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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > stop with the endless messages and ask me out already      Home login  
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 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 101
stop with the endless messages and ask me out alreadyPage 5 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
"If people feel it's a huge sacrifice in time and effort to meet someone from on-line for half an hour, or hour for a drink or coffee, and want some guarantee that it will turn out to be a match made in heaven with a perfect person-otherwise they feel they have been ripped off-then get off the computer and meet your dream guy/gal in the real world. That would eliminate all of the pre-screening, testing, and interrogation that people feel is necessary before meeting someone."





Wow, did someone forget to replace their Count Chocula this morning ?


Look, here's what it comes down to FOR ME :

The majority of the women who initiate contact with me are women I don't find attractive and 99% of the ones who actually respond to my contact are women that I find marginally attractive.


Why do I send msgs to women I only find marginally attractive ? The ones I find more attractive don't respond so I lower the bar hoping their personality will make them more attractive. But I digress...

IOW if the woman I was speaking with on the phone was someone I found very attractive then yes I would no doubt still meet her even if the convo felt awkward.

So yeah, I can't be bothered to go meet someone I barely find attractive if the convo on the phone doesn't do it for me.

And if someone wants me to get over myself - it has nothing to do with getting over myself. It has to do with personal taste and I can't change that any more than I can change the kinds of food I like to eat or music I prefer to listen to.


Would I rather meet someone in the real world ?

Of course !

In the meantime, here I am playing the equivalent of a lottery hoping I might get lucky.
 jessebunnies
Joined: 2/18/2013
Msg: 102
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History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 1:04:10 PM
There's an easy way to stop this though most women find it uncomfortable. It's called being direct! "are we going to meet up this weekend or just exchange messages forever" bam done! You'll have an answer. If he disappears well you know he was playing the online fantasy game. If he makes a date then your dating. Games stop when you put people on the spot.

Many people here are just living an online fantasy! You can choose to be a character in their play or you can write your own reality tv show by being direct.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 103
view profile
History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 2:18:06 PM
"The majority of the women who initiate contact with me are women I don't find attractive and 99% of the ones who actually respond to my contact are women that I find marginally attractive.

Why do I send msgs to women I only find marginally attractive ? The ones I find more attractive don't respond so I lower the bar hoping their personality will make them more attractive. But I digress..."

Yeah, we don't get along or like each other at all, but you just perfectly described my POF experience.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 104
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 2:37:57 PM
"you just perfectly described my POF experience."



We must be internet dating freaks , eh ?
Anomalies perhaps ?

I'm sure I describe many members - females even .

Not that you care ,but I don't dislike you, I just think you're long winded, over analytical and REPETETIVE.

BUT , I like that you're not an arrogant , know it all - I can't fucking STAND those guys . I can't even look at their pix , haha

In all fairness, I'm over analytical myself but I HATE typing so in my case the forum is spared .

Believe it or not, again not that you care, I am rooting for ya
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 105
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History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 2:57:27 PM
HawkingJr
we don't get along or like each other at all

Where did this come from?
 Onyx49
Joined: 3/6/2016
Msg: 106
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 3:02:08 PM
MSG-112 and 113

Wow...that's the saddest swill I've ever heard...just because you look like Shrek...doesn't mean you can't get a Cameron Diaz....
Are you working your charms and sweet talk.....
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 107
view profile
History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 4:54:12 PM
oh please get real here. Cameron Diaz and Shrek?? I don't think so. Charm means nothing without the physical attraction and/or lots of money lol!.
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 12/24/2015
Msg: 108
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 5:01:43 PM
I've had Shrek. He was amAZing.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 109
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 5:12:55 PM
k, I just spit out my martini.
I don't get why people are so passive. Frankly I think screw first.. since prolly someone going to be disappointed think of the money one can save dating?
I just got a message that there is no amount of eye bleach to erase. None. That sound you hear are my thighs shutting so hard they will chaff
ICK
Ick again
 NJgirl116
Joined: 7/3/2015
Msg: 110
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 5:26:15 PM
What's the message??
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 111
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 6:42:40 PM
So horrid I deleted it
He is going to bring me to Heaven with his tongue, then pleasure me more
I was like what
you buying me shoes?
serious creepy what he said
btw, he is a Man in his 50s.
Shudder
Lust is done til 2047
 DaYum_B1tch_My_Feet_Hurt
Joined: 3/9/2016
Msg: 112
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 6:58:01 PM

There's an easy way to stop this though most women find it uncomfortable. It's called being direct! "are we going to meet up this weekend or just exchange messages forever" bam done! You'll have an answer. If he disappears well you know he was playing the online fantasy game. If he makes a date then your dating. Games stop when you put people on the spot.

Many people here are just living an online fantasy! You can choose to be a character in their play or you can write your own reality tv show by being direct


Yes, POF has become Fantasy Island...
 Onyx49
Joined: 3/6/2016
Msg: 113
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/12/2016 8:59:11 PM
I don't get it...if I were a woman and I wanted a man...I'd just put on something short and some heels, and go stand on a corner...you'll have a date in no time.
 CuteandThick34
Joined: 1/5/2015
Msg: 114
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History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/13/2016 12:59:23 PM
May even get a nice ride to the police station. LMAO! ^^^
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 115
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/13/2016 1:20:09 PM

Yes, POF has become Fantasy Island...


Da plane!
Da plane!

Smiles, everyone.
 blueeyez01
Joined: 5/3/2014
Msg: 116
view profile
History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/13/2016 9:40:51 PM
Ummmmm...... clooneystutor ,it's spelled with an "a" = Thorazine

Question....is that a poem or part of a song?
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 117
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/13/2016 10:00:55 PM
"They're Coming to Take Me Away, Ha-Haaa!" is a 1966 novelty record by Jerry Samuels, recorded under the name Napoleon XIV.
 drinkthesunwithmyface
Joined: 3/27/2012
Msg: 118
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History
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/14/2016 12:19:08 AM
Haven't read all the posts. But I'd say that it depends on what is meant by "endless messaging" for each person. In my experience, it seems that with some women you can't get more than two message exchanges with no meaning or effort reflected. I message because I want to talk, and get to know that mysterious person online who may not even exist as presented in the first place. Sometimes I'll even get a whole dozen message exchanges out of someone, but there still isn't any quality with that quantity.

You people with nothing helpful in your profile, and no ability or willingness to make any real conversation...how the hell do you expect to get asked out on a date? This is even important enough to me that if a woman asks me out, but without any real profile and without any real conversation...don't give a damn if she asked me versus me ask her...I have no interest to go out on a date with her. And yes, in my case, that's even if she has sexy pictures. I know that's hard to believe.

Some people say that some kind of so-called 'first meet' will save trouble before putting in the time to chat, and will tell you whether or not you want to go further. But it seems to me that talking some online is even more effective and less trouble. They'll say that it doesn't matter if you feel no interest when seeing them in person, so a first-meet is best. But this is to forget (at least for some of us) the other side of getting to know someone which is just as important - all of those things that you can't know about someone from just a first-peek or first-date. While one person might say "why go to all the trouble if I know from first meeting that I'm not interested", I say "why go to the trouble of meeting when I can tell from conversation/profile that I'm not interested". Constantly go out on first-peeks to see if there's any reason to go further, or find out with conversation online if there's any reason to go further? Which is easier, and more effective...really?

So...I'm not really only looking for the least-trouble route, but I'm looking for the woman who understands that the one part is just as important as a first step - to see if there's any point in going further - as the other part is. The fact alone that she doesn't know this or think this way is part of what I'm looking for. And this obviously includes finding out if the woman is capable of conversation (two birds with one stone)...particular kinds of conversation concerning first contact online in a dating site.

We all know that people with attractive pics and very little in their profile get asked out nonetheless. But obviously there's a different dynamic going on there. And I personally have no interest in those kinds of dynamics, nor those kinds of women, if they can't make some freaking conversation.
 oneday57
Joined: 10/17/2015
Msg: 119
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/19/2016 3:19:09 PM
Well maybe the individual was slighted in some way before....its the dumb pushy ones as yourself that blow relationships and never have anyone concrete and then move on with a bigger attitude.....GET IT!?!?!
 ndm147
Joined: 8/1/2013
Msg: 120
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/25/2016 1:35:32 AM
onynx , stop calling us older women grandmas, cause I don't have grandchildren. I won't make you Pea Soup but will make you some pizzelles, which are an Italian cookie made in a pizzelle maker.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 121
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/25/2016 3:20:22 AM
Maybe nobody can afford you and they are just emailing unti they have enough saved up?
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 122
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/26/2016 10:14:21 AM
If they don't ask to meet within a few days, talk to somebody else. Don't let people waste your time.
 looking4luvxxx
Joined: 5/7/2015
Msg: 123
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/26/2016 12:28:43 PM
Girl I hear ya. Several years ago I was on Eharmony and paid to see if the prospects got any better. Went through each and every step of the "process" with this one guy and at the very end, we were supposed to phone call each other. It was like the line went dead. He did absolutely NOTHING to contact me. I was floored to say the least. I found that paying for dating service yielded no better results. I have more faith in fate. I think some of these men are in a relationship and they can't take it any further so they continue to email. Good luck with your search. There are a lot more toads than frogs.
 looking4luvxxx
Joined: 5/7/2015
Msg: 124
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 3/26/2016 12:30:27 PM
I have found onyx to be less than helpful and I thing he trolls the forums just to have something to say. He is unnecessarily mean with his advice.
 SilverWings2017
Joined: 12/14/2016
Msg: 125
stop with the endless messages and ask me out already
Posted: 1/14/2017 3:46:59 PM
I don't think her profile review was necessary, either. She seems like a nice girl to me.

The 'endless messages' thing happens a lot. It has nothing to do with her character or her children.

Honestly. If this man was sincere, he would have asked her out already.

There are lonely hearts, married (or otherwise) committed men just looking for attention from a pretty girl like homemakerwoman. Some may just be 'catfishing', too.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > stop with the endless messages and ask me out already