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Show ALL Forums  > Over 45  > Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?      Home login  
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 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 51
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?Page 3 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)

I always dress to kill, and then discover my date is wearing ripped jeans, a t-shirt and flip-flops... and actually feel kind of let down, even if she's great otherwise. The ones who really dress up on first meeting, I usually can't wait to see them again.


I don't get the ripped jeans fashion that so many women are into. Women will go to a fashion boutique and pay top dollar to get jeans that have rips and holes in them. I have a suspicion that if a guy was to show up on a date wearing jeans or any other clothing that has rips and holes in them, not many women would think "Wow. What a fashionable guy." I have jeans that have rips and holes in them, but I didn't buy them that way. The holey look was never intended and came after buying them. I guess I should keep them in case I go on a date, to show that I can be a jean fashionista as well.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 52
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/17/2016 8:01:26 AM
Typo. Wrong thread.
 ginghamgal
Joined: 2/13/2016
Msg: 53
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/17/2016 8:05:50 AM

People need to dress appropriate for the venue. If the date is at a low key, casual place ( like most of my first dates / meetings ), I wouldn't care if she is wearing jeans and a T-shirt. Provided that she is neat and clean.


Agreed. I'm not expecting a man to wear a dress shirt and slacks to a place when the general dress code is T-shirt and jeans ( or maybe shorts on a warm day ).
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 54
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/17/2016 9:52:59 AM
The ones that get me are those who say, "let's meet for sex." Why would any SANE man (or woman), want to have sex with someone he or she doesn't know? Oops....I forgot.....with men, the little head rules the big head.....until, as my daughter tells me (she's a pharmacy technician), men come in to the pharmacy, panicked because "they've picked up a 'little something' and want to know if the pharmacist can "help them out."
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 55
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/18/2016 12:22:59 PM


I don't get the ripped jeans fashion that so many women are into. Women will go to a fashion boutique and pay top dollar to get jeans that have rips and holes in them. I have a suspicion that if a guy was to show up on a date wearing jeans or any other clothing that has rips and holes in them, not many women would think "Wow. What a fashionable guy." I have jeans that have rips and holes in them, but I didn't buy them that way. The holey look was never intended and came after buying them. I guess I should keep them in case I go on a date, to show that I can be a jean fashionista as well.


I have seen women in jeans that were ripped and "holey" in a way that made them ... interesting. Yeah, that's the word, "Interesting!"

I don't have any jeans with rips or holes. Jeans are a really tough material, they do not rip or wear out easily. I do have some jeans that are a bit frayed at the edges. And I have several pair with stains, oil or grease or paint. But I don't think those are fashionable.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 56
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/18/2016 12:53:14 PM
“People need to dress appropriate for the venue. If the date is at a low key, casual place ( like most of my first dates / meetings ), I wouldn't care if she is wearing jeans and a T-shirt. Provided that she is neat and clean.” / “Agreed. I'm not expecting a man to wear a dress shirt and slacks to a place when the general dress code is T-shirt and jeans ( or maybe shorts on a warm day ).”

Perhaps one significant difference here is that I have almost always met women from OLD in upscale-ish restaurants. Now not everyone there was dressed like it was a night out on the town, but usually most were, and the women I met knew what kind of restaurants they were, so it just seemed odd to dress down to meet there. I have never met a woman at coffee shop (unless it was a business meeting) or bowling alley or most any place you’d expect to find very casually dressed people, with the exception of the one who insisted I meet her at a nature park (the one time I ever wore jeans to an OLD meeting – it was hot enough to wear shorts, which she did). Since I don’t drink, I’ve also never suggested meeting at a bar, which could go either way dress-wise.

Once I got in this big argument with a woman after I foolishly told her ahead of time what I’d be wearing when we met at a casual Chilis-type restaurant and she went nuts on me, because she’d planned on dressing down and didn’t want to be the worst dressed of us two. I ended up leaving the tie at home and proceeded to a crappy meeting with my ripped jeans, t-shirt and tennis shoes-wearing date.

“I don't get the ripped jeans fashion that so many women are into. Women will go to a fashion boutique and pay top dollar to get jeans that have rips and holes in them. I have a suspicion that if a guy was to show up on a date wearing jeans or any other clothing that has rips and holes in them, not many women would think ‘Wow. What a fashionable guy.’”

Most of the time when I go out bar-hopping/clubbing with my best friend, she wears ripped jeans (but a very nice blouse and sexy high heels to go with them). I really don’t understand this phenomenon – she is a super-fashion conscious-oriented person and she always has amazing work outfits and will leave most men drooling whenever she goes out to event or formal party with her short skirts and dresses and catsuits, but if it’s just a random night out, ripped jeans it is (as proof, I just added a picture collage of her and me, one with ripped jeans on a random night out bar hopping and another when we were at an event; I'm not worried about these pictures discouraging interest from women considering my 9 years of failure here, but also I'm just taking this week off from contacting women because my anniversary this Friday is making me psychologically problematic). She claims men find them sexy, but jeans on a woman (ripped or otherwise) have little appeal to me.

She also tries to get me to wear jeans, because she thinks women overall will find that sexier than my James Bond look I’m normally sporting, but I get way too many compliments (including from her!) for that to be true. I’m not a rugged guy and shouldn’t be rocking jeans, even if I did like them, and since I’m so small, it’s much easier for me to get slacks that fit properly than jeans. (KJ interestingly wanted me to wear jeans to our POF meeting last summer, despite the fact that we actually matched because she was as stylishly-dressed as I was.)
 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 57
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/19/2016 8:42:01 PM
I went out on a very spontaneous date this Sunday with the guy who I'm now dating - but I was the one being spontaneous and suggested that date. I was wearing shorts, tank top, messy, wind-blown hair, no makeup (except mascara and a little eye liner). We went for a 4 mile walk by the water, it was hot and we were both sweating. But this was an OUTDOOR, day time date. For a night out on the town, I want to take my time to get ready and not do the last minute crazy rush. When you have younger kids, you can't be spontaneous and drop everything you do to go rush meet some dude from the internet.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 58
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/19/2016 8:49:03 PM


it was hot and we were both sweating.


No more sweaty outdoor dates for this camper.

I had a nymph march my ass up a mountain.

I watched her cute butt get farther, and farther ahead of me until it became a dot.

I finally reached her and she said she wanted to march back and up another mountain.

I said sorry, I need a time out...
 Cat*Eyes
Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 59
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/19/2016 10:04:09 PM
I would like time, to get ready etc.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 60
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/20/2016 12:25:31 PM

TrvstinKarma
We went for a 4 mile walk by the water, it was hot and we were both sweating.


ClooneysTutor
No more sweaty outdoor dates for this camper.


I rather like sweaty outdoor dates. You get an idea of what they’re going to look like the morning after, which is sometimes very different from the night before.

On the other hand, I am most definitely not interested in a “Bataan Death March” as mentioned so many times by LiterateHiker.



We hiked 13 miles with a 5,000 feet rise in elevation in 21 minutes flat!
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 61
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/20/2016 2:27:10 PM
^^^It sounds like she left out the part about taking the Skyride or tram up the mountain.
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 62
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/20/2016 2:43:47 PM
My first day in the Southwest Texas mountainous desert last summer, I hiked 20 miles with elevation rises a little over 5000 feet.

It took all 10 hours of sunlight. And I thought I was going to need a medic afterwards.

13 miles in 21 minutes is a far faster pace than anyone completed the Boston Marathon on Monday. That has to be a typo. She's generally pretty accurate about hiking (if nothing else).
 PassionateSunnyGal
Joined: 7/23/2015
Msg: 63
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/20/2016 8:27:38 PM
I think what happens is most people want what they want and so what they consider to be DATING ETIQUETTE is what suits them--without realizing that it does take TWO to date and just cause someone else has a different preference it doesn't mean they are wrong--they just aren't a good match for you.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 64
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 6:19:10 AM
Sunny - yes, I agree. Doesn't seem to be a rule book anywhere ( altho it would be helpful)
Sometimes we need to step outside our comfort zone
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 65
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 10:25:51 AM
Hmmm…. Looks like I need to clarify. LiterateHiker did not literally say what I posted before, namely:


We hiked 13 miles with a 5,000 feet rise in elevation in 21 minutes flat!

What I was doing there is called “exaggeration for emphasis”, also known as hyperbole. She did talk, and quite often, about how long and difficult her hikes were, and how her dates could never keep up. She really thought that anyone who could not keep up with her hiking ability was inferior, and not worthy of her. It got so bad that I once challenged her to come to the gym and engage in a weight lifting contest with me.

If she could not bench press as many pounds as me, then she was not worthy of dating. Which is ridiculous, as almost anyone would agree. And I was trying to make the point to her that men did not have to match her hiking abilities to be “worthy”, but I don’t think she ever understood that point.

But then again, anyone who would hand their date (initial meeting date) a pack of dental floss is not exactly attuned to the subtleties of life.
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 66
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 1:37:46 PM
Ripped, holey jeans ..sometimes I have asked a woman if she needed money for some new pants, or just a new pair.
Some laugh, a few don't get it, or are offended..I usually mean it as humor.
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 67
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 2:12:16 PM
OHenry
She really thought that anyone who could not keep up with her hiking ability was inferior, and not worthy of her.

Or who could not cut a lemon the correct way.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 70
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 3:29:25 PM
But you see she made an impression.
There is a correct way to cut lemons? I'm peasant stock
 caballerosiempre
Joined: 12/5/2015
Msg: 71
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 3:34:00 PM
Where's LH now? Hiking with a coterie..menagerie? of super-cats? Who can keep up..and of course with superb dental hygiene..trained to use dental floss 3 x per day.
Flossing my cats, I hiked 32 miles that day..
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 72
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/21/2016 5:15:29 PM
No.. at least she stayed in the game. My favorite was ( not her I think)
" he had more facial warts than I thought" I mean how many did you think he had? Was he a giant facewart? This stuck with me - I started looking for facial warts on myself and others.
I mean, how do you miss them in the pictures?
Nothing wrong with warts btw
But
WTH?
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 73
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Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/22/2016 10:52:44 AM

Ouija2025
No.. at least she stayed in the game. My favorite was ( not her I think)
" he had more facial warts than I thought" I mean how many did you think he had? Was he a giant facewart? This stuck with me - I started looking for facial warts on myself and others.
I mean, how do you miss them in the pictures?
Nothing wrong with warts btw
But
WTH?


I remember that thread! My first thought was that was LH, but on further reflection, I think it was the lady who lives in Wyoming (?), used to have a picture of herself on the shooting range, and also talked about having an initial coffee meet with a billionaire. The last time I saw her on here, her main profile pic featured Elton John type sunglasses.

I do remember the thread warped into talking about skin tags, and the removal thereof. And as I recall, it was skin tags and not warts.
 excusezmoi
Joined: 3/11/2016
Msg: 75
Does anyone follow DATING ETIQUETTE anymore?
Posted: 4/22/2016 5:42:36 PM
This is a dating site, so I would be delighted to be invited on a date.

However, my readiness to date is mutually exclusive from any readiness to mate! I ensure that I pay my way so that I am not beholden to anyone, and I provide my own transport and meet him there.

I am not a dressy sort of person, so I don't require 8 hours to primp myself. I make sure that contacts know that I am not that sort of person, so there is no disappointment. A 4pm invitation for a Thursday night would suit me fine as I consider that there is plenty of time to tidy myself up, and the night will be less bustly than a Friday night. I prefer quieter settings where conversation can flow easily.

I have learned that no matter how logical and prepared I am, there are creeps out there, and caution, caution and more caution and a bit more caution besides.... If they're hankering for sex, get rid of them poste haste. A lot of men are just vile, and make it that much more difficult for the decent guys to get a look in the door. I met a guy for an extended coffee date. I took my own transport, shared the cost and we talked for about three hours and got on fabulously. I invited him home to dinner next day (what a waste of good food) and he started wanting to get gropey. I said no because I don't know you well enough to do that. He went home. A couple of days later his partner found my number in his phone and called me. Poor woman. She told me he 'does this all the time'.

I consider it necessary to have at least some conversation prior to a date. Any concerns need to be expressed and addressed. Assume nothing.
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