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 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 451
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RANTPage 19 of 39    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39)
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 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 452
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RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 12:14:54 PM

"Why do (most) men [today] have to ignore the fact that they've been platonically friendzoned and then wait around hoping the woman will change her mind, rather than being man enough to say - yanno, I'll leave. "

I understand the motive -- we all do, even though it's a stupid longshot decision riding on hope. But here's a better question, though: Why is the woman hanging out with the guy 1-on-1, the guy she knows likes her and wants to still hang out with her? A social gal will realize not to do this by middle of college, and any reasonably intelligent gal will realize not to do this by 25.

Actually, tho sometimes we men leave as soon as a better solution arrives. According to my mother, that's how my parents met...Dad kept hanging around her cheerleader practice, and then when he stopped, she said, "hey, where did he go?"

Or a light-bulb went off and he finally punted the ball (gave up). :) Even though I'm sure the cheerleader wasn't crying her eyes out (although that'd make your dad save grace and look pretty cool in the end) -- that does help answer the better question I asked above: Many want the friend-zoned guy who likes them to hang around because they want to be wanted (due to lack of self-esteem).
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 11/7/2015
Msg: 453
RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 1:30:10 PM

But here's a better question, though: Why is the woman hanging out with the guy 1-on-1, the guy she knows likes her and wants to still hang out with her? A social gal will realize not to do this by middle of college, and any reasonably intelligent gal will realize not to do this by 25.


Mmm... Nope! Was in my 40's before I began to realize this. Still hasn't completely sunk in, and it probably won't until I have no sex appeal left whatsoever, and discover that I also have no male friends left.


Many want the friend-zoned guy who likes them to hang around because they want to be wanted (due to lack of self-esteem).


Wrong again. (My goodness, you're off the mark today.) It's self-esteem that makes a woman think she might be worth something other than as a warm hole.
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 454
RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 1:50:54 PM
Here’s a thought: quit offering your fake friendship to a woman who trusts you AS A FRIEND who won’t try to use her for sex.

Do you even know what “friendship” means?

Quit expecting women to think like YOU, and know you’re a liar and FOS when you are telling her otherwise.
 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 455
RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 2:47:32 PM
These court shoes can be tricky to wear when playing tennis.



Yes.....I know I have big feet.

p.s. The painting in the background is a favourite.

pps. My profile is hidden on here at the moment.
Yesterday had a man from the internet, who I have not met, not spoken with offer to be my friend.
Very nice I thought.
Then he added FWB.
I am still in the Top 100 of that site.
Will stay there till I use up all my paid stamps.

My delete key is getting a work out.

Ha... Even with my profile hidden.
My primary photo of the shoes only lasted 10 minutes before being zapped .








 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 456
Suicide Bombers
Posted: 11/14/2015 2:58:31 PM
To all the suicide bombers in the world.

You have every right to blow yourselves up.
In fact I welcome you doing so.

Just please do it only to yourselves and leave the rest of us to live in peace.

________________________________________________________

I tried to post this in the France forum, but could not.

________________________________________________________
To all our French cousins.
Our hearts and sympathies are with you during this terrible time.
We mourn with you.
Hugs.
 55catmando
Joined: 11/2/2015
Msg: 457
Suicide Bombers
Posted: 11/14/2015 3:34:57 PM
^^^ I agree, my thoughts are with our brothers and sisters in France. So damn sad.

It's back to square one in trying to teach the rednecks the difference between Muslims and TERRORISTS. Canada has committed to bring over 25,000 refugees and some think we are bringing over 25,000 TERRORISTS.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 458
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RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 6:19:23 PM

Mmm... Nope! Was in my 40's before I began to realize this. Still hasn't completely sunk in, and it probably won't until I have no sex appeal left whatsoever, and discover that I also have no male friends left.

Why would you be 1-on-1 friends with guys who've wanted you, you deny them and friend-zone them, but continue to see them 1-on-1 as just-friends? A lack of that sinking in? What aren't you getting? :) Young social gals will not "understand" due to self-denial but wants-attention, or not realizing the guy still likes them (as if when he did and she had to friend-zone him, him still wanting to be 1-on-1 friends with her made him Lose Attraction with her - lol).

