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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > It looks like POF has already made some changes.      Home login  
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 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 76
It looks like POF has already made some changes.Page 4 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

I had soup today for lunch. Got it at Sprouts. It was pretty good!


I had bacon and eggs for lunch at Cora's and read the newspaper. It was good too. Not bored.
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 77
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 4:38:58 PM
I got a chef's salad at Walmart Grocery Store in Clearwater and it was yummy. only $4 and it was huge.

I went for a swim in the heated pool as well. not boring either!

hey KJ!
gotta love Nicole Kidman. you two share a resemblance!

"No Laws. No Limits. One Rule. Never Fall In Love"

Moulin Rouge
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 78
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 4:50:21 PM
Walmart in Clearwater has a heated pool? Dang, I am in the wrong place (soon to be rectified).

Hmm, talking about rape and statistics, I wonder if there's only one crime per victim or if there are additional counts. For instance; if a person is touched against their will (assault), drugged, kidnapped, raped, and murdered... is that only one crime of murder to the FBI database? Are the FBI statistics gathered from the court after sentences and plea-bargaining have dropped the 'lesser' charges of sexual assault and rape and then gone for a surer conviction accidental homicide in the commission of a federal crime?

It isn't a victim mentality or fear which keeps me asking these questions, it's anger at the perpetrators and those who aid them - knowingly or unknowingly - in many ways.
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 79
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 5:10:28 PM
WalMart has heated pools?
 11qq
Joined: 7/17/2015
Msg: 80
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 5:23:09 PM
yeah it does.

it's out back next to the dumpster. it's wash water from the carwash they have there.

the Walmart janitor and one of the deli cooks jumped in with me in his soiled apron.

we threw celery sticks that were floating in the water at each other.

you guys don't know how to have fun!!!
 newoldgirl
Joined: 4/16/2015
Msg: 81
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 7:08:59 PM

There are rare cases of random violence, but its not the rule. Typically, to be violent towards someone, you have to have some emotional reason, and its hard to be emotional about people you don't actually know and interact with.


I understand that most violent crime is committed by and against people who know each other, but stranger rape and sexual assault are by no means RARE! Tens of thousands of these attacks on women by men they do not know occur every year in the U.S. Violent attacks by strangers or stalkers are almost exclusively committed by males. That is male aggression. Generally, women simply do not do this. That is why I can't take your assertion that women are as aggressive as men seriously.


You have two intelligent male posters here than have great respect for women by their prior postings and you're dumping on them, marginalizing their opinions, intelligence and experience.


I don't know to whom you are referring, but my comments were directed exclusively to rearguard. I think his comments were completely incorrect, factually. I quoted his comments and responded to them directly. He did not respond to my point about his "woman scorned remark" nor do I expect him to. That is because he is wrong.

I did not dump on him. I disagreed with him. I have no opinion of him as a person, as I do not know him. However, there are people in my life and in these fora whom I like and respect, but who are also, sometimes WRONG.


And m a woman and I get tired of listening to this bullshit back and forth.


On the subject of male/female equality, I believe I am quite fair minded. I have no issue paying my way; I believe fathers should have equal rights with mothers; I believe that in most cases women DO have the exact same career opportunities as men do etc.

The ONE area where I simply cannot and will not accept the old "but women do it toooooo" argument from men or women is when it comes to violence against women, almost ALL of which is at the hands of men. It is simply not a level playing field. It never was; it probably never will be.

I get tired of people suggesting otherwise, because it's bullshit.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 82
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 8:07:40 PM
^^^ none of this had anything to do with your conversation with Rearguard. It had to do with the back and forth TODAY between Rearguard and Blonde Angelmwith a bit of Crookcatcher thrown in....two intelligent male posters IMO. Nothing to do with you or your comments the day before...just today.

And many are getting tired of ANOTHER thread being turned into another back and forth about rape. You have "facts" he has "facts" and we all have "facts" and the argument continues in a big circle and becomes a clusterfvck. Women are well aware of rape, men are well aware of rape. No one is suggesting otherwise, no one. The bullshit is bringing it up in every second thread.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 83
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 8:21:07 PM
Sviitmore - This is probably my sixth alias created in the last few months . . . and I had already decided it would be my last.

Motown - so sad, vagina dance!

Did it make you feel good to report him and get him nuked?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 84
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 8:42:56 PM

Try proving that women are GENERALLY more aggressive than men.


Rise of the female 'relationship terrorists': Study finds women are more controlling and aggressive towards their partners than men
Psychologists found more women are verbally or physically abusive to partner

Within partner relationships, women are just as controlling as men

It suggests 'intimate partner violence' may not be motivated by patriarchal values, as previously thought

Psychologists at the University of Cumbria questioned 1,104 young men and women using a scale of behaviour which ranged from shouting and insulting to pushing, beating and using weapons.

They discovered that women were ‘significantly’ more likely to be verbally and physically aggressive to men than vice versa.

Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2669408/Rise-female-relationship-terrorists-Study-finds-women-controlling-aggressive-partners-men.html#ixzz3gaWXLYHE
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook
=============================================================
I think filing for divorce is an aggressive action, and women overwhelming are the first to file. They also plan the divorce way ahead of filing much more than the average man.
 DietFree
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 85
view profile
History
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 8:50:51 PM

This is probably my sixth alias created in the last few months . . . and I had already decided it would be my last.

Let's see if he's true to his word.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 86
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 9:05:43 PM
^^^. He posted for a different set of eyes than many on here, gave an opposing view, he didn't back down to the female only perspective, he made me think, he debated, he argued, posed questions and yes, could be a PITA.

What have you done Diet other than throw in a silly little one or two liner here and there. Did you ever have an independent thought, stand up for what you believe in, add a contrary opinion, challenge the debate?? No, I didn't think so.

Life isn't all white bread. White bread is boring as hell.
 DietFree
Joined: 11/1/2012
Msg: 87
view profile
History
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 9:15:09 PM
^^^Someone's in a bad mood!
There's no need to take it out on me.
 newoldgirl
Joined: 4/16/2015
Msg: 88
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/21/2015 9:24:14 PM

^^^ none of this had anything to do with your conversation with Rearguard. It had to do with the back and forth TODAY between Rearguard and Blonde Angelmwith a bit of Crookcatcher thrown in....two intelligent male posters IMO. Nothing to do with you or your comments the day before...just today.


You didn't quote anyone specifically, so I didn't know to whom you were referring. However, like BA, I completely disagree with reargaurd's comments about women being as aggressive as men. That is not to say I agree with all of BA's opinions. Do YOU think rearguard was correct, or do you just think he's a nice guy? Big difference.


And many are getting tired of ANOTHER thread being turned into another back and forth about rape.


Well, you are tired of it. Hey, I am not saying it's a pleasant topic, and I am NOT the one who brought it up, but when I see comments along the "well, women do it tooooooo!" lines, when it comes to male on female violence, it pisses me off and I say something about it. It's simply not a valid or reasonable response, and it does not make a man appear very intelligent when he resorts to this sort of argument, even though he may be smart in other areas.


They discovered that women were ‘significantly’ more likely to be verbally and physically aggressive to men than vice versa.


One study can say anything. Common sense, life experience, and intelligence says something different.

Oh, and do you have any studies on random female on male violence? No? That's because it doesn't exist.


I think filing for divorce is an aggressive action, and women overwhelming are the first to file. They also plan the divorce way ahead of filing much more than the average man.


First , filing for divorce may be a completely defensive action (I'll let you figure out why this might be) . Second, we were speaking of physical aggression. Third, again, this "aggression" by a woman is limited to a specific man.

Yes, more women file for divorce. One would assume they plan it first.

My ex husband was quite bothered by the fact that I planned to end out marriage before I acted on it. I don't understand why... I mean, I guess he thought it would be better if I just got up one day and threw my stuff in a garbage bag and left?

I didn't "surprise" him with news of the divorce as a strategic ploy to catch him unawares. He was clueless because he didn't listen to me.
 motowncowgirl
Joined: 3/24/2015
Msg: 89
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 12:04:38 AM
@ #85, it's good to know that someone who has been consistently trollish, deliberately insulting, and systematically abusive of the forum rules has been once again removed herefrom. How many times do the whiners need to be told that NOBODY has the ability to delete profiles here? only POF staff can do that, so take it to bigfish and cry me a river though, ok? Wave that banner of foo foo pretend persecution, trolls being treated unfairly. Eesh. The word is transparent.
 BLonde^J^AngeL
Joined: 6/16/2015
Msg: 90
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 2:38:17 AM
Whistle shared a brief but scary scenario & got squashed. I ran with it. What happened in this thread exemplifies the point I was making.

Making light of anyone's experiences w/ violent crime is very illuminating.

I can't rationilize w/ irrational people.

They can't even rationalize w/ themselves...


How many times do the whiners need to be told that NOBODY has the ability to delete profiles here? only POF staff can do that, so take it to bigfish and cry me a river though, ok?
 runningout
Joined: 8/19/2008
Msg: 91
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History
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 4:02:45 AM
Sorry Song, but if the community voted to delete Svit's profile and it has happened on more than one occasion, then maybe he should not be so abrasive when posting. I find it hard to take someone seriously who cannot post without insulting other posters. Especially when the insult is something so unoriginal as "I can see why you are single".

As far as posts being derailed with rape rants, I think a lot on here are getting tired of threads being derailed period. Much like the What's the most terrible date you have been on thread.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 92
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It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 5:56:30 AM

One study can say anything. Common sense, life experience, and intelligence says something different.


The problem with this attitude is that while a study throws up facts, common sense, life experience, an intelligence throws up opinions. This argument has in the past resulted in the murder of thousands of people for things like witchcraft. It still happens today.


Oh, and do you have any studies on random female on male violence? No? That's because it doesn't exist.


Well, here is my life experience: I have been physically assaulted exactly once in my life. It was by a woman I did not know while walking down the street.

Using YOUR justifications, I would be forced to say that random female violence against men does exist. It happened to me!

Of course, I generally prefer to look at statistics before making a judgement. Common sense is known to be unreliable, intelligence is highly variable from person to person, and personal experience depends on the specific path in life you happen to travel.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 93
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 6:17:13 AM
Sorry Blonde my take on this is different. The lovely Whistle Stop told of her scary experience of some phone calls, yes scary as I'd have been scared too. Rearguard followed up with the the quote below which, in my opinion, was in no way marginalizing Whistle's experience, keep in mind Whistle said to the effect "I don't imagine many men will ever know that feeling"


^^ I think ANYBODY who received anonymous calls from someone who spouted intimate knowledge of their lives would be, at the very least, unsettled. I certainly would be. To suppose its only a female response that men would know nothing about is pretty indicative of how you view men and women, and not in a very constructive light.

For a man, there is nothing as scarey as a crazy woman on his case. Even if she is not crazy, if she is harassing him, its scarey. While I do not think that men, in general go about terrified of women, there is no doubt that they can be a worry if their behaviour is in any way odd. Anonymous communication is always unsettling.


And then you jumped in and all hell broke loose with the back and forth. You say something, he defends and adds a snipe...you respond and add two swipes and off it goes.

No one can rationalize with irrational people, exactly. But maybe rethink who is being irrational.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 12/25/2014
Msg: 94
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 6:27:51 AM
Whistle_Stop
My point is.....He never said anything sexual or threatening but I felt threatened.
I don't imagine many "men" will ever know that feeling.


rearguard*2;
^^^ I think ANYBODY who received anonymous calls from someone who spouted intimate knowledge of their lives would be, at the very least, unsettled. I certainly would be. To suppose its only a female response that men would know nothing about is pretty indicative of how you view men and women, and not in a very constructive light.


This is what started the whole "statistics" side track of who is more physically violent.

I can agree that fewer men will have experienced that sort of fear, though when a female stalker does target you then the male reaction will be similar to the female, and men get less support from society when this does happen/

However, I doubt many women ever fear that the courts will take their children away if they initiate divorce, no matter who is in the "right" or 'wrong". And there isn't any greater fear than that of losing a child. So men do fear women in these types of situations.

Women are equally as aggressive as men, they express this aggression differently.

As our society has become more civilized, this has given women more ability to express their aggression. Women can express their aggression on the Internet, in the courts,etc. AND I believe women are generally better than most men at being verbally and emotionally aggressive, and of using rules/ laws to express their aggression through proxies. You can see this on the forum, women are pretty aggressive and more sophisticated at it.

I will easily acknowledge that a man is more often physically aggressive in everything EXCEPT romantic relationships, and more dangerous when they get physical. But I think women are as intelligent as men, very few men will pick fights with say, Mike Tyson. because they know they will lose. Same for women, they don't pick fights they know they will lose, but instead use things like poison when they are of criminal mind, or the courts, not often direct physical violence. EXCEPT in domestic situations. More surprisingly, women are also just as likely as men to express hostility—in this case physically—in the context of a romantic relationship.

http://www.scientificamerican.com/article/are-men-the-more-belligerent-sex/?page=1

Now why is that?

Now the article does go one to acknowledge women face greater threat when physical violence is initiated in domestic situations.

But everything points to women being just as aggressive as men, though men and women express this differently, but it's no less effective.
 Whistle_Stop
Joined: 4/9/2015
Msg: 95
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 7:18:17 AM
First off....I was not having a discussion with Rearguard to begin with...it was with a story that el_capitano had linked.
I told my story because I thought.... it sort of related(the story) to how a woman would feel "physically" threatened by a man
without any threatening words being said.....the story we were talking about was about 3 women charging a man for harassing them on
Twitter....cyber stalking.

My mistake (according to Rearguard) and I don't retract it because imo,......"most" men will never know that feeling. Yes, as some have pointed out they get emotional in court or....
I'm talking about....in fear for your "life".....feeling. Probably men that served can relate.
I could tell by his response...He was going to veer off into the bushes with the ole' gender war...with his personnel insult to me of how I regard men.

pretty indicative of how you view men and women, and not in a very constructive light

I too....get sick of hearing the same shit on here....and especially another telling me who I am or must be......that's why I quit.
Tired of stats, where we heard from AdventureJoe how those are derived at a lot of times....so I could care less about
them.

Thanks for BA....for trying to take up for me....sorta. :)
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 96
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 7:36:34 AM

Making light of anyone's experiences w/ violent crime is very illuminating


To make light of......show as unimportant.

Quote where this happened.



This is what started the whole "statistics" side track of who is more physically violent.


I didn't have a dog in this fight, but...

That's exactly right.

Used the weakest type of evidence (statistics) to try and validate their position, then after getting the argument focused on the other sides interpretations of those stats, use those worded interpretations as insinuations of the other sides lack of compassion or "marginalization" of crimes against women.

I personally don't see how any rational person could equate opposing interpretations of statistical analysis as anything other than just that. But to then turn the opposing view into a statement suggesting no compassion or marginalization while at the same time using their interpretation to support and validate reeks of irrationalization.

I don't know rearguard or anything about him. I do however think he could have rephrased the second part of his first paragraph in response to Whistle. He may or may not have intended it to come across the way I interpreted it, but it is what it is.

Whistle just blew it off, she didn't get squashed and from knowing her past posting history she sure as hell does'nt need someone to take up the slack.
 07songsungblue
Joined: 7/10/2015
Msg: 97
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 8:00:23 AM
With all due respect Whistle, and I think you are an awesome poster, many of the posts on here seem to "veer" off into the bushes with the ole' gender wars. It gets tiring. And it did veer off with BA and Rear. Both genders should stop marginalizing the other gender's experiences.

My take on this is that " most" of us, both genders, will not know the "fear of your life" feeling. Many will, more women than men, but most don't.

Rock on Whistle and don't change a damn thing, you are who you are.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 98
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 9:36:43 AM
yeah, um...dragonbytes you hit some valid points, although, I am going to refrain from commenting.
 BLonde^J^AngeL
Joined: 6/16/2015
Msg: 99
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 11:06:03 AM
I am sorry if my words (I am passionate) were mean, but my BELIEFS are the same.

Whistle Stop, I want to publicly apologize to you about any acrimony in the past- I never disliked you at all...I appreciate your comment to me in here-seriously it means alot to me...
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 100
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History
It looks like POF has already made some changes.
Posted: 7/22/2015 11:38:04 AM

Especially when the insult is something so unoriginal as "I can see why you are single


Ah yes, the passive/aggressive set up where if you don't reply then of course you are omitting guilt, but if you do reply, well you are omitting guilt by protesting too much. It's used by people who are manipulators or those who do not know any better and have no real facts to offer for debate. We have probably all done it once in a while without meaning to, but the troll usage shows the person to be impotent in a discussion.
Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > It looks like POF has already made some changes.