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 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 260
LADIES - A Question of Height...Page 11 of 16    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)
Too tall is definitely not good as well - I went out with a guy who was 6'6", and it was sooo awkward. He was really into me, had a great job, was sweet, but I just couldn't get past his height. My head was in his armpit when we walked next to each other and he had his arm around me. Just so weird.

I've gone out with guys who were around 5'9" tall, but they were built like line backers, so it didn't really matter to me, because I still felt "small" compared to them. Nothing worse than hugging a guy and it feels like I'm hugging a little boy. Heck my 16 year old is already pushing 6 foot, so I just couldn't be with a guy who felt to be "less manly", for lack of a better term.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 261
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 1/31/2016 4:56:35 PM

Nothing worse than hugging a guy and it feels like I'm hugging a little boy. Heck my 16 year old is already pushing 6 foot, so I just couldn't be with a guy who felt to be "less manly", for lack of a better term.

I understand the concept of wanting a guy who's not so small that you can't feel 'feminine' around them, but the tall kid thing is harder to swallow. Being 40 something there's plenty of ladies in my age bracket with kids fully grown. Even if they are still 16 or living at home, they won't be for long - so if you're a petite lady in the 5'4" range or so, do you STILL feel compelled to find a guy taller or bigger than your 6'1" kid? Somehow, it feels like they are shopping for size based on the image in their family photos instead of real long term companionship.
 CynthiaSM
Joined: 3/29/2014
Msg: 262
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 1/31/2016 5:54:21 PM
I've dated men whose heights ranged from 5'8" (he said he was 6') to 6'6". I'm unabashedly heightist in my romantic relations (vs height is irrelevant in social or professional relations). I've found that under 6' doesn't trip my trigger and over about 6'4" is too tall to be comfortable. This is not because a tall man makes me feel 'feminine'. I AM inherently feminine; it is not something I become relative to a man or through a man's attention.

It took many years to realize my psychological trigger for height is because one attribute of the male archetype I hold is a man is simply bigger than a woman - bigger hands, bigger feet, bigger height. This is not the same as muscular, or bulky, or stronger. And "bigger" is relative to ME and I am 5'8" so a man doesn't appear bigger, to me, until about 4" or so.

do you STILL feel compelled to find a guy taller or bigger than your 6'1" kid? Somehow, it feels like they are shopping for size based on the image in their family photos instead of real long term companionship.

+1
My son is around 6'4" or 6'5" - I do not choose a potential date based on height relative to my son. Even the thought seems beyond silly.
 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 263
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 1/31/2016 7:17:11 PM
Some people get hung up on just part of what I said. I said: I have dated men that were shorter than 6 foot BUT (!) they were also built like line backers, so the "lack" of height did not bother me. And yes, I do not feel turned on by a guy who is not physically bigger than me in some sense, be it height or muscle mass.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 264
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 8:44:39 AM

Definitely. A guy should understand what league he's in, looks is extremely key & also natural, and what maximum league he could be in if optimized (much like if-I-lost-weight/got-in-shape-bulky/etc).


IMO, we should all understand what arena we are playing in and what that implies. So for me, it's not about leagues, it's more about the arena. Even different dating sites can represent different arenas.

I don't consider height a factor in leagues, and I don't really think as do most POFers that leagues really should have much to do with attractiveness.

I don't think you really think height is a factor in leagues? If you do, does that mean your find women that are 5.9+ inherently more attractive than woman that are 5.5?

League for me mean class leagues. As in, a super model like Iman I find attractive, but I am not in her social class even though my age is compatible. The " arena" with real super models is fame and money, which for them is gained by their attractiveness.

But I feel like I can date a similarly attractive woman that isn't famous.

I choose to date in arenas that favor me and avoid those that don't favor me. As an example, singles bars tend NOT to favor me. I did meet one LTR in a bar, but that was an exception that only happened once in a blue moon.


It took many years to realize my psychological trigger for height is because one attribute of the male archetype I hold is a man is simply bigger than a woman - bigger hands, bigger feet, bigger height.


I have dated from 5.0 - 5.7.

One of my longest and happiest relationships was with a woman that was 5.7 and 10-25 lbs heavier than me.

I have never dated a slim woman that was taller than me, so I don't know how that would feel. I do tend to like cute and quirky, so I think a woman's appearance / character can outweigh her height.

That said, I prefer women that are petite and slim. They feel more feminine to me.'

