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 halforhalfnot
Joined: 9/13/2016
Msg: 51
Dating killer turn offsPage 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
That's kind of interesting. I have a forum friend here and we sometimes compare the messages we get. I get nice messages from women; she gets "Wanna? " messages from guys.
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 52
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/3/2016 8:16:40 PM

What that really means is: her brother or her father are some of the only men who haven't tried every trick to get into her pants or talk trash about women.

This is the most general of generalizations. Forget talking trash, MEN will try every trick, because if you don't - you don't get into the pants - it's that simple. Some men only need a few tricks, some men try a dozen tricks and none of them work. Some men are one-trick ponies - I'm sure women mention this, too.

Most men who ask women on a date are out to get in their pants. A small percent have a goal related to money ( getting her money, her family's money, govt. money, access to valuables). Men who want to be friends with a woman don't ask them on dates - they just talk to them whenever they meet, or shoot the breeze on the phone - there's no pressure.

BB - you don't think any of your boyfriends tried EVERY trick? Maybe you weren't paying attention, or maybe you were in a peanut butter phase....???
 BlasphemousBombshell
Joined: 9/27/2016
Msg: 53
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/3/2016 10:54:16 PM
Of course they tried. I would bet nearly every woman here is not much different than me, hearing "just let me put the tip in" to "but ill get blue balls!". Its a joke among women: "we might fake an orgasm, but men will fake a whole damn relationship". That prevalent willingness to use deception, guilt trips, intimidation, etc wears on women after a while. Men see the sex game as women being some kind of greedy gate keepers, but if they were the ones who suffered pregnancy, if be more selective too.

This is common sense to women, and the fact that so few males tend to consider this is part of why many women get frustrated with men. My friends were always mystified in youth that guys would call them names for not wanting to screw and would mean while talk down on women who did, their refusal to grasp the gravity of a pregnancy risk comes off pathologically callous to the group who CAN get pregnant...
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 54
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/3/2016 11:59:59 PM

That prevalent willingness to use deception, guilt trips, intimidation, etc wears on women after a while. Men see the sex game as women being some kind of greedy gate keepers, but if they were the ones who suffered pregnancy, if be more selective too.

I doubt that will ever change - most men see a pregnancy as a GOOD outcome, as it proves both people were fertile.

Your concerns are justified, and NO - men are not going to suddenly be more concerned - it will always be your job to guard the gate. They understand your situation well - they just don't care that it's rough on you - and I know that's not what women want to hear.

Unfortunately, nothing can guarantee that - no ring, no law, no living arrangement or threats from family can guarantee that guy will stay. Certainly a heart-breaker....you're encouraged to use every trick in the book to protect yourself.

The mean-talk....I never understood that myself, and I've seen it. Really, women are everywhere - I just don't understand why a guy would be so P.O.'d about a single women he didn't score on - sheesh!
 InnerGorilla2
Joined: 8/1/2016
Msg: 55
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 9:03:34 AM

That prevalent willingness to use deception, guilt trips, intimidation, etc wears on women after a while. Men see the sex game as women being some kind of greedy gate keepers, but if they were the ones who suffered pregnancy, if be more selective too.


It goes both ways. Women that have these perceptions of men, end up following self fulfilling prophesies and attracting that type of men.

I personally love sex and when I dated I pursued physical contact from the first date on. If she said she was not interested. I simply pulled back and be done. I was not going to waste her time or mine. Lucky for me this allowed me to find women with a high libido, that were ALSO interested in pursuing a very physical and sexual relationship. It was also very clear that if we became intimate, it was not a guarantee of a long term relationship, but during the time we were together, it would be exclusive. Period.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 56
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 9:17:40 AM
I'll agree to that comparison with cops. Beautiful women get hit on often, and the strangers attempting a "Cold sale" are the ones with the guts, or the ones who don't care what she thinks. I asked out a lot of women when young, b/c my former cheerleader mom told me beautiful girls rarely got asked out, so don't be scared off by looks. She also taught me to take any no as an answer, so when the ladies would say, "thanks, but I have a bf", I never asked again. She said no, she must be intelligent enough to know what she wants. Perhaps, maybe, in some situations what she really meant was, "not now, let me get to know you". But I didn't want to be the "creepy guy who didn't get the hint", so who knows, maybe I lost a chance, maybe it never exists. Am I the rare guy? again, who knows. But there may be more "nice guys" out there who tried once and left.

