Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 311
LADIES - A Question of Height...Page 13 of 16    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)

Men are the ones who make such a big deal out of it.

Women see an attractive man and think…he’s an attractive man.

Men see women date any attractive man (who isn’t him) and think….he’s tall, I’m short. He’s generous, I’m cheap. He’s a dirty scumbag ex-con bad boy, I’m a “nice guy.” Well she deserves to be abused by him because she didn’t pick me.


This is a broad generalization. I don't make assumptions about a man simply because he has a girlfriend and I'm single at the time. I would have to know a lot more about him and/or her dating history to form any type of assessment.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 312
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/14/2016 2:45:41 PM

No one would have to think about height if more humans moved beyond Neanderthal thinking and didn't make such a big deal out of it.

I think it's more of Attraction, not Neanderthal thinking. I think it's Neanderthal thinking when someone thinks/believes a shorter-than-average guy (but still taller and wider than she) is a weak choice for "protection", or makes her feel like he's "less of a catch" when caring too much about the "guy I got" comparison (high-schoolish issues). But for many gals, they don't make a big deal out of it, but it is a big deal when he's shorter than she. They don't make a big deal out of it because they don't think about it -- they just roll in the direction they roll -- attraction. But him being shorter than her, for many, becomes a big deal when they Do give it a try... even though him not being shorter than she but being below-average height as a guy won't so much for many when she gives that a try. But when it comes to just searching for potentials -- they just tend to skip over the shorter guys in the room (or in the profiles by filter).

You don't have to think about height if you approach gals who are within your height range.

Let me clarify what I said there: You don't have to think about height as an issue if you approach girls Whose Tastes are within Your height range. We don't know this IRL so much unless we hear she "likes" us, but on Match it has their height high/low preference almost every time. The problem is, you'll find it's not just as simple as girl-is-shorter-than-me.

That might not work. Plenty of shorter women prefer taller men. It's also not unheard of that a taller woman will say yes to a shorter man.

The latter is not unheard of, especially if she's tall and he's an average height or bit more tall -- or if he's otherwise clearly out of her league or something... or you see old people who shrink, and he shrunk more and was never much taller than her to begin with. But in a nutshell, going out to hit up girls taller than you, that you Don't Know who are at least in your league outside the height issue -- Good Luck! lol

Avoiding certain women based on height just limits your chances. Not all women are cut from the same cloth.

But it's not random or close to random. One can play the whole "well, there's people of different tastes," which is true -- but of people you're Attracted to and it's not Rare? What you're doing by not going after girls taller than you when you're a short guy is limiting your statistically waste-of-time chances. Do I want to spend my time going after girls where I'm batting .010, or do I want to replace that with spending my time going after girls where I'm batting .200 or better? Sure, take a chance here and there -- I'm not saying NEVER. It's always good to try something different here and there. I'm talking about how ya roll in general. Understanding what is a LOW % shot and what is a normal % shot.

Guys who get shot down a lot more than other guys (lower batting average) don't want to be going after girls who he'll even have a higher strike-out rate against. And yes, it does matter a lot psychologically. If striking out too many times didn't matter psychologically, you wouldn't even have this thread (or many others). :)
 irishgirl772
Joined: 6/3/2013
Msg: 313
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/14/2016 4:31:36 PM

it has nothing to do with wearing heels[/quot]
Because I dont wear heels was my point. I still like taller guys.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 314
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/14/2016 5:14:41 PM
Seems you are evil then!
I have been tall forever.. I prefer a taller Man. Doesn't mean I dislike shorter guys
Maybe people use the height as it is more socially acceptable than listing other things that are a lust killer
 Stellan77
Joined: 2/8/2016
Msg: 315
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/14/2016 5:35:56 PM
A while back there was a thread about big boobs and a lot of women said they would bypass a guy's profile who stated he preferred busty women. Yet a lot of women seem to have no problem stating in their profiles that they like tall men. I myself would bypass any woman's profile who had a minimum height standard, even if I meet the requirement.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 316
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 5:05:42 AM

A while back there was a thread about big boobs and a lot of women said they would bypass a guy's profile who stated he preferred busty women. Yet a lot of women seem to have no problem stating in their profiles that they like tall men. I myself would bypass any woman's profile who had a minimum height standard, even if I meet the requirement.