Point being, if one's not getting it (the obvious), it's being naive. Many times driven by self-denial which is propagated by at least some level of self-esteem issues when it comes to friendships or the opp-sex.

Wrong again. (My goodness, you're off the mark today.) It's self-esteem that makes a woman think she might be worth something other than as a warm hole.

Oh, quite the contrary my dear. It is a lack of self-esteem when a gal wants to be 1-on-1 friends with guys they befriend but have to deny them / friend-zone them, but still want to be 1-on-1 friends (not group-friends) with them. Either that, or like I said above, extremely unintelligent or in self-denial. You're not unintelligent.

You may argue it's not a lack of self-esteem -- but there are many things in life we don't think are due to lack of self-esteem when they are (to some degree or another). Some of those things aren't necessarily so easy to figure out (but easy to deny out of pride). If it took you in to your 40s to Begin to realize the guy still wants you post-friend-zoning him and continuing to be 1-on-1 friends with him -- and it still to this day hasn't sunk in yet -- how are you, oh wise one, going to be a pinpoint whether there may not be an underlying self-esteem problem? :)

But I agree with you it can make one feel they're worth more than just sex. Having a guy who's just-friends may make them feel that way... although if it's a 1-on-1 guy friend who they had to put in his place and say no / friend-zone, but continue to see them -- it shouldn't take much of a person to realize that the reason this guy is Wanting to be 1-on-1 friends with you after being friend-zoned is at Least somewhat due to sexual desire (warm hole thoughts).
 Whatsamatterbaby
Joined: 11/7/2015
Msg: 459
RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 6:45:15 PM
^ See, I think it was my Dad's fault. He raised me to believe I was a competent, worthwhile person - someone who has things to offer that have nothing whatsoever to do with my gender. Clearly he destroyed my self esteem :(
 tangofish
Joined: 6/16/2015
Msg: 460
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RANT
Posted: 11/14/2015 9:08:04 PM
^

No, whatsamatterbaby,

You're good enough, you're smart enough, and gosh darn it - people like you. I like you.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 461
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Suicide Bombers
Posted: 11/14/2015 9:29:15 PM
I'm hoping that the french government catches them, then does away with them in short order. Perhaps they'd send them to Devils Island? Or maybe they pull out a guillotine just for the occasion? Instead of messing around with them like the US government would.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 462
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 12:41:58 AM
Returning to the friendzoning debate... and in my case, I have told him and others - if two people agree that they wouldn't be a romantic match, but have enough in common to be platonic friends - is that so bad? Yanno, bouncing ideas off each other and listening, talking and learning from each other? Do opposite gender friendships ALWAYS have to be romantic/sexual?

I know I have no 'social' group to hang with on my unusual childfree night (Monday) ... all my 'work colleagues' and other friends 'through running or teaching' are off with their families or other events... So until I set up a social 'group' - or stumble across one ready made... I take myself out to movies, dinner and other events, and if they are also available, I am also happy to meet with 'platonic' friends - as long as they accept that 'platonic' is all it will be. (same as I know that if a fellow I'm interested in 'friendzones me' then I have a choice to respect his decision and be his friend, or leave to find someone who wants a romantic relationship with me.)
I dare say that this is what people with self-awareness would call being 'grown up'.

Now if "I" come across someone here or elsewhere to whom I'm attracted - especially romantically with the prospect of a sexual relationship - and they are attracted to me - even I recognise I'd be stupid to 'friendzone' them. I currently have a couple of 'possibilities' gentlemen who have not been friendzoned.. however also not pressured to make any commitments... we just go out casually (without sexual pressure) once in a while for movie or dinner... when schedules permit. They are the gentlemen with whom 'anything' could happen so I'm leaving my options open.
 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 463
RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 1:30:54 AM
PurpleRider.
There are very few , I thought no circumstances, where I would welcome a guillotine.
In this instance and others of similar terror attacks I would stand in the town square and cheer.
Unfortunately, for people who consider blowing themselves up to be a good thing, I doubt a guillotine would be a deterrent.
Could create more martyrs.


