Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > AGE GAP      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 22susie22
Joined: 8/12/2015
Msg: 151
Mind the gapPage 7 of 27    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27)

Susie

- Do 60 year olds really think 40 year olds are age appropriate? If so, then I guess they think 80 year olds are also age appropriate!

Why yes, yes, they do think that and so 80 year olds are.


Do you really think that, Charmin? The OP ( in his mid sixties) tried to message several women under the 14 year age cutoff. Just because he is cool with dating women more than years younger, I don't think it's a given that he'd consider dating a woman more than 14 years older ( 77 and up) but I will defer to the OP to answer that question.

Where you at, OP? Paging OP.


I am merely observing that I think 40ish women who will want to date a man his mid sixties who drinks more than three times a week and who is 5'5" will be rather few in number. Hopefully the OP will find a wonderful 40 ish woman who thinks he's the cat's ass.

Some will drink just as much and MANY will shrink (get shorter) as they age.
Not much room to judge eh? Again, refer to Walt's quote.


LOL...40 is a bit young to shrink! I'm 50 and not getting shorter yet.

Meh... old men want to date young women, that's their choice, I just think their dating pool will have fewer fishies. That's all :)
 ClooneysMentor
Joined: 8/2/2015
Msg: 152
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 7:16:22 PM
I've met some damn fine 60 year old women!

This cradle has no security ladies...
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 153
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 7:26:53 PM

You may be right that I took it personally


It doesn't help that after reading the thread on "qualifiers" and some people's opinions that they didn't want to read "I think, I feel, IMO, IME, Just sayin'" so much, and that they thought it was manipulative. I decided to try to drop some of those. It obviously has affected my delivery (or I'm not practiced enough at giving an opinion without them). It's not natural for me to write that way. People are just gonna have to deal with my IMOs and IMEs.

Just sayin' :)
 7seatac
Joined: 8/12/2015
Msg: 154
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 7:28:29 PM
The OP is 63 and 14 years younger is 49. Nothing wrong with that. Both more than adults. I'm pretty sure a 49 year old woman is "old" enough that he's not taking advantage of her. I think his main criticism was that he can approach women 14 years younger in real life and any dating site except POF. Many think this rule is silly bit know that there is nothing that can be done about it. And you know, to a 30 year old guy a 49 year old woman is old, really old. To some 40 year old guys a 49 year old woman is really old. Depends on who's eyes you're looking through.

Go find what you want and what you prefer. There are no rules and no laws unless you're a minor. Find who fits you.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 155
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 7:56:21 PM

Do you really think that, Charmin?


Yup

{quote]LOL...40 is a bit young to shrink! I'm 50 and not getting shorter yet.

I'm referring to the age group when people do "shrink"... the point is, is all part of life that we can't afford to be judgmental about or our options within the dating pool will really shrink.



I just think their dating pool will have fewer fishies.



and..................so be it.
OP may very well be quite aware of this fact, but obviously it's not stopping him. lol



The OP is 63 and 14 years younger is 49. Nothing wrong with that. Both more than adults.

^^^^^^^
This

it all goes back to Walts post................it's all in the attraction
 Bebedeleau
Joined: 2/25/2013
Msg: 156
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 8:16:26 PM
I originally wanted to comment on someone saying they didn't want to be with someone in a different stage of life as they are.

Personally, I prefer it.

I have so much going on in my life, all the time, that I wouldn't want someone going through the same stages as me. Think: midlife crises, taking care of parents, preparing for children's college, preparing for retirement. These things are difficult enough without both of you hitting these stages at the same time. I find that the zig-zag patterning of our "life stages" between me and partner are easier for both of us because the other (less involved) partner can be supportive source (emotionally, physically and such) if they want. It makes things a little easier, I think, and helps you be more fully engaged in whatever stage you are in. If you have one life to live .. I appreciate that I can focus on living it well, and not have 'combined' life stage problems overwhelming that.

I imagine the only thing we will go through together is the empty nest syndrome. Our involvement parenting wise is equal in amounts so I'm guessing we are both going to feel the "what now" at the same time.

Living my "best life" right now means having plenty of room for all the 'busy' things I have to (or want to) do. Being with someone "ahead of the game" and through that stage gives me the comfort and stability to do that because we are no competing for that time with each other. He's at a place he wants to be and I'm at a place I want to be. Some of those things are the same place but there's also room for us each because we are in different places. It's a nice base to operate from. I, in turn, give him an opportunity to be involved in these stages I'm going through ... or not ... or to whatever degree he wants to be involved. We have a 10 year difference.
 ClooneysMentor
Joined: 8/2/2015
Msg: 157
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/24/2015 8:24:52 PM
^^^
Interesting take on things.

I think a lot of us 45+ folk are focused on the 2 minute warning looming ahead and realize that any health or relationship mistakes we make now will not be tolerated as well as our younger years.

YMMV
 ThePigIsHereForEternity
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 158
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 2:33:02 AM


Some people here online seem to feel enough semi-anonymity that they sometimes revert to preteen behavior, safely behind their keyboards. It is soo very common in many online Forums for some participants to regress back to immature juvenile expressions and behavior. Things they may never say or do in person where the immediate results would be felt.


What a f*cking joke. Spare us the sanctimony.

Did you happen to see LH proudly share a recent story about how she gave a man dental floss at the end of a date because she didn't approve of his teeth?

Tell me all about how "mature" THAT is.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 159
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 8:24:00 AM

Did you happen to see LH proudly share a recent story about how she gave a man dental floss at the end of a date because she didn't approve of his teeth?


What's wrong with that? I dismissed a date because she slurped her spaghetti. It totally turned me off. It was okay that she did not use the spoon to twirl the pasta, but to slurp!!!!! The horror!!!

So, off with her head.
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 160
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 8:44:19 AM

Some people here online seem to feel enough semi-anonymity that they sometimes revert to preteen behavior, safely behind their keyboards. It is soo very common in many online Forums for some participants to regress back to immature juvenile expressions and behavior. Things they may never say or do in person where the immediate results would be felt.


Haven't been to many bars have you? I won't say anything online that I wouldn't say in someones face.


Did you happen to see LH proudly share a recent story about how she gave a man dental floss at the end of a date because she didn't approve of his teeth?


LOL---What ever happened to sharing Altoids?


What's wrong with that? I dismissed a date because she slurped her spaghetti. It totally turned me off. It was okay that she did not use the spoon to twirl the pasta, but to slurp!!!!! The horror!!!


Slurping is a good skill! I think you were LOOKING for a reason to dismiss her in that case! (deny it all you want, we won't buy it)
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 161
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 9:15:48 AM


Interesting take on things.

I think a lot of us 45+ folk are focused on the 2 minute warning looming ahead and realize that any health or relationship mistakes we make now will not be tolerated as well as our younger years.


I'm the opposite, I rather go through the growing pains together than wait on someone to catch up or play catch-up to someone. It's another reason why I wouldn't date a girl who's 18, she can't drink, she's just entering college, that in and of itself is a pain in the ass, no career, no money, she may or may not have a car, little to no understanding of how the "real world" works. I much rather deal with someone who understands what I'm going through and even going through it together than wait. The same with a woman in her 40s and 50s, she's probably so over that sh(i)t that she's not going to want to wait, the idea of having a family and starting all over isn't something that would be desirable.
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 162
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 9:27:59 AM
adventurejoe70:

What ever happened to sharing Altoids?

His breath stank like rotting meat. Tooth decay? Although I frequently handed him Altoids and breath mints, it didn't help. That's like a French whore using perfume instead of taking a bath. I leaned away to avoid smelling his foul breath.

Although he was highly attracted to me, the feeling was not mutual. I couldn't imagine kissing that. Repulsive.

"May I ask you a personal question?" I delicately asked. "How often do you floss your teeth?" Not very often, he admitted. Before we parted, I gave him dental floss from my purse and suggested he see a dentist. He thanked me.
 LLove2LaughToo
Joined: 3/5/2011
Msg: 163
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 9:34:21 AM

Literate_Hiker
Before we parted, I gave him dental floss from my purse, and suggested he see a dentist.


