Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 young_55
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 63
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?Page 2 of 44    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
Exactly. This isn't just a dating site. Its a public forum. How is it cheating to post to a forum?!

If he wanted to hide from you...believe me, he would.

The fact that you found his profile so easily when he could have cloaked it under any picture and profile info shows he wasn't too concerned about being seen.

Just being here posting to a forum is in itself harmless. I don't get how your "shopping for options" by responding to someone's thread. Maybe he's bored or doesn't have a lot of social time and this is it for him. Maybe he didn't tell ya about it, because it didn't really occur to him that he had to report his every little doing to Colenol Girlfriend.

If your that insecure you need to communicate with him and maybe move on to another guy. I don't see the harm in chatting on here in a forum. Big deal. Some people DO come here to simply talk on forums. And its possible he will come into contact with other female humans in the real world too. How is that different? So if he goes to the grocery store or to work and speaks to a female he's "shopping for options" there too? Gimme a break. Way to insecure...

Besides as has been pointed out. I see your here too.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 64
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/8/2006 5:34:21 AM
I agree with young55. While maybe on the surface it may appear to be suspicious, there ARE forums here. And people who ARE just looking for friends. It's MUCH easier to assume and jump to conclusions than to consider all aspects and actually ASK someone. There ARE people of the opposite sex all over and people who are determined to cheat are going to find a way. Some of us are just friendly people and enjoy meeting people and having interesting conversations. It's ridiculous to think that those who are involved would NEVER talk to a member of the opposite sex again. On the other extreme, sure there are those who are gonna say they're only here for the forums and may be sending out emails trying to hit on women, there are married people who are blatantly looking for someone to cheat with. But that behavior is going to happen, whether it's HERE, a bar, the workplace or even at church.
 cindylouwho1
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 65
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/10/2006 4:06:22 AM
well what I don't get is why people don't like it when you keep an old thread alive or if you start up new threads on the same subject.

Ok what are you supposed to do then? lol
 cindylouwho1
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 66
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/10/2006 8:23:49 AM
its a free country. Why exactly is he not allowed to go online and chat on the forums? You his keeper or something?
 young_55
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 68
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 2/10/2006 11:02:52 AM
stop generalizing every person of a single gender based on one person's bad experience with a single member of that gender.

Thats like getting mugged by an Asian and then generalizing 3 billion people based on that one guy's actions against you.
 nycdoctor
Joined: 8/2/2005
Msg: 72
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/13/2006 10:05:10 AM
I can understand why a guy who is in arelationship is still active on a dating site....maybe that his girlfriend isn't commited enough. Maybe in the beginning of the relationship he did took himself off the site, but when he realize that she wasn't into him as much as he was into her....or that he feel like a used car salesperson...try to get her to spend more time. In the back of his mind....she might leave him any minute....but since he is so inlove with her...he can't just leave her
 casunshine20003
Joined: 2/21/2006
Msg: 74
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/13/2006 4:10:01 PM
This Happend to me...sooo..I created a profile under a different name. picture, ect. . Emailed him and he wanted to meet "me". A little childish? Perhaps but...it he answered my question of why he had his profile on there.....to meet other women.
 Loverboy5
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 83
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/17/2006 7:51:36 PM
Thse stupid sites are addictive. People get involve but keep searching for better. No one should take this serious. Those who do look for trouble.
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 86
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/18/2006 4:47:36 PM
It's a situational thing. My man and I are both still here. We're active in the forums and still have many friends here that we write to. I'm not looking to make new men friends, but if I do I tell my sweetie about it. I also make sure they know I'm involved and it's friendship only. Usually they just want help with their profile or some advice. As long as you're upfront with your partner about what you're doing, it can be something that has no derogatory affect on your relationship. If it were creating a problem, I'd have no qualms about taking my profile down. It wouldn't be a matter of me having to think about it, my relationship is much more important and I wouldn't jeopardize it for anything. Our friendships here are very important to us, but we could continue to stay in touch. It's just a matter of communicating and having an understanding. And of course 100% faith and trust in the other person.
 dearly
Joined: 2/10/2005
Msg: 87
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/18/2006 5:04:05 PM
he is still looking and obviously not serious about your relationship. my guess he will cheat on you if the opportunity exists. don't trust him . confront him he may lie . obviously he is a cheater. dump him now .dearly
 tigerbebe
Joined: 3/17/2006
Msg: 88
view profile
History
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/18/2006 5:26:05 PM
There is a man on this site, that I met thru another one. We had started to see each other, and I thought we were getting along great. Then I find out he is writing to other women asking if they could meet and that he was single and not seeing anyone. One of the women he happened to contact was my best friend. She confronted him about what he was doing and he gave ME proper hell. Who the hell did she think she was telling him off like that. He twisted it all around and made out it was my fault for him being an a$$hole.
Some men, eh? Thank goodness not all like that.
 wahya
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 98
view profile
History
 bluejia
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 103
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:54:46 PM
I think it is a trust issue. If you really like that person, give him/her some trust. A lot of the times, the reason you question if your partner is cheating on you, keeping his/her options open or doing stuff behind your back, is because you are doing the same thing, or you have done it before. Otherwise, why would you be concerned? What goes around comes around. Internet does has its disadvantage, so does real life.
 will_nevergiveup
Joined: 1/10/2006
Msg: 106
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/26/2006 10:23:21 PM
I have mixed emotions about finding a person active out here while having an ongoing relationship with a person. A lot to consider. Is his profile changed to "chat only" or is there a disclaimer on his profile saying he's involved? Chances are... if he's still actively looking and he's confronted with this newfound information, he'll just change his nic and continue what he's doing.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 107
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/27/2006 10:09:27 PM
Hmmmm....that is a tough question. I wonder if being here in forums would be considered "keeping options open" ???? I have often wondered about this topic. I have been in on line sites for over 5 years. For me, it is purely social. Although I have met people from on line sites, I have made many friends, but only one love connection. Very perplexing. I wonder if I "kept my options open" ?????????? Great topic, something to spend countless hours analyzing, only to discover, I'll be back here tomorrow, lurking around again. HMMMM!!!
 tigerbebe
Joined: 3/17/2006
Msg: 108
view profile
History
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/28/2006 8:53:16 PM
Sweet Virginia,
It was a twist of fate, because he didnt even know of my best friend. I just went in and did a username search, and he has taken his profile down. Guess he read what I wrote about him in the forum, "Watch out Ladies". ,
I know it was ****y of me, but he is an a$$hole.
 marshw
Joined: 8/9/2005
Msg: 109
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/28/2006 9:56:29 PM
If a guy doesn't come right out and say: "We are in an exclusive realtionship." Then you're not! You are operating on assumptions that place you in fantasy land. How old are you? Women usually learn this by the time they are 25. If he doesn't say it, it aint so.
 PuffyDee
Joined: 11/8/2005
Msg: 110
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 3/29/2006 1:49:09 AM
i wont trust him if he is in a relationship and is active in dating site.

