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 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 201
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?Page 9 of 10    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10)
Urs2discoverGTA, My gut reaction to your story is.......your spidey senses were spot on! Nothing this man did in those 9 minutes
were "a good idea".
 Urs2discoverGTA
Joined: 3/20/2015
Msg: 202
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 2:05:55 PM

I'm sure his idiotic frustration is a by-product of his overall dating-scene frustration and not realizing how much he's become impatient with it all and out in left field. Yikes. :)


I don't feel like I'm able to accurately convey the psycho look on this guy's face when he realized he was not getting me into his car. Think Jack Nicholson and the Shining, Way beyond "overall dating scene frustration". I was able to get some information from him as we waited for our order. I asked him how long he had been single. He said 2 months. This was not merely an over eager guy, looking to make everything happen Just-Like-That. I'm thankful I dodged that IED.
 gotahubcapdiamondstarhalo
Joined: 9/21/2016
Msg: 203
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 2:12:37 PM
You did the right thing.

Don't let the previous poster make you doubt yourself. He can't communicate very well and his "logic" is mostly free association with no deductive thought process. Too convoluted and hard to read, so I don't bother.

Anyway, don't let anyone make you doubt your choice to avoid getting in his car and
Continue to trust your gut.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 204
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 2:15:22 PM
GTA, in my opinion you were spot on with your gut feeling there, and it sounds as if you definitely dodged a bullet.

That guy sounds very scary, and good for you for trusting your instincts!
 halcyon_skies
Joined: 7/27/2015
Msg: 205
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 2:34:53 PM

I asked him how long he had been single. He said 2 months. This was not merely an over eager guy, looking to make everything happen Just-Like-That. I'm thankful I dodged that IED.


Single for only two months would have raised a red flag with me. It's too soon after his previous relationship---he might not yet be over his ex, and he could be on the rebound.

I think you were right to trust your instincts. Something about him seemed more than a little "off".
 Urs2discoverGTA
Joined: 3/20/2015
Msg: 206
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 2:51:45 PM
Thank you everyone. You guys are a great group!

I'm sure many "predators" use the approach of trying to make you feel as if youre being ridiculous by being cautious and then you question your own intuition. I'm old enough to know that mine should be listened to.

I agree that 2 months is too soon. If I had been able to communicate with her before meeting, that would have been enough of a concern to take a pass.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 207
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 3:16:10 PM

LISTEN TO YOUR GUT LADIES AND GENTS!

I dunno -- I never liked that line.


You don't have to like it. But, it works for most people.
Especially people that are paying attention.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 208
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 6:56:02 PM

Single for only two months would have raised a red flag with me. It's too soon after his previous relationship---he might not yet be over his ex, and he could be on the rebound.

Not necessarily though. I wouldn't see it as a red flag -- but more questioning what their previous relationship was. Many people take themselves out of the dating scene and are considered taken for a couple months, but then things don't work out with the person they were dating -- so then having been back on the market for another 2 months is a bad thing? I wouldn't think so. Point is, I don't think being not single should be assumed being in a solidified LTR.

I think you were right to trust your instincts. Something about him seemed more than a little "off".

Well, if she walked to his car and he had to politely clear the passenger seat from the roll of duct tape, baseball bat, and yards of rope -- then yeah -- definitely a good thing! ;) The odd thing is him acting like "Huh? Wth?" of her not wanting to get in his car in the corner of the parking lot to Kick Off a coffee date - lol. I don't think he (necessarily) had any evil intentions -- but he was in the very least out in left field. Suggesting it wouldn't be a bad thing if it was library-quiet and no matter where ya sat people would overhear (I've listened to intro-dates; they can be funny) -- but he should also realize thru common sense it'd be one of those "I know this is weird, but just throwing this idea out there," sorta things (but still not good game).

You don't have to like it. But, it works for most people.
Especially people that are paying attention.

Yeah, but it backfires and is ineffective in situations with those (guys) who are truly effective in their ways -- not guys who flip out for not running to the corner of the parking lot to hop in his car at night to kick off a coffee date as if that's the norm. No "spidey sense" or "intuition" required - lol.
 halcyon_skies
Joined: 7/27/2015
Msg: 209
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 7:17:47 PM


Single for only two months would have raised a red flag with me. It's too soon after his previous relationship---he might not yet be over his ex, and he could be on the rebound.


Not necessarily though. I wouldn't see it as a red flag -- but more questioning what their previous relationship was.


*Sigh* Okaaay... perhaps not a red flag, but at least a yellow one---i.e. proceed with caution, and clarify with him the length of his previous relationship, as well as the reason(s) why the relationship ended.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 210
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 7:47:06 PM

Single for only two months would have raised a red flag with me


Forget the flag. I would imagine miles and miles of orange barrels!
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 211
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 8:55:46 PM
^^^^^ Too many orange barrels in my area. I'm taking about the road construction, not the tanning bed broads.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 212
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/16/2017 9:54:33 PM

*Sigh* Okaaay... perhaps not a red flag, but at least a yellow one---i.e. proceed with caution, and clarify with him the length of his previous relationship, as well as the reason(s) why the relationship ended.

Well I'm Not trying to be uber-picky or splitting hairs, Honest! :)

Just making the difference between "How long has it been since you were dating someone?" vs "How long has it been since you were in an LTR?" One's going to bring an "Oh," response if it's been just 2 months, the other really shouldn't.

I think it's quite common to run into someone who, sure, was dating someone for a hot minute (off the market), but not anymore -- and it ending 2 months ago.

If one's casually dating out there, I would put the latter as a yellow flag. If one's LTR-hunting, it'd be a red flag as far as compatibility/timing/being-on-the-same-page is concerned.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 213
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 8:20:40 AM
Good grief NG. No sane woman going to go down a dark street to sit in a strangers car.
They were already someplace, he didn't want ppl to hear his conversation? Wonder what he was planning to say " so do you like ball gags and putting lotion on the skin?"
 Urs2discoverGTA
Joined: 3/20/2015
Msg: 214
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 8:42:19 AM
"It puts the lotion in the basket ......."
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 215
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 9:21:04 AM

Yeah, but it backfires and is ineffective in situations with those (guys) who are truly effective in their ways


As with most things, using your gut, doesn't mean you just shut off your brain. Common sense can be used to.

Women especially have to use every tool available to them because of the dirt bags, and salesmen. Any sane man will be able to understand women being leary, especially if they don't have a clue on who you really are. Hell, I can understand women being leary of me even after getting to knowing me for a decade.
 gotahubcapdiamondstarhalo
Joined: 9/21/2016
Msg: 216
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 9:59:10 AM

Yeah, but it backfires and is ineffective in situations with those (guys) who are truly effective in their ways -


How ridiculous ...

How would you even pretend to KNOW this?

Maybe people who become victims of "those (guys)" are the ones who IGNORED their gut/intuition.

Absurd.

But, thanks for the input, Mr. FBI Profiler.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 217
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 10:11:43 AM
Listening to your intuition, gut feelings, radar, spidy sense, or whatever you want to call it, is the most important thing in dating. It steers you away from rejection, danger, and pain. Ask a safety expert. Some guys don't get that.

So glad this woman did the right thing and did not get in a man's car after meeting for only 9 mins.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 218
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 1/17/2017 10:12:07 AM
Ah yes, the unsub
How can it possibly backfire except of course he doesn't get the human sacrifice or whatever
Next up - NG thinks if the guy has a nice voice sure meet him after midnight in the graveyard out of town
Bring your own rope and tarp :)
 vacuumanddusting
Joined: 6/29/2018
Msg: 219
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/7/2018 5:45:42 PM
All was good, conversation flowed and I thought this guy is so great. Has everyone heard the saying "too good to be true"? Well that was this case. I made the stupid mistake of asking him why his past relationship never worked out. He told me he suspected his gal of cheating as she was acting strange. So, he proceeds to GPS her vehicle and then catches her. I was like what? You had to GPS her? So I told him prior to this he already had the answer. If you are going to GPS your partner's vehicle you know the answer already. He agreed. We parted our ways and I ran to my car. He seemed oh so normal! That was really untrusting and I could not handle that!
 Abby156
Joined: 4/1/2010
Msg: 220
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/7/2018 6:53:07 PM
all this one man did was talk about is covert actions and guns. too paranoid for me.
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/8/2018 10:06:43 AM
I haven't read the 9 pages of replies yet but definitely will. There has to be some good stuff in here!!!

