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 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 101
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pofPage 5 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
"don't tell us you have a cat hidden in your camper"

>>>no, it just has the classic bumpersticker, "if this van is rockin, don't bother knocking"

as for taking guns on dates, re-read posts 12 and 13 on the first page. when warning flags are flying before the meet, guns are not needed. Good sense is far cheaper than a gun and a defense lawyer at $300 per hour. that's not a pick on the OP, that's a reminder for all of us. Don't let your lonliness/horniness get in the way of your goodseness
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 102
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/13/2016 8:29:22 AM
"as for taking guns on dates..."

So if I see a shootout or an execution at a coffee shop or restaurant, would it be safe to assume someone wasn't pleased with who showed up for a first meet from a dating site?
 Whisky_River
Joined: 12/2/2015
Msg: 103
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/13/2016 8:45:23 AM

Thing is, even if I was smart enough not to go meet him at his house at 11pm, there'll be someone else who will fall for that. I'm not of the "make sure he rapes the other girl, as long as it's not me" mindset. Focusing too much on the victim's poor judgment does nothing. It doesn't solve the core issue.

^^^^^^^Bada Bing!!!
Some people like to keep blaming others for their stupidity. Truth is, these people don't have it written on their foreheads.....they know how to suck people in to make them feel safe.
Word....Better safe than sorry!
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 104
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/13/2016 12:11:24 PM
if an animal doesn't care who it bites...how do we talk the animal into not doing what comes naturally to it? how do we shame it into not biting? or do we instead teach people to avoid the biting animal? I don't find its victim blaming to say, "congratulations, you can avoid some of the bad situations that are out there, by avoiding the bad situations that are out there." of course, there are conniving con men out there, but dumb animals are dumb animals...they don't hide the fact they are going to bite you.

I don't have faith that all bad people can stop doing what feels really good to them.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 105
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/13/2016 12:20:05 PM


LOL Do not tell us you have a cat hidden in your camper!


More like skeletons.

Some of the women want to know the cause of deaths instead of asking me first.

I never got the chance to plead self-defense :(

On topic, there was a thread awhile back by a gal that basically described Prince Charming, and a few sentences later, decried security and caution concerns when Prince Charming had the audacity to invite her over for dinner on the 3rd or 4th date.

I found it amusing how Prince Charming was elevated to DEFCON 1 over an invite to his cave.

 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 106
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/13/2016 12:28:40 PM

but dumb animals are dumb animals...they don't hide the fact they are going to bite you.


Right, and neither did the guy in the OP's story.

From her Message 12:


all the warning signs were there, he constantly called me names, the worst you can imagine because I was either on pof,



anyways, the warning signs were there but I was lonely, not feeling to confident about myself or dating so after his tons and tons of apologies I decided to meet him


If a rattlesnake coils up and hisses, what should you do?
Keep getting closer?
It has warned you, and it's up to you to heed the warning or ignore it.
Ignore it at your own peril.
 boatbob2q
Joined: 3/7/2012
Msg: 107
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 5/19/2016 5:10:19 PM
Why did you pay for this morons Greyhound ticket??? are you that hard up for a date???Did this guy,stay at your house for 3 days? so,put his name here on POF,I doubt if they will put you off POF.
 LuvFishes
Joined: 7/1/2011
Msg: 108
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 6/5/2016 8:25:17 PM
Ms. Reesecup while it might be too late to file charges. You should report him to POF. Let the owners of site monitor him or shut down his profile since he beat you up, used a knife... I don't think they want guys like that here. There are a couple here I know are predators, they are aggressive.

You learned some hard lessons about online dating. Or for that matter, dating period. One never be so desperate for attention, companionship that you let safety, logic go out the window. One of the basic rules of dating. YOU GOT TO BE COMFORTABLE BEING ALONE, BEFORE YOU SHOULD DATE. Dating should be enjoyable, fun, and not a rush. If your looking for sex, then both parties should be on the same page.

As a women, you should have a buddy system. Someone who is checking on you, have a SAFE word. Once used your buddy knows to contact the police immediately. Bringing a stranger into your home for a women or even letting a date pick you up should never be at your home.

Remember flirting while fun, provocative clothing, pics can and often will lead the opposite sex to Fantasy's that you may not have meant for them to interpret wrong but they did. Your a beautiful, young women. Be safe, next time (I really hope there isn't) PRESS charges THAT IS HOW YOU HELP OTHER WOMEN AND YOURSELF. Tell the Date Site of your experience. Hoping you find a great catch to date, enter a relationship and/or marry. Just be careful, God definitely blessed you.
 boatbob2q
Joined: 3/7/2012
Msg: 109
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/13/2016 9:08:24 AM
im thinking youre a few clicks low,on the sense scale,WHY,would you,OR any one else go out,and/or meet someone that called you names?
 2ufo2
Joined: 8/29/2016
Msg: 110
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/13/2016 10:14:43 AM
^^^^^
Desperation and low self-esteem.
 Joyandlaughter2
Joined: 9/9/2016
Msg: 111
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/13/2016 4:06:48 PM
Good question because I just left a abusive man and he comes on here and match.com in Kamloops,hes a narcisitc socialpath who has threatened my life and anyone I ever meet.We women need to know
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 112
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/14/2016 12:11:29 AM

I don't have faith that all bad people can stop doing what feels really good to them.

I don't assume that people who do bad things feel "good" about those bad things. They could very well feel terrible, self-hatred and depression over those acts. It doesn't excuse the behavior. These people are obviously messed up - and may not have the knowledge or the ability to "act right".

People assume that only the victim is hurt when violence is done - however the purpetrator can also be emotionally savaged by his own actions. (not an excuse or absolution). The goal is still the same - stop the violence.
 imanorangetiger
Joined: 12/29/2011
Msg: 113
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/14/2016 3:27:36 AM
Human behaviour is a complex subject but ultimately, an individual's behaviour is always a reaction to an immediate situation. Taking acute mental illness out of the equation, they have a choice to behave a certain way, or not to behave a certain way. There is always a pay-off. It doesn't necessarily have to be beneficial to the individual.
 hitsme
Joined: 6/19/2015
Msg: 114
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/29/2016 12:00:36 PM
Good heavens why on earth did you not listen to yourself ,if I get a felling that I don't want to talk to someone I don't ,,I can understand the police not doing anything !!!!!!
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 115
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 10/15/2016 7:28:27 PM
OP......did anything come of this situation?
Red flags are never to be brushed aside same as the hair on the back of our necks.....they are the human emergency broadcasting system.
 SilverWings2017
Joined: 12/14/2016
Msg: 116
Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 1/14/2017 12:28:15 PM
This is all BS. I remember she made a similar post like this one years ago on POF forums.
 lisadawn1
Joined: 3/15/2016
Msg: 117
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/22/2017 1:02:09 PM
I believe you. I just met I guy recently seemed real nice FaceTimed everything but when I met him he got real aggressive almost abusive sexually. Ok I can be judged too but why is it the guy is never to blame ? And the website has no place for us to warn other women ? So who is protected here the attacker??!!! How can I report him Marcus???!!!
 Canandaigua_Momma
Joined: 12/16/2015
Msg: 118
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/22/2017 1:18:03 PM
Lisadawn1, if your safety was threatened on a date, you should have called 9-1-1.
If you don't like the way he is speaking to you, hang-up and block his telephone.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 119
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/22/2017 9:58:12 PM
A pof guy where I live killed a young mother of 3 young girls. He hacked her up and tossed her parts in different areas outdoors. They did catch him. Woman's instinct.......use it! Don't seclude yourself with a stranger.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 120
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/23/2017 7:54:43 AM
^^^ She dated the guy for a solid month. Her intuition obviously didn't work.
Warning women about dangerous vegetation
Posted: 9/23/2017 3:00:21 PM
I didn't know that one could grow one's underarm hair to such a length.



"DON'T PASS CARS



ON CURVE OR HILL



IF THE COPS DON'T GET YOU



MORTICIANS WILL



BURMA-SHAVE."
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 122
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/23/2017 6:23:59 PM
Cool dog, he was a recent transplant to WA. I would look very closely at someone like that, closer than I would look at someone else. I would definitely want to know where he worked, did he transfer with his job, do some background searching. Definitely check for a criminal history. It's so sad that an innocent mistake of trusting him cost her her life. Now three little girls are motherless. Then what he did with her was horrific.
 __TEXASCHICK__
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 123
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/25/2017 5:01:03 AM
[[There is Something strange about this story.!
Were you in his house?
Were you two drunks?
Did you call the police immediately or few days after...?]]

thinking there is a whole lot of story left out.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 124
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/25/2017 6:14:14 AM

Cool dog, he was a recent transplant to WA. I would look very closely at someone like that, closer than I would look at someone else. I would definitely want to know where he worked, did he transfer with his job, do some background searching. Definitely check for a criminal history. It's so sad that an innocent mistake of trusting him cost her her life. Now three little girls are motherless. Then what he did with her was horrific.


When you transplanted to WA from NY did any of the guys who wanted to date you put you under that same scrutiny?
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 125
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Warning women about a dangerous guy on pof
Posted: 9/25/2017 3:16:06 PM

I believe you. I just met I guy recently seemed real nice FaceTimed everything but when I met him he got real aggressive almost abusive sexually

Yeah, but does your main pic have you dolled up in makeup with your hands behind your head, with an inviting pose -- while also having one of your pics be a graphic saying of "I don't know if I attract crazy, or if I make them that way" -- with a comment that says "I think I make them that way lol"? The OP does. :)

Ok I can be judged too but why is it the guy is never to blame ?

The guy is to blame far more often than not. It errs on the side of blaming him, which many times is accurate in general, even if thru many emotionally distressing situations, things may get exaggerated. I think why you think guys are never blamed for being physically rough (or "almost abusive" as you put it) with girls is that you're just tuning into Some of the people who would bet the gal is at Least somewhat right, but heed final judgment on he-said-she-said stuff... or the small (but loud) fraction that go "no way". But all in all, people in general blame the guy -- even if it's not a final judgement on him, there's still going to be a cloud of negativity surrounding him with them.

And the website has no place for us to warn other women ?

They should if the gal (or guy) has a police report on the other person filed, with charges pressed. Otherwise, it's he-said-she-said stuff, which is always going to get at least a small % of bogus claims (dealing with Any subject).

So who is protected here the attacker??!!!

No, there's absolutely Zero implication of protection by POF of any guy (or gal) -- whether they be Mr Nice Guy or Mr Mean Guy.

How can I report him Marcus???!!!

Going in the little-used forum isn't going to do Squat. Virtually 0% of users really know about the forum, let alone read it. It's a way to vent -- but that solves nothing. You write the site itself about them, and I'm assuming if they get more than 1 (again, it's just a he-said-she-said thing from their POV), they'll do something about his account. Or at least they should! :)
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