We talk a lot about how women want to choose taller men, but IMO at least part of this equation is the majority of men wanting to date women that are shorter than them.
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 265
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 9:10:09 AM
If he is kind, responsive, emotionally and maritally available, humorous, and upfront and honest with aforethought of my well-being with anything he normally keeps secretly that could negatively impact me if he didn't reveal it, of course I'll make exceptions with preferences. His height (or lack of it) won't make a difference. Sometimes, I don't notice their appearance until after I speak with them.

For me, security is what he shows me in his actions.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 266
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 10:06:01 AM

And yes, I do not feel turned on by a guy who is not physically bigger than me in some sense, be it height or muscle mass.

No, it's more that he has to at least be physically bigger than your Son -- that's what people are raising an eyebrow about. Yes, going out with a guy who's "only" 5 inches taller than you but built like a linebacker will do it, even though he's a few inches shorter than your son but Feels like he could take him, is recognized but not out of the ordinary with gals wanting guys taller compared to other guys (ie not merely them).

I don't consider height a factor in leagues, and I don't really think as do most POFers that leagues really should have much to do with attractiveness.

I think they do, as that's what how the term's used when applying it by people, for the most part. Basically, if she's out of your league, it means you don't have hardly a chance to pick her up. I guess she could be famous that'd make up for her looks, yeah. Of if he's out of her league, he could be famous or known as being rich. If she's a bombshell, and he's an average Joe, she's out of his league -- that's the more common, as most aren't shuffling thru too many famous or rich types when people watching IRL. So yeah, height has to deal with looks, and it goes there.

What I will say that's doesn't fit "league" so much is Type. And some aspects of looks that doesn't make one better looking per se, but just incompatible (even though incompatibility almost always are the things outside looks). Like you could have an OK-looking gal at 5'11" who likes wearing heels, and the guy's Good looking guy at 5'9". One wouldn't say she's out of his league, no -- as that Look translates in a certain outlier type in a sense. Or one could say distinct racial differences too on that, where that too has to deal with taste specifically, and not necessarily attraction for the masses. They don't see it as the person Lacking attraction, but attractive-wise, "they're not my type" -- so that wouldn't be a league-difference, which means "Better/Lesser Catch" in general -- not necessarily by social-class level. A guy who's part of the higher social class living in nice suburbs and just an average Joe in looks walks into a redneck type bar in bar-hopping with old friends... and a HOT southern belle in flannel's sitting there. Yeah, she shoots him down -- not a surprise, as she's out of his league.

Height definitely plays a role in that. A guy who's 5'5", even good looking, is not in the league of a gal about his height if flat-footed who's real pretty. His lack of height is lack of attraction, and most real pretty gals aren't going to want a 5'5" guy, even if he's decent/good looking despite that. He'd need some other thing(s) that stick out that draw her in, while also her being one of the lesser affected people about height and guys not being as tall as she when going out (heels).
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 267
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 11:37:07 AM

Basically, if she's out of your league, it means you don't have hardly a chance to pick her up.


So we would say, a woman that is 25 years old, regardless of her height or appearance, is out of my league?

And since the majority of women don't like dating men that are over 9 inches taller, women that are 5.1 or shorter are out of your league?
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 268
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 11:56:41 AM
HawkingJr. I was surprised you made such an erroneous statement when you said the following.


“Yep... plus my Mother was 5 feet in cowboy boots. Are you saying she was poison?”

Short women are not the genetic problem. As you can tell by the fact that you are 6 feet tall.


Children's height is a combination of many genes contributed from both the mother and father. It's not even one gene.

Or anecdotally, my mother was 4.11 and my father was 5.11. I have two cousins, one on my father's side is 6.4 and one my mother's side is 4.11.


That means, somewhere down my ancestral line, a short male overcame evolutionary progress and poisoned my family with his inferior genes.


Children have tended to be taller than their parents because they get better nutrition. It's generally not a genetic thing in this situation. Perhaps you or other mother didn't have good nutrition when you were a baby? That's actually more likely.

But this general increase in height is becoming no longer a factor and height hasn't been increasing.

It's a well studied phenomenon that during times of economic distress people born during that time are shorter.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 269
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 12:28:15 PM

So we would say, a woman that is 25 years old, regardless of her height or appearance, is out of my league?

Not regardless of her appearance (height being part of that). She could be dog-dog ugly and you could be out of her league. If you went to other countries, league boundaries can change, too.

And since the majority of women don't like dating men that are over 9 inches taller, women that are 5.1 or shorter are out of your league?