Sometimes I run across a women's profile that says she only dates white men.

I would never MSG such a person, they are socially obtuse, and likely to be obnoxious in other ways.

I rarely see the height restriction stated in a profile, but it may well be a preference. Easy way for me to dodge a bullet, kind of like a natural filter.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 317
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 5:21:46 AM

When I check male profiles in the local market, and close to 80% of men list their height ABOVE that national average, that tells me its more than just a choice to be dishonest - it's changing numbers to match the online demand.


Having been a professional statistician, this would prove nothing to me. It would indicate an area to be investigated.

1) I would guess 90% of men round their heights up, which I wouldn't consider lying, but would influence the average height.

2) I see quite a few short men in this area, there are a lot of Hispanic people living here, perhaps your area naturally has taller men. If I looked at the average age of people on dating sites in Indian Harbor Beach, you will find a lot higher age.

3) You and norwegianguy456 contend short men do better in real life dating. I don't agree, but if short men believe that, wouldn't you expect them to NOT sign up for dating sites and spend more time in real life?

4) They could by lying by more than a fraction of an inch.

5) It's well known that short men have more LTRs, so they aren't as likely to be activity dating. Tall men date more and have more short term relationships. So naturally more tall men will be on dating sites.

I would guess your observation is caused by all 5 of the above, it would require a lot of time, some money and access to data to really determine how these factors should be weighted.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 318
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 8:04:36 AM

I rarely see the height restriction stated in a profile, but it may well be a preference. Easy way for me to dodge a bullet, kind of like a natural filter.


Sometimes I see it on POF. But on dating sites where there is a section for a height requirement like Match, the min height listed is almost taller than a woman is. Sometimes several inches taller. One possible exception is some ( not all ) tall women. Their min height might be 1-2 inches shorter than a woman is.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 319
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 9:53:53 AM

1) I would guess 90% of men round their heights up, which I wouldn't consider lying, but would influence the average height.

If a guy's 5'6.5" and puts 5'7", that's not lying, any more than saying he's 5'6" when a site doesn't go by decimals. And also, your height varies widely in decimals by time of the day (morning vs evening). That's rounding, and fine. I would say a high % of guys under 6 foot are going to add an inch or more to their height. Maybe their high school graduation height when they're 30 (which would be slightly shorter than they were at that time), while many high school grad height measurements are like "basketball height" -- higher than it really is due to the long gowns. Stuff like that would be common as one thinks their height is.

3) You and norwegianguy456 contend short men do better in real life dating. I don't agree, but if short men believe that, wouldn't you expect them to NOT sign up for dating sites and spend more time in real life?

Seriously, I'm not trying to argue for the sake of arguing, I'm trying to enlighten you. Online, a short guy could get A DATE with SOMEONE, yes. But to match what's a common liklihood of taste? Not so much. Short guys online as it's well known, don't fare well online. It's apparent and obvious -- check the girls' height requirements on Match. A short guy changes his height from 5'6" to 6'0" -- huge difference. Short guys don't have it easier online.

You'd expecting them to sign up to try it out, yes. And there's also the fibbing of height and trying that out too. IRL they're not ballin' and online's at their fingertips. Can they get success online? Yes, some can. Point is, their options are LIMITED in comparison. It's a sausage-fest fight in an online site -- so it's tough to nab a Good looking gal for Most Guys. The lack of height thing adds to that making it a more uphill battle. That's the point.

5) It's well known that short men have more LTRs, so they aren't as likely to be activity dating.

That's not well known, no. It's that they have lower divorce rates, are less likely to cheat, etc. Due to their lack of options. Here's one blurb from an analysis:

Tall men were found to marry sooner in life, but were more at risk for divorce later on, as shorter men had more stable marriages. However, researchers note that the link between short men and stable marriages could be because they chose to marry later (or didn't have the option until later).

Again, it's harder for short men to find a quality mate. It's a more Uphill battle. Or they could go to Asia to more level out the playing field. A short guy may be more willing to Settle. Again, a lot has to do with Taste, too. Maybe more short guys lower their taste -- like fat people tend to do?