Jessi.
I have every night free.
No children.
Work daytime.
So my evenings are my own.
Like you I take myself out to movies, dinner and other events.
There are many, many like us.

Most of my friends are married, have children and lives of their own.
Certainly my siblings have their own lives and we are scattered.

So like you I seek people who enjoy the same things.
We are platonic 'friends'.

Met one this morning.
A 30 year old man who greeted me with a kiss then showed me a photo of his 3 week old son.
We share a hobby. Him, his wife and me.
I am sure as soon as the boy is old enough he will also be involved.
 Hosch_bau
Joined: 11/11/2015
Msg: 464
RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 1:57:32 AM

I currently have a couple of 'possibilities' gentlemen who have not been friendzoned.. however also not pressured to make any commitments... we just go out casually (without sexual pressure) once in a while for movie or dinner... when schedules permit. They are the gentlemen with whom 'anything' could happen so I'm leaving my options open.


Do they ever get the impression they've been friendzoned? Are they aware that you're seeing others? Just curious is all. Glad it's working for you.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 465
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Posted: 11/15/2015 2:42:18 AM
To tell the truth,
I have no idea what their feelings are...
It has never come up in conversation...
As they are both only interested in casual dating and nothing serious - We catch up 'infrequently' and it's always in public.
The gentlemen have never made the suggestion of visiting their house as a date location
They have work and children/extended family commitments
They also know my commitments limitations (including having been unwell and trying to train for a difficult half marathon...)

Who knows,maybe they are friendzoning me???
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 466
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Posted: 11/15/2015 3:18:06 AM
I never did get that 'friendzone' horseshyt. Or rather, the complaint about it. I don't get or relate to the complaint about it. I think that even the term itself, and all of the logic and culture tied up in that and it's headspace, is a bunch of crap.

You like someone, and they either don't like you or don't want to pursue something "yet", then leave it alone already. Be a real friend, or don't be, and move the hell on. But don't just hang around hoping for some "opening". Don't create some weird "friendzone" logic-structure to frame it all in. And don't conjure up all kinds of "techniques" and rules of behavior to "avoid getting put into the friendzone". That's like the prepubescent pursuit of trying to come up with witty "lines" to "use" on women in a bar.

Plenty of people get together after 'just being friends' (er, being 'friendzoned'), when the friendship was authentic and with no ulterior motives (as long as one person just isn't so good at deception). But it a friendship doesn't become something else, then it doesn't. Again, you shoulda done moved on anyway, and either been a real friend or not at all.

But the whole "friendzone" thinking seems dumb and even rude actually, like only a "player" or someone who's trying to approach it all with "game" uses such thinking. Or people who don't have the right attitude about dating and relationships that they should have.

Yanno, for every guy that can't take no for an answer, there's a gal that eventually says...When I first met him, I thought he was a jerk, but then he just wouldn't give up and I gave him a chance

It'd be interesting to compare the two psychologies - this kind of gal ^ and the one who'd call this creepy and harassment.

Drinkthesun, you have me salivating. The last episode I saw was the one where they were corralled into the railroad car.

That one part will forever be one of my favorites. Has become one of the definitives of the main group that we follow, and of Rick: They're captured, with no control or abilities at all. Completely helpless and at their mercy. They have them totally by the balls. Yet still Rick says "They're going to feel pretty stupid when they find out; They're f-cking with the wrong people".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oORtfqsRIjw
 csillagjanos
Joined: 10/18/2015
Msg: 467
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 4:01:31 AM
""""Yanno, for every guy that can't take no for an answer, there's a gal that eventually says...When I first met him, I thought he was a jerk, but then he just wouldn't give up and I gave him a chance""""

That used to happen to me a lot, in the 1970s and 1980s. But it did not take months or even weeks... the whole thing was accomplished in a matter of hours. Certainly within the day.

People have become much more patient since the sexual counter-revolution set in.

"""""""""""""""""I'm hoping that the french government catches them, then does away with them in short order. Perhaps they'd send them to Devils Island? Or maybe they pull out a guillotine just for the occasion? Instead of messing around with them like the US government would."""""""""""""""""

You remember that famous speech by that famous, legendary, or perhaps even fictional person who said to the Indians of North America, "Haha, you can kill us, you can torture us, but there will be more and more of us coming over, haha, you don't stand a chance, haha," as he was tied to the torture-post about to be scalped.

What I am trying to say, is that you can't do away with a spirit that is backed by two billion people. You can't eradicate the spirit, the soul, the ideology, when it lives on in the minds of 2 billion really hurt people.

It was their "RANT".
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 468
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 6:30:29 AM
^^^^^ Just that won't stop them. I read an article sometime back about muslim terrorists, back in the 1930's I believe. The US army was dealing with them, I think it was in the Philippines. They were executed by the army, Col. Harry Truman was in charge. He had them buried in a mass grave. To deter others in that muslim group still at large- Harry had his men throw a dead hog in with the dead men. Why? Because they wouldn't get their 72 virgins and all the hoopla that was supposed to be given them in their afterlife, because they were buried with a hog. My solution- You're tried. convicted, executed, their bodies run through a wood chipper and fed to the hogs. Do that a few times betcha they think twice about what they're doing. Tell me- is that any more brutal than them walking into an unsuspecting group of people and blowing themselves up?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 469
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 11:34:21 AM

He raised me to believe I was a competent, worthwhile person - someone who has things to offer that have nothing whatsoever to do with my gender.

So guys who want to be 1-on-1 friends with girls when Attraction is his either his obvious or underlying motivator, destroys this concept? :) And as a side note, my reference to the self-esteem thing wasn't that one has to have a complete lack of self-esteem by any means.

if two people agree that they wouldn't be a romantic match, but have enough in common to be platonic friends - is that so bad?

Well, the statement's vague. 1-on-1 friends? Big difference between group-friends & 1-on-1 friends. They sat down and agreed they wouldn't be a romantic match -- like sitting down and agreeing that the most efficient route from downtown to the amusement park a half hour away was X/Y/Z? :) That usually doesn't happen. It's almost always one person Likes the other, while the other isn't that into them, and has to break it to them. The closest to your statement usually is when the person not into the other helps make the other think it's also their idea too, by pointing out their own potential flaws & how they wouldn't be good for them, etc. :)

Do opposite gender friendships ALWAYS have to be romantic/sexual?

You mean, do they Always have to have at least one person having some level of desire for the other? Almost always, if we're talking about them wanting to be 1-on-1 friends. It's almost always one person's attraction toward the other that attracts them to not be group-friends but 1-on-1 friends instead. If they make great 1-on-1 friends... if you're able to do that, it's the green light that you'd be a compatible Couple. So the question is: What's stopping them from being actually Dating? Mutual Attraction (or enough of it).

I currently have a couple of 'possibilities' gentlemen who have not been friendzoned.. however also not pressured to make any commitments... we just go out casually (without sexual pressure) once in a while for movie or dinner...

Yeah, that's dating in the beginning. For the first several dates, there shouldn't be pressure on anything. It's not being merely friends, though.

I never did get that 'friendzone' horseshyt.

It's actually quite simple. It's Not being into the other person, but wanting to be friends to at least some degree.

You like someone, and they either don't like you or don't want to pursue something "yet", then leave it alone already.

If they merely don't want to pursue 'something' Yet -- then they aren't friend-zoning you. Friend-zoning requires a lack of attraction to be more-than-platonic with the other person. But I will say that Usually when they "don't want to pursue something right now" -- they won't in the close or distant future anyway and are just trying to soften the blow to the other. :)

Be a real friend, or don't be, and move the hell on.

I agree. But the complications are that the guy will still want to be a real friend to her -- and will be -- But his attraction to her, which motivated him to be as close a friend as possible in the first place, makes things different underneath it all as time rolls on and she's meating other guys when they're 1-on-1 friends.

And don't conjure up all kinds of "techniques" and rules of behavior to "avoid getting put into the friendzone".

All that means is avoiding being Unattracted. There's always going to be techniques or strategies on what Not to do when engaging with women. :)
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 470
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 11:51:58 AM

ou like someone, and they either don't like you or don't want to pursue something "yet", then leave it alone already. Be a real friend, or don't be, and move the hell on. But don't just hang around hoping for some "opening". Don't create some weird "friendzone" logic-structure to frame it all in. And don't conjure up all kinds of "techniques" and rules of behavior to "avoid getting put into the friendzone". That's like the prepubescent pursuit of trying to come up with witty "lines" to "use" on women in a bar.

