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 2whiteangoras
Joined: 8/6/2014
Msg: 187
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men and wanting nothing seriousPage 9 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)

bamagrl68 2whiteangoras- But, what did he do that was bullying?
I must have missed it?

I think that I used the wrong word. Confrontational perhaps?

Why DON'T you put yourself first?
That's NOT selfish, who knows your needs and wants better than YOU do?

Just the way I have always been. Of course I know my needs and wants. I just prefer putting them first. I will get what I need and want as the relationship grows. Though, I do thank you for your concern as I do know there are many women/men that feel they HAVE to put others first I don't feel that way. :)

I also don't look at it as a contest.

I quit giving up who I am a long time ago. Probably why I'm here. LOL I'm not really sure of how to word it.

And yes, I did say there is grey as well. That's why I don't have a problem looking at relationships/life the way I do. I'm very happy and comfortable with who I am. Of course I would enjoy being able to share that with another person and only time will tell. :)

It's fine to agree with some of what I say and not with other parts. I'm the same way. We are all individuals and we don't have to think exactly the same. I think life would be very boring if we did. LOL
 yourstillhere
Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 188
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/5/2015 3:19:38 PM

Then we guess you'll just have to change it back after this experiment is done.....


This isnt an experiment, I really did decide to look for someone again.
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 189
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/5/2015 5:13:30 PM
Oh grow up and quit with your conspiracy theories. I didn’t delete him or report him or anything else. Pig was having heavy “debates” with others on several threads. He hijacked a guy’s profile review to declare how worthless, etc. they are, insulting everyone who offers reviews. You might want to actually follow what’s going on before you spout off.
I have just as much right as anyone else to post MY opinion.

Edit


I'm as pro-1st Amendment as anybody, but I don't believe his removal had anything to do with what was going on within this thread.


Agree. He went on a posting rampage as if he was looking for trouble.

“Wednsday” has been trying to get my attention for days.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 190
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/6/2015 12:39:41 PM
2white, I'm not trying to pick on ya or anything, but I wanted to read thru all the bru-ha-ha that went on here...

Actually, I never said I waited two years for sex.

Actually, you pretty much did -- definitely in context:


Treating sex like a reward for being a "good little boy" is pretty damn sickening. How many women are going to stick around for 2-3 months if a man is denying her something *she* wants as some sort of "test"??
And to answer your question from my point of view? I waited 2 years. And I never saw anything as a test. It's just the way things were.

I agree it's not necessarily some sort of conscious 'test'. But if things drag on for months/years where one's not giving in to anything important (a level of intimacy and/or level of seriousness) but still wanting to stick around while holding it back -- they're either testing the waters way too long OR there was nothing to be had in the first place but the other person was fooling themselves that there could be.

So you waited 2 years to be serious in what way -- and what were you? Was it 'just' a guy friend, and how close? Anything non-platonic occur, and was that once-in-a-great-while or rather frequent throughout to make it more than just-friends? Etc etc. Your situation requires specifics, and less vagueness -- otherwise you or someone else can just change the definition on what the situation and what "it" was entirely for their own argument sake. One can change the story a lot, in terms of what one went thru, etc. In this case, the devil's in the details and in more than just mere details that's not offered! :)
 sailinges
Joined: 11/3/2015
Msg: 191
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/6/2015 12:41:59 PM
This deletion stuff is interesting. Even alligators have more integrity.
Case in point. Tonya Harding was not up to the competition and so tried to take out Nancy Kerrigan's knees.
Did any male basketball player ever try to take out Michael Jordan's knees his entire career? Even once?
 sailinges
Joined: 11/3/2015
Msg: 192
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/6/2015 12:45:30 PM

I simply don't understand why people keep getting reported for having a difference of opinion. What's the point of having an open forum, if we can't debate civilly?

We shouldn't suppress people's right to express their opinions.


