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 HanoverFella
Joined: 1/16/2018
Msg: 351
Prejudice versus short men online dating.Page 15 of 17    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17)

I will absolutely never understand anyone that uses "height" as a requirement for dating!!


Meh..I’m about 5’9 and I wouldn’t really want a woman taller than me, especially over 6 feet!
We prefer what prefer, all the forum whining and posts in the world won’t change our minds.
 2ufo
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 352
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 1:47:05 PM
^^^
But it's so entertaining (insert droll sarcasm) to watch yet another person commence a whinefest.

There's always the possibility that it will evolve into an interesting debate...
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 353
Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 4:43:33 PM
Many short men can find a good woman to date. The whiny ones may need an attitude adjustment first. If he has enough other attributes, he can absolutely find a woman. Other attributes a man has which may even the playing field (these things I just stole from a Google search result for "20 Things Women Want in a Man":

Looks
Money
Good Career/Education (Earning Potential)
Prestige
Intelligence
Attitude/Personality
Sense of Style
Strength & Stamina (Muscular Build & the Ability to be a Protector)
Home Ownership
Penis Size
Good Reputation (including no criminal record)
Good with Children
Being Good in Bed
Romantic/Passionate
Sense of Humour
Kindness
Confidence
Moral Integrity/Dependability/Faithfulness
Good smell/hygiene
Masculinity

Some things of course you can't get if you aren't born with them but other things yes you definitely can.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 354
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 4:57:27 PM
Damn....once again I am sooo not like these women that get polled!!

Looks....beauty is in the eye of the beholder....I find the more I get to know a man, the more (or less) attractive he becomes!!
Money....I got my own....just have a job or income of some sort to support yourself
Good Career/Education (Earning Potential)....once again....just be able to support yourself....don't care if it's working on the trash truck!
Prestige.....pfffft!
Intelligence.....there are so many varying degrees of intelligence....just be able to hold a decent conversation and balance your checkbook!
Strength & Stamina (Protector)....uhm....protect me from what?? and stamina....just in the bedroom!!
Penis Size....every woman has their own preference...some like 'em big, some like 'em average...so I guess size matters here!
Good Reputation (no criminal record).....depends on the type of criminal behavior and when it occurred.
 afinewineandyou
Joined: 12/1/2017
Msg: 355
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 6:11:57 PM

Maybe he treats her well." Being treated well & treating your partner well are more important than looks and height


+1000
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 356
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 6:24:20 PM
https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a19535604/top-20-traits-she-wants/

Apr 17, 2018
This list of "top 20 traits she wants" in a man, in this most recent article DOES not agree with the list provided above, on this page.

 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 357
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/1/2018 7:08:50 PM
not all women want a tall man, but most want them to be taller than they.... If the man is broad then I dont care if he is around 5'8" but not shorter... And yes we want what we want and no amount of height or weight shaming will change that.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 358
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 2:04:37 AM


Maybe he treats her well." Being treated well & treating your partner well are more important than looks and height
+1000

Yeah, but if doesn't have sufficient looks (or height; a subset of Looks) -- he's not going to be her "partner" let alone getting past maybe a sympathy-date. :) It's an even swifter deal-breaker.

Sally: "Bob, (sob), I finally broke up with Jim. He never treated me that well, and I finally couldn't take it...."

Bob: "Awww, that sucks. You're such a great gal, I agree, you deserve better. I have to ask, though. Why wouldn't you ever go out with me? I'm certainly no jerk."

Sally: "Seriously? Because you're 5'7", more than chubby, and it's not like your face makes up for anything."

Bob: "Oh. Wow. Okay..."

Sally: "I'm sorry, Bob. I misspoke. I meant to say -- I just didn't feel a connection. ... Which reminds me. My friend Barb. She's really NICE. You should meet her..."

Apr 17, 2018
This list of "top 20 traits she wants" in a man, in this most recent article DOES not agree with the list provided above, on this page.

Yeah, but, that's what women Say. And although I like that magazine, you'll always find articles conflicting (as with different places VS others). What women are Actually Attracted to when single is different than what they want Ideally in a Relationship with a BF.

not all women want a tall man, but most want them to be taller than they.... If the man is broad then I dont care if he is around 5'8" but not shorter...

So basically, you don't necessarily need a tall guy -- but you do need him not to be short. IMO, I think that's the typical mindset of a typical gal around average female height, or socially-connected+pretty and pretty short. That aside, if one truly doesn't care if a guy's 5'8", it's hard to believe it'd be the no-excuses "cut off" at the same time. "Sorry Frank, you're 5'7". You got a nice face and are in reasonably decent shape -- but beat it. I got barely-average Joe over here at 5'8"!" ;)
 BLONDE_ANGEL_1
Joined: 4/27/2018
Msg: 359
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 4:54:11 AM
^^
My whole life I've heard men (including those who were avg. to less than) yak ad nauseum about women & their looks.

"She's a 10"

"DDG"

"I like a big rack"

"pretty blue eyes"

"a sexy 7"

bla bla bla

what about looking at a woman & observing her intrinsic qualities? morals, characters, intellect, political stance, etc?

But when the tables get turned & men start getting treated the way they have treated women, oh, the audacity of it?

I see plenty of short men everywhere w/ women, all types of short men, some rich some poor some thin some fat some handsome some not so much & they are w/ a variety of women as well.

Who knows WHY people really partner up.

I think some people use their LOOKS AS AN EXCUSE to avoid commitment. God forbid if they have to answer to someone or make an effort.

My husband is over a foot taller than me. His late wife was even shorter than me. It's the type he liked & pursued. Had I been pursued by a shorter man first, maybe I would be married to a man that is 5ft 5.

I am confident enough in myself as a woman to be w/ a man who is 5ft4 or 6ft4, I don't need a tall man to "elevate my status" bec. I am secure in myself.

Shoot, even Billy Joel got Christy Brinkley (even tho it lasted for less than forever) WHY? Bec. he was confident & successful, & not whining & fearful to approach her.

PS_ I agree w/ Ms. Micki, I think we have the same ideas in many respects.
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 360
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 9:38:11 AM

We prefer what prefer, all the forum whining and posts in the world won’t change our minds.


That's true. Some people also prefer younger or older partners. Your logic needs to apply there, as well.
 siisaa
Joined: 8/6/2017
Msg: 361
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 12:01:07 PM

I see plenty of short men everywhere w/ women, all types of short men, some rich some poor some thin some fat some handsome some not so much & they are w/ a variety of women as well.


Same. Short men have a better chance at dating women he already knows rather than online strangers. All the women see is a pairing of numbers and he gets the boot. There is a world of dating/meeting/mating OFFLINE. Complaining about it online isn't going to better your chances. Develop some interpersonal skills, learn to speak confidently, play to your strengths and maybe you'll attract some women in the real world.

I once dated a man who was 5'3" (shorter than me). We met in a Spanish class at my then-local community college. He was worldly, confident, charismatic, well-dressed and charming. His face was average in looks but if he had just cold-messaged me on a dating site, I probably would have passed him by. I got to know him in and outside of that class beyond his face and stature.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 362
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 12:09:14 PM
I don't think I pay attention to most things anymore.
Just be ****ing nice...have a little patience, smile a
little more, **** a little less, don't have any stalkers
and we'll probably get along.

Must like pets though. Maybe not cats or snakes.
Don't drive like a looney tune, stop for lemonade
stands and don't ask for your change back.

You can be short or tall.
Being tall doesn't guarantee you won't be a small person.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 363
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/2/2018 12:38:52 PM
I can honestly say when I was online dating...I paid absolutely no attention to their height!!

My husband was tall...6'3"
My last partner was 5'6" and my current is 5'6"....I am 5"5".

When it comes to dancing, kissing and bedroom activities...I will have to say I prefer the shorter versions!