I'll add two stories to this. The first was when I felt like I was having a threesome on the first date. Yup! It was me, her and her cell phone. She left her car in a parking lot near her house. The restaurant we were going to was about a half hour away. She checked it a few times during the ride there and was on it a lot at the restaurant. Before we ordered I asked if her phone wanted anything. I said it with a smile hoping she'd get the hint. Nope! Back to texting more after we ate. We were talking through all this but it was a total turn off. She asked where we were going next as we were leaving. Seemed disappointed when I told her I was going to be dropping her off. Of course she was still on the phone on the way back. I don't remember if I stopped when we got back to her car. I kept picturing the push and roll thing as we got to the lot.

The other is when I learned to be leery of profiles that only show a person from the chin up. Woman send me a message so we started talking. She just had a couple of pics. All of her face which was cute. We made plans to go out after I dropped my kids off Sunday night. She suggested a ghost walk tour which I've never been on. I told her that sounded good so she said she'd buy tickets. I thought that was nice of her to pay for our first date. Sunday afternoon she asked if I wanted her to pick me up, Wow! She paid for tickets AND she offered to drive! Something wasn't right... I declined the offer. I would be out anyway and didn't mind driving to meet her. She sent me a couple of messages as I was on the way. One said she's be standing outside her car. Another said something about two guys hitting on her. I saw red flags all over the place! It seemed like she was really selling herself. I got down there a few minutes later. I looked over and saw her across an uncrowded Walmart parking lot. GQ no longer returns my calls so I know I won't be in their magazine. But there comes a point when a person might want to know about extremes. So... a devil and angel popped up on my shoulders as I looked over and saw my date. I couldn't miss her because I'm going to estimate she weighted at least 350 pounds (at least). It's not like she was a tall woman either. All of that was on a body that might have been 5 1/2' tall. At this point devil and angel scrapping it out. Devil was saying "Drive fast!!! Keep going!!! and Save yourself!!!". Angel was saying "N0, we can not do that. You can't just leave her there". Angel won so I stopped. She suggested driving to the hotel where the tour started so I agreed. The ironic part is... the hotel was the same one I stayed at the night I got married. My wife was about 1/4 of the size of her. We got there early so we had time to talk. She told me her husband recently passed away. Like... 6 weeks before. I had to ask if she felt she should be dating so soon after he died. She told me he wouldn't want her to be sitting home alone. So the tour starts. It was a walking tour around town. I found we were always at the back of the pack. The reason was because she couldn't keep up with the casual pace everyone was walking. So I started to drag further behind so it looked like I was the one holding us up. We made it through the tour and back to her car. At that point she gave me a small gift bag. It's been years so I don't remember what was in it. Nothing expensive. Just something thoughtful that I probably mentioned I liked while we were texting. She was a very nice person but wasn't the person for me.
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/8/2018 10:11:42 AM

All was good, conversation flowed and I thought this guy is so great. Has everyone heard the saying "too good to be true"? Well that was this case. I made the stupid mistake of asking him why his past relationship never worked out. He told me he suspected his gal of cheating as she was acting strange. So, he proceeds to GPS her vehicle and then catches her. I was like what? You had to GPS her? So I told him prior to this he already had the answer. If you are going to GPS your partner's vehicle you know the answer already. He agreed. We parted our ways and I ran to my car. He seemed oh so normal! That was really untrusting and I could not handle that!


I think he had a reason to not trust her but wanted to verify it. I caught my ex-wife on a date with the guy that is now her second husband. I would have been blind to everything that was going on if I didn't do a little detective work. That turned into something that could be a Lifetime movie. Have to walk in the other person's shoes to know what they've gone through and why they've done certain things.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 223
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/9/2018 4:41:53 AM
"all this one man did was talk about is covert actions and guns"

>>>ironically, the one talking the most about such a secret life, is the one who doesn't have it. They tend to not hire blabbermouths who actually want attention :)
 BuretoDesu
Joined: 7/1/2018
Msg: 224
What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/9/2018 6:13:14 PM
What started out as a meet and greet for coffee turned into watching a live demolition derby.

It sounded like a good idea at the time, but there was no connection ... at all. And I didn't want to leave until I saw some of the show, so I waited, and waited, and finally left after an hour and a half (I think).
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 225
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What's the Worst Date You Ever Had ?
Posted: 7/9/2018 6:28:54 PM

LISTEN TO YOUR GUT


Yeah, that's not a "red flag" when someone has conversations with their stomach.


LISTEN TO YOUR GUT


Mine usually just growls when it wants food.
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