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 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 26
Online World Different From OfflinePage 2 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
^^^
+100

A universal law in my universe...

Men are more forgiving except visually while women are the opposite.

Men age and learn to not to be so forgiving. Touch the hot stove a few times and you learn the hard way.

Sealady...

You are attractive and you described things you own. Bravo!

You are searching for a man without a past. Sorry, that is gonna be a hard man to find in our age bracket.

Most of your 'equals' are the never married bachelors. Have fun with those non-committals.
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 27
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 3:22:59 AM
Well....Mr. Patchjoker.....I can not speak for all the ladies but I will tell what online dating is like from my perspective and why I do not use it as an option and hide my profile.

Simply put....it is overwhelming and it makes me feel bad. You ask if we give all the non obvious pervs a shot.....I have to honestly say that...no, I did not. There was no way I could and that for me creates anxiety and a heaviness in my heart to the point that it is not worth it. It has led me to the belief that for me, if I should be fortunate enough to experience love again in my life, it will be serendipity and not through actively seeking.



****besides the fact that the word....serendipity....is just so fun to say....fast or slow!
Don't believe me? Give it a try!.. Ser·en·dip·i·ty.......See? Happy Friday y'all! :D
 sealady111
Joined: 5/31/2015
Msg: 28
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 5:02:49 AM

The fact that you still don't understand why men don't care about those things and continue to think that's a man's problem explains a lot. Offer men what they want instead of what you want them want and life will be easier.


OK I will bite.
What do you mean?
Please be specific.
What should a woman offer men to give them what they want to make life easier?

Bearing in mind she is ...........


56 years old, taller than average and larger than average, sexual organs operational, university educated, articulate, active, sensual, outgoing, confident.



 MissScawlett
Joined: 3/26/2015
Msg: 29
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 6:29:21 AM
I'll be the first to admit, when I signed up years ago, I thought finding a new boyfriend would be easier than shooting fish in a barrel. Sadly, it's turned out to to be harder than nailing jello to the wall.

For some reason, the online world causes people to think they're way better than they are and have much more to offer than they really do. It creates some sort of "I'm better than the rest of you" delusion.

It would be helpful if people would take a serious inventory of who they are, what they want, what they expect, and what they offer -- and be realistic about everything.
 LLove2LaughToo
Joined: 3/5/2011
Msg: 30
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 7:18:43 AM

sealady111 :
What should a woman offer men to give them what they want to make life easier?


I just read your profile. Maybe some men are not reading the end of your profile intro where you are discussing your "experiment" (Wants to date but nothing serious).
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 31
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 8:55:39 AM
I agree with Scawlett, it IS the illusion that you are "better than you are"...because of the format. It seems like the easiest thing in the world, initially, to simply sign up, then use keywords to "custom create" your own human to come love you.

"I have never sent a perverted message and it got me nowhere with OLD"

We gals appreciate that you never sent a perverted message, or a verbally abusive one, raging at us when we say no thank you to a message. That was one of the main reasons I left OLD. But it also doesn't guarantee that you are going to get any dates, either. Heck, I thought I had PLENTY of great qualities that men would appreciate. I discovered that what I valued in myself had *nothing at all to do with what men online were looking for* nor did it contribute to the success of any relationship online I may have hoped for. I didn't have any relationships, even brief ones, resulting from online dating. Generally the dates were "one hit wonders" consisting of me discovering all kinds of dealbreakers that were revealed once we sat down to Thai food. Drug use, lies, alcoholism, along with the other things I mentioned in my first post.

Unfortunately, "being a nice guy" doesnt work for men online, and that is the biggest gripe I see from men who are continually disgusted at the reality that women will chase after Mr. Unavailable..which is what OLD is FILLED with! Haha you would think women would FLOCK to OLD instead of leaving in droves, as many men have reported has been happening recently..alot of female reluctance. Well, maybe unavailability and abuse go only so far..or maybe those free meals that women seem to want have run dry, since there are many broke men trolling online for a quick and easy girlfriend.

Actually what I think is contributing to this is our current hook-up/it's cool to be a flake culture, where everyone bolts after a date in terror of vulnerability. No one trusts anyone. People just want to be lost in a haze of celphone distraction, Netflix and in general, non contact. It's like we have lost the ability, with all the overstimulation of technology, to have any real patience and appreciation of people.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 32
view profile
History
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 10:05:59 AM

It has led me to the belief that for me, if I should be fortunate enough to experience love again in my life, it will be serendipity and not through actively seeking.


I know that you will, our soulmates come when it is time, and there is ALWAYS a time, and they may leave us when it is time, but there IS a reunion! Just have to be ready when it does! There is hope for those like us ;)

On a side note ,I always wonder how the living arrangement is when with our multiple soulmates at the reunion!What if they don't want to share?


My brother, a healthy active 25-year-old, had a ministroke in broad daylight and was at the hospital all in wires.


Sorry to hear that. Hopefully he is doing well now.


For some reason, the online world causes people to think they're way better than they are and have much more to offer than they really do. It creates some sort of "I'm better than the rest of you" delusion.


True, and it has ruined a generation of people who are going to be searching for their great white whale like Capt Ahab ! To succeed here one has to be reasonable, have a wink a from the gods (hopefully Aphrodites), and realize future relationships will never be the same as the ones we had in the past. But that doesn't make them worst!


Unfortunately, "being a nice guy" doesnt work for men online, and that is the biggest gripe I see from men who are continually disgusted at the reality that women will chase after Mr. Unavailable..which is what OLD is FILLED with!


True, I call that "the Sex and The City syndrome"( many watched that show and even try to behave like them). Personally, I think it stems from a culture where people are independent and mobile.

Single people are like Newton's First law of motion (Google if you flunked), it is easier to just stay the way they are going. But if we are lucky we can achieve the Third law of motion. :)

A universal law in my universe.
In my universe, the law is when you find them, love them more than the "moon and the stars"! And NO one doesn't have to be a beta male doormat to do that!

I have been saying that OLD sucks forever on here. I have also given many reasons for the suckage.

Cheer up! You have to lose before you can win! That is the measure of a man!
Here is a song for you from Rocky 5 and it is MOSTLY true:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OHfw7Rp6HSs

If worst comes , you at least memorized the song and when you go sing it in a Karaoke joint, YOU might be surprised at the result! :P


Respect and courtship seems to be a thing of the past.

It isn't dead, just hibernating. Something tells me you got the fire in you to melt it though!;)


Online is worse. You have no idea if you're making any headway in the messages written. You get no clue if you were rejected by that, or something within your profile.


Does it matter? I assure you with almost certainty that if they rejected you and no other opportunity comes than they weren't one of your soulmates. That being said, some times the "TEST" is being assertive and persistence. Do what you must and let the world sort it out!


It does work though, I dated Christie Brinkley for a bit when she was here, same with Jennifer Anniston.


Hopefully you didn't ask them to go Dutch!
I tried pm'ing you back, but yes we have too great an age difference. We need to find a middleman here to exchange info lol. It will take 2 heads to come up with a post Zombie apocalypse survival plan. But KJ must be picked up at all costs! Notice the double entendre! ;)


This is why it baffles me when so many folks have unrealistic set of expectations, and are easy to turn down and reject a person online.


True. Something makes me think you were from Brooklyn? Please tell me your secret for getting kicked out!please!
 rockin-trucker82
Joined: 1/4/2014
Msg: 33
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 10:24:41 AM
I've found we're all our own worst enemies on here. Some admit to it, some don't. Like VK said, it's pretty much the "leftovers" here. It's the guys who can't talk to a girl, it's the single mothers with 4 kids that has no free time. These "downfalls" don't go away online. WHen you meet offline, you're still shy and you still have an impossibly restrictive home life. People come here looking to use this site as a crutch, either for their downfalls, or for their weird idea that they only deserve the best. The fit guy/girl that goes to the gym every day, has the perfect body, a great job, makes lots of money, owns a house, drives a nice car (can't figure out why you can't seem to meet anyone at all that fits the shopping lists of requirements). Anything less just isn't worth your time.

We also approach online as being online. That interpersonal connection doesn't exist to a lot of people. It's easy to forget that there's an actual person on the other side of the screen. Because of this, we do and say things that we normally wouldn't. We tend to not be as rude offline. It's not that common to say hi to someone at a bar and have them just turn away and talk to someone else. Conversations start way easier. You can talk to the girl that's stuck in line in front of you, once the line is gone you just both move on with your lives. On sites like this, it's either you'd both date each other or nothing, which while it completely makes sense for a dating site, is the reason that you wouldn't date them you or them? Basically, is it because he lives with his parents, or is it because you perceive living with parents as a complete roommate arrangement, paying 50% of bills including rent/mortgage, or paying rent and doing your share of housework as being somehow less responsible than the same living arrangement with a stranger you found on craigslist?

It's actually not uncommon to know people who have profiles on here, but then they met their gf/bf while they were out at a bar. You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. But on here, we're not willing to take that shot with most people.
 ThePigIsHereForEternity
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 34
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 10:38:18 AM

I've found we're all our own worst enemies on here.


Oh, boy. There you go speaking for everyone again. Not everyone has endlessly struggled with online dating, and not everyone has had a series of disastrous first dates. It seems there are people who simply believe what happens in their little corner of the world represents what's happening for everyone on the site, and that's just not true.





Same for me, this venue is a no go however never say never. A friend has met a great guy on match, I like him alot but it's only been a year. After a few more years together then I'll say there's merit to online dating.


It's interesting that you're neglecting to see the positivity in their being together for a year so far, while also neglecting to acknowledge the fact that many people who meet in the real world end up together less than a year. Shouldn't this make you skeptical of people meeting and getting together in the real world, as well??
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 35
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:05:40 AM


I have never sent a perverted message and it got me nowhere with OLD


Ya know...I chuckled when I read this.

I hear you.

Aren't women supposed to respond to articulate and well crafted messages??

I have a job and I didn't talk dirty, WTF?!

Hahahahhahaa
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 36
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:07:05 AM
I am going to talk negative this time.

In real life you see an attractive woman and want to approach her. But the rejection factor is more real, more in your face, so at least in my case, I did not approach but let the situation approach her. For instance standing at a crowded bar, so you can quickly start a conversation without changing your location. Also being with friends, so you don't have to give a sh i t, but see what happens. Then there's problem number two. You talk to her. You kind of sorta hit it off, until she throws the bomb, the "my boyfriend and I like to do blah, blah, blah." That is her hint to say that she is there with her girlfriends having a good time and even though she likes your flirting, she is not going to go home with you, or even give you her phone number. There are about 20 versions of this story, from married and keeping it quiet (meaning she wants to do someone, but it's not you), to I just broke up with my dude and I am still feeling miserable, to the right now I hate all men, to the you're cute but not my type, or the ones with the look that says "you're just like all the other guys."

Real life has all these hurdles, to the point that if you are good at the pick up, you meet someone. If you are not, things happen when you least expect it, or when you tell your friends that you do not want to go to so and so club, bar, place because it's a meat market and you are not into it. Yet you go, and while rejecting a bunch of women, you end up picking up someone. Or more realistically, she picked up you.

The only good thing about real life for me, was that I had online. That meant that when I went to a place, there was no pressure, I was there to have fun with my friends and if anything make fun of the women and all the men trying to pick them up and I didn't give a sh i t. Because before the weekend was over, within spending a few hours on the internet, I could align a date with someone ten times hotter than any woman we had seen that night.

So there. That's the other side of the argument between Online and OFF line.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 37
view profile
History
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:24:43 AM

it's the single mothers with 4 kids that has no free time. These "downfalls" don't go away online.


Yeah , well maybe first you shouldn't consider single moms downfalls or leftovers. Sheesh , God forbid you open yourself up to a women who actually has a track record of being caring and loving.

You know who is online? The same people out in the real world. Heck, I even see more professionals and attractive women per % than I do in most real life venues(unless I go to Soho or meatpacking district..but some of those gals are really dudes so..). But yes they are pickier today. But they behave the same in the bars and clubs also, distracted by technology, friends and the guys hotter than you.


We tend to not be as rude offline. It's not that common to say hi to someone at a bar and have them just turn away and talk to someone else.

True, but when it happens IRL it stings more. I have had the proverbial "frack off" IRL...in 4 different languages mind you(not counting the 2 I didn't understand)! When I was sending messages here I honestly wouldn't even remember 5 minutes later who I wrote. It is a game , with rules..learn the rules. or get out of the game. or if you are bold MAKE YOUR own rules and see who wants to play!


Conversations start way easier.


Agreed, so why stay here and complain? When you have a meeting do you evaluate non verbal communication(55%)? If it is lukewarm do you try to warm it up by GIVING her what she probably is looking for and hasn't found it yet? Again, most meeting will go nowhere but you gotta read the non verbal cues! Otherwise you might as well be talking to IG at the bar!:P


ou miss 100% of the shots you don't take. But on here, we're not willing to take that shot with most people.

100% true,but in real life most girls aren't taking shots with guys they aren't interested in either. You should read a fantastic post by Oluben, where he realizes that at the end of the day, the successes are mostly always from the gals that had SOME attraction. That is same OLD or IRL.

TBH the only REAL advantage IRL these days is that you can more cheaply and with less time investment screen and be screened by multiple women SOLELY based on attraction.

Example in night venues: You can spend all night trying to get numbers and get a few by closing.
Example in street game sniping: you have a red head tall women fetish ? Go to SOHO and hit up all the Red headed models walking around, smoking outside or sitting in a cafe. You get some numbers!
Example OLD: you get numbers, NOW you are stuck meeting without establishing a real attraction. More time consuming and expensive.

Online has productivity limitations, that is its main flaw, especially for guys, namely because each encounter takes up a larger share of resources than IRL! But if your cool with just having a bit of fun, no expectations, than OLD can be productive.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 38
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:35:09 AM

Back to life, back to reality
Back to life, back to reality
Back to the here and now yeah
Show me how, decide what you want from me
Tell me maybe I could be there for you

However do you want me,
However do you need me
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 39
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:44:44 AM

it's the single mothers with 4 kids that has no free time. These "downfalls" don't go away online.


And here's an advantage of Online. First of all, super hot women also end up having kids, relationships, marriages, divorces, careers, promotions, layoffs, the works. By they time they are 25 many have had at least one child. By the time they are in their mid-thirties they have two. If they don't have two, the majority WANT to have a baby. So if you really, really try to understand their psychology, instead of running for the door every time you hear the word kids, you have a huge advantage with these women and consequently THEY WANT YOU. So I am with Joe, don't discard these women. All the super hot chicks that I've dated had children.
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 40
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 11:46:11 AM

Good luck OP, you're an attractive man and seem very nice.


Opie deleted.
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 41
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 12:00:51 PM


Oh, and does it ever attract the lazy. Lazy and broke. A whole generation of lazy, broke people eating potato chips, drinking Coke and staring at a screen, hoping to find their pot of gold with the most minimum of effort. And if anyone falls short even a fraction of a percent..into the dumpster they go..sort of like in Willy Wonka, when the "dud" golden eggs go right down the chute into the incinerator.


The dark side of dating indeed. Lies of omission.

Creating stalactites is more painless then being vulnerable...
 Peas_
Joined: 5/2/2015
Msg: 42
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 12:13:19 PM

Same for me, this venue is a no go however never say never. A friend has met a great guy on match, I like him alot but it's only been a year. After a few more years together then I'll say there's merit to online dating, until then I think it's bizarre and inappropriate by pushing the river and not letting life naturally fall into place.


Strange how people find the forums then, eh, shirely wonton?
 lagomism
Joined: 7/21/2015
Msg: 43
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 1:16:34 PM

It just hasn't worked for me. How has it worked out for you people?


​I tried online dating several years ago, via this site, under a different username. Now I just use the forums because I value the perspectives shared here, they have been invaluable. My online dating experience summarized:

I guess I knew beforehand that there would be very sexually-direct people, but I did become very soul-wearied by the sheer amount of sexual overtness that showed up. But then it seemed I didn't even know how to pick people, which taught me an enormous amount about myself, what I'm attracted to. There's a thousand tells about someone that you can get in an instant in person that are just missing online. Online I would see an attractive (to me) man, and maybe after some messages we would meet, but then I might find the attraction all wrong for me. I adore a smile that moves the cheeks and creates wrinkles and reaches the eyes; I adore what I can only call a beautiful center of presence, meaning, in how they move and how they are paying attention to what is actually going on right in front of them instead of having a virtual reality date in their own mind. There was even one man that I wondered if I moved, if his eyes would actually follow me, because it seemed that he was someplace else entirely even though his body and speech were right there in front of me....

So I learned for me physical attraction wasn't necessarily just about a face shape, bone structure, or any such thing...it is a particular way of a man being in his own skin that I am attracted to, the way he inhabits the face and body he has...and that doesn't show up online. I would not have known that had I not had the online experience, it helped me understand why I can be attracted to a wide physical range. Also, sometimes I sensed that my date had no genuine interest in me, but still would have liked sex, and that didn't intrigue me. I'm not very overweight but I am kind of chunky and I'm middle-aged and I'm ordinary (a little skewed to odd) in appearance, and at least once a man vaguely hinted along these lines that he had lowered his general standards, made an exception to see me, and I inferred from this that they hoped to be rewarded for their hardship and sacrifice...which also did not intrigue me.

A couple of times very nice men revealed they didn't ever want to get married or live together ever again with a partner, when that wasn't in their profile (I would not have messaged them otherwise). I would immediately lose interest after that in each case, because while I didn't want to marry or live with him, I also didn't want to NOT marry him or NOT live with him, if that makes sense. I felt like they were saying to me "this is my world and you have to fit into it" and didn't want a new world of 'us' (which is what any relationship is) and being open to whatever might unfold in that new universe. Just different paradigms, and I can only be in one at a time. But I definitely appreciated the honesty!

I have read on the forums about women not responding to men who message them, and the frustration this causes men. I was guilty of this behavior, and not always just towards the sexual overts. The written word can have a powerful charm all on it's own, and most of the men who messaged me didn't charm me in the least, the messages felt rehearsed/canned or tired/stale, but most of all impersonal in essence. Once in a long while I would get a message where the man would make it personal to ME, like asking me about my username, or say something layered that I could respond to with my own layers :) , and those stood out, and I answered. If I didn't 'feel' a message was personal, it just didn't warrant a response. I guess I felt it was better (certainly easier) to not reply to a message that I found uninteresting? Written chemistry is as capricious and arbitrary as physical, as anyone who likes to chat/message will attest in the affirmative.

If I did anyone any emotional harm by letting their message pass unanswered, I hope that I am forgiven, I never meant to hurt. Almost 100% of the time for my connections, I messaged first to men in whom I was interested; I would make myself known to them via message and pic and sometimes there was not a timely reply or a reply at all. Initially I would feel a pang or two (or many!) of sadness at the perceived disinterest but I soon learned to 'let go' of expectations the moment the message was sent, and I would delete my sent message so it didn't even stick around as a reminder in case there was only radio silence in return. It is truly very freeing, to make inspired moves when rejection/indifference be damned! It's all just feelings and it all passes. Nothing to be afraid of! This lesson learned online is serving me very well IRL...

I'm taking on a new personal strategy IRL of seeing every man as beautiful and interesting and talking to him if the opportunity arises...from the acne-scarred 18 year old at my favorite coffeeshop to the 80 year old man at the dog park who has lung cancer and all the actual date potentials that fall elsewhere on the spectrum. That inner = outer, mirror thing. While at first difficult and I was awkward, now smiling a genuine smile at strangers is becoming easier all the time. An attractive man at the dog park told me suddenly during a casual conversation "You have a very kind face." So perhaps my strategy is working, ha!

So no more online dating for now. Ironically, all this said, I kind of have an online potential, but I met him in a forum that was not a dating site but about a common interest; we began messaging privately last spring and a wonderful friendship has grown out of that. Mostly we talk on the phone. We live many states apart but I spend every winter near his city, so I'm hoping to meet him in person in a few months. Per a couple of photos he is physically attractive to me, but the closer it gets to meeting me, the less he acts flirty in any way (a noticeable change) and he is bringing up more and more that he is an old man (he's only 61), and telling me suddenly about all the women he's dating, etc, so I'm unsure if he is just not attracted to me as anything other than a friend and thus he's managing down any hopes I might harbor for more, or if there is a personal fear that I won't like him so he's preemptively creating barriers...I don't know! Maybe something else entirely. I much enjoy his friendship so I hope whatever happens that doesn't go away, but who can say?

All this is just one woman's experience from the retrospective position of ~three years past. I enjoyed reading everyone's perspectives on the matter, thank you all for sharing your views. I have never posted on the forums but I feel like I 'know' some of you because I have read the forums for a couple of years and some of you have helped me greatly without me even asking because of perspectives you've shared that were eye-openers for me. :)
 clooneystutor
Joined: 3/8/2015
Msg: 44
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 1:30:29 PM


the less he acts flirty in any way (a noticeable change) and he is bringing up more and more that he is an old man (he's only 61), and telling me suddenly about all the women he's dating, etc, so I'm unsure if he is just not attracted to me as anything other than a friend


Thank you for sharing.

He may truly see you as a friend only.

That being said? Some folks think they are increasing their attraction by telling you how popular they are.