Once again...I will stick with personality/attitude as my defining factor.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 364
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/2/2018 2:51:38 PM
I was going to type a long post, but i'll try to keep it short.

ever since Cleopatra rubbed ash around her eyes to seduce the Roman prez, we've viewed women on the strength of their looks, and men on the strength of their...strengths. I don't know how many youtube vids are of men running around in bathing suits, but admittedly I don't watch Lexi Bell roller skate in pigtails to "spirit in the sky" on youtube and wonder about her ability to pay my bills. I guess guys wouldn't mind being judged about their ponytail or how they look after their diet, but height they feel is something they can't fix easily. For every couple I see that doesn't make "physical-appearance sense", I see plenty more that make biological sense. And as pointed out, Christie Brinkley/Billy Joel and Billy Bob Thorton/Angela Jolie marriages don't seem to last as long as the people they do end up with.

of course, if a guy is just lookin' to procreate...he just needs that one woman with great genes for his offspring. but if he wants all the benefits of good looks (better at sales, more attention from strangers, etc etc) and to feel that he can attract more than one woman in his life...then he pays too much attention to the rejection he gets. He doesn't like getting the short end of the stick.

I know some women out there actually do put personality over looks. but trust me, they are rare, I've been searching for them all :) as the ladies have pointed out, an un-photogenic fellow will have better luck with the people he knows. they will see him for his personality. and then, size won't matter.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 365
hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/2/2018 10:27:16 PM
A major problem with POF is that we judge looks or personality before even meeting someone in person. I wish we could post videos to our profile. Might give a person a better idea of whether we could be attracted to someone before disqualifying them.
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 366
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 2:48:11 AM
A major problem with POF is that we judge looks or personality before even meeting someone in person. I wish we could post videos to our profile. Might give a person a better idea of whether we could be attracted to someone before disqualifying them.

You can put youtube links in your profile here i think? If so just make a video and put it on there, with link only settings if you like, and then have it on your profile that way?
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 367
hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 5:34:41 AM
I would only put a video if I saw other people's videos too. Just like photos. I hate it when people can see me but I can't see them.
hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 7:06:35 AM

I know some women out there actually do put personality over looks. but trust me, they are rare,

I remember when you had a photo up. I thought you were very attractive, I also like smart men so that makes you even more attractive to me. Why must you live so far away? I'd take you out to dinner and even pay, with a coupon mind you, but i'm cheap like that.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 369
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 7:32:42 AM
why thank you :) Lucky you live in another country. But I'm sure there are smart men like myself up there, too. I can say from experience..the people who value intelligence the most, have it themselves. Its hard to judge something we don't have personal experience with.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 370
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 8:23:09 AM
Usually, for the woman to be interested, the man usually has to meet or exceed her physical attraction bar.
 siisaa
Joined: 8/6/2017
Msg: 371
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/3/2018 10:03:11 AM

A major problem with POF is that we judge looks or personality before even meeting someone in person.


That's not exclusive to POF though. People who may be "lacking" in the looks/height/weight department need to develop other traits and skills that would render them viable & desirable candidates in the real world. Online dating is not going to work in their favor because it is so focused on the exterior. They need to try other avenues if they're serious about finding a partner.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 372
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/3/2018 11:14:17 AM

Short men have a better chance at dating women he already knows rather than online strangers.

Sorry - just felt I had to rip on Captain Obvious for this little nugget. EVERYBODY has better luck with people they have real life connections with - aside from maybe prisoners on Death Row.

They need to try other avenues if they're serious about finding a partner.

Couldn't the same be said of ALL the chronically single people in here? There's plenty of attractive people that are "statistically" perfect that still can't make something last and are recycling their six year old photos in here again for the fourteenth time.

1) It is true there are indeed plenty of lazy or single-minded people who use online dating and expect it to work the first time, and then gripe about it. Millenials come to mind.

2) But it is ALSO true there are people trying all kinds of avenues for meeting people, and haven't had success. Online dating for some time was considered a last resort, not the first place to start looking. Assuming the first conclusion in here is not always the correct one.