If one's willing to lower their taste for some "action" that their hormones are asking for -- yes, online is a place to go.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 320
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 1:12:54 PM

dragonbytes
Sometimes I run across a women's profile that says she only dates white men.

I would never MSG such a person, they are socially obtuse, and likely to be obnoxious in other ways.


I have absolutely no problem with a woman preferring to date white men. But stating it in her profile is a social gaffe. This is what you were referring to, correct? If she had half decent social skills, she would leave that unstated, and just respond to messages from men that did meet her criteria.

Kind of like the rednecks driving around in a jacked up 4 wheel drive truck, with a bumper sticker reading “No Fat Chicks”. It’s perfectly fine to have a preference, but it isn’t something you need to advertise.


dragonbytes
Having been a professional statistician, this would prove nothing to me. It would indicate an area to be investigated.

Ah, statistics. A very strange branch of mathematics. A lot of Probability and Statistics still seems counter intuitive to me. And I was a math major!
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 321
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 3:36:27 PM
I never did understand the "chuckleheads" who had to sticker their poorly-built 4x4 off roader vehicles with something akin to "lift it, fat chicks can't jump" or some other insult to the voluptuous amongst us. What we complain about the most, apparently is what we attract the most of...
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 322
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/15/2016 4:55:09 PM

I have absolutely no problem with a woman preferring to date white men. But stating it in her profile is a social gaffe. This is what you were referring to, correct? If she had half decent social skills, she would leave that unstated, and just respond to messages from men that did meet her criteria.


IMO it depends on how it's stated. If she simply states "I'm attracted to white men", no problem. But if she stated "No blacks" or "don't contact me if you are Asian", then I think it is tactless.
 crook_catcher
Joined: 1/27/2016
Msg: 324
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 2:32:46 AM

If it's OK for women to shamelessly lie about their fatness then is it OK for me to lie about my height?


Ohh....shamelessly no less. I wouldn't worry too much about the lying on the height thing. A pos is a pos no matter how tall he says he is.

Your posting history each time you come back shows a pretty obvious hatred of females in general. Do you attribute this to relationship failures due to your alcoholism?
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 325
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 2:53:52 AM
Haha! Mr. Crookcatcher!

Well now.....I wouldn't have quite said it like that but....

I would say....lie to your hearts' content Mr. Runner. I don't think it will cause the big stir you imagine. :D
 Lasthookbringsme
Joined: 11/8/2015
Msg: 326
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 10:01:57 AM

If it's OK for women to shamelessly lie about their fatness then is it OK for me to lie about my height?


I think that should be the least of worries.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 327
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 11:58:39 AM

If it's OK for women to shamelessly lie about their fatness then is it OK for me to lie about my height?

The catch is, if she doesn't look "Average" in her photos, she reveals that she's about 25 pounds heavier than her body-type selection right then and there, it's not the same as you lying about your height making you, say, 2 inches taller. UNLESS in your photos, you had yourself clearly standing next to reference points to make one say "Wait, this guy's not 5'9", he's a couple inches shorter than that..," which many times can't be done.

But many times a gal's (or guy's) photos will seem "Average" to match their selection, but IRL they're not. You don't know until you meet them. Then in that situation, yes, if they lied about their body-type by about 25-pounds over "Average" & their photos -- and you showed up 5'7" and not 5'9" -- she can't complain. Doesn't mean she has to LIKE you, but she can't complain at all.

However, all the Other Gals who don't lie about their body type, and you meet them at 5'7" when you advertise at 5'9"? They have every right to be p!ssed at you.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 328
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 12:13:29 PM

The catch is, if she doesn't look "Average" in her photos, she reveals that she's about 25 pounds heavier than her body-type selection right then and there, it's not the same as you lying about your height making you, say, 2 inches taller. UNLESS in your photos, you had yourself clearly standing next to reference points to make one say "Wait, this guy's not 5'9", he's a couple inches shorter than that..," which many times can't be done.


