a/condoscoopsnyc.htm

What that means is that you buy shares in a building, kind of like buying stock, and you get to live in an apt that your share purchase allows. So you actually DON'T own the apt. You are just a shareholder and you pay monthly rent called maintenance for the upkeep of the property.

I mean what is the purpose of paying 200k for the right to live in a crappy 1br apt when you can just rent a 1br for the same price if you have rent stabilization?

It is usually cheaper to rent here and ownership is more for capital asset investment. So perhaps that is what Belle meant?

And in one of the Long Island counties( forget which one) if you get behind on property taxes they will take your home and sell it and NOT even return the difference , so they basically stealing your equity. A 400k home will have about 15k in yearly taxes so it is easy to fall behind .:(

Owning in NYC a REAL home (mostly in the boroughs) also comes with insane responsibilities that it is a PITA. Hard to evict if renting it out. Need to hire licensed contractors for everything. Need to keep sidewalk clean which is hard to do when thousands walk down it everyday throwing trash.

Heck, if a stray cat lives on your property and someone puts food on the property LEGALLY you can't remove the food because of companion animal laws of NYS , but you are now responsible for its well being. Trust me I use to do that to get animal abusers in trouble. I would have one of my gals put food right on the property, but within 3 feet of the entrance(city property). Then the mean idiot would come and kick the food away or remove it and I would jump out and tag and bag the guy!
 JoeCow
Joined: 2/13/2014
Msg: 64
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Posted: 7/28/2015 11:53:42 PM
I have seen a few profiles like that, but it is their prerogative and it dose not always necessarily make them racist or anything.. Sexual attraction usually comes into play to a degree with dating and some people genuinely are not attracted to some skin colors or races and primarily on a site like this people are not gonna take the time to message propel they are not attracted with no possibility of meeting, dating and so on cause most of us are on here for either, a relationship, starting up something that will possibly lead to a relationship, sex, or all of the above and if they are not gonna waist the time if they are not attracted to a certain race just like if they are not attracted to people for any other reason i.e too big, too skinny, to bald, too short, too tall, ugly, ect. I can not be upset if someone is not attracted to the race I am or any other physical trait I have.. Sure its still a forum of shallowness and in some of the profiles maybe the wording is too harsh "if your this race I will block you" "dont even think about messaging me" and so on but I'm sure a lot of it has to do with simply not being attracted to the skin tone or only attracted to people of similar race. That is actually very common I thought most people were more likely to be attracted to people within there own race the most or sometimes exclusively that dose not necessarily mean they dont get along with or like other races in every other way. Still sometimes there are exception like when someone is usually attracted to X, y, or z but found someone with one of those traits they they actually are attracted to.. Attraction is sometimes also complex, its not all just looks all the time for some it can be personality, style and so on. With all that said Yeah of course I know that some people it dose not matter about the attractiveness of a person they dont want to talk to some people of some race because they are raciest or maybe they dont want to deal with differing cultural values or bringing home someone of a different race to their family and dont want to explain it to them lol..

My personal views I have preferences on what I'm more or less attracted to.. I am not very shallow but I do have preferences but I will and have dated out side them.. For example I like women with short hair because it shows more of there facial features and if they can pull it off it makes them look different from the common long haired women that most have, and highlights some other aesthetics that I like, like ears and draws me into the eyes more, but Ill date people with any length hair, I prefer women to be taller since I like legs a lot and other reasons but Ive dated plenty of short women, I prefer women that have a style of dress that highlights other features Im fond off, legs, feet, lips, eyes, and so on but Ive dated tomboys that dressed in nothing but baggy sweatpants and when it comes to skin color I actually always have been rather attracted to black women, not so attracted to Asian women and I'm sure I'm in the minority on that one lol and I'm part Asian my self so thats more odd.. White women I tend to feel neutral about, depending on the exact shade it can help or hinder the over all level of attractiveness to me. Overall I just like soft, shiny skin regardless of color and I have seen women with every kind of skin color look either really good or really bad. Sorry I went further into all this then I intended to o_O my point is I have preferences on what I find attractive and some of them also apply to skin color and other features which is largely due to race but I will easily date outside of any preference I have because I can also be attracted to various personalities and they can still be attractive in other respects even if they dont have all my favorite things or are not from the 2 races I tend to find most attractive. Some others however can not bend much it seems and it is there right, but yes sadly some of it is because of racism but I do not believe everyone who rather talk to someone of a certain race on here is because they are raciest - it could be they are just not attracted to that race.

Anyways to wrap up this overly long post I have actually messaged a couple black women only to get a reply back "didn't you see on my profile I said no whites" I did look at the profile but I must have missed that part but the only other time I did that she actually did start talking to me for a while and mentioned I had guts to try anyways and explained she just dose not usually talk to white guys because she normally finds them not as attractive. we talked for a long time and even meet but she and I had differing ideas and I lost interest shortly after meeting because she wasn't very interested in anything long term when that is all I was looking for at the time.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 65
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Local phenomena or site-wide?
Posted: 7/29/2015 1:06:54 AM
One aspect of this apparent "phenomenon" to appreciate:

surges in any particular kind of membership, will always follow whatever new advertising the site puts out. If, for the first time, they just started advertising in a place in your area which is by chance, frequented by the more racist people, you'll see a surge of racists. It doesn't mean RACISM is on the rise.
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