3) 'Trying' other avenues is pretty much what this forum is all about. People inquire within about their POF experiences and seek to find better results. What's so amazing is how people with even a moderate crumb of what they consider success come in here and insist they know what they are doing, or refuse to change part of what they think made POF work for them. A lot of connections in here are dumb luck. I'm no genius matchmaker by any means, but I look at logic and statistics and realize people use these online tools to search for fantasies that match their vanity, not their true lives. Trying another 'avenue' can mean joining a church, or a Meetup group, or another dating site - but it can also mean to STOP limiting your online searches by a freaking number or mile post.

Matching online is superficial. End of story. There IS something seriously skewed with playing the numbers game in online dating. Pretending that character or a moral compass or compatibility can be found in a list of statistics or a few sentences of a profile is wishful thinking at best. What people need to stop doing is telling people to go away and look elsewhere because they don't want to hear their whining anymore. You tell that to a bunch of black people after a kid got shot, and they gather enough numbers to block a busy freeway with their protests. I'm not saying there's going to be a bunch of Danny DeVito types fouling up traffic any time soon, but dismissing others for being ignored when you may very well be the people ignoring them is hypocrisy at its best.
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 373
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Prejudice versus short men online dating.
Posted: 5/3/2018 12:41:38 PM
siisaa:
My response to those "puzzling" couples is always, "Maybe he treats her well".
My response is similar: "Maybe he treat$ her well."

Angel wrote:
Shoot, even Billy Joel got Christy Brinkley (even tho it lasted for less than forever) WHY? Bec. he was confident & successful, & not whining & fearful to approach her.
And because he was a world famous celeb. With celebs, throw everything else out the window far as I'm concerned. Being uber rich dude, especially rich AND famous, overwhelms the other "attractiveness" variables. Being rich and/or famous, as a male, precluded Billy Joel from ever having to "whine" or "be fearful" about approaching ANY woman. Now...before he became a ..um....big shot.....maybe he was whiny and fearful with women....but even if he wasn't ...doubt he would have ever had ..... any chance with Christy at all..

Angel wrote:
My whole life I've heard men (including those who were avg. to less than) yak ad nauseum about women & their looks.

"She's a 10"

"DDG"

"I like a big rack"

"pretty blue eyes"

"a sexy 7"

bla bla bla

what about looking at a woman & observing her intrinsic qualities? morals, characters, intellect, political stance, etc?

But when the tables get turned & men start getting treated the way they have treated women, oh, the audacity of it?
Fair point, but a woman can't be filtered out, like sludge, based on the attributes you illustrate here. Unlike height. The closest for women, I imagine, would be body type...but that can be vague. I think that's the main aspect of some of the short mens' complaints about OLD.

I guess if we had fields like "YUGE rack, big rack, just a handful rack, small rack, flat as a pancake," ...or "1-3, 4-7, 8-9....and "Perfect 10"......or "bla," bla bla," "bla bla bla" ....then these attributes may be the equivalent to the significance of height - to a man in OLD?

Danimal:
I'm not saying there's going to be a bunch of Danny DeVito types fouling up traffic any time soon,
Last thing we need is yet another aggrieved group protest movement. "Short Lives Matter," perhaps? Protesting, blocking traffic, wearing Randy Newman LP covers on their head maybe.

Danimal:
but dismissing others for being ignored when you may very well be the people ignoring them is hypocrisy at its best.
They may be ignoring you online...but I think their point is....if they met you IRL and got to know you maybe they'd give you a chance. That's the way I read the previous few comments by the wimminsfolk.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 374
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 1:05:53 PM

A major problem with POF is that we judge looks or personality before even meeting someone in person.


Technically, that's not a problem with POF, but rather most of the people using POF.

People can make better decisions if they make the effort.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 375
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hey, don't get short with us :)
Posted: 5/3/2018 7:16:39 PM
I think the only prejudice is that women can put their physical requirements for a man in their profile and still receive messages. If a man says he only dates women under a certain weight or women with doubles Ds, how many messages do you think he’s gonna get?
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