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Joined: 3/4/2016
Msg: 21
Guys who assume...Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
^^^ When are you Grandpa's going to step up your game - get some work done on your body and face, maybe lift a weight, eat a salad, tighten up the scrotum, get the little blue pill, hair plugs..geez, maybe even just a facial. You don't seem like you're the "wallet" type that can bag what Trump bags or Kanye so, step up your game. And BTW, to many you are an old man.
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 22
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Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 10:05:39 AM
Yea I was going to say how it's funny that a 48 year old man old enough to be someone's grandma is calling another woman grandma. At this point you're all just peers.
Joined: 3/6/2016
Msg: 23
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 10:39:52 AM
damn ain't gotta be biting like that....chill......
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 24
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 12:19:50 PM
I dunno why I said I was turned 56. I guess cuz I'll be know we grandmas have alzheimers....some days I don't know what day it is....

So thanks for the responses....and by the way....guys my age look more like great-grandpas than grandpas. I am in great shape and just recently have been hit up by a 36 year old. So yes, communication is key....I just didn't want to hurt his feelings, but tact is huge.'re answers are wonderful. Keep em coming you old fart.
Joined: 2/17/2016
Msg: 25
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 12:26:16 PM

So, given that he says one thing and does another

Huh? Where did that happen? He was being affectionate and testing the waters on a 2nd date. Doesn't make him a hypocrite or a liar, nor does it indicate that he intended to have sex that night. No reason for this rush to judgment.
Joined: 12/14/2014
Msg: 26
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 2:59:01 PM

Good 4u grandma! U got it going on! No completed academic education, lying about ur age... sure u got it going on...
Joined: 1/1/2012
Msg: 27
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/22/2016 3:15:15 PM

Men are doomed if we do and doomed it we don't because most women let the man make the running in this respect. How often does the woman lean in to kiss the man first. How often does the woman hold the mans hand first? Not very often.
That said, you have every right not to feel comfortable with this. So why not act like a grown up and just tell him using words. Poor guy is not a bloody clairvoyant.

A lot more than you think.
I feel I give a vibe that I am sexually interested but am very laid back. More than happy to let the woman make the first move and usually they do or make it very plain it is time for the move.
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 28
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/23/2016 3:48:28 AM
Many women don't communicate at all whether they want the man to do anything physical. The typical complaint here is he didn't try to kiss on the lips on the *first* date. The nice guy described in this thread apparently didn't try this on the second date. The poor chap gets bashed for being too bold.

You agreed to go on dates, so he is justified in thinking you might be interested in doing things more than friends.

Regarding women's lack of communication, not encouraging him to try anything and not discouraging him if he does try, it's like she's a mannequin or a corpse. Expects him to be psychic?

Often she ends up wanting or not wanting whatever he tries. She might initially want him to kiss her, then when he doesn't, she gets sour grapes and claims she was never attracted. On the other hand, if she initially thought she wouldn't do anything on the date, then he kisses her, she likes it.

Earlier posts are correct the OP is bragging. Why else mention he's younger? If he were a year older and behaved the same way, what's the difference? Because she mentioned age, I'll say if the dude knew what he's doing, he would go out with a younger gal. He would message someone who has a photo.

When I try something for the first time, I move slowly enough for her to prevent it from occurring: she can back away from me, put out a hand to block me, say "I'm not ready", shake her head no, and various other gestures.
Joined: 3/8/2012
Msg: 29
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/23/2016 6:19:35 AM
Maggie, I don't assume anything and I have never been a touchy feely type guy (while making out I certainly was).

When I was close to 40 I dated 4 smart attractive women (about my age). I assume what happened by the end of the 2nd date (sex) with 3 of them was normal for couples our age.

There wasn't a 2nd date with the one I didn't touch (except for dancing). We met at a single's dance. At the end of our first date (dinner and a live play) I ended up at her house until 2 AM. I never made a move. No doubt in my teens it would have been a touchy feely approach as soon as we entered her living room. Some of us change as we age.

After a long relationship I returned to the dating scene at 60. I've noticed women changed too. At the end of one 3rd date, I walked my date to her door (I wasn't invited in) and gave her a small hug and kiss on the lips. Afterwards she commented that we were moving way too fast and she was worth the wait. We dated for 3 months after that and I never got beyond a kiss and a hug.

People do change and some might get a little too sensitive when someone interested in them physically expresses a little fondness.
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 30
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/24/2016 2:07:44 PM

WHY do guys just assume that you want to hold their hand, have him rub your back, play with your hair, kiss your hand, etc.

It's call a freaking date for a reason. He is not going out with you to see if he can play bingo with him or share your copy of Rider's Digest, he is going out with you because he found you physically attractive and the next step is to start touching and seeing if you can become intimate with one another.

If that was not your intent, then I believe you are the one misleading. You should have told him that you just wanted to be friends and leave it at that. The age difference should not be an issue. My fiance is 14 years younger than me, and many women date, marry, have wild sex with men that are much younger.

So, the only problem I see in your story is YOU. Do not mislead. Tell him you do not find him attractive, or that you may want to move a lot slower. To which he has every right to say goodbye, or if is the case play the game.
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 31
Guys who assume...
Posted: 3/26/2016 10:56:52 AM
It's a common problem. Women are often like slow-cookers, and many men move too fast. Let's just say he was not the catch of the day.

I guess you'll just have to keep fishing. Don't worry about it, you only need one good fish.
Joined: 3/25/2016
Msg: 32
Guys who assume...
Posted: 4/5/2016 7:38:38 PM
I just taser the overly touchy ones.
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 33
Guys who assume...
Posted: 4/6/2016 8:07:17 AM
According to my boyfriend, there is a relationship between these variables: holding hands, kissing, and sex. Apparently, holding hands leads to kissing and kissing leads to sex. So the guy in question was testing if sex was a possibility, by starting with your hands.

Now that I think about it, any date that I consented to hold my hand (1), was someone I was considering having sex with. There were another 2 dates who wanted to hold my hand and I felt uncomfortable the whole time because I was not interested in any physical contact with them. I withdrew my hands, that didn't stop them from trying to pry a kiss from me, so this hold hand holding to kissing scheme seems to be well known among men, lol.

About you being uncomfortable with that, there is nothing like opening your mouth and communicating that you think it's too soon for him to be putting his hands on you like that. Or you can do like I used to do, just don't see him again, he doesn't have to know why. The way I see it is that other people would be fine with the groping so let them meet someone who is okay with that, instead of making them feel like they are doing something wrong. I'm not going to endure in silence but the truth of the matter is that you're not obligated to see anyone again.
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