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 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 1021
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I could give you that experience Mr. Clooney....for the low, low price of $995.00 per day.




****terms of service and limitations do apply.


So you would pay that much to be my sugar mama? I love it. Clooney, go for it. But be careful, you can't trust her with reptiles in temperate bodies of water.
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 1022
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 2:42:10 PM
Don't be silly, Mr. IG. One has to pay ME $995.00 to which I will then happily spend a portion of said monies on the gentleman......at venues of my choice, of course.

And Voila! You have the "Sugar Mama" experience.




Psst! Mr. Flman?
You'll need to exchange those sugar stamps in for US dollars....or emeralds. What can I say? Green is my color. :D
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 1023
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 3:51:08 PM


But be careful, you can't trust her with reptiles in temperate bodies of water.


Not sure what python handlers are earning these days, but $995 for a day of handling and risking personal safety might be a fair wage.

I'll sign up for that doormat experience :)
 flman2015
Joined: 10/3/2015
Msg: 1024
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 4:55:30 PM


You'll need to exchange those sugar stamps in for US dollars....or emeralds. What can I say? Green is my color. :D


I've noticed that green looks good on you. Let's get on a flight to Bogota and get you some "gota de aceite" emeralds.
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 1025
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 5:19:38 PM
If you insist, Mr. Flman. It would poor manners to refuse such a lovely gift. :)

And....I have never seen a real live crocodile so....I can be ready to go in an hour!

Scratch that....I might need a few days to pack. :/
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 1026
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History
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Posted: 3/24/2016 6:42:43 PM

*drumroll* .....................because everyone thinks they are an expert in other people's relationships. Same happens when watching a fight on TV, all of a sudden you want to tell the boxer what he/she needs to do, and then comes the critique at the end of it all about what should have taken place point by point. Like WTF? If you're an expert and you think you could have done a better job, get in the ring yourself and fight, and stop telling other people what they need/should do.

NG, you are past the point of making any sense, you're going in circles.


Rousey lost to Holly Holm not because of "karma" but because Holm is a nightmare matchup for her. If she wants to win a rematch (which may or may not happen since Tate just submitted Holm) she needs to change camps and work on her striking and incorporate said striking with her judo, her striking is very rudimentary and she relies on her athleticism and power moreso than her actual striking. She lost to Holm because her Judo requires her to clinch with her opponent and Holm was able to stay back, keep distance and connect at will pretty much without the threat of Rousey knocking her out. Rousey decided to stand and try and bang herself instead of using some wrestling to bring the fight to the mat. In a rematch Ronda will have to work on her striking defense and utilize a little bit of wrestling to bring the fight to the ground in which Holm is clearly outmatched.

I'm not a professional, I train in MMA but I don't professionally fight and both Holm and Rousey would kick my ass in a fight but there's a critique of a fight that's pretty common sense if you're an MMA fan and have seen enough fights in your lifetime to understad what kind of mistakes were made.
 AngeL_Feats
Joined: 3/21/2016
Msg: 1027
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 6:55:57 PM

because everyone thinks they are an expert in other people's relationships

Everyone should be FREE to make their own arrangements regarding dating & money.

If women want to go Dutch, they have that right just as much as a woman who doesn't like to go Dutch.

Smart women marched & worked very hard so that we would have rights!

So my right is no cheapskates, period.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 1028
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 8:19:56 PM

good Friday tomorrow

And Happy Easter everyone! Enjoy the weekend. Good night.
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 1029
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Posted: 3/24/2016 8:55:26 PM

Everyone should be FREE to make their own arrangements regarding dating & money.

If women want to go Dutch, they have that right just as much as a woman who doesn't like to go Dutch.

Smart women marched & worked very hard so that we would have rights!

So my right is no cheapskates, period.


What does this even mean? Only a man can be a cheapskate?
 Stellan77
Joined: 2/8/2016
Msg: 1030
who pays
Posted: 3/24/2016 9:20:58 PM

Everyone should be FREE to make their own arrangements regarding dating & money.

If women want to go Dutch, they have that right just as much as a woman who doesn't like to go Dutch.

Smart women marched & worked very hard so that we would have rights!

So my right is no cheapskates, period.


If I said that a woman's place is in the kitchen slaving over a hot stove all day I'd been called a sexist ***hole. I don't see why it's all right for some women to label men who prefer to go Dutch as "cheapskates" and "less manly." In my opinion, it's just as sexist.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 1031
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Posted: 3/24/2016 9:28:10 PM

If I said that a woman's place is in the kitchen slaving over a hot stove all day I'd been called a sexist ***hole.


Well, I could never say that since I cook so much better than about 90 percent of women. And because many women cook utilitarian dishes to feed children, they actually welcome that cheap skate guy that will cook for them. They will even buy the ingredients and offer their kitchens for the event. Of course you may have to ask for fresh spices and whether her knives are sharp or the usual cheap ones. You may have to demand for a cutting board and make sure that she doesn't use those food processor type of gadgets to cut stuff.

So you may have to tell her "I am sorry, we're going to have to cancel. I cannot eat microwaved stuff, or things cut in one of those little machines that were sold with one of those logos "as seen on TV".
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 1032
who pays
Posted: 3/25/2016 7:08:17 AM

I prefer coffee places because they are cheap, convenient and I don't have to sit with someone for more than 20 or 30 minutes I have no further interest in (and vice versa). I find that men get offended that I won't sit down to a meal with them on a first meet - and it's weird because you'd think they want to save time and money too before interest is established. If I have to I'll agree to dinner somewhere I have already wanted to go and would go to alone anyway, and then they are free to join and add to the experience (or not).

I get the line "I don't like coffee" or "it feels too much like an interview" also. And sorry, but it is an interview - there can be no romantic aspect to a first meet since no one knows if there's interest yet. My point here is I'm not sure you can win if two people have different mindsets about this.


I don't like "coffee dates" because I rather do something that's more exciting. But is still relatively inexpensive and low key. Such as Dave & Busters, festival, watching a game at a sports bar, mini golf etc. In general, I had a better time at these venues. Even if/when there's not enough attraction / interest for another date, I can still enjoy the activity for about an hour or so. It has nothing to do with money for me.



There'd be little forum arguments if the issues were just about the initial asking-out ones by the guy.



The dutch brigade would beg to differ.


There would be fewer arguments about it though. I think a woman should offer to pay something on the first date / meeting. Even if it was just the tip or a drink / dessert after I paid for something else that was more expensive. But it's not an automatic dealbreaker if she didn't. However if she still didn't offer to pay anything for 3-4 dates, then it can become a dealbreaker.
 Whisky_River
Joined: 12/2/2015
Msg: 1033
who pays
Posted: 3/25/2016 7:44:29 AM

So my right is no cheapskates, period.

Good for you!

What does this even mean? Only a man can be a cheapskate?

Oh shoot.....you're right. I never thought of that.....blurp !

Smart women marched & worked very hard so that we would have rights!

Lol.....Yes...smart women marched for rights but a few women missed the march or what it was about....imo.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 1034
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Posted: 3/25/2016 8:03:20 AM

I don't like "coffee dates" because I rather do something that's more exciting... Even if/when there's not enough attraction / interest for another date, I can still enjoy the activity for about an hour or so. It has nothing to do with money for me.

What bothers me about this kind of attitude is that it appears you're already set up to fail. You WANT other distractions present so you can change your mind and attention at a moment's notice. Having an 'out' makes it all too easy to bail on a person without even giving them a respectable time to win your attention. How the heck can any new person, standing there on their own, compete for attention with a noisy arcade or sports event on a giant screen RIGHT behind them?

Getting into a relationship is all about discipline and mutual respect. You have to learn how to change up your lives in some way to make room for this new person -- give them time and attention -- show that your are willing to reciprocate the time and attention that they give you. Setting up a date in your personal playpen makes them an accessory, not a priority. That's why I stated a healthy mindset is to assume YOU have to pay for the date - Man OR Woman - if other plans were not already made. At least that way, you know you are responsible for SOMEthing from this encounter.

So many people want, think, even BELIEVE they deserve a 'Get Out of Jail Free' card if a date is not living up to their expectations. They don't want to be remotely responsible for anything that they can't brag about the next day. It's that entitlement mentality - 'I deserve a good time' - well, no, you don't. You are taking a risk EVERY time you go out - whether to work, with friends or family, or even the grocery store - but for some reason, if it's a date with a stranger - people feel entitled to NOT have to risk anything whatsoever. It's ridiculously selfish and pretentious.

