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 Char675
Joined: 9/16/2011
Msg: 26
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Now What?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I am going to give him time to see what he wants. Our relationship was 3 years ago and I wouldn't say it was failed just a lot of mis communication ( on my part) but he always has never gone away lol. Whether it be liking all my posts on FB or texting me a silly pic of something he saw. He has come to me with problems with this past girl he was seeing.
He may or may not still be in love/like with her. No... I don't want to be a "filler" to fix the void he may feel
so that's why I told him that I would be there as a friend and if he wanted to see me then see me only if he wanted too.
I'm not saying last week was a mistake cause we the intent was to go to the beach. The rain was too bad so we opted to
stay there while the water heater guys came and fixed the heater. We ate sushi and talked and laughed.
Then there was a moment of remincinsing that led to us messing around. (hence the soft part)
I was ok with it. I do not think that he just invited me to get it on lol. Time will tell... Now, if I find that he did
then I will be mad and my feelings will change after that but, I need to give him this space to figure out what he wants.
I don't want anyone if they don't want me.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 27
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 10:08:26 AM
"He may or may not still be in love/like with her."

After three years, you're still waiting for him figure out what he wants? Welcome to the Friends With Benefits zone.
 Char675
Joined: 9/16/2011
Msg: 28
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Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 10:37:43 AM
no, I'm not a friends with benefit.
over the years we've dated others. he was out of state one year, I moved back with my ex for awhile due to our son having issues to see if that would help. so, no I wasn't sitting around waiting. but, we are in a position that we both are single now... Sometimes timing is not right.
 PennyAnte
Joined: 11/9/2014
Msg: 29
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 1:03:44 PM
You may soon become just a friend with benefits if little limpy works next time. I would suggest some conversation about being intimate before you actually ride the baloney pony.
 GoodVibes7
Joined: 7/3/2010
Msg: 30
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Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 1:14:14 PM
Why is PoF preventing me from logging in ??
It notified my email (goodvibes1378@yahoo.com) that I had mail, but when I try to log in, the screen just stays the same but with my password dots erased. I changed my password, & the same keeps happening. Don't know why PoF is letting me write here, but not letting me view my mail.
And of course it lets me view "Upgrade."
If anybody can help me out, please email me at goodvibes1378@yahoo.com ~ thanx !!
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 31
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Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 4:38:19 PM
the guy has erectile dysfunction it seems which may be an indicator of deeper health problems. If you want to retain his friendship I would not be blurring the boundaries with trying to have sex again, years later. You dated before and why did you break up?

You don't really know what is going on in his life and who he is seeing and what he feels for the former woman. You will need to give him space or you will lose his friendship altogether. Take notice of what men do and not what they say. He is obviously not wanting to revisit old territory.
 AussieNancy
Joined: 2/19/2015
Msg: 32
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 4:48:12 PM
.......Dear Mr goodvibes7. You posted the same question 9 times in 10 minutes and all in the wrong forums. People are ignoring you.

Best to put your question in the HELP section. I may have a simple answer as I have to do such every time I initially log in.
 Char675
Joined: 9/16/2011
Msg: 33
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Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 4:48:32 PM
He could possibly have that yes. As to not knowing what goes on in his life, yep I do.. We talk or text daily or every other day. We broke up for reasons of me being fresh out of a divorce and not properly healed etc... The former girl
he has been having problems with because he has told me. We are friends so we discuss things. Who knows if he wants to revisit old territory. If he didn't he wouldn't have said lets go to the beach. There has always been that underlying
flirting between us and a certain level of care we have for one another. Time will only tell if he wants to go there.
If not, then I will continue being his friend.
 SunKist_Gal
Joined: 9/7/2015
Msg: 34
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 4:58:52 PM

Time will only tell if he wants to go there.

Lol......girl, why does this guy get to choose whether he likes you for more than a friend and on his terms.?
Why is it OK for him to have other gfs and you will take him back at the drop of a hat.?
Why have you not moved on after years of waiting for him?
FFS.....Get a Life! Not anything I wouldn't say to one of my daughters if I seen her moaning over some loser...who is f'n with her head.
Your choice....
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 35
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 5:00:32 PM
Here's a possibility.

He always had the dream/ambition to make your relationship a romantic one again. Things were going according to plan, when the unexpected happened. He may feel he's blown his chance. And he's probably more than a little anxious that if he hasn't, he may not be able to close the deal next time.

If it comes up, you could take sex off the table for a while. Just say it's probably a good thing that things went the way they did since you're both trying to negotiate a new way of dealing with each other. Probably should keep it to "mature" rating, ie some nudity and coarse language. At least for a little while. Sure it's a white lie, but it takes the pressure off.
 AussieNancy
Joined: 2/19/2015
Msg: 36
Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 5:05:59 PM
You obviously know this guy very well and I sense you had an amicable break up. All I can say, (and I'm sure you are already), is to tread carefully, OP. As you say, time will tell, so give it all the time you both feel is needed in this situation. I wish you all the best.

Btw......apologies for interrupting your thread to address the other poster. I felt I needed to and I chose your thread out of about 5 to do such as yours is the most up to date thread. :)
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 37
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Now What?
Posted: 11/24/2015 5:16:35 PM
I think the guy is rather confused right now and is really mucking you around. You say you know what is going on in his life but I have to wonder..... Men can be notorious liars, you know that. I would not be waiting around for him to crook his little finger to beckon you for sex when he feels he wants it. Be his friend by all means, but really, that is all it should remain. Easy for me to say, I know.
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