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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > 2+ months of dating then just gone???      Home login  
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 47
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2+ months of dating then just gone??? Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
Yes had that happen, after 6 months of no contact and he was in the area, could he come and visit?? Hardly knew him in fact. Another one after 15 months of no contact, and I had blown him off, but he was trying again. Delete and block......
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 48
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/10/2015 2:11:50 PM
Sounds to me like you two were not sexually compatible. That something in that department did not click.
Don't take it personal, it happens. It's not a "should I have done this or that different?" It simply is. And I don't think he was trying to use you or anything, since he waited 2 months to get in the sack instead of going after it on the second or third date.

Stuff like this happens. Be happy that it happen then instead of after dating him a whole year.
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 49
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/11/2015 1:21:03 AM

CrookCatcher - I am not hoping for closure or reconciliation. He is gone and even if he came back, I am not opening the door for him to do this again. I just don't go "deleting" people. I feel if he is the one who wants to cut contact, then let him do it.

I don't get this, either. He's already done some "cutting", obviously. Deleting someone from your Facebook (especially this dipshit) isn't quite the dramatic and serious task you're making it out to be. It's not like you're having him arrested. Damn.

It sounds like you need comforting. I'm game.
Joined: 1/19/2015
Msg: 50
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/18/2015 4:27:42 PM
OP I feel for you, I've been there and it hurts. Especially when it happens from someone that was dead set on 'good communication'...hah! Gotta keep on truckin' and stay positive....yet I say this as I still sit here waiting for "prince charming" to fall thru my ceiling...
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 51
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2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/18/2015 11:35:52 PM

We seemed to click. Saw each other very often. The time together was great. We kissed on our 2nd date.

Whoah! Slow down there Cinderella! Kissed on the 2nd date! No need to make a porno, moving so fast! ;)

A little after a month into it he had a birthday...I took him out to a VERY nice dinner. The next day he told me how nice it was, kept thanking me, told me how happy spending time with me made him, and that he likes me and really enjoyed being with me.

Okay, so a month into it, you two are a couple, going out in public, porking in private, being sweet & proper in front of others you know as a boy/girl thing, okay...

Fast forward to another month me we were sill casually dating.

Whoah, wait though. It's 2 months in and you're just casually dating? OK. Well it's not romantic, it's not serious, it's just fun and good spending some 1-on-1 time together. That's it. You're not a couple at all. OK. Realize this is odd 2 months into things if you're hitting it off like you described, but still just "casual dating" at the same time.

A couple of weeks ago (7/25 to be exact) we went out. Again...public affection. Even ran into people he knows and he introduced me as "his girl", which threw me off s bit but eh

How is that weird? I think you finding that weird 2 months in, not 3-4 weeks in, is weird though. Prolonging things even though, as you describe, seeing each other often, affectionate in public, birthday spent together -- is odd. Longer kept as "casual", but walking a walk that isn't so casual -- makes things Weird.

We go back to his house, and he asks me if I want to stay over. I did. The obvious happened, and yes it took 2 months for that.

Not so odd if it Were casual, but given what you described, OK. It would be more obvious that it would have happened earlier, but OK...

Went to a nice breakfast, spoke daily for the next 3 days. THEN on the 4th day after, I stopped hearing back from him. I didn't know what the deal was. I waited 3 days then attempted reaching him one final time. Failed attempt.


How does someone feel it is ok to do this to another person??? Any thoughts on this situation?

It's bad. But take the sex part out of it, though. It's actually kinda moot. You guys were in a WEIRD situation -- a conflicting one. Casual dating yet not casual, for 2+ months. It shouldn't be surprising that something wacky could result if you're doing the "playing house" as a bf/gf when you're just casually dating. But yeah, that was uncalled for by him. Crazy.

1. Drop him from Facebook. I know, you want answers and want a door open for him to talk with you. Don't. Fvck him. If instead of him ghosting, you caught him banging your sister, would you still keep him as a FB friend? Uhhh, no. So delete him from there. That should be obvious. Set aside pride.

2. Don't do quasi-dating anymore. :) Yes, it seems "safe", but it's not when done like that. The longer you're just casually dating, where you can feel weird if he says "my girl" after 2 months, the more that'll define What You Will Ever Be. If you want to play the "not too soon" game of closeness, you can't complain if you find out he boned another gal or started making Busy excuses all the time, you get the hint, it's kinda rude, but that's that. Ghosting though was uncalled for by him. But at the same time, you wanted Casual / Keep Our Options Open -- for 2 months! You were asking for this conflicting situation. Being Open & *casual* for too long is going to define things as all you'll ever be to many people (possibly including yourself, depending on who you're hanging with). If he did text/email you and said "Yeah, I have to tell you that I liked our time spent together, it as a nice casual dating experience, but I'm not that into you, so we should part ways," -- would that make you feel nice & chipper? Maybe right now, for an hour or a day. But the same feelings would be coming back -- WTF? Well, you kinda agreed to a situation that's going to give much better odds of someone droppin' ya -- whether they say something about it or being a ball-less jerk and not. :)

Next time: If you're seeing each other frequently, affection is shown, etc -- go steady about 1 month into it, not 2 months.
Joined: 8/17/2015
Msg: 52
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/21/2015 12:40:43 PM
Whatever his reasons might be, he didn't want to at least tell you. I'd say let it go and move on.
Good luck! =)
Joined: 6/10/2015
Msg: 53
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/28/2015 8:06:36 AM
Sounds like he just found a younger hotter babe and moved on.
Joined: 10/16/2013
Msg: 54
2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/29/2015 10:59:59 PM
Just a shot in the dark, but he wouldn't possibly be in the military would he? I hear about this kind of stuff a lot; usually the guy is pulled out of the blue at gets sent to who knows where and can't get back to you. I knew a girl dating a special forces guy; he got deployed and completely disappeared. Girl didn't find out until months later when he returned and was allowed to tell her.
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 55
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2+ months of dating then just gone???
Posted: 8/29/2015 11:51:10 PM
you saw the guy for about 8 weeks. Not long in the scheme of things.
It may be that your daughter was not someone he wanted to deal with.
It may have been just the conquest and he moved on,
or he was not feeling it was something he wanted to get involved with long term.

Some men think that once sex has happened the woman expects more of the relationship and when the guy disappears it is because they don't want more.

It is hurtful but you will get over it. Not meant to be and you may have dodged a bullet.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > 2+ months of dating then just gone???