I'll bet there are far more nice guys who didn't even try. I grew up during the sexual harassment revolution. We got taught every day to not bother a woman unless she gave express permission, signed and in writing. In college, one had to ask, "can I kiss you" then "can I touch you there" and so on, every step of the way. From this came the SNAG, the Sensitive New Age Guy who hung out with the sexually confused woman. He'd declare he wasn't out to use her like all the losers she slept with, but in reality he was just waiting his turn, thinking she must be easy.

There are women who willingly date the jerks, b/c honestly....they're jerks themselves. They're the girl who ditches female friends to chase a boy, then come back months later with, "wow, I miss you guys, we're going to get together and have a great time!" until they meet the next jerk and disappear again. Or they're the girls who know they are hot and take opportunities where they can and use people...which is why the player doesn't stand out as a red flag. Like a cop, they've chosen a lifestyle to be around the worst, while feeling like a hotshot.
 JS3344
Joined: 2/12/2013
Msg: 57
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 10:42:57 AM

This is the most general of generalizations. Forget talking trash, MEN will try every trick, because if you don't - you don't get into the pants - it's that simple. Some men only need a few tricks, some men try a dozen tricks and none of them work. Some men are one-trick ponies - I'm sure women mention this, too.
- really? I can't say I ever had to trick anyone to anything they didn't want to do........maybe in poker though.


Most men who ask women on a date are out to get in their pants. A small percent have a goal related to money ( getting her money, her family's money, govt. money, access to valuables). Men who want to be friends with a woman don't ask them on dates - they just talk to them whenever they meet, or shoot the breeze on the phone - there's no pressure.
- really? Have to disagree on this one, I actually like women.......I've actually been in relationships with women, where we were friends and had sex and did everything together....freaky huh?
 BlasphemousBombshell
Joined: 9/27/2016
Msg: 58
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 10:52:49 AM

These days, most often it is the older cops that remember what a police officer is supposed to be doing that are more likely to treat regular people like human beings. It's the younger cops with their new gear and armor like they're Army Rangers that have been taught to shoot first and destroy any evidence.


Awesome point! Its applicable to dating too. I read the young ones are far less likely to have seen life long comittments or make them.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 59
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 4:11:47 PM
Just to chew on:

https://www.buzzfeed.com/maryanngeorgantopoulos/age-of-police-officers-who-kill-people-a-little-discussed-fa?utm_term=.sxPnBwrMr#.aprgpDx7x

There are plenty of business fields where the FNG comes in, ready to make an instant name for himself, or wants to jump seniority to get the corner office. The older, more experienced coworkers know what situations need care, and what situations need attention, and what situations can be...overlooked. However they just don't carry guns. Also, a cop with seniority may work the day shift, while the new cop stuck with the graveyard shift might deal with, let's say, Joe Average who's at home asleep.

I'm sure this is going to throw the thread off on a tangent :)

back to the subject--a young man, generally, isn't looking for a long term anything. His attention span is short on most subjects--what cars are cool, what cellphones are in fashion, what's the latest routine at the gym, what music is most awesome, etc. His biology isn't in his favor :) Not to mention, an 18 yr old can't wax poetic about music he's enjoyed for the last two decades.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 60
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 4:42:19 PM
Interesting points made. In my own case, I was taught to respect others space. Regardless of sex. So approaching women aggressively goes against what I learned. A few of my female friends don't know why I'm like this. Two asked me, yet they never went so far as to put up a few of their friends in front of me. I'm guessing that they just assumed that I wasn't interested, or overly particular about whom I'd choose. In any event, all I know is that no one ever set me up to meet them. Or they did, and they failed to tell me what they had done.
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 61
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/4/2016 11:39:17 PM

What that really means is: her brother or her father are some of the only men who haven't tried every trick to get into her pants or talk trash about women.


How exactly does a man "trick" a woman into having intercourse?
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 62
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/5/2016 9:05:51 AM
Question posed by Coma_White:


How exactly does a man "trick" a woman into having intercourse?