Oh no you didn't!
 ThePigIsHereForEternity
Joined: 7/19/2015
Msg: 164
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 9:43:07 AM


Although he was highly attracted to me


Oh, of course!



"May I ask you a personal question?" I delicately asked. "How often do you floss your teeth?" Not very often, he admitted. Before we parted, I gave him dental floss from my purse and suggested he see a dentist. He thanked me.


How sweet. You did this to be "helpful", and not to be an insulting smart ass to someone who didn't deserve it, right?

I'm also curious as to HOW this guy made it as far as a date with you considering your stringent "must be smiling in their pictures" rule.
 Moderate_Recall
Joined: 3/1/2015
Msg: 165
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 9:47:38 AM

Oh, of course!



You did this to be "helpful", and not to be an insulting smart ass to someone who didn't deserve it, right?
 adventurejoe70
Joined: 3/1/2013
Msg: 166
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:11:03 AM
^^What happened to Pig? Tall IQ do you know the answer?
 overunity
Joined: 8/16/2014
Msg: 167
view profile
History
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:14:01 AM
"That's like a French whore using perfume instead of taking a bath."

Or hiking all day and changing into a dress without taking a shower to go out to dinner.
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 168
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:14:18 AM
Quite often, people don't actually realize what turns off the opposite sex or their own shortcomings.
Would you tell your best friend that s/he had some spinach caught between hir teeth?
Would you tell your boss that the back of hir suit were ripped?
Would you tell your brother that he cusses too much for the woman he is interested in to be comfortable around him?

I wouldn't hand anyone dental floss, but I would say something explaining why I didn't want to take the first meet any further.

Pig is gone? Hopefully he'll be back in a new and improved edition.
 Whistle_Stop
Joined: 4/9/2015
Msg: 169
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:44:05 AM
Yes, I have declined a second meet but I don't need to point out the "why".....accept for one time.
I too.....dislike bad teeth or foul odors or liars.
I do have to say....I totally told a man, his lying about "smoking" was a waste of my time....when I explicitly
have "no smokers" plus he lied on his profile...as well.

As for Pig.....3 days is all it takes and he'll be quite p.o.'d(message me).....seems a few are playing "moderators" again.
I had Moderate Recall(Tall) add me as a fave and then remove himself...last week.
Another unknown...last night.....uuuoooohhhh...weird!
I scared....lol.
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 170
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:45:38 AM
Yes....Joey. Tall knows exactly what happened to Mr. Pig. ;)

And Ms. LH?

I am shocked to hear a self proclaimed feminist use the term "French whore". Tsk Tsk! ;)
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 171
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:51:01 AM
Can pigs really fly?


Would you tell your best friend that s/he had..............?
Would you tell your boss that ..............?
Would you tell your brother that he cusses too much.........................?


Yes I would, in a heart beat! LOL
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 172
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:53:35 AM

And Ms. LH? I am shocked to hear a self proclaimed feminist use the term "French whore". Tsk Tsk! ;)

Actually it's an old joke. I found it an apt metaphor in this instance.
 InnerGorilla
Joined: 4/1/2014
Msg: 173
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 10:53:47 AM

Or hiking all day and changing into a dress without taking a shower to go out to dinner.


I love this. It makes the skin a little oily and salty, yummm.
 kj521
Joined: 8/8/2012
Msg: 174
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 11:08:57 AM
Well...I guess what is defined or intended as a joke is just a matter of perception by the deliverer and the receiver.

Kinda like a young archeologist digging older women. :)
 Literate_Hiker
Joined: 1/1/2015
Msg: 175
Mind the gap
Posted: 8/25/2015 11:09:07 AM
InnerGorilla:
I love this. It makes the skin a little oily and salty, yummm.

I WISH. After hiking a steep trail my shirt is soaked with sweat. At the summit I change into a dry shirt to prevent hypothermia. In a wet shirt I immediately start shivering in the cold wind. Because I lack insulating fat, I must protect my core body heat. I never swim in freezing alpine lakes like other people.

With the extreme drought in the West, we raise clouds of dust with every step. I look like Pigpen when I arrive home.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > AGE GAP