I agree, but if you are a loser, you do worse . . . ad hominem attacks come to mind.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 193
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/6/2015 5:25:46 PM
Tonya Harding was a nasty piece of work and that sort of person comes in both sexes. Just citing one example proves nothing. i.e. Michael Jordan. I am sure plenty of male competitors have tried to sabotage others or worse.
 2whiteangoras
Joined: 8/6/2014
Msg: 194
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/6/2015 9:27:39 PM

So you waited 2 years to be serious in what way -- and what were you? Was it 'just' a guy friend, and how close? Anything non-platonic occur, and was that once-in-a-great-while or rather frequent throughout to make it more than just-friends? Etc etc. Your situation requires specifics, and less vagueness -- otherwise you or someone else can just change the definition on what the situation and what "it" was entirely for their own argument sake. One can change the story a lot, in terms of what one went thru, etc. In this case, the devil's in the details and in more than just mere details that's not offered! :)

I was being vague because I'm not telling strangers ALL the details. That's personal. And if you look at my statements, I never ACTUALLY said in print that I waited 2 years for sex. That was just that one guys interpretation of what I said. He was the one that said I waited 2 years for sex. Not I.


How many women are going to stick around for 2-3 months if a man is denying her something *she* wants as some sort of "test"??

This is what "SHE WANTS". Not necessarily meaning she is looking ONLY for sex. This thread was about "men and wanting nothing serious" which actually turned out about men/women not sticking around if they didn't get sex in the first few dates to a few months. I waited 2 years for something 'else'. It never came but that is ok. I WAS looking for something but I didn't give up in the first few months. I just wanted to show that to some women (well to me any way), don't know about men since I'm not one, that from MY point of few, any one can wait a lot longer for something if THEY want to.

Men and women can think for themselves and they can wait/not wait depending on their own feelings and views.

I think it all boils down to the individual. How strong is that feeling of getting what he/she wants and how long are THEY willing to wait for it. There is no right nor wrong answer. Everyone on here can debate till the end of time and there will still be so many answers.

For me: Depends on what I am looking for and how long am 'I' willing to wait for it. That's all I can answer to. I can't speak for others. As I said, the longest I have waited for something 'I' wanted from a guy was 2 years. (not sex)

And any guy wanting something from me before 'I' am ready is NOT the right guy for me. I may do something on the second date, maybe not. But when I feel the time is right for 'ME' for anything pertaining to the relationship then he will definitely know.

If you or anyone else feel what I have said here is 'vague' I can't help how you/they view my point of view. It's mine and this is the clearest I can be.

norwegianguy456 And no, I don't feel you are 'picking' on me. LOL
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 195
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/8/2015 11:16:32 AM
Well, my lady and her wolf just left, after about 80 hours of catching up...

Not sure how, but she looked like she was still 20. If anything... she is an 11 1/2 now.
We picked up like we had never set down.
Hours and hours of loving her... how did I forget what that is like?

Neither one of us has been looking for serious, but maybe now we are.
Maybe now we are ready? She has woken a sleeping giant.. like no one ever has.
Love makes little sense to me. But she makes perfect sense.

Is waiting 18 years serious enough?
Does that even happen? We must be strange...

Well, I'm strange. She is wonder woman.

Oh.. she asked me to break a high handed stud, to keep me busy and exhausted.
I think that is a damn fine idea... can't wait till spring roundup.
 JujuO12
Joined: 8/18/2015
Msg: 196
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/8/2015 11:46:49 AM

Here is my take on the "intent" choices.

What I would mean if I had any desire to date:
I'm looking for casual dating / no commitment - Doesn't want a relationship of any kind, just a hump and dump.
I want to date but nothing serious - This would be seeking friendship, no romantic demands (possibly a FWB).
I want a relationship - For me, this would be a romantic relationship (where romantic doesn't mean pandering to the woman's ego).
I am putting in serious effort to find someone - Sounds like I am needy and will pander/kowtow to women.
I am serious and I want to find someone to marry - Somebody please shoot me!

What women's intent selections say to me (woman speaking):
I'm looking for casual dating / no commitment - I want you to pay for my meals and entertainment.
I want to date but nothing serious - I want you to pay for my meals and entertainment, and I may have sex with you if I find you attractive.
I want a relationship - I want you to pay for my meals, entertainment and travel, and I want you to buy gifts for me. You must pander to my ego, tell me I am beautiful and that you can't live without me. I will keep you on an invisible leash. I will have sex with you if you do all of this.
I am putting in serious effort to find someone - The same as I want a relationship, but I am needy too.
I am serious and I want to find someone to marry - I want you to pay for my meals, entertainment and travel, and I want you to buy expensive gifts for me (including cars and a house). You must pander to my ego, tell me I am beautiful and that you can't live without me. I will keep you on an invisible leash complete with choke collar and you will be my beast of burden. I will tell you that I will have sex with you if you do all of this. If you fail to do any of this, I will be entitled to a minimum of 50 percent of everything that you own, and I will turn you into a criminal even though you have committed no crime.