Women are going to answer:



He tells her he loves her, when it fact he doesn’t even know her well.



He tells her she’s beautiful, the moonlight gleaming in her hair makes his heart skip a beat, he can’t wait to see her again, she is everything he’s ever looked for or wanted in a woman, his life isn’t complete without her, ….


And of course, the perennial favorite:


Yes, I’ll still respect you in the morning
 Whisky_River
Joined: 12/2/2015
Msg: 63
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/5/2016 10:45:31 AM
^^^^^^^Right!
I may have fallen for those silly lines when I was young and naive.
News flash for some of you ole' guys...women like sex too and don't need to have an excuse to reciprocate or blame anyone.
A few of us are just choosier than others....
Some of you should try it...so powerful to not be so needy.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 64
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/5/2016 4:39:04 PM
Its true, women like sex with attractive partners too. Some of us guys are used to the younger days, when a woman was worried what others might think, and have plenty of excuses. We forget that as the ladies get older, they like us worry less about what people think and have more opportunities to do what they want, now that they've moved out of Daddy's viewing range.

its extremely powerful to not be so needy. Whether its looks or money. Being in control is a wonderful thing.
 aintnodeal
Joined: 4/10/2016
Msg: 65
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/5/2016 6:41:22 PM

Yes, I’ll still respect you in the morning

Never said anything of the sort - I took the opposite approach - I promised ZERO and always delivered on that. Somehow, I still met some chicks who just wanted it anyway. Never had a desire to do the family/kids/house/dog thing...avoided it forever, and glad I did.

Some of us are just goofs....
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 66
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/5/2016 10:17:19 PM

I may have fallen for those silly lines when I was young and naive.
News flash for some of you ole' guys...women like sex too and don't need to have an excuse to reciprocate or blame anyone.
A few of us are just choosier than others....
Some of you should try it...so powerful to not be so needy.


The whole "men trick women into sleeping with them" has been debunked a long time ago.
Sure, some men lie, and so do some women. Some people lie about what they want. Some people also lie about what they had for breakfast or how much their car cost. So what? It's not headline news that some people are idiots. People should get to know someone a bit if they're afraid of falling into that trap. Plus, feelings change and people are allowed to change their minds about their partners. Just because they were into someone at first doesn't guarantee that they'll be into them next week.
 InnerGorilla2
Joined: 8/1/2016
Msg: 67
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/6/2016 6:44:58 AM

The whole "men trick women into sleeping with them" has been debunked a long time ago.


There's this big illusion that has been perpetrated by societal norms for hundreds of years and that is that men seduce women. That is the biggest lie it exist. Women are the keepers of the gate. And unless men force themselves into women, which is called rape, women can at some point pull the plug.
There are of course many women that grow up to behave like victims. That is what they learned from their parents or communities where they lived. So they live that narrative of "he seduced me" or "he guilt me into having sex with him." Yes, these things do happen and happen a lot. And perhaps these women don't put a stop to that because that is the only thing they know. That is the way they thing ALL men are.

Part of the problem I think it is the double standard that exist. Men that sleep around are considered studs, women that sleep around are considered sluts and whores. Yet both men an women want and like sex about the same.

When I was dating I went after that one percent of women that were hot, attractive and they knew it. Telling them that they were gorgeous or beautiful was a waste of my time or their time. Buying them a drink was the same waste of time. The key was to turn things around to they did the chasing, they offered to pay for some of the drinks, and they offered to come to their house for a drink. There's an art to that, and it's not about seduction, but communication and simply responding to the signals that women are constantly giving.
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 68
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/6/2016 12:35:04 PM

There's this big illusion that has been perpetrated by societal norms for hundreds of years and that is that men seduce women. That is the biggest lie it exist. Women are the keepers of the gate. And unless men force themselves into women, which is called rape, women can at some point pull the plug.
There are of course many women that grow up to behave like victims. That is what they learned from their parents or communities where they lived. So they live that narrative of "he seduced me" or "he guilt me into having sex with him." Yes, these things do happen and happen a lot. And perhaps these women don't put a stop to that because that is the only thing they know. That is the way they thing ALL men are.


Exactly. It's unbelievable that people still try to pass off that baloney about men "tricking" women as truth. You can't be tricked into doing something you want to do. A guy isn't obligated to stay with a woman just because she spent the night. When two people barely know each other, there's a huge chance for compatibility issues.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 69
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/6/2016 1:42:19 PM
I think most of us know that women seduce men just as often as men do. There is no illusion there. In my experience men do try to force themselves on women or at least co-erce and rape is often not reported. Some men do not take no for an answer. OR the women simply give in out of fear, or to please the guy and get him off her back. If women feel guilty about being sexual and having uncommitted sex when they want it, it is because of the way society views women and their sexuality. At the heart of it is the pregnancy issue of course and that men want to know that any child they are supporting, is theirs.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 70
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/6/2016 2:31:24 PM

How exactly does a man "trick" a woman into having intercourse?

A simple Google search of this ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^gave me 3 options to read. I didn't need to read to know the answer, LOL


A Simple Trick To Get a Girl To Think About Having Sex With You ...
www.tsbmag.com › Dating
Jun 4, 2014 - Can You Trick a Woman Into Sex? Guys sometimes seem to follow a script when they are trying to seduce a ... The questions is: how do you do this? ... Exactly what kind of humor you use depends on your feel of the situation.

How to Trick a Woman Into Bed | The Vagenda
vagendamagazine.com/2012/09/how-to-trick-a-woman-into-bed/
Sep 28, 2012 - You know those guys that you see in bars, the ones who would drag your limp, ... in the art of tricking women into bed – and on the first date nonetheless. ... it does not take a study to prove that booze is the single man's best friend. ... Having spent the night with a male friend I can confirm that I asked him ...

What's the best way to trick a man or a woman into having sex with you ...
https://www.quora.com/Whats-the-best-way-to-trick-a-man-or-a-woman-into-h...
Quora
Jun 1, 2015 - I believe historically the most common trick for men was to pretend to be much richer ... Since woman makes man, does man have an inferiority complex toward woman? In what way woman are helpful to their man? What is the

You asked!

"....................................her brother or her father are some of the only men who haven't tried every trick to get into her pants or talk trash about women."

If only it were that simple, for all women. Not hardly.
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 71
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Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/6/2016 2:53:59 PM

A simple Google search of this ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^gave me 3 options to read. I didn't need to read to know the answer, LOL


Google also told me that Hillary Clinton is a shape shifting repitilian. Who would have known eh?
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 72
Dating killer jerk offs
Posted: 10/7/2016 7:54:54 AM
"Booze is the answer, anyone still remember the question" as the T shirt used to proclaim....except I've seen women twice pull the reverse trick, "hey, I never agreed to that, I'm going to the cops!" so I never wasted time on wasted women. Still, I guess it explains why bars used to have "Ladies Night" where the lasses got free passes.

Young girls worry about what people think, so at least out where I grew up, they wanted a "blame" to avoid the "Slut" label. We fellows get used to a few years of that, we forget that women grow up, mature, and sometimes see sex as a healthy thing (maybe b/c our "Stuck back in the '50's" Moms never came to that conclusion, or maybe our pre BC pill parents were worried about becoming grandparents too soon :) ).
 InnerGorilla2
Joined: 8/1/2016
Msg: 73
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/7/2016 12:30:53 PM

in the art of tricking women into bed – and on the first date nonetheless. ... it does not take a study to prove that booze is the single man's best friend. ... Having spent the night with a male friend I can confirm that I asked him ...


If this worked all the time, and with average and below average looking guys there would not even be internet dating. The guys who pick up the girl at the bar are usually very good at that. The rest of the guys aren't so lucky.
 halforhalfnot
Joined: 9/13/2016
Msg: 74
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/7/2016 4:26:42 PM
Most women learn about that trick the hard way when they're still girls. I doubt that it succeeds very often.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 75
Dating killer turn offs
Posted: 10/7/2016 5:28:40 PM
You most girls Halfie?
Jason Momoa could trick me into bed. Today we played what if he did " fill in the blank" in bed
It was when the goth girl said " what if he pooped in bed?" I was like wth.. who has she dated. He could by the way
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