I've often thought about taking a selfie in the doorway of a gas station where they have those height stickers applied to the frame in case of a robbery to identify their height. The stupid thing is, even a slight dip above or below horizontal with the camera angle can make you a few inches 'taller' or 'shorter'.

I will say the idea that body shape lists with vague sizes -- 'Athletic, Slim, BBW' -- is kind of unfair. It really means nothing about being held to an 'honesty' scale. One person's idea of 'Slim' - may be 'Obese' in anothers' eyes. Height is a measurable, absolute number. ANY variance means a lie. If body shape or weight was held to a higher standard, I'd love to list TWO numbers - what their true weight is, and what they list on their driver's license or I.D. card. I think the difference could almost be a 'score' for how dishonest they are willing to be for the sake of appearances.
 SunshineGirl__
Joined: 10/7/2014
Msg: 329
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 12:37:31 PM
What kind of arsehole asks if it’s “okay to lie” just because he imagines others do???

However I do think this is a case of, if your friends jump off a cliff YES, you should, too.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 330
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/16/2016 2:52:25 PM

What kind of arsehole asks if it’s “okay to lie” just because he imagines others do???


So if a woman searches high and low to find a mis-labeled pair of jeans; are they 'lying' about being a size six when most clothing lines would put them at a sixteen? There's a reason why sizes of different clothing lines don't even remotely match any more - because they cheat on the labels to play off the fantasy demands of their consumers.

Face it, everyone has their own, unique perception of what is 'healthy' or 'attractive' - some believe they need makeup, or a specific hair color, or lifts in shoes, or a girdle, or 'minimizing' hosery to make them look good - and don't get me started on the women! ;)

Not lying may be morally right, but in the superficial 'look at my profile' online game, morals take a back seat to attraction and attention. Every. Single. Time. You HAVE to turn heads first and get noticed -- before you can ever prove 'honesty' or integrity of ANY kind.

Yes, I would jump off that cliff - as long as I had a working parachute - and knew how to use it.

"Fake it til' you make it." is the mission statement for almost every online service out there. Why? Because it is ADVERTISING. Online 'dating' is NOT DATING. It's a freakin' personals ad with message discussion. Real life is the proof, and sooner or later people realize that what's done or said in here doesn't mean diddly-squat to what happens out there, in real life. People get so messed up in early relationships because they can't seem to keep themselves from wandering back and forth between this online fantasy, and sh*t that really DOES stink!
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 331
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 7:08:46 AM

norwegianguy456 I disagree. It's been found time and time again in experiments and requires no imagination at all. Gals will skip over a guy based on his height. They're looking for flaws, snags, etc. -- and certainly more picky than IRL when looking online, generally speaking. Take a guy who's 5'5" -- his options drop. Pretty much all gals 5'5" or higher aren't going to want him. A very high % of gals 5'3", 5'4" who would otherwise be in his league aren't going to want him. Just like lack of body language cues, it's also an environment where the numbers are staring them in the face.


Really? Because I have NEVER seen anything like proof of this.

I have seen proof women skip over short men in real life just as much as they do on the Internet, I have never seen any sort of proof women are less picky about height in real life.

Experiments done on the Internet changing height only proves in a dramatic and obvious way how important this can me, it in no way proves it isn't as important or even more important in a face to face meeting.


norwegianguy456 Seriously, I'm not trying to argue for the sake of arguing, I'm trying to enlighten you. Online, a short guy could get A DATE with SOMEONE, yes. But to match what's a common liklihood of taste? Not so much. Short guys online as it's well known, don't fare well online.


Well, I am trying to enlighten you also.

It's no worse online than off line face to face. Online I have the benefit of higher numbers.

I can however make the case that online is a little better.

If I MSG someone, the first two things she sees is my profile pic and my MSG. Neither of which give any indication of height.

Then if she does look at my profile, it's likely she will see the pictures first, then check out the psychical stats on the profile.

So there is a small chance that she will be interested before she gets to my height. This doesn't exist in real life.

IF however I meet the same woman in real life, it's highly likely there will be other men around, all of which will be taller than me. Attraction is what, the first X seconds? If height is important, I am at an instant can constant disadvantage when meeting in real life. Unless maybe we are both sitting down next to each other!