Plenty of people get together after 'just being friends' (er, being 'friendzoned'), when the friendship was authentic and with no ulterior motives (as long as one person just isn't so good at deception). But it a friendship doesn't become something else, then it doesn't. Again, you shoulda done moved on anyway, and either been a real friend or not at all.

But the whole "friendzone" thinking seems dumb and even rude actually, like only a "player" or someone who's trying to approach it all with "game" uses such thinking. Or people who don't have the right attitude about dating and relationships that they should have.


I agree with this, the problem is society has been conditioned to think the opposite for so long now to the point that some women are confused when I treat them like friends even though that's what they wanted.
 csillagjanos
Joined: 10/18/2015
Msg: 471
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 12:40:54 PM
Purplerider, you'd just be throwing oil on the fire. The bitterness can't be stopped by brutal violence. You are proposing that we step up the cruelty of the violence. That will, my friend, breed nothing but even more violence.

These people are really pissed off in a major sort of way. They commit suicide to kill us. Are YOU pissed off enough to commit suicide to kill some of them? I don't think so. When you get to that stage, you'll see their point.

You can argue that they are promised to go to heaven, and you are promised to go to hell (as a Christian?) if you commit suicide. But suicide is not viewed by anyone as a purely religions act alone, it is also a biological, psychological act, and it's not easy, believe me.

You want to punish them to submission. Well, Hitler's Nazis did that to the Jews, and look at Naziism now. You may be somewhat successful by punishing them, but they will never submit. And woe to you when they develop more power than we do.

You see, we got the guns, but they got the numbers. We fly to their countries and bomb the shyt out of them and their culture. They send suicide missionaries and blow us up. I see no difference or moral upper-hand in the actions of either of us. You don't have more right to kill them and feed them to pigs than they have to infiltrate our countries and blow us up. The RIGHT to do this becomes a moot question -- it's not who has the moral right to do so, but who has the capacity to do so. That is war.

Your solution leads to war. And war is hell.
------------------------
Quoted from Purplerider: """""My solution- You're tried. convicted, executed, their bodies run through a wood chipper and fed to the hogs.""""

Not very Christian of you, I'd say.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 472
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RANT
Posted: 11/15/2015 12:57:26 PM

Usually when they "don't want to pursue something right now" -- they won't in the close or distant future anyway and are just trying to soften the blow to the other. :)


This lady tells it like it is...
"I'm not sexually attracted to you... I could learn a lot from you and I'm happy to hang out doing stuff, but if you want something more that includes romantic love and sex, I'm not your gal. "
 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 473
RANT
Posted: 11/16/2015 11:07:55 AM
AUTOMATIC SELF FLUSHING TOILETS
I am at the airport, use the facilities.
Stand up and WHOOSH.
All automatic.

Scared the ..... out of me. Or would have had I not just used the toilet.

What has the world come to when we cannot be trusted to flush a toilet!!!!
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 474
RANT
Posted: 11/16/2015 11:20:25 AM
What's worse is the automatic flushing toilets/urinals, paired with taps that you have to turn on by hand.

I can stand there stupidly with my hands under the tap for minutes before I catch on.
 PenelopeLeChat
Joined: 7/29/2014
Msg: 475
RANT
Posted: 11/16/2015 12:08:49 PM
Don't panic until you see the ones that flush and then wash the seat! I was trying to juggle my luggage in the tiny stall, figure out why the toilet was making all the extra noise after the auto flush and get my clothes adjusted all at the same time. Geez, when did peeing become so high tech?

halftime, my thing is that I never know if I have to crank, twist, turn, wave or pull for the hand towels. I had an electric hand blow dryer short out when I pushed the button once and since then I am leery to push electric buttons.

Le Pew

This also brings up a rant on people who don't wash their hands after using the facilities. I dropped a doctor in an upscale area of Toronto who had a staff member leave w/o benefit of soap and water. ICK!
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