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 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 51
How much do you weigh?Page 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

My preference is to be with someone who cares about themselves enough not to abuse their bodies with food..


I hear you.

All those people scarfing down tofu and rice cakes and wheatgrass. (shudder) Awful.

Now, where did leave my donut?


The trouble with Online dating is most of that judgement is done based on the most shallow of circumstances - mainly a single photo or maybe a couple lines of text.


Yes.
It's a shame that community colleges don't offer a course called "How to Make Good Snap Judgments".


I have a dream


Whoa, 1963 flashback.
 Kay9876
Joined: 7/4/2012
Msg: 52
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How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/25/2016 6:53:59 PM

Msg. 53 (Quoting me in Msg. 52): If an individual weighs 50-100 pounds more than a healthy weight (as determined by qualified professionals), then it’s obvious he/she needs a lifestyle change and/or intervention to address a medical issue causing the excess weight.

Msg. 53 (Your response): How overweight am I? Or is that too difficult to tell - from a profile?

Danimal, you’re a good looking man. From what I can tell, you don’t carry 50-100+ pounds above what is considered healthy (for you) by qualified professionals. It’s not possible to tell from a photo exactly how much excess weight a person is carrying, but it’s often possible to tell when someone is carrying an unhealthy amount of excess weight. I mentioned 50-100+ because I thought that much would usually be noticeable in photos. My post was more about health issues impacted by weight than weight, per se, especially among older daters.

Msg. 53: Don't get me wrong about being against a healthy weight. I dropped 50 pounds and put 15 back when I started weight training. The difference has been amazing. Yet, some people who don't know that and don't know me - don't care and assume whatever the hell they want. It bugs me that people think others can't possibly understand what it's like because they are not the exact same. It's stupidly naive and even arrogant at times. … Having compatibility with another involves an understanding and empathy of each other, not a cloning of their lives. Almost IS indeed good enough, in a lot of cases.

Congratulations on losing weight and starting a weight-training program! I think it’s sexy for you to be tending to your health. To me, being sexy requires wisdom and caring, and making a reasonable effort toward good health is a sign of both.

I agree, too, that “having compatibility with another involves an understanding and empathy of each other, not a cloning of their lives” and “almost is indeed good enough, in a lot of cases.” I like the way you think things through and often stand up for your views. I think you’ll be a wonderful boyfriend and husband (assuming you aren’t already a boyfriend).

 raisehill
Joined: 5/2/2016
Msg: 53
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/26/2016 7:10:32 AM
"The trouble with Online dating is most of that judgement is done based on the most shallow of circumstances - mainly a single photo or maybe a couple lines of text. People are genetically predisposed to being large"

Its not shallow to be attracted or not, nor are people genetically predisposed to being large.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 54
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/26/2016 7:17:03 AM

The trouble with Online dating is most of that judgement is done based on the most shallow of circumstances - mainly a single photo or maybe a couple lines of text.


I am flexible in the beginning. I went out on dates with people that had mediocre photos or were somewhat different than my usual type. Having said that, sometimes there are dealbreakers that are noticeable. Such as obesity or a negative profile.
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 55
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 5:59:56 AM
Body weight does not tell the whole story. BMI is the body mass index for couch potatoes. Guys that measure their bodypart inches are disturbing unless you're a professional bodybuilder and you require those numbers for progress tracking and statistics.

Facts:
Muscle weighs more than fat
You need to know the bodyfat percentage in order to calculate how "unhealthy overweight" a person is.
A person who is 5'7" and 250 lbs that is a couch potato and a person who is 5'7" and 250 lbs. who has been into physical for 10+ years will look significantly different - one will look great naked and one will not!

Weight for me does not matter. It's just a number that has little meaning behind it unless you have body fat percentage and an understanding of that person's lifestyle.
 Kay9876
Joined: 7/4/2012
Msg: 56
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How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 9:17:06 AM




Msg. 58: A person who is 5'7" and 250 lbs that is a couch potato and a person who is 5'7" and 250 lbs. who has been into physical for 10+ years will look significantly different - one will look great naked and one will not!

Weight for me does not matter. It's just a number that has little meaning behind it unless you have body fat percentage and an understanding of that person's lifestyle.

An individual who is 5’7” and weighs 250 pounds weighs about 90 pounds over the BMI scale for normal (healthy) weight. Though the BMI scale isn’t always the target for professional and/or hardcore athletes, weight reaching 50% or more above normal cannot, nor should it be, maintained for a healthy, high quality lifespan.