BUT I am only speculating as to the reasons why, my experience is such that I would always prefer online dating to attempting to find someone at random in real life. Iwouldn't turn down a real life meeting, but it's more effort in regards to having to actually "be" somewhere I can meet someone.

I only used eharmony in the USA to date, so that is my only experience, no doubt different dating site yield different results. With eharmony, you can't scan for profiles you like, you depend on their matches.

Some dating sites use computer algorithms, when I didn't sign on eharmony for 3-4 months, I had over 600 matches listed, there were 13 ice breakers, I still have 118 matches I never had time to read, and 10 icebreakers I never read.

One thing I expect I do different than most men, I Never put in a distance requirement, so I got response from all over the USA and a few from China.


Sweet_DanimalSo if a woman searches high and low to find a mis-labeled pair of jeans; are they 'lying' about being a size six when most clothing lines would put them at a sixteen? There's a reason why sizes of different clothing lines don't even remotely match any more - because they cheat on the labels to play off the fantasy demands of their consumers.


So a woman searches high and low online for a Coach purse at a good price, and finally finds and buys one. Late on, she finds it;'s a fake knockoff?

Will she be angry or happy?


Sweet_DanimalNot lying may be morally right, but in the superficial 'look at my profile' online game, morals take a back seat to attraction and attention. Every. Single. Time. You HAVE to turn heads first and get noticed -- before you can ever prove 'honesty' or integrity of ANY kind.


If your goal is to get women to look and respond to a profile, then I agree, lie your ass off. It will work just fine.

But if you want a date to be fun, and want more than one meet, then starting off by proving you aren't honest isn't going to work out well.


Online 'dating' is NOT DATING.


Speed dating isn't dating, going to single bars isn't dating, asking women out isn't dating.
These are words we use to describe means to meet people who we might date.

Some women might expect their date to go like a romance novel, some men might expect a porn like experience, they will both end up disappointed. OLD, because of the sheer numbers of people you can get rejected by, only intensifies and magnify the problems.


Sweet_DanimalPeople get so messed up in early relationships because they can't seem to keep themselves from wandering back and forth between this online fantasy.


If people can't separate fantasy and reality, then they will be constantly disappointed. If I buy a new cologne, even if the advertisement tells me I will become Jame Bond, I don't really expect it to change my life.

norwegianguy456 I changed my profile pic to one that would emphasize my height by standing next to two friends. My wife says it makes me look like their child. This is what I would deal with in a singles bar setting. I would never use this type of photo in a dating profile, but it's a reflection of real life face to face meetings.

BUT I have no idea why so many men have trouble dating. I have been in LTR most of my life, if I want to date it doesn't take longer than 6 months to find someone to date on a regular basis, real life or internet, Asia, Medellin Colombia, or the USA. One method might be easier, quicker or more interesting than another avenue, but for me they would all work out. However, for me, novelty, exotic, new and different is more desirable, so I did tend to lean that way.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 332
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 8:18:44 AM

IMO it depends on how it's stated. If she simply states "I'm attracted to white men", no problem. But if she stated "No blacks" or "don't contact me if you are Asian", then I think it is tactless.

I agree that it's a social faux-pas, that, ironically, runs on stereotype to Not like it (assumption they're racist or less racist but uptight). When you're in a diverse society where you Only want the Majority race/look, it'll bring that. When you want a minority race/look, it'll bring another type of assumption/stereotype upon you too. Best not to mention it, as if the gal's reasonably attractive, she's going to get a lot of mail from dudes she's not interested in anyway.

There's a reason why sizes of different clothing lines don't even remotely match any more - because they cheat on the labels to play off the fantasy demands of their consumers. .... Not lying may be morally right, but in the superficial 'look at my profile' online game, morals take a back seat to attraction and attention. Every. Single. Time. You HAVE to turn heads first and get noticed -- before you can ever prove 'honesty' or integrity of ANY kind.