Like I said in my previous post -- tallness can displace someone where it's more of a type than a league. A 5'2" gal could look at a Tom Brady look-a-like (height included) and no, she's not out of his league -- and she will many times want to date him. Or if she doesn't (but wouldn't mind a roll in the hay), it's more of a displacement comfort zone. She can obviously find him Attractive, but it becomes more "not her type". Obviously rarely that, if he looks just like Tom Brady.

Point being: One person being below the other person's league isn't the ONLY reason why one would not feel drawn to date them. Heck, even personal preferences play a role when two people Are in the same league, even when one's a bit above the other person but they still don't want them. But some people HATE the term because it can imply that they're in a better league in life or something -- or makes them feel uncomfortable that some people Are Clearly Better Looking Than Oneself, in the market. That's what "league" is about generally (but again, not the only factor to play a role).
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 270
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 1:13:36 PM

But some people HATE the term because it can imply that they're in a better league in life or something -- or makes them feel uncomfortable that some people Are Clearly Better Looking Than Oneself, in the market.


I was asking about what types of women do YOU personally think are above your league?

Say womeone that looked like Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi who is 4.8 or Lady Gaga at 5.1, do you think these women are of your league because they are too short or you think they will feel you are too tall?

Or for that matter, are ANY women so attractive as you feel they are "out of your league"?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 271
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 2:09:34 PM

I was asking about what types of women do YOU personally think are above your league?

Okay. As a side note for clarification, TYPE is basically not about raw natural attraction in terms of what one can get in raw natural attraction. A strong indicator of TYPE is many times mutual. One with stronger attraction (which is looks outside fame/popularity or riches) is different. Yes, there are women of different TYPES that won't want me nor I want them... or I could want them because their looks (pa-dow!) trumps them being of a Type I'm not so fond of (and vice versa).

Say womeone that looked like Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi who is 4.8 or Lady Gaga at 5.1, do you think these women are of your league because they are too short or you think they will feel you are too tall?

Their fame would put them out of my league (well, Snooki? maybe not). One's level of league is Technically not on how they look -- but based on the looks of Others who they Can Get. Hence, fame/popularity or riches plays into the equation. Doppleganger of either? No, not out of my league. The Actual Lady Gaga? Yes. Snooki? She's weird, haven't thought about it -- but possibly (or not). Is she really famous much anymore?

If I'm way too tall for a girl, then it plays into Type mismatch if it's just based on that.

Or for that matter, are ANY women so attractive as you feel they are "out of your league"?

Yes, of course. Open up a Swimsuit Issue. Even the ones' dopplegangers who otherwise wouldn't be out of my league (photoshopped, dolled up, etc) would be, being a top model. Again, it's based on who They Can Feasibly Get. They could easily get a guy more attractive than me and very likely pass me by, so Yes. That's all out-of-my-league means.
 deetristate
Joined: 12/4/2014
Msg: 272
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 2:23:55 PM
Tall women shorter man is in.

Keith urban
Nicolas sarkozy
Mick Jagger
Salman Rushdie
Ethan hawke
Jeff gordan

More women will date a shorter man. Try just asking. IRL.
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 273
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 2:43:49 PM

No, it's more that he has to at least be physically bigger than your Son -- that's what people are raising an eyebrow about. Yes, going out with a guy who's "only" 5 inches taller than you but built like a linebacker will do it, even though he's a few inches shorter than your son but Feels like he could take him, is recognized but not out of the ordinary with gals wanting guys taller compared to other guys (ie not merely them).


I'm still trying to picture a guy who's 5'9 but that big? Like what kind of linebacker? And NFL or College? Because the average size of an Linebacker in the NFL is 6'2" 240 lbs. So she's talking about a 5'11 and under guy who's pretty jacked probably too muscular for his own body. He would be about the same size as a running back in the NFL but even bigger. The ideal size of a running back is 5'9"-6'1" 200-230 lbs depending on their running style but none of them are ultra muscular. We're talking body builder bodies if someone is 5'8" but 230 with 5% bodyfat.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 275
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 3:11:53 PM

Dragracer428
Do any of the taller men on the forums use the same preferences? I know I do, woman should be at least 5'5" or I would likely pass by her profile.
Some years ago I did date a woman approx 5'0" but since I am 6'2" slowdancing was a little awkward. Sex in anything but the horizontal position was out of the question.

No, I have never seen this as a problem. We are not in the sex forum, so I won’t go into explicit details, but I have never found a woman being 12 inches shorter than men to be limiting in ANY way whatsoever when it came to sex and sexual positions and …

I have dated women 5’0” up to around 6’4” over the course of my long life, and enjoyed each and every one immensely. I don’t even have a preference when it comes to height, and I find that I can be every bit as much attracted to a woman who is big boned and heavyset as I can to a much smaller petite woman.