It’s easy to say the BMI scale inaccurately categorizes athletes, but too many “athletes” have relatively sedentary jobs and find themselves struggling to lose excess weight after their passion (sports, body building, etc.) fades or is overcome by other demands in life.

As people age, it becomes more difficult to lose excess weight and keep it off. Since we know this, some people looking for a long-term relationship consider not only whether a person looks “great naked” (your description), but how one’s attitude about weight can impact future health. And since you mentioned being naked, sexual health is impacted by general health.

Weight is more than a number. Like looking into a pool of water, weight is a reflection of something. The real thing can’t be fully seen in the water and must be explored in real life to be known, but the reflection provides a clue to the nature of the being the caused it.
 TheRebelYell
Joined: 5/10/2016
Msg: 57
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 9:50:25 AM
Anyone over the age of 12 knows about weight. Everyone of us knows what our optimum weight is or should be or where we feel the best and look the best. What is with all this crap about BMI and posting your height and weight b.s.? Post a picture, I can tell by looking at your picture if you are thin, average or fat. If I meet you, I can tell if you're thin, average or fat. We're adults, why are you bothering with the math and height/weight/BMI? Find someone that you find attractive. And IF you solely go by "must have a BMI of 26 to contact me", you're a little on the juvenile side, maybe even a little anal.
 2ufo
Joined: 2/28/2015
Msg: 58
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 10:18:51 AM

And IF you solely go by "must have a BMI of 26 to contact me", you're a little on the juvenile side, maybe even a little anal.


And, thus not worth dating.
Not because you (generic) don't like larger people but because you're too rigid to realize there are exceptions (and usually LOTS of them) to every circumstance in life.

Life usually laughs and plays jokes on people with no flexibility.
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 59
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 11:28:17 AM
So I just ran my height and weight through the BMI calculator:

5'7", 253 lbs.: BMI is between 35-39.99 (Obese Class 2). It says I'M GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

LOL.

I have an office job. It's all about lifestyle. I've never been an athlete, never competed professionally, I do it for ME because I was tired of bring the opposite of healthy. In the 1990's I wanted to change, I read books and learned the science of fitness and nutrition and applied it to my life. High intensity interval training, weight training, eating and sleeping. I have a "sedentary" job - and I don't even spent a lot of time in the gym: cardio is high intensity interval training for 20 minutes 2-3 times a week, weight training is 1 to 1.5 hours 2-3 times a week.

At age 41, I'm the breaking personal weightlifting records, I'm looking and feeling great.... anyone that's interested in this stuff should pick up the book Body-for-LIFE by Bill Phillips. That's what changed my life. I did the 12 week challenge. I'm stronger and leaner now than I was in my 20's and 30's, and I still enjoy things like junk food on occasion.

I was a bullied fat kid who got skinny in high school from smoking cigarettes then starting getting fat again after high school since there was no more gym classes.... and I am an intellectual, I seek BRAINS!

But... my BMI says I am Obese Class 2 and I'm going to DIE and I need to seek medical attention immediately! That cracks me up!

LIFE IS TOO SHORT NOT TO TAKE CARE OF YOU! It's NEVER too late! And YES bodyweight is just a number, I am LIVING PROOF!

:-)
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 60
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 11:56:20 AM
^^ So why no full body shot up if you are going to boast?
I agree with rebel.. we can clearly see if someone is over or under upon meeting them.
Even with two pairs of Spanx! lol
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 61
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 12:41:43 PM
I look great when I go to the Circus fun house.

I'm gonna go buy some XXL speedos when I find them too.

Nobody's gonna know their size. Just me...
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 62
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How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 12:57:24 PM

^^ So why no full body shot up if you are going to boast?

Good point. I'll believe that EatLiftLaugh is in about as good position as one could be at 5'7" 253lbs... but it's still not at a healthy level at all. If he was 5'7" at just hitting 200lbs, I could see someone possibly being at a healthy body level (raw muscle like a NFL running back who's short).
 HawkingJr
Joined: 4/16/2007
Msg: 63
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How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 1:41:15 PM
For all those who say posting full length pictures is the trick: the reason POF and other dating websites have body type categories is for searches. A user can’t search for a certain type of picture. I also think searching by weight would be highly problematic, for many of the reasons already detailed in this thread. Deciding one’s “body type” is certainly imperfect, but it’s probably the best solution possible for searches. And most people are “close enough” on their self-categorization, at least for me. I usually exclude BBWs from my searches and rarely come across a woman who looks like she belongs in the BBW category instead of the “few extra pounds” or “average” she decided to go with.