I would say this: Yes, it's socially OK, at least to some degree (depends on the audience), to lie about a specific 'something' when many others lie about That specific 'something'. The closer related to it being the thing that's socially accepted to lie about to one degree or another, the more acceptability there will be, and the further away, the less acceptability and more toward being truly Lying. That's basically how society works. :)

I think the WTF guys will have now and again is that more often the socially Allowed lying (err, exaggerations) applies to women more than men.

norwegianguy456 I changed my profile pic to one that would emphasize my height by standing next to two friends. My wife says it makes me look like their child. This is what I would deal with in a singles bar setting. I would never use this type of photo in a dating profile, but it's a reflection of real life face to face meetings.

Yeah, and I would advise against it if/when single for an online profile. I remember critiquing Hawking about him having too much of that in his profile a long time ago. BUT, a guy IS going to fib about his height, and put 5'8" when he's really 5'5" -- and wants to be on the same level as a gal saying "Average", but showing recent pics that she's certainly more fluffy than average -- then he should do what you just did. Not necessarily In The Middle of two notably taller guys, but standing in a door way, in a room full of people with taller guys and shorter women in the room -- to get a gauge. You can see how 'tall he is', without making it look so bad.

Really? Because I have NEVER seen anything like proof of this.

I certainly have. People report it all the time. has reports about such stuff too. I've done my own things on age & height, altering them (age you can alter on Match very frequently; not here tho). Surveying women in what they like, etc (not online) about height -- it, yes, becomes obvious. Looking at Match requirements on height alone points the arrow to obviousness.

I have never seen any sort of proof women are less picky about height in real life.

Women are less picky about Most Things IRL vs online. Hence, guys lying about their height -- whether to be 5'8" instead of 5'6", or 6'0" instead of a fraction over 5'10".

So there is a small chance that she will be interested before she gets to my height. This doesn't exist in real life.

Yes, if you get a convo going with a gal before she notices your height, and she thinks you're super cute -- as long as you're not way off her preference range in height (shorter than her, nor Easily shorter than her in heels and she wears heels) -- then sure. That's what ya hope for.

I can see where you're coming from. But if he's so short IRL that she'd be turned off and it'd overshadow his cuteness -- once she sees that very Low height, unless it's still much taller than she, she's going to be turned off by that. You can't count a "but I talked to her online for a bit!" as a win. On the flip side to that is the other way around, which is far more prevalent. He's taller than her, but he's a shorter guy. She's real cute and has Tons of options in her mailbox, thus, is in a hastier weeding process than IRL -- especially when a lot of guys lie about their height or when she like many are very picky about meeting a guy "online". So IRL, he doesn't blatantly stick out as the short dude in the room so much as he is taller than by a decent amount. Like you say about cute looks before looking at height online -- she mingles with him (being a friend of a friend) -- and sees his looks & charm, etc (better than typing) -- he's got a better shot. There isn't a ton of guys lined up like a POF inbox. :)
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 333
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 8:31:47 AM

norwegianguy456 I certainly have. People report it all the time. has reports about such stuff too. I've done my own things on age & height, altering them (age you can alter on Match very frequently; not here tho). Surveying women in what they like, etc (not online) about height -- it, yes, becomes obvious. Looking at Match requirements on height alone points the arrow to obviousness.


BUT there is no way for you to appear short in real life. THAT's my point. Find some sort of proof that height doesn't matter as much in real life. Because they have studied that also quite a bit, and in real life women have been just as picky. You in fact don't even have any personal experience with being short in real life meetings.

I agree with Hawkings, in real life the only time it doesn't matter as much is if you are thrown into a usually work situation where you interface daily. Not the sort of thing that can happen in a chance meeting.

My only disagreement with Hawkings is he makes it seem impossible to date, while I only say it's more difficult. And I agree with KJ, his main problem is being defensive to the point of sabotaging himself.

 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 334
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 9:10:12 AM

Yeah, and I would advise against it if/when single for an online profile. I remember critiquing Hawking about him having too much of that in his profile a long time ago. BUT, a guy IS going to fib about his height, and put 5'8" when he's really 5'5" -- and wants to be on the same level as a gal saying "Average", but showing recent pics that she's certainly more fluffy than average -- then he should do what you just did. Not necessarily In The Middle of two notably taller guys, but standing in a door way, in a room full of people with taller guys and shorter women in the room -- to get a gauge. You can see how 'tall he is', without making it look so bad.


