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 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 51
Are women more attractive to men that are takenPage 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
No , women do not become more attractive to me just because I am taken at the time.

I either find them attractive or I don't regardless of my status.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 52
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/6/2016 7:41:32 PM
Nyckosi- Both sexes have people who have no respect for themselves or others and purposely try to pick up married people. I better leave it at that, I could go on a rant about that topic.
However, there are married people that don't wear rings. I've flirted with men by mistake when I didn't know until they mentioned a wife/girlfriend.
I know a LOT of single women that have had the same thing happen and I have a theory about what attracts us that I believe is accurate.
Decent married men who stop looking when they are in a relationship stop looking at other women sexually.
This means they relax and talk to us JUST to be friendly and talk. They aren't trying to bed us, which, ironically, attracts us like fly's.
Single men complaining about women ignoring them might want to consider the implications of that and try it themselves for a change.
 Ailand
Joined: 3/5/2016
Msg: 53
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/6/2016 9:21:24 PM
for me no... but I don't mind being friends with them because guys who are happily taken don't make constant flirtatious remarks, or double entendre and we can often have long fun, interesting conversations. Most often they have been co-workers I take my breaks with, or chat all day with while we work. I can't stand the constant " Your looking pretty today, I love your smile, you smell so nice and I like your hair, did you do something new to it?" blah blah blah... and on and on. Of course sometimes a "Difficult /Strain" hurdles happen in his/their life. Sometimes it will make that fine line blurred, but for me a good friend whom I know to be very happy with that significant person, I always encourage him to work it out and then remove myself from sight. To me he's a friend and often enough a good enough friend that I know I'm not in love with, I just know he finds it easier to talk to me. If I was in love with him, he wouldn't be married. I'd never allow myself to get involved with someone. That's just me.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 54
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/6/2016 9:55:03 PM
carolann

You would think that a married man would not be up for hitting on other women, but in my experience it is not true so being relaxed and just friends does not always work. I have been friendly and easy with guys that were married, thinking that they would not take it amiss. However some have still tried to get a bit on the side, not a relationship per se. of course.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 55
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 7:03:46 AM
the problem is, people don't THINK an uncoupled person is a damaged one....they've EXPERIENECED it to be generally true. While we are single and we know a few people here in the forums we'd want to meet if they lived closer...we know more people who've posted their thoughts and beliefs here and we're responded with some version of, "wow, no wonder you are single".

are there damaged people who are coupled? sure are. but, they are the "right type of damage" for their equally damaged partners. Their red flags match up.

sometimes, we're sick of the routine of our lives, we want to feel a spark, and hey, there's a person over there. Maybe they miss the spark in their relationship, too, they've turned into roomates, and so here we are, two people wanting to feel alive. then after a period of time, that feels good, so we invest more into it, and when they go, "hey, whoa, I didn't think this would go this far, I have to tell you--i'm taken" and just like the surgeon's general on the pack of cigarettes we're addicted to...we go, "so what?"
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 56
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 7:15:32 AM
So much whining! If someone is interested in you, they will respond to you, if they are not interested they don't care if you've been married, have kids, etc., they are interested so they will meet you. Stop making excuses with BS like women want you because you are taken LOL it's ridiculous. The only men or women who want you because you are with someone else are those who like to cheat with cheaters.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 57
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 8:40:00 AM
I think it boils down to ego boost, and a need for a constant ego boost. For men who are taken or flirting with someone who is taken, some men want validation that they still have what it takes to attract women, even if they or the other person aren't in the market. And it's the same type of thing for women who are taken. They want to know if men still find them attractive, and they think getting compliments from men who are taken is playing it safe, since it doesn't go beyond the flirting-although occasionally it does.

The second part of the equation is once people are coupled up, the daily and constant compliments about how beautiful and wonderful and totally perfect their partner is starts to decrease as daily routine and life takes over, and people tend to miss those constant compliments. so they seek it or welcome it elsewhere. And men are hard wired to be constantly hunting and luring, even if they don't act on capturing new prey.
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 58
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 4:32:55 PM

Nyckosi- Both sexes have people who have no respect for themselves or others and purposely try to pick up married people. I better leave it at that, I could go on a rant about that topic.
However, there are married people that don't wear rings. I've flirted with men by mistake when I didn't know until they mentioned a wife/girlfriend.
I know a LOT of single women that have had the same thing happen and I have a theory about what attracts us that I believe is accurate.
Decent married men who stop looking when they are in a relationship stop looking at other women sexually.
This means they relax and talk to us JUST to be friendly and talk. They aren't trying to bed us, which, ironically, attracts us like fly's.
Single men complaining about women ignoring them might want to consider the implications of that and try it themselves for a change.


Personally speaking I treat women no different than I do if I'm in a relationship or single, I'm not trying to get laid but it doesn't seem to matter. I do know when I'm out with a female friend (Just a friend) more girls do approach me and are flirtatious and I guarantee if I was alone they wouldn't approach me at all because I've experienced seen that with my own two eyes to the point that I'm better off with a wing girl than a wing guy.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 59
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 7:43:14 PM
I see a fair number of assumptions sailing back and forth here. I find it a da*med shame that people don't park them long enough to perhaps find someone they may like.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 60
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/7/2016 9:01:37 PM
Come on. You can't be serious.

Why would anyone find someone more attractive because they are taken? Imo, that makes no sense. We all know multiple couples who only stay together for negative reasons like being co dependant, or money is more important than being happy with their partners. Who else would want them except their partners?

Mental health issues are the only reason I can imagine why someone would be attracted to someone who was off limits.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 61
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 5:25:57 AM

Mental health issues are the only reason I can imagine why someone would be attracted to someone who was off limits.


They are not off limits.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 62
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 6:51:39 AM
I'm sailing away, set an open course for the virgin sea
I've got to be free, free to face the life that's ahead of me
On board, I'm the captain, so climb aboard
We'll search for tomorrow on every shore
And I'll try, oh Lord, I'll try to carry on
I look to the sea, reflections in the waves spark my memory
Some happy, some sad
I think of childhood friends and the dreams we had
We live happily forever, so the story goes
But somehow we missed out on that pot of gold
But we'll try best that we can to carry on
A gathering of angels appeared above my head
They sang to me this song of hope, and this is what they said
They said come sail away, come sail away
Come sail away with me
Come sail away, come sail away
Come sail away with me
I thought…

Assumptions?????? Nooooooo, surely not!!!!!
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 63
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 11:48:04 AM
I think this is a pretty common sense topic. Having a girlfriend doesn't mean other women will want to steal you away from her. Being desired by women sends a message to others that you have healthy emotions, you're not needy, and other desirable traits. It's the same thing as seeing ten people walk out of a store with a name brand product. If those people enjoy the product, I probably will too.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 64
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 4:20:58 PM
"They are not off limits."

If that is your mindset, then you must think it is okay to steal from every store you go in, and take food out of the mouths of children. Walking down the street, you see a car you like and figure you have the right to just take it.

How do you react when someone tries to take something of yours? Do you tell yourself it wasn't of limits.
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 65
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 4:39:18 PM
But people don't legally own other people, do they? In our society I hope not, though it does happen it is illegal.
If two people are in a relationship either one has the freedom to choose to end it and start another. Not exactly the same as store property ir a car on the street.
 ebolakitty
Joined: 3/19/2016
Msg: 66
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 4:50:08 PM

If that is your mindset, then you must think it is okay to steal from every store you go in, and take food out of the mouths of children. Walking down the street, you see a car you like and figure you have the right to just take it.


How does that follow? Are you saying that someone can or should have enforcible property rights over another person? They have a word for that concept. As I have always understood it, a person gets to decide for themselves whether they are or are not off limits.

OT moriama ... I have heard that you are active in humanitarian projects. My applause and admiration.
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 67
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 6:05:24 PM
Marriage is a legal (imo binding) contract between two people. For moral, but more importantly logical reasons, people end one relationship before then enter another.

Imo, only co dependent people have to have another person waiting in the wings before they have the guts to leave the relationship they are in.
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 68
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 6:07:50 PM
The OP was not referring to a marriage. .he said he had been dating a woman for a month. .slightly different. .does dating for a month form a legally binding contract?
 moraima
Joined: 6/26/2005
Msg: 69
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Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 6:12:38 PM
"he said he had been dating a woman for a month."

You are correct. I had forgotten that.

No, I would consider any person who had been dating for month as being in any type of relationship, nor would I consider them taken.
 bamagrl68
Joined: 11/14/2010
Msg: 70
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/8/2016 7:35:00 PM
blackwood85- I don't doubt that you treat women with respect, that shows in your posts.
As far as having better luck when you are out with female friends, that makes sense.
Humans are far past our caveman/woman days, but we still have survival and/or mating instincts.
You being seen with other women who are friends with you makes them feel safe with you, it's a simple as that.
Maybe you should go out with your women friends more often.
Who knows, maybe you could start a trend.
To heck with the wing man, it becomes wing wo-man. ;)
 Dinno76
Joined: 2/11/2016
Msg: 71
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/14/2016 10:45:04 AM
Some single women are more attracted to married men or men that are in relationships than single men.
 elig0724
Joined: 4/11/2016
Msg: 72
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/14/2016 5:28:09 PM
Depends on the woman, I guess. Personally, I'm not attracted to men that are taken.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 73
Are women more attractive to men who are taken
Posted: 4/17/2016 6:15:59 PM
and now apparently she's been taken, too?
 BelleAtlantic
Joined: 11/7/2012
Msg: 74
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/25/2016 9:25:01 AM
Considering motive.....

Just the way one naturally gravitates someone who appears very friendly and people are always after their company, some women naturally gravitate toward men who seem very much loved and cared for, as it represents what they desire they were or had.

Some women have rationalized that being with someone who is taken is essentially cutting out the concern of being cheated on (by becoming the person someone is cheating with). Some sort of the hunter becomes the hunted.

Others may rationalize that they want the benefits without the responsibilities, and that's what's attractive about someone who is taken. They want to be treated well (a matter of perspective), and not have to owe him the responsibility of working on a relationship, the ultimate honeymoon phase.

Others have decided that any man would step out of their relationship/marriage, and they are there to test the theory.

Then again, they do say "why would a woman want what another does not?"
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 75
Are women more attractive to men that are taken
Posted: 4/25/2016 9:35:21 AM
once when debating men's general lack of clothing style, my boss joked he was never aware of how poorly he dressed until he got married so a woman could tell him. Belle likely has a point, when us guys can have a woman shave the parts we can't reach and buy us clothing, rather than ask the Hong Kong tailor, "what tie goes with that?", we likely present better and that subtleness might help us not lose a woman we can otherwise win. I wonder how many potential relationships died upon the uttering of the words, "what's wrong with this shirt?"

I've known a few women who preferred not to have to do the heavy lifting of a relationship. sometimes that meant hooking up with some guy and risking an STD. other times, an already-taken fellow might be considered lower risk (when in reality he's likely plugged his lamp into a few light sockets already). not every woman is looking for marriage right at the moment.
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