“Athletic” is definitely one of the trickier categories. Most NFL offensive linemen are without a doubt “athletic” by definition and could probably run circles around most of the people in this thread, yet 6’2” 350 pound guys are obese by BMI scales, and they certainly aren’t the same kind of “athletic” a 6’2” 250 pound linebacker or a 6’2” 200 pound receiver are. I coached women’s softball for years and some of those women looked to naked eye like they were at least “a few extra pounds” but were muscular as hell and could run wind sprints like nobody’s business. I wouldn’t get into an argument with most people who identify themselves as “athletic” just because they aren’t built like an Olympic sprinter. It’s easy enough to just look at their pictures after they come up in the search and skip over them if you don’t find them attractive, regardless of what they claim their body type to be – no search that includes body type can ever be perfectly efficient, but OLD sites that don’t use body type at all will always be rather inefficient for those who care about body type.
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 64
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 1:55:03 PM
Posting full body pics have resulted in no messages received, women telling me they're out of my league, intimidated, feel that I'm showing off etc. I show my face, state I'm athletic, and get to know this sophisticated person behind the screen. It's happened long ago with meeting women... just face pics... and show up and they are models basically. But more times they are not....but it's worth the risk. I've had some good relationships. I was engaged to a Canadian female hockey player a decade ago.

HawkingJr is absolutely correct. Even though I was skinnier in high school my legs were insane - they were always trying to recruit me for high school football. But I was more interested in being behind a computer and was never into sports.

I am lucky to have some blessed genetics as far as muscle mass goes thanks to my parents.

Getting custom clothes sucks.

I am not unhealthy by any means, no one comes close to guessing my weight in person. I don't look my weight because I'm not fat!
 SLAFFA
Joined: 8/13/2007
Msg: 65
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 2:28:16 PM
Seems pretty uncomplicated. Like with anything concerning OLD, if or when in doubt, and/or IF body "style" is important, just use the KISS principle. Post a reasonably "current" full length pic or 2 with a DATE on it, and let folks decide for themselves. BAIT, plain and simple. Better bait usually means more Fish hooked. Landing them is another matter.

I don't think for one second that BF decided to allow every single member at least 8 pics so they could show 8 tight face shots.

Of course, I could be wrong.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 66
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How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 3:29:54 PM

Posting full body pics have resulted in no messages received, women telling me they're out of my league

Which seems to imply it's worse. Which seems to imply it's not an athletically shaped body as in being "in shape" from a visual point of view.

, intimidated, feel that I'm showing off etc.

Wait -- this conflicts with the above though. They're intimidated by someone when they think they themselves are out of that person's league?

If you are in shape, show your body. If you're not, I agree, it may not be the best bet.
 TheRebelYell
Joined: 5/10/2016
Msg: 67
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 7:08:47 PM
Being a weight lifter doesn't always mean you are healthy. Many weightliftrs ignore cardio, take many supplements (many unhealthy), play with steroids and growth hormones and a heart attack waiting to happen. Some, not all. And, IMO, it's an unattractive "look" being all muscled up like a prize bull out to stud. JMO. So, you can lift weights and it doesn't mean you're in shape.

Sometimes we get a big ole surprise at who we look at and go - "I'm really attracted to him/her and they are totally not what I'm usually attracted to." It's so much better when we get to an age where the inside starts to trump the outside in what we deem attractive.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 68
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 5/31/2016 7:49:28 PM
^^^
You got that right!

A female power lifter sent me some of her workout videos to convince me she was athletic.

I could tell she worked out, but her figure still resembled a square. She had no neck.

If you're not willing to wear Speedos or a Thong, sober with the lights on, you're NOT athletic.

YMMV
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 69
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 7:28:24 AM
On the conflict: No messages RECEIVED initially, but the few that would respond to my message to them to BEGIN a conversation, that's where I would hear "I'm out of their league"

Recently I spoke to someone on the phone for a week, we were getting along great, she was calling me every night. Then 5 hours before our date that she said she was looking forward to, I get this text: "I'm sorry but I think you're really out of my league. You'd probably be better of resting up tonight. Good luck!"