I will admit to a strong affinity for a pretty smile, and long beautiful hair.


CynthiaSM
It took many years to realize my psychological trigger for height is because one attribute of the male archetype I hold is a man is simply bigger than a woman - bigger hands, bigger feet, bigger height. This is not the same as muscular, or bulky, or stronger. And "bigger" is relative to ME and I am 5'8" so a man doesn't appear bigger, to me, until about 4" or so.

One of several things that works to my advantage in this dating game.

dragonbytes
IMO, we should all understand what arena we are playing in and what that implies. So for me, it's not about leagues, it's more about the arena. Even different dating sites can represent different arenas.

I don't consider height a factor in leagues, and I don't really think as do most POFers that leagues really should have much to do with attractiveness.

I don't think you really think height is a factor in leagues? If you do, does that mean your find women that are 5.9+ inherently more attractive than woman that are 5.5?

League for me mean class leagues. As in, a super model like Iman I find attractive, but I am not in her social class even though my age is compatible. The " arena" with real super models is fame and money, which for them is gained by their attractiveness.

But I feel like I can date a similarly attractive woman that isn't famous.

I would agree. I definitely don’t think of myself as good looking, or attractive, or any thing remotely like that. But I do date some very attractive women, some in my age bracket, and others younger, as much as 20 to 25 years younger. Which surprises the hell out of me, to tell you the truth.

I believe women do want an attractive man. Fortunately for us men, their idea of what constitutes attractive varies across a really wide spectrum. For most men, that is not true, men have a much narrower range of what they find attractive.
 BBEisBack
Joined: 9/16/2015
Msg: 276
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 4:49:57 PM

dragonbytes
Or for that matter, are ANY women so attractive as you feel they are "out of your league"?



norwegianguy456
Yes, of course. Open up a Swimsuit Issue. Even the ones' dopplegangers who otherwise wouldn't be out of my league (photoshopped, dolled up, etc) would be, being a top model. Again, it's based on who They Can Feasibly Get. They could easily get a guy more attractive than me and very likely pass me by, so Yes. That's all out-of-my-league means.


As normal, you give some long winded reply, made up of Personal Opinions, presented as Facts....
1.) Do You personally know any Female Models that made their living, from Print Ads or TV Commercials?
2.) Are You Friends with any Model who has appeared in a SI Swimsuit Edition?
3.) Are You friends with them and can see their Social Media, such as their Facebook pages?
4.) From their Social Media, do You know who they Date & are in Relationships with?

IMO, the answer to these questions is No, & this is just another Post where You give an Opinion as Fact......
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 277
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 8:24:25 PM

As normal, you give some long winded reply, made up of Personal Opinions, presented as Facts....
1.) Do You personally know any Female Models that made their living, from Print Ads or TV Commercials?
2.) Are You Friends with any Model who has appeared in a SI Swimsuit Edition?
3.) Are You friends with them and can see their Social Media, such as their Facebook pages?
4.) From their Social Media, do You know who they Date & are in Relationships with?

IMO, the answer to these questions is No, & this is just another Post where You give an Opinion as Fact......

LOL, thank you for having such confidence that I could pick up these SI models and that they could NOT easily get a guy more attractive as a catch than me. But I'd have to say you're the one riding on personal bias against me.

Did you fully read my post? Your response was as if I claimed I Could Very Feasible pick up SI models and that they Can't easily get a guy who's a more attractive catch than I.

I think you're the one riding on personal feelings here, man. I'm just laying out realism, which I don't think anyone would argue against. The reason I mentioned it was to clarify what I mean (and how other people in general mean) when they say the word "league".
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 278
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 8:45:36 PM

Whether it's online or IRL, if a woman prefers taller men it's not going to make a difference.


I think IRL shorter men have a relatively better chance. Many people do raise their expectation levels and have more rigid requirements online because they have often more potential options. Plus in OLD, a woman may not be interested in a man if he is under 6 ft tall. In IRL the same woman may not even realize that the same man is 5' 9" or 5' 10" instead of 6 ft tall. Unless she is fairly tall herself.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 279
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/1/2016 9:11:34 PM

I think IRL shorter men have a relatively better chance.

I believe so too. It's less of a game of numbers and "Sizing things up", where mere inches are going to play a role more online.

As a side note about the proposed "9 inch rule", where gals won't want guys 9+ inches taller than them... when one looks at Match, one sees they put an emphasis on the minimum height, not the maximum height. Many at, say, 5'3" will set it at around a foot taller or leaving at 6'10", but typically set the minimum at 5'8" - 5'10". The minimum height is their main concern when you leaf thru.