First dates SHOULD be about the person, not the adventure, and that means sacrificing time and attention - even if it's for one lousy hour and the cost of a couple drinks. A responsible, mature dater will have already accepted that deal before even walking out the door. It's not a very high cost to find love, yet there are so many, many people out there that believe they can, or deserve to, cheat on the price. If someone knows where you can get a 'coupon' or a 'refund' from a first date, I'll show you a con artist preying on selfish people.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 1035
who pays
Posted: 3/25/2016 10:33:26 AM
I agree with Danimal. Skipping the introductory process and going straight to some event or activity seems like the person is just after a wing-man/woman. How does that even work? Do you go to a place where you agree to meet someone you never met, look for someone who resembles the profile picture and is alone, then when you spot the person, do you say: "Hi. Are you Cathy? Let's get going to the event/activity."

The biggest fear in dating is a meet/date turning into an interview. But it doesn't matter if you go sky diving, bungee jumping, attend a sporting event, or something else beforehand. There will be an interview type of date at some point early on. How else would you get to know each other without have a Q & A session and getting some basic information about a person, who up to that point, is a stranger?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 1036
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Posted: 3/25/2016 10:34:51 AM

Why it is so difficult for these folks who are not happy paying all the time to speak up?

Actually, you're missing the point. The OP was OK paying for a while. The drama came when he DID speak up. :) It wasn't about a lack of speaking up, it was her Reaction when he did. He waited more than enough time for them both to get settled into things, but unfortunately she got bent out of shape even then. Thankfully, later on, she realized they were past the boy-meets-girl phase, and bought him drinks.

I don't think they should always be paying for house bills or dinner date bills all the time. Unless they are happy to do so and if they are then fine

I agree if two people are happy with a certain setup, their mutual agreement/contentment voids it of critique as long as it's within reason, sure. However:

(a) One can't say just because two people are happy in a particular setup, that means it's an ideal situation for people in general; it can actually be a bad example but OK with them
(b) There are situations, when too askew, that may be fine/acceptable early on by both parties, but wouldn't take a crystal ball to see drama ahead in it
(c) There are also situations when too askew that both parties are fine with, that many people are going to rightfully call shenanigans on (Girl taking 2nd job to support cranky BF's spending habits while he refuses to get a full-time job; hey, as long as that's what she's wanting/willing to do, nobody should advise anything, right?)

Like OP dated and Ten times he paid , why ten times?

Because he was just fine paying for everything for a while, as most guys are. What ever happened to as-long-as-theyre-happy-doing-it rule? :) He was fine paying for a while, like most guys, up until a certain point where he'd like to see some contribution once solidly past the boy-meets-girl phase. He wasn't picky about it, hence, it wasn't until the 10th date that he brought it up (since she hadn't naturally offered like many ladies do up until that point).

If he was feeling it was unequal beforehand like say date 3 or 4 or whenever why continue to keep paying and then moan about it...

He wasn't moaning and pissed on date #3 or 4. Her crazy reaction on date #10 that it was "Too Early" got him understandably pissed. He wasn't pent-up with anger up until that point to blow his top -- She was the one who blew her top for him even bringing it up on the 10th date (but thankfully renegged on the next date and offered to buy some drinks). I'm sure it was in his mind wondering if she would ever offer after date #x leading up to that 10th date -- but it was a good read by him to wait until date #10 since he really liked her and didn't mind paying in general (he just wanted her to want to contribute at some point).

Normal people ( and they are most hard to find) would offer something and usually after I'd say a few dates in-:)

Actually, many times it's still no bother, especially when the gal isn't motioning to contribute and he's not thinking about it too much. When the guy isn't picky and doesn't have concrete one-size-fits-all "ground rules" stuck in his head or anything, it'll be many dates in before it sinks in that she's never motioning to pay/contribute for anything. Again, it wasn't his blow up -- it was hers -- even at the end of a 10th date! lol

But in the end, she realized the err in her ways, and on the next date decided to (gasp) buy a couple drinks. I wonder how they're doing nowadays!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 1037
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Posted: 3/25/2016 10:43:02 AM

I don't like "coffee dates" because I rather do something that's more exciting. But is still relatively inexpensive and low key. Such as Dave & Busters, festival, watching a game at a sports bar, mini golf etc. In general, I had a better time at these venues. Even if/when there's not enough attraction / interest for another date, I can still enjoy the activity for about an hour or so. It has nothing to do with money for me.

There's one thing I know about the place I meet someone - if the person I meet is a match for me and we're both interested in each other, it won't matter if we sit on a curb together. Since the object ideally would be to talk and get to know each other, I would think a place that has a major activity going on would distract from that.

I would, however like to do that type thing if we started dating seriously and have a common interest in certain places. I just prefer to do things like that with people I already know and like.

If we're not interested in each other I'd rather just end the meet after a short period of time, honestly.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 1038
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Posted: 3/25/2016 8:06:00 PM

What bothers me about this kind of attitude is that it appears you're already set up to fail. You WANT other distractions present so you can change your mind and attention at a moment's notice. Having an 'out' makes it all too easy to bail on a person without even giving them a respectable time to win your attention. How the heck can any new person, standing there on their own, compete for attention with a noisy arcade or sports event on a giant screen RIGHT behind them?


This has nothing to do with wanting an "easy out" or setting up things to "fail". These venues can be beneficial to both people because it involves a mutual interest. Doing a fun activity on a first date / meeting isn't necessarily a distraction. Sometimes it's the opposite and improves the date. These activities can help a person that somewhat nervous or shy become more comfortable and can be used as natural icebreakers to start conversations based on what we are doing during the date.

If 2 people agree to the coffee date, that's cool. But no one should be forced to have a date at a venue that they don't like or use a dating method that ( in general ) doesn't go well for them. I won't bring a woman to a sports bar when she doesn't like sports. Just like a woman shouldn't insist on going to Starbucks when I don't like it.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 1039
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Posted: 3/25/2016 8:31:07 PM
There shouldn't be any insisting. If two people can't even decide on a mutually enjoyable first meet spot, they're not a match.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 1040
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Posted: 3/25/2016 9:26:18 PM

Even if/when there's not enough attraction / interest for another date, I can still enjoy the activity for about an hour or so.



These venues can be beneficial to both people because it involves a mutual interest.


How is it a 'mutual' interest to want an adventure date - in case the other person is boring?

Adventure dates are fine, as long as it's agreeable to both parties -- but your ARE stepping into it with a stranger, and depending on how little personal contact and conversation you have during the activity, you may know very little about them even after you complete said activity. It's a little difficult to reveal personal details about your turn-ons from opposite sides of an air hockey table in the middle of an arcade, or following each other on a bicycle on a breezy day.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 1041
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Posted: 3/25/2016 9:46:35 PM

How is it a 'mutual' interest to want an adventure date - in case the other person is boring?....


My point was simply that I wouldn't do an activity on a date that the other person doesn't like or vice versa. If I agree to go out with someone, I would probably already know a few things about them from our email and/or phone conversations. During an adventure date, we can take a break to buy a drink or some have ice cream. We can chat more then if we weren't able to talk that much earlier. I think the quality of the conversation can be better because of what I mentioned before.
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 1042
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Posted: 3/26/2016 6:00:24 AM
May be fun for some... I'm not big on activities, wouldn't enjoy an adventure date. I want to sit down, look at him and talk. Ah, being single spoils you, you get used to only doing what you want to do.
 ginghamgal
Joined: 2/13/2016
Msg: 1043
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Posted: 3/26/2016 7:33:34 AM
I prefer a combination of activity dates and conversation. Places like D&B or pool halls often have a bar section where people can get a drink and talk. I agree with South City that it can be easier to have a conversation after a fun activity because it can break down the initial jitters and awkwardness that can happen at the beginning of the first date.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 1044
who pays
Posted: 3/26/2016 7:40:08 AM
Does that mean if someone's profile doesn't have matching activities listed, they are a total write off? It's all fine and dandy if someone lists 10 activities they like doing, and find some who lists the same 10 activities as their interests, but life doesn't always work that way.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 1045
who pays
Posted: 3/26/2016 8:13:09 AM

Does that mean if someone's profile doesn't have matching activities listed, they are a total write off? It's all fine and dandy if someone lists 10 activities they like doing, and find some who lists the same 10 activities as their interests, but life doesn't always work that way.


Not necessarily. I can probably find out some of the activities they like doing during our email and/or phone conversations. Or when I ask them out, they can agree to my suggestion or make a counter suggestion. Having said that, if someone has very few or no common interests or we can't agree on something to do on a first date / meeting, then we are simply not a match.
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