just tell him how you feel. if he doesnt care much abt how insecure u are, hmm make him feel insecure too...kidding >:P
 bluejia
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 118
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/15/2006 2:12:32 AM
It only means they still shop around and keep their options open. So it's not fair for the other person. I totally agrees with what Funnyface4u said, if a person keeps coming back to a dating website while he is in a relationship, how could you feel secure? How do you trust him? Although you can confront him, but what stupid guy will tell you the truth that he is shopping around? Of course he will deny.... It's hard to know what's the fact, and what is the assumption. But you can always make your own decision, whether you want to stand for urself or tolerate.
 captnjimbo
Joined: 2/11/2006
Msg: 120
view profile
History
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/15/2006 5:41:37 AM
According to what you said in your question, To just stop talking, (communicating), is a sign and form of abuse. Is this who you are? Now the question is why did you pick a guy who is also porbably an abuser? Now, do you want this guy in your life? He has already proven that he is not to be trusted. Is this personality type attractive to you? When You can answer these questions for yourself, you will know the answer. Now another question , are you a JC-(jerk chaser)? Jerks are by nature abusers. Abusers are attractive to abusers. Abuse is always a two -way street. Physical, mental, emotional, and sexual are still abuse and detremental to a person and their self esteen. What do you want for yourself? What will you put up with? What will you accept? How high do you hold your self up to your model of selfrespect? The best of luck to you..I wish you well!
 jacktraven
Joined: 3/28/2006
Msg: 121
view profile
History
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/15/2006 5:52:58 AM
He can do as he wishes, I do not seek to exert control over him. He's a mature intelligent man I trust him to make good decisions

Keyword: CONTROL

I'm the kind of man that thinks if you're secure about your partner, why worry about it. And this is important, the "policeman/woman" syndrome. Its very uncomfortable to feel paranoid. If you're out there checking your partner's every move, then you have no trust. If you're truly in love with someone, he/she will have your attention at all times, you will not look to the sides. Have you felt that??


our profiles are blantantly CLEAR that we're hooked up

Read the damn profiles!!!

POF has a difference compared to other dating sites: It has the forums. Being on this site doesn't mean you're "keeping your options open". In my case, I'm here for them, its amazing what you can learn and also contribute.

Speaking of learning and stuff, what's OP??
 bluejia
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 122
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/15/2006 11:11:21 AM

If you're truly in love with someone, he/she will have your attention at all times, you will not look to the sides.


Yeah, you might give him all the attention, and won't keep looking, but the person you are with are not fullly devoted to you? Why would you put up with it if you can find somebody else who can give you all his heart?

And i don't think it's about security any more. Yeah, you give him all the trust, but the thing is he abuses your trust, so do you still want to give him the trust and let him abuse it more?
 bluejia
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 123
What do you think of a guy who is in a relationship and is still active on a dating site?
Posted: 4/15/2006 11:15:53 AM

if anyone has become friends from the website personal email addresses have already been exchanged so it is not necessary to visit at the website


It depends on how u look at it. Yeah, he can get off the website, but he may have already exchanged numbers with 5 or maybe 10 other girls that he considered as options, and talk to them on the phone. Yeah, you could call them "friends" cuz he talks to them on the phone and stuff, but only he knows who they really are.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >