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 SrqDJ
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 51
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
^^^^^
Really? So you think she likes you enough, in what a couple of hours, that she wants to sleep with you?


Well at least you've given her a few hours to decide lol

As opposed to some on these sites that expect you to want to have sex with them the first time they send you a message!
But that is probably a topic for another thread.... or not
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 52
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 10:29:53 AM
Thinking that a woman is a slut or a man is a player because they had sex on the first date / meeting is an assumption. There are couples that are married or in relationships that had sex on the first date.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 53
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 10:38:08 AM
"Thinking that a woman is a slut or a man is a player because they had sex on the first date / meeting is an assumption"


So, is thinking Jordan Spieth could kick my butt if I played golf with him.

It's an assumption , and a pretty safe one too.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 54
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How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 10:41:39 AM

ClooneysTutor
There's gotta be at least a 1% chance of sex happening.

0%? I'm won't agree to the...DATE.


+1

Inner_Gorilla
I call it a date, not a meet. To me a meet does not have romantic intentions, while a date does. If there's incompatibility, so be it, but it was tested because it was a date.

I do believe CT and IG are both saying the same thing here.



0% scenarios -

She calls it a MEET!

She mentions going out of town a few days after our scheduled date.

She mentions her other plans immediately after our meet/date.

She lives a half hour away, or more, and doesn't live alone.

Coffee & Lunch Dates.

If a woman tells me that she can meet me for a drink after work at 5:30, but she has to leave by 6:00 to be at another event at 6:30 – I’m not going. Many of my initial meets or dates or whatever have only lasted 30 minutes, but I insist on the possibility of more.

And what’s this about a lunch date not having the minimum 1% chance? You’ve never had a nooner? Or experienced afternoon delight? I admit the odds are stacked against you, but you were the one who said ”1%”, you did not say “50%”. (smile)


VOTE NO ON ZERO CHANCE OF SEX DATES!


A platform I can support, and vote for every time!
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 55
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:02:15 AM
To each their own. I don't make judgments about someone having sex on the first date when I know very little else about them. Unlike a professional athlete that has a proven and public track record about his/her skills or talent.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 56
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:13:25 AM
"I don't make judgments about someone having sex on the first date when I know very little else about them. "


It's not a judgment , I don't look down on them. I just don't want to catch an STD and/or think that I COULD BE one of many.
 Inner_Gorilla
Joined: 12/3/2015
Msg: 57
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:15:57 AM

If a woman tells me that she can meet me for a drink after work at 5:30, but she has to leave by 6:00 to be at another event at 6:30 – I’m not going. Many of my initial meets or dates or whatever have only lasted 30 minutes, but I insist on the possibility of more.


Totally agree with this OHenry.

I even had a situation when we were going to have the date and the tells me that because she has not seen her daughter, she would have to cut the date short to about 7:00. I told her that she should be with her daughter, that we could meet some other time. I even left it open, and did not even suggest a time or DATE.

About a week later, she email me and told me how great it was to see her daughter and how much she appreciated that I understood and that she was open to get together again. We did. It was fun. But she didn't do it for me in person. So that is life.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 58
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:16:29 AM
This is all good stuff.

Going off the dinner thread, apparently some women Tidy the Kitty before the first dinner.

That doesn't sound like a 0% assumption on her part.

Is she then a playa?

Or is that reserved for the gal that tidys up before the first meet at Starbucks?
 Cdan1957
Joined: 9/17/2013
Msg: 59
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/2/2016 11:26:07 AM

To each their own. I don't make judgments about someone having sex on the first date when I know very little else about them.


I do, whether I want to or not. Everything that occurs during the initial meeting causes an opinion, assumption, judgement. I did not go into the first meeting thinking or wanting to get laid. If it moved into that direction or even if she suggested it might a second date isn't going to happen.




Going off the dinner thread, apparently some women Tidy the Kitty before the first dinner.

That doesn't sound like a 0% assumption on her part.


I would never know if they did or not. The zero percent is definitely on my part so because of that I have always assumed it is on her part too. So the attention her "Kitty" got before the first meet was something that would forever go unknown.
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 60
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/2/2016 3:06:47 PM
Exact numbers evade me but probably only 10% of my dates go to second or third.

Relationships are not easy. Its hard to pair up two strangers.

Lucky are those 5% who find their long term partner.

BUT-- why not try and try again :)
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 61
How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/3/2016 5:53:59 AM

doesn't that make him a rake?
....Absolutely.


Thank you Sir cdan, for getting this!
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 62
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 6:06:59 AM

It's not a judgment , I don't look down on them. I just don't want to catch an STD and/or think that I COULD BE one of many.


Suppose a woman wanted until the 3rd date to have sex. I don't think that necessarily means she is less likely to be promiscuous or cheat on me. I don't know her past history.


I do, whether I want to or not. Everything that occurs during the initial meeting causes an opinion, assumption, judgement. I did not go into the first meeting thinking or wanting to get laid. If it moved into that direction or even if she suggested it might a second date isn't going to happen.


In general, I think this is one of the problems with OLD. People making snap judgments and assuming the worst based on very limited info. If I liked someone overall, I would give them the benefit of the doubt for now. I can always reassess the situation in the future if/when something else happens.
 Cdan1957
Joined: 9/17/2013
Msg: 63
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 6:50:22 AM

In general, I think this is one of the problems with OLD. People making snap judgments and assuming the worst based on very limited info. If I liked someone overall, I would give them the benefit of the doubt for now. I can always reassess the situation in the future if/when something else happens.


Of course you are making a snap judgement, you have a couple of hours to determine if you want to see this person again.. "If I liked someone overall", How can you possibly like someone overall after meeting them for the first time? I do not assume the worst, I look, listen and observe. I knew what I liked and based on that I decided if this was a person I would want to see again. There are certain things that are instant deal breakers. I met one woman that talked constantly about how much see disliked her ex...deal breaker! Another person was looking at her phone constantly...deal breaker! Talking about going somewhere to "be alone" deal breaker! Of course even if you get to the point where you are interested she may not be.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 64
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 7:31:55 AM
Of course, there can be obvious dealbreakers. Such people misrepresenting themselves. But I'm talking about things that are gray areas and could happen because a person is somewhat nervous or shy on a first date / meeting. For example, I had a first date with a woman that tended to ramble when she is nervous. I decided to go out on another date with her. She was more relaxed on the next date and didn't ramble.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 65
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 7:56:00 AM
"Suppose a woman wanted until the 3rd date to have sex"


That's totally different IMO, and I'll explain why from MY pov ....


If she doesn't on the first date, it shows that she isn't so quick to jump in the sex with some guy she just met. It shows she requires more before allowing that to happen. It shows class and self respect.


If she doesn't on the second date, it shows she still needs to get to know the guy more and isn't doing it on the second date simply to show that she isn't a first date kind of gal.

For ME, the 3rd date or so is enough time to get to know someone enough to know if the vibe is right, etc AND shows she doesn't just sleep with any guy.


I know you'll probably disagree and I don't care. That's my opinion and there you go.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 66
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How many times have you gone out on a first date with a 0% chance of sex happening?
Posted: 6/3/2016 12:47:31 PM

"Thinking that a woman is a slut or a man is a player because they had sex on the first date / meeting is an assumption"

It can be a Very sound assumption, all the way to it being a Real bad assumption. Just because it's a first DATE doesn't mean that though.

So, is thinking Jordan Spieth could kick my butt if I played golf with him. It's an assumption , and a pretty safe one too.

Not just because it's a 1st Date, though. It can be a worse assumption than thinking some scenarios where two people technically had 3 dates.

Scenario 1: You've been friends with them for quite a while and knew each other quite well. After a long period of time, you started developing feelings for each other (well, more likely her; you were wanting her months ago), and then actually had a lengthy Date that certainly has no motif of a 1st even though it is one. And you two sleep together. This obviously doesn't indicate being a slut.

Scenario 2: You mingle with a girl at a place you and your friends went to, and you two hit it off talking for hours. She leaves with her delicious gal pals after you give her a nice kiss to say bye, and yes -- we'll have that (1st) Date. You go out on a Date on Saturday early afternoon, which ends up going to different places, to dinner, hanging with mutual friends around evening bar time, lasting until 2am -- all while hitting it off seen as an item -- and well, you do it like they do.

In Scenario 2, in order for that to be indicative of a 'slut', it would have to be assumed situations surrounding that happen Frequently. They don't.

Scenario 3: You exchange just a few messages online, and agree to meet. She works late, so you meet her for a drink after her work that night, around 10PM. You mingle until 12AM, go back to her place, and pork like crazy without knowing their last name. Yeah, one would assume he's a player and/or she's a slut. There's a chance that with one of them (namely girl) *actually* rarely does this and was Mesmorized by the guy -- all while she's on the rebound, etc -- but it's understandable people by default aren't going to assume that.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 67
its not pretty being easy
Posted: 6/3/2016 2:31:08 PM
Alas, all this talk about garden impliments, and yet by age 50, 80% of women might have HPV?

http://hpv.emedtv.com/hpv/hpv-statistics.html

Another reason us old goats should chase the young ladies--you old broads are just too dangerous :) Oh well, just pull on some erection protection for the deflection of infection, say a prayer, and...stay home and play with yourself anyway. Gosh, for the old days when doctors smoked cigarettes and sex was safe b/c no one had it.
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 68
its not pretty being easy
Posted: 6/3/2016 2:35:48 PM
I've gotta clear my throat, brb...
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 69
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 8:33:30 PM

I know you'll probably disagree and I don't care. That's my opinion and there you go.


Suit yourself. Speculate until your heart is content. But there is no guarantee a woman that had sex on the 3rd date with a man never had sex on the first or second date with another man.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 70
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 8:49:18 PM
^^^^^ True enough but I'd rather put my money on the 3rd or more date gal since none of us have a crystal ball in our back pocket
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 71
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/3/2016 8:53:52 PM
^ So, have you ever turned a woman down for sex on the first date? Told her you wanted to wait?

(Now I'm just being a silly goose.)
 professora
Joined: 7/28/2008
Msg: 72
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/4/2016 5:12:42 AM
gtomustang

You put it in plain understandable terms: a first date is like a test drive.

My first date recently did not like my use of the word close as in "I feel close to my family......" and before the sentence was finished he exploded with "Liar" ---- his preception of close is geographically close. My preception included email, skype, Facebook, phone etc.

We tried a second date & this man likes conflict and confrontation----test drive is over.

TEST Drive is a good example.
________________________________________________________________
Again: I wish POF would recognize the need for an over 65 age group for dating.
________________________________________________________________

HIV: I am a nurse. PLEASE have a blood HIV test or use protection. HIV is real and avoidable. the tests are fast and done for free. Within 20 minutes, the results can be read.
 ginghamgal
Joined: 2/13/2016
Msg: 73
How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/4/2016 7:45:26 AM
Even when a woman is open to having casual sex and/or sex on the first date, she can be still be very selective about whom and when to have it. Doesn't mean she does this often.
 runningroger
Joined: 1/3/2016
Msg: 74
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/6/2016 1:16:30 AM
Twice in the past couple of months I have had great first first dates. I thought we really connected. We spent 3 or 4 4 days texting each other for hours on end in a very flirtatious manner. Then I heard nothing ever again??
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 75
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How many times have you gone out on a first date that did not go further?
Posted: 6/6/2016 1:50:13 AM
ginghamgal
I dont think a woman who has sex with a virtual stranger on a first date is being selective in fact.
Not to say that she would do it often though. I think some women will have sex if they are horny and not really wanting to have any sort of serious relationship with the guy and perhaps not see him again. A one night stand....Most women I know would hold off with the early sex if they felt there was a chance of something more or they wanted to see if the relationship was going to develop.
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