My Gaydar just went off like a 5 alarm fire bell.
 8inscrew
Joined: 11/17/2014
Msg: 197
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/8/2015 5:03:00 PM
You are only one lick/taste away from from being gay, yourself.

Imagine a real 5 alarm banger...
 backcreek7
Joined: 12/2/2014
Msg: 198
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/8/2015 8:14:29 PM
omg ! I'm not even sure how to go about, approaching the serious. Maybe I'm " unlucky at love " as that old song refers too, col (chuckle out loud ) After being spoken for, from age 17 to 52 ~ holy moly, how to I approach a women to " just be friends " .... it's been quite an f-in while. Seriousness has its super ultra cool benefits & its super cool learning experiences. So letsyou and I ( male & female ) not give up, talk to one another ~ ya just never know ):
 tangofish
Joined: 6/16/2015
Msg: 199
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/8/2015 9:56:48 PM
Wow, you actually made a relationship at 17 work all the way till 52. I don't know whether to congratulate you, or feel sorry for you lol.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 200
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/11/2015 6:42:31 AM

I was being vague because I'm not telling strangers ALL the details. That's personal.

It's not like you're lacking ALL the details -- and nobody asked for that... but my point is, which I'm sure wasn't intentional but still an important concept that shouldn't be brushed over, is that it was sketchy. A sketch -- could be anything. Meaning it bears no weight in any argument/debate, as it doesn't have enough substance -- for you say, personal reasons.

And if you look at my statements, I never ACTUALLY said in print that I waited 2 years for sex.

Oh I did -- in fact I outlined it pretty clear in my previous post. That's what made me say something -- that you pretty much did, in context. And if you didn't and it was a miscomm, you have to draw out "details" (or what unfolded & how/why/etc) -- otherwise, it's retracted or "stricken from the record" so to speak. Again:


Treating sex like a reward for being a "good little boy" is pretty damn sickening. How many women are going to stick around for 2-3 months if a man is denying her something *she* wants as some sort of "test"??
And to answer your question from my point of view? I waited 2 years. And I never saw anything as a test. It's just the way things were.

Again, in that context, you were referring to sex. Not being a stickler, but it's more of your response that caused confusion, not his interpretation -- just saying. But that's neither here nor there at the end of the day, because Yes, it is about being serious. And obviously if there not even sex, as fully grown adults, it isn't at any notable level of seriousness. But yes, you can have sex but still not any solidified seriousness. That's just a necessary ingredient, but...

I waited 2 years for something 'else'. It never came but that is ok. I WAS looking for something but I didn't give up in the first few months. I just wanted to show that to some women (well to me any way), don't know about men since I'm not one, that from MY point of few, any one can wait a lot longer for something if THEY want to.

... what WAS missing then? Nobody's asking you to say his name for crying out loud. Or yours either! In fact, that's the great thing about the forums... it's actually the other way around. It's stuff you wouldn't want to tell ones close to cause social drama about friends/family/ex's/etc -- but can here. It's more private here than in a local setting with local gossip as a threat.

Some people will "wait" to open themselves up with someone else / get to a certain level of seriousness (like sex, going steady, meeting the kids, going to family gatherings, moving in together, ring-shopping, etc). And some people will "wait" and hold out for the other person to open themselves up on something / get to a certain level of seriousness.

Sometimes said people are not working in their own best interest. Sometimes they're being a complete idiot -- to themselves and/or the other person. Sometimes they're doing the wise thing. There definitely CAN be a right or wrong in the realm of wise / unwise, stupid / smart. Sometimes there won't be a right or wrong, wise or unwise, stupid or smart way about a situation at the time. Everything and every situation isn't a matter of mere taste where there "is no right or wrong decision".
 BBEisBack
Joined: 9/16/2015
Msg: 201
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 12:52:20 AM

Wow, you actually made a relationship at 17 work all the way till 52. I don't know whether to congratulate you, or feel sorry for you lol.