I have a don't ask don't tell policy. On several occasions, I've essentially been told that I'm in a competition, and later, that...I WON! Wowee me!

Ya know Steve, I have 2nd date lined up this week, but I'm gonna cancel it to be with you
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 45
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 1:33:32 PM

or say something layered that I could respond to with my own layers :) , and those stood out, and I answered.


Bingo!! And here guys, from the words of a woman, is what can make Online very effective. Everything Lagomism said is true.
 sigungq
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 46
view profile
History
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 2:23:49 PM
Online, men outnumber women by quite a bit. Offline, (it is said) that women outnumber men. I suppose that's true if you are 80. Either way, I've found the two worlds identical: Offline I get told NO, online I'm either ignored or get told NO. SSDD.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 47
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 2:34:47 PM

Offline I get told NO, online I'm either ignored or get told NO. SSDD.


I don't understand why you're so insistent on using the pic that would make women cross the street when they see you coming down the sidewalk, when you have pics of ball room dancing or the wine glass shot.

Give yourself a chance....dang.
 Strawberry_Jello
Joined: 5/13/2014
Msg: 48
view profile
History
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 2:37:21 PM
No, I get nice messages too. But a lot of them fade away without us ever meeting. I rarely let a message go unanswered. I have had several first meets with men who send nice messages, but very few second dates.
Yes, I give them a chance. I reject very few men, most reject me.

I even give some guys who send inappropriate messages a second chance, if they weren't really bad. I figure, eh, they're guys, what can you expect. I let them keep talking to see how far they will take it. That hasn't worked out either.

I am not looking for Mr Perfect. I want clean, treats me with respect, not totally broke. I want not boring, as in willing to go out and do things with me.

The main difference for me, OLD vs IRL, in IRL, I'm invisible, apparently due to my age. The few men I've dated from IRL, NEVER said anything of a sexual nature before the date, during the first date, or second.



I know the ladies get creeps and pervs messaging them. But....do you mean to tell me that is all the messages they get? If you could peel away all the perverts and creeps, are the guys that are left being given a fair chance? Are ladies saying....."well, he is not the cutest but his messages have been nice and he is not a perv....I'll give him a chance...? There are others reasons at play than just the perv excuse. I have never sent a perverted message and it got me nowhere with OLD, I tried to incorporate info from profiles with my messages,... and it got me nowhere with OLD, I tried different profile set ups,..... and it got me nowhere with OLD. OLD does not work because most guys are looking to get quick a** and most women are looking for Mr. perfect. That is the truth of OLD.



Purple, if she's corresponding with you, you ARE making headway.


Online is worse. You have no idea if you're making any headway in the messages written. You get no clue if you were rejected by that, or something within your profile.



I had a guy ask me if I have any KY on hand (after a second date). Um, NO. I don't need it. And that answer can be taken two ways. ;)


Had a guy wanted to know the size of my shower, big enough for two????, whether my dining room chairs were strong enough to take two, guess what for......and when could he come for dinner???. Passss..... The thing is he looked attractive and intelligent and supposedly had a good steady job. We had conversed for a few weeks, spoke on the phone but it was obvious he was after quick sex but lamenting that he couldn't find a good woman and was lonely....



Clooney, that is what really gets my hopes up, articulate and well crafted. So that works for me, those guys always get a happy response from the strawberry.


Ya know...I chuckled when I read this.
I hear you.
Aren't women supposed to respond to articulate and well crafted messages??
I have a job and I didn't talk dirty, WTF?!
Hahahahhahaa
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 49
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 2:41:49 PM

I don't understand why you're so insistent on using the pic that would make women cross the street when they see you coming down the sidewalk, when you have pics of ball room dancing or the wine glass shot.


If I had pictures dancing like that...I would have been way too dangerous in OFF line dating. While being a Latino means that I should smoke on the dance floor, the reality is that I suck and dance more like a gringo with three left feet. A guy I know, balding, short but dancer-fit is a total player. Too bad he's married with a couple of teenager daughters. Go figure.
 CrookCatcher
Joined: 7/14/2014
Msg: 50
Online World Different From Offline
Posted: 7/24/2015 2:49:33 PM

If I had pictures dancing like that...I would have been way too dangerous in OFF line dating.


I know..right?

The only way I could ever look like that is if they had me on video slipping on a wet floor at the grocery store. Just sayin....
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