I agree being 9" taller isn't so ideal for many average to shorter gals, but a guy who's the same height as said not-tall-at-all girl is more than non-ideal. IRL, the average/short gal being close to a foot shorter than the guy she's out with is common -- while a guy being the same height as said average/short gal is not. Some average/short women specifically Like what others may see as not-ideal, with the guy being 9-12 inches taller than she .... while virtually none specifically Like a guy to be as short as she or shorter.
 Nth_degree1111
Joined: 9/16/2009
Msg: 280
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 7:46:47 AM

My 16 year old son is pushing 6 feet, and it would feel weird if the guy I dated was shorter than my son.


Ignoring the creepiness of this, sons often grow to be taller than their fathers. If you were married and your son grew taller than your husband (which is presumably his father), would you then divorce him, because your son is now taller and your husband would no longer appeal to you? Just weird. As I and others have said, too many women won't think with their rational mind and give in to their primal instincts.
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 281
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 8:01:40 AM

Just weird.


Agreed, but to each their own I suppose. The woman I'm in a relationship with now has two sons, both slightly over 6'. She doesn't care. She likes to wear heels that take her from 5'5", flat-footed, to 5'10". Doesn't care. Myself, I love it.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 282
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 8:28:36 AM
Wow. 12 pages, pushing 300 posts, to say a lot of women like taller guys and some women don't care. That's as bad as some government reports that are a thousand pages long to make one point.
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 283
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 9:24:05 AM
^^^^ Not really. The latter, you pay for.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 284
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 11:53:43 AM

Wow. 12 pages, pushing 300 posts, to say a lot of women like taller guys and some women don't care.

To be fair though, it's not about a "discovery" of what women want -- it's the discussion of the concept and where it stems from (which bleeds into women being into looks despite stereotype they're not so much). And I will say it's more than "a lot" like taller guys, and "some" don't care. For at least reasonably attractive women -- it's more like a vast-vast majority more than prefer a guy to be at least a little taller than she (or around her height if she's pretty tall), and an extreme miniscule % wouldn't mind dating a guy they don't know who's shorter than she (when she's not real tall).

She doesn't care. She likes to wear heels that take her from 5'5", flat-footed, to 5'10". Doesn't care. Myself, I love it.

Damn! 5" heels -- that's a lot. If she's around your age (a notch past middle aged), that's especially surprising.

If you were married and your son grew taller than your husband (which is presumably his father), would you then divorce him, because your son is now taller and your husband would no longer appeal to you? Just weird.

Good point. A 23 year old son will many times be a bit taller and more athletically built than their dad. I can see a newly single gal who's in relatively good shape for her age to be more drawn to some extent to guys who are taller than their sons who aren't tall, and have wider shoulders than their sons whose shoulders aren't so wide... but if their sons are kinda tall, and/or shoulders are kinda wide -- and if said gal sees it as a benchmark... then it's more than just preference. It sheds light on the whole reason behind wanting-a-taller-guy. Not so much against they themselves, but to other guys in the room -- a 'catch'. It's about Looks outside the face -- just as one can say the same about gals.

Of course if a guy said "I'll only date gals who have at least as big a chest or hour-glass-figure as my daughter who carries it well," -- then the guy would be burned at the stake. :)
 BBEisBack
Joined: 9/16/2015
Msg: 285
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LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/2/2016 3:49:20 PM

Posted By:BBEisback
1.) Do You personally know any Female Models that made their living, from Print Ads or TV Commercials?
2.) Are You Friends with any Model who has appeared in a SI Swimsuit Edition?
3.) Are You friends with them and can see their Social Media, such as their Facebook pages?
4.) From their Social Media, do You know who they Date & are in Relationships with?

IMO, the answer to these questions is No, & this is just another Post where You give an Opinion as Fact......




Posted By:norwegianguy456
LOL, thank you for having such confidence that I could pick up these SI models and that they could NOT easily get a guy more attractive as a catch than me. But I'd have to say you're the one riding on personal bias against me.


If your IRL persona is anything like your Forum persona, then no, you couldn't sleep with them....
Although, you might put them to sleep, if they listened to your ramblings.....

I can answer Yes to all 4 questions... I think You put to much emphasis on looks & height, when it comes to who a Top Model Dates or has a Relationship with.....

It has more to do with what Social & Economic Class they're in..... Some people can cross Class Lines & others can't.....
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