A couple, who are friends/classmates of My older Sister, started Dating in High School. They've been together since at least 1967, if not longer....
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 202
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 7:55:44 AM
^^^That's an interesting contrast when compared to people who divorce because they say they grew apart. If someone gets married-especially at a young age-do they expect their partner to remain exactly the same over the next half century, where they never change their views and opinions on life and life events?
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 203
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 2:12:06 PM

Wow, you actually made a relationship at 17 work all the way till 52. I don't know whether to congratulate you, or feel sorry for you lol.


A couple, who are friends/classmates of My older Sister, started Dating in High School. They've been together since at least 1967, if not longer.... .


Several years ago, as part of a magazine article on aging in America, a couple was profiled. He was 102 and she was 98, and they had been married 81 years.


^^^That's an interesting contrast when compared to people who divorce because they say they grew apart. If someone gets married-especially at a young age-do they expect their partner to remain exactly the same over the next half century, where they never change their views and opinions on life and life events?


Yes.
Try being on the same page at the same time about everything for 81 years.

Also, their oldest child, an 80 year old son, lived with them.
He wouldn't do well on here with the "must not live with mom and dad" types.
 55catmando
Joined: 11/2/2015
Msg: 204
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 3:20:44 PM
My parents were together for 63 years, both were 18. To answer the question about growing apart, I saw them both grow, develope new interests, drop old interests, change. You can change from a conservative to a liberal and back again 20 years later, for example. Your core doesn't change, your "what makes you you" doesn't change.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 205
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 5:22:46 PM

Also, their oldest child, an 80 year old son, lived with them.
He wouldn't do well on here with the "must not live with mom and dad" types.


Some places have a high cost of housing, so it takes some people more time to save up to live on their own. Hopefully, the 80 year old son is out of the basement and living on the main floor.
 JujuO12
Joined: 8/18/2015
Msg: 206
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 7:17:56 PM
8inscrew How are those virtual inches working for you? Do you have to take a virtual Viagra to make them stand up?
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 207
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 7:57:16 PM
Juju012- Dayum'! :0
I felt THAT burn from here. :D
Better watch out though, he can dish it out, but he can't take it.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 208
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 8:12:44 PM
'he checks out her photos, he's going to get those inches back. She probably even has one of those cute little gaps between her front upper teeth (I just got back from watching the movie Spectre, the lead female has one too).

Perhaps long-lasting couples benefit from our past, where there was less selection. Back in the good ol' days, you actually had to accept whatever coffee came out of the pot, and sure couldn't make a deal about the color of whatever mug was handed you. Now we have a lifetime experience of selection--and you also get an award for just showing up.
 tangofish
Joined: 6/16/2015
Msg: 209
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/12/2015 8:40:44 PM
Yeah ... I'd let juju read my cards
 Rapunzel2016
Joined: 11/22/2015
Msg: 210
men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/25/2015 3:35:33 PM
deetristate


I see the envious and men that she has no interest in deleted Blonde Angel again. How quickly was it this time? Sad.

agreed. any further thought on my part are censored.

LetitiaLeGrande

Blondeangel can rise again and not have a pic up and with a different name if she wants to continue.

TY 4 the advice, but I'd rather die on my feet than live on my knees.

eternityforeternity


Ditto.

She shared a beautiful life event post, in which she wrote that she traveled the distance for love and a life change...
... and then poof.

Thank you. I am sorry my beautiful life event made somebody go "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!"

o0BrownEyedGirl0o


Re blonde angel:


How quickly was it this time?

faster than a speeding bullet!



I know this was rhetorical but I looked it up and it was after less than a few hours of forum posting. Joined 10-13, first post on 10-25 around 5 am Canadian time and off the radar when I returned home last evening (would have been around 4 pm Canadian). 21 posts altogether.

I don't know if I really want to know what goes on behind the scenes here. Maybe she self deleted?

No :0(

OHenry

If a woman wants to go dutch it is usually that she does not want to see you again and does not want to feel obligated IMO.

the corrollary is: If a woman never goes Dutch, she is dating only the men she really likes & wishes to see again

OR
IF YOU WANT TO GO DUTCH GO TO HOLLAND ;0P
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 211
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men and wanting nothing serious
Posted: 11/25/2015 3:44:33 PM
maleman

no I was not referring to STD's. However either there is a certificate of clearance shown or no casual sex for me, I can tell you. for those who want FWB that is fine, best to know upfront. Of course intentions can change once we meet someone and that will determine how we want to have a relationship.
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