What the heck?!?! And.. I've heard that many times before people actually MEET ME in person. That's my biggest struggle - getting the person to SHOW UP. I've been stood up and cancelled on more times than I could count. They always bail at the last moment (day of or hours before.)

I will say - the few I have met over the past 15 years online, some of them have become very good friends! Even after they have gotten married and had kids - I am still in their life, I have even attended the wedding of someone I met online and ended up becoming friends with - since 2007! I've hung out with her husband, her kids. Life is good :-) just looking for my match.

Online dating is complicated. Everyone has different (and mostly negative) experiences - some women like skinny men, some women like NBA player type men, some women like men that look like linebackers or professional wrestlers. A lot of women do have self esteem issues (as do men on here) - and the less I "show off" - the less**** of a person I come across as... the less I show, I feel that I give women the opportunity to try and approach me without being intimidated/scared of rejection.

:-)
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 70
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 7:33:57 AM
Power lifters are a whole different category of people which I am not.

I do live a mostly bodybuilder lifestyle, although I do not compete. To me, it's fun, it's challenging, and it makes me a better and stronger person inside and out - from being a leader at work, to being there for my friends and family.

If I could sum it up.... "LIVING LIFE AT FULL STRENGTH" ... people that have never transformed their body or have done a physical fitness challenge for 12 weeks won't "get it"....
 tbicon32
Joined: 5/12/2016
Msg: 71
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 8:41:25 AM
^^^^ No matter how much muscle you have no matter how fit you are, its hard for me to see how being 250+ pounds at only 5'7 is even remotely healthy. Assuming you are all muscle, that will come back to haunt you when you are older.

For what its worth, the best weight is being "lean", fast, strong, and limber. Being overly muscled does nothing for your health. If it did, body builders would not have life expediencies sometimes as small as the fifties.

It is of course important to be strong to avoid the pitfuls of older age, to avoid future disabilities. It is not important to be able to dead lift hundreds of pounds.

It is important to have cardiovascular health, and though I too have been doing intense interval training on a regular basis, as well as steady state for years . . . studies show that moderate exercise, maybe thirty minutes continually throughout the day, is the best for longevity, and after that pushing too hard not only provides diminishing returns, but at some point can reduce your longevity. Example . . .Marathon runners can damage their own hearts as scans of older runners show these people often have significant scarring in their hearts.

And as an added bonus . . . the most attractive look for a guy in the eyes of most woman is lean and strong . . . think David (the Statute in Rome . . on a smaller scale of course)

One other thing, its difficult for me to believe women will turn down dates with you by asserting you are out of their league. Ten to one, this is their way of gently telling you they are not interested imho.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 72
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 8:57:17 AM
I think EatFitLaugh is really Karma.

She's mocking unfit men with his profile.

Too transparent Karma.

Hahahaha
 TheRebelYell
Joined: 5/10/2016
Msg: 73
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 9:52:29 AM

If I could sum it up.... "LIVING LIFE AT FULL STRENGTH" ... people that have never transformed their body or have done a physical fitness challenge for 12 weeks won't "get it".


Ummm. Boy, there is way more to life than "living life at full strength" and your interpretation of getting it.

I think Tbicon nailed it too. Long, lean, limber and the cardio beats huge and muscular in the health department.

And its too bad about "leagues", never heard that from a man before, it kind of makes me laugh a bit. Especially when there isn't much to go - wow, he's out of my league. But I've noticed the same when women say it too.
 EatLiftLaugh
Joined: 5/18/2016
Msg: 74
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 10:16:25 AM
TheRebelYell,

I was referring to women telling ME that I am out of their league, or they are out of MY league. I never say that to anyone. I am certainly the minority here. Living life at full strength has to do with my life story. So, you don't get it. Because you are not me. Have a great day.
 halcyon_skies
Joined: 7/27/2015
Msg: 75
How much do you weigh?
Posted: 6/1/2016 10:45:48 AM

If I could sum it up.... "LIVING LIFE AT FULL STRENGTH" ... people that have never transformed their body or have done a physical fitness challenge for 12 weeks won't "get it"....


I suppose I must not "get it". Somehow, whenever I hear the term, "FULL STRENGTH", I'm reminded more of a strong, pungent odor, rather than someone possessing great strength.
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