I wouldn't see any point to putting up pictures so that someone could get a visual "gauge". It's enough that I put in my height in the height field.

And you assumed because they are taller than me that it was two notably tall MEN, but really it's a couple, a man and a woman, and I don't think my friend is notably tall, though his GF is on the tall side of average.

At least not to me, I have friends that are 6.4 and 6.6, now they seem tall to me. But I will have to ask how tall Dave in the pic is, I don't know exactly.

BTW, I would never suggest exaggerating / lie by 3 inches, IMO that is way to obvious, you might get away with an inch without it affecting your first meet. Like a woman that is 300lbs claiming she is average body type, it's way to off putting a lie to pull off.

BTW, another aspect to lying about your life, it makes for uncomfortable meetings and conversations. As the person lying, it's like you just committed a crime and see a policeman that looks like he is following you when he's not. A lot of people panic in that situation and don't act naturally. Unless you have a lot of practice lying under pressure, or you are a natural born liar, it's not very comfortable for most people and I think it affects how you behave.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 335
view profile
History
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 10:24:54 AM

I wouldn't see any point to putting up pictures so that someone could get a visual "gauge". It's enough that I put in my height in the height field.

I agree. But to clarify, it's IF the guy wants to have peace of mind of being in the right, when going out on a date with a gal who's not "Average" in the body type field, but shows that she's fluffier than normal. To give a gauge as to how tall he is, generally speaking, in the pics, would equate the two. Neither could b!tch at the other, is my point.

And you assumed because they are taller than me that it was two notably tall MEN, but really it's a couple, a man and a woman, and I don't think my friend is notably tall, though his GF is on the tall side of average.

No, not necessarily Tall men, but any men who are notably taller than you being in the middle would Not be necessary to gauge -- it'd be over-doing it and killing the mood. If the two guys are obviously basketball height given a revealing backdrop -- it'd soften the blow, but still wouldn't be good to do even for an average height guy. One of them's a woman? Ouch! Even worse! ("She's a MAN, baby!" -- Austin Powers). You DEFINITELY don't want, nor need in ANY circumstances if lying about your height, to be situated next to a taller woman.

I have friends that are 6.4 and 6.6, now they seem tall to me.

Did you just now realize they're about a foot taller than ya? :) "Wait, I always knew there was something UP with you, John... you're Tall!"

BTW, I would never suggest exaggerating / lie by 3 inches, IMO that is way to obvious, you might get away with an inch without it affecting your first meet.

I'm not a fan of it either, but as long as it's with "what everyone's doing" -- it's going to have less of a blow. And a guy could get lifts -- and definitely NOT wear thin flat sandals -- to give him some validated "leg room". Because not only can you play the role that guys exaggerate their height like women do with body (leg room) -- but also much of that is because many women wear heels, which is why a guy barely taller than said non-Real-tall girl isn't going to wet her pallet, generally speaking. A guy at 5'6" could find shoes that'd make him around 5'8" in them (many normal shoes would get him around 5'7" anyway; most guys IRL would say and be thought of 5'7" when 5'6" anyway). But again, there's understandable leg-room and adjustment VS flat-out killing it - lol. I tried advising Hawking on this, but oh well...

Unless you have a lot of practice lying under pressure, or you are a natural born liar, it's not very comfortable for most people and I think it affects how you behave.

That's why if it's in the leg-room level, and understanding reasonable circumstances, it shouldn't make a guy nervous feeling like a liar. Of course, one doesn't want to go down that slippery slope letting one comfort-zone leading to another, where, years later he actually believes he's 29 and 5'11". :)
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 336
LADIES - A Question of Height...
Posted: 2/18/2016 12:30:54 PM

I have never seen any sort of proof women are less picky about height in real life.


Me either.
Last Sunday was Valentine's Day.
At church, the priest asked all of the married couples present to stand up, and he had them do an informal repeat of their marriage vows.
I thought to myself that this was a good opportunity to find further proof of the height thing, and sure enough, as I looked around, 90% of the couples featured a man taller than the woman. All ages, all races. Simple fact.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >