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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > How do you know when a women is flirting with you?      Home login  
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 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 26
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humping your leg is sometimes a good signPage 2 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
GTO wrote:

I remember being on a plane decades ago next to a twenty something who asked for a favor from the stewardess, and he must have been hot looking b/c before he knew it she was bringing back from first class dinners for him, his friend, and myself in the row, and then a bottle of wine and a mention of what hotel she was laying over in *heh*.



One time, during drink service on a flight, one of the first class flight attendants came way back to my row (in the steerage section) and practically bellowed (so everyone could hear) to me, "The gentleman in 1A wants to buy you a drink." ...WhaaaaaThaF?? Dude wants to buy me a drink?!?! My hetero jaw hit the tray-table. Boy...ya know....this was back in the '80s, when things like....that weren't....um.....so out in the open, so to speak. Probably un-PC to say this now, but I was pretty shocked and embarrassed, being a newbie, self-conscious flyer. I remember thinking "Is this what happens on airplane flights!?" I recovered from my shock, though, to politely decline the offer. After that, all the guys near me were snickering and/or shooting my funny looks. Remember, this was back in the 80s. But at least he must have had $$$$, ya know, being in first class in all....at least I attract the successful guys, lol.......
 ThroatLozenge
Joined: 3/2/2016
Msg: 27
humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/1/2017 10:10:33 AM
Did you get an erection??
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 28
humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/1/2017 10:16:40 AM
Ha!
Never heard of first class items being hauled to " steerage" all the food and drinks are accounted for.
I would have taken the free drink :) Who cares who is buying, prolly safe enuff on a plane.
Well unless Sam Jackson sitting near you, then you have to watch out for snakes
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 29
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humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/1/2017 11:29:06 AM
"Never heard of first class items being hauled to 'steerage' all the food and drinks are accounted for"

Not a first class story but when I was a late teen-ager I flew cabin solo from Vancouver to Los Angeles on Canadian Pacific airlines. (I suspect that really dates this story.)

There were so few passengers on this flight (maybe one to two dozen) I was surprised that they even took off. I got a second in-flight meal (and CP's meals were good in those days) and I remember being offered a third one.

I assume (but don't really know) that once a meal was loaded onto a flight it couldn't be taken off the plane and re-loaded on to a later flight.

I flew CP several times to and from Vancouver in that time period. Cabin was like first class; I can't imagine what first class was like.
 2ufo2
Joined: 8/29/2016
Msg: 30
humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/1/2017 12:33:18 PM
I flew Christmas Day once in the mid-90s. I was the only passenger on the flight and it was great. I highly suggest traveling on days when no one else travels.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 31
humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/1/2017 5:06:37 PM
I suppose if the same people keeping inventory are the ones doing the treating, the airlines back in the days probably chalked up to customer service, a dead idea these days if there ever is one. The young buck sitting next to me some 13+ years ago looked a tiny bit like John Cena, asked the stew if there was any meals left over could he have one since the meal was a bit small to his liking, and she brought back extra for him, his sales associate, and me since we were sharing a row near the bulkhead. Then as we approached final descent into the east coast, she brought back a bottle and mentioned the hotel she was spending the night at.

it was sweet to see him so flustered, a Midwest married man (I was likely flying in from O'Hell in Chicago, but I don't remember where this 20-something was from, but he was "corn fed" as they liked to say about themselves) who simply spoke up for him and his friend and got flirted with instead. Ah, its so nice when a pretty lady makes a pass. When my father came from O'Hell, he got those deep dish Chicago pizzas they used to sell at the airport, so I guess he never got a free extra dinner. Those things were hell to cook thru, tho.

But yes, a fellow buying another fellow a drink in front of a crowd of strangers locked together for hours...I guess even today it only "flies" if one of the fellows won the home team the winning touchdown. Because on a plane, everyone loves a good touchdown.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 32
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How do you know when a bartender is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/2/2017 1:27:55 PM
In the mid-80's there was a local bartender that worked in several different clubs/bars over time. He always remembered my name with a Big Smile. After my second beer, about every other beer for me was 'on the house' and I could put it away at that time.

I was so slow in those days. One night I was watching the attractive blond babe next to me keep getting 'house drinks' from another bartender. He was obviously hitting on her.

All of a sudden, my mind went "Ohhh! Oh my! Oh me!"
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 33
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humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/2/2017 3:49:09 PM
Clooney's Tutor wrote:

Did you get an erection??


Um.....no. Although I was young then, it took more than a guy offering to buy me a drink to give me an erection......and if I had gotten one, it would have been wasted because...besides my own personal little dates with Fistine..... I only allow women to squeeze my...um...citrus fruit....ref Roberts Johnson, and Plant
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 34
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humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/2/2017 4:03:37 PM
Ouija:


Never heard of first class items being hauled to " steerage" all the food and drinks are accounted for.
I would have taken the free drink :)
Um...and have some eager guy setting up a roadblock in the jetway ...expecting who knows what? See, I understand what you women have to consider when accepting drink offers from strange men. Strings attached. And that particular string, believe me, I did not want to pull. Or even see. Or even think about.


Who cares who is buying, prolly safe enuff on a plane.
Sure, if it was an unseen woman...probably would have accepted...after all, it's lonely on the road after all....but I had no interest in having "the gentleman in 1A" to fill that role.


Well unless Sam Jackson sitting near you, then you have to watch out for snakes
That type of snake wasn't the type of snake I was concerned about in this case. Actually, I like snakes. The kind you find in the woods. Not the kind you find by accepting a drink offer from a male stranger, apparently an admirer, traveling on your flight. That was my own "Traveling Riverside Blues" tale....maybe I can rearrange the lyrics to read no man can squeeze my lemon by buying me drinks...nor buying me anything else, for that matter.. The only nuts I'll accept on a flight are the free ones they give out...and those are the kind of nuts that grow on trees or dig out of the ground.
 flaneur001
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 35
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humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/2/2017 4:28:48 PM
I was on a flight Dec. 24th from San Francisco to Washington DC., I had a business/first class seat. An hour into the flight there was a rumble between the business class section and the economy section. An attendant was blocking a female passenger from using the first class bathroom. A few minutes later, the passenger somehow snuck by the attendant and was defiantly marching to the first class bathroom..only to be blocked by First Class (pit bull) Attendant. Then, another economy passenger joins the melee - 15 minutes of arguing for the rights of economy class to use the first class bathroom (they are identical). Anyhow, pit bull won the battle. Interesting theatre...with a glass of wine!
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 36
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humping your leg is sometimes a good sign
Posted: 1/5/2017 10:02:48 AM
Flaneur wrote:

I was on a flight Dec. 24th from San Francisco to Washington DC., I had a business/first class seat. An hour into the flight there was a rumble between the business class section and the economy section. An attendant was blocking a female passenger from using the first class bathroom. A few minutes later, the passenger somehow snuck by the attendant and was defiantly marching to the first class bathroom..only to be blocked by First Class (pit bull) Attendant. Then, another economy passenger joins the melee - 15 minutes of arguing for the rights of economy class to use the first class bathroom (they are identical). Anyhow, pit bull won the battle. Interesting theatre...with a glass of wine!


Such urgency.....Sounds like she maybe had a date with someone in First Class...to join the mile high club? Hey, atl least she had the standards to be entertained in the First Class bathroom..so give here a little credit here.

Maybe she accepted an anonymous drink from her own "gentleman in 1A."....which brings to mind something I had never though of...maybe MY "gentleman in 1A" wanted to join that club too. Yikes....back in the day flights were much more sparsely populated...probably easier to do......And to think I passed up on the only chance I have had to join...but that's OK....sheesh. *Shudder*
 browneyesboo
Joined: 7/1/2016
Msg: 37
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/5/2017 11:14:13 AM

where the heck do women get the idea that THEY know how to flirt, to begin with? I know we had segregated health classes in middle school. Was that where you women were trained in the specifics of flirting procedures? Is it REALLY like communicating with signal flags?

Or do you just assume that whatever you are doing to flirt is so obvious that only a fool would miss it?


Some people are just natural flirts.
Others learn it by noticing what attracts people...smiles, compliments, eye contact.
I'm thinking you must be joking with this post.
But then, you're always so analytical in your responses maybe you really don't have a soft side.
Children can flirt for pete's sake.
The problem is, not everyone can read cues, and those people are not necessarily fools.
Or they think someone smiling at them has an ulterior motive.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 38
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/5/2017 2:43:21 PM
SS454, sounds like you blew an opportunity to get blown by an opportunity :)

I don't know if some people are natural flirts, or if they just learned it, or maybe they are just natural touchers and it moves from there (Uncle Joe Biden would be a great example, he sure can't keep his hands to himself). Ladies tend to be generally more sociable than men, who can say a lot to another man in the room with a simple head nod and a grunt. Ladies can do more nonverbal communication. Flirting, to me, is showing extra attention to another human, it doesn't have to be sexual, it can be playful, and yes, kids can flirt, but don't flirt back :)

Some people aren't good at reading social cues, period. others don't read it from someone they aren't interested in. And some of course will see something that isn't there, with someone they do have the hots for :) I can think of times in my life a hottie gave me the "All clear" sign, but I never expected to see it, and so I didn't, and it didn't come again so I blew that opportunity.
 CarefreeBeauty
Joined: 5/30/2014
Msg: 39
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/5/2017 3:08:52 PM
GTO---
I can think of times in my life a hottie gave me the "All clear" sign, but I never expected to see it, and so I didn't, and it didn't come again so I blew that opportunity.


If you didn't see the sign, that you never expected to see in the first place, and never saw that sign again---how is that an opportunity blown to hook up with that elusive hottie?

Mind boggling~
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 40
when she pays the restaurant bill. Or tells you to go away, that's a surefire sign of interest
Posted: 1/5/2017 10:22:36 PM
Not sure how a guy is supposed to know I'm flirting with him when I don't even know if I'm flirting with him.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 41
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/6/2017 4:36:37 AM
Sometimes, I did not recognize a potential sign until it was too late. Sometimes, it was from a lady younger than I, or someone who told me before, she didn't date people like me (a friend, etc), so I didn't expect it, but she'd mention at another time it was a move she put on guys she liked (one example, a coworker kept trying to bring me to her house to get drunk, and I knew that would be bad b/c i'd likely make a move, and then she started dating another coworker who she got drunk with so many times that "something happened", and magically there was a condom at the time b/c she was caught with it in the bedroom). Now, all the potential scenarios could have been coincidence, or they might not have been.

The problem with these opportunities, is that they're only that. The drunken coworker hookup may come to work tomorrow with "I was drunk, I was feeling the affects of the Christmas holiday", and it makes things uncomfortable. Or a friend gets friendly, and what happens when that passes and she finds a hotter guy she'd rather be with? Will she ghost or handle it well? What happens when the little head stops thinking and the big head comes back from vacation? What happens when the

"Women who 'like' men delight in the difference between the sexes and occasionally or often, imagine what we'd like any particular man to 'do' to us. In our imagination, if not in real life.

returns from carrying out her imagination and experimenting with what its like, and comes back to real life again? Some of us guys think too much about ramifications, and others misinterpret George Clinton's advice--free the mind, and the ass will follow. :)


Unfortunately for guys like me, we don't attract hotties, we just have moments where a wall comes down. Its why they call it "getting lucky". Now if I boggled minds with my looks rather than my intelligence, it would be a different story :) The signals would be more constant. But sometimes you're an acquaintance with someone, its a long cold winter, and the lass is willing to "settle". I used to work with a fellow who had an attractive woman hanging out with him for reasons of "location", and she kept mentioning she couldn't find someone and was thinking of doing the bar scene, and his response was, "ew, that's how you catch STDs". we said he should have asked, "well, what about me?" y'know, women generally wanting men to lead and chase, and all that.

see, guys are so simple. we want it, and that's that :)
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 42
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/6/2017 5:03:58 PM
Why do you think that GTO? Every woman I know seizes the day and certainly doesn't wait to be led nor chased.
btw, you I am sure have lots to offer, quit saying someone is settling for you
It;s like that meme.. someone guy flirts with me
Excuse me Sir are you lost?
 Whatsamattababy
Joined: 5/3/2016
Msg: 43
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/6/2017 5:14:37 PM
Right?? On the rare occasion that happens, I'm pretty sure my immediate reaction is a furrowed brow and mouth agape sort of look. Probably not very "come hither".
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 44
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/6/2017 5:25:38 PM
There are some women who seize the day, which is great when asking her out might raise the ire of HR or she's a friend and he doesn't want to take the risk. All my relationships came about this way, whenever I went and asked out a woman (who hadn't already shown obvious interest), I got a no for a response. Still, there were some ex gfs who flirted, but still waited for me to show interest by actually asking out and planning something. They still had "Deniability", I was the one who had to reach out and take the chance by putting my thoughts/wants out there in words. Does that count as "leading"? It depends upon the person.

Dating coaches, people posting here, etc, like the idea of a man leading. Maybe they think its old fashioned. Maybe they just want to be pursued--who doesn't like to be chased politely? Most of the girls I asked out who said no, followed with something along the lines of "thank you for the compliment". Not b/c I was BMOC, but I guess they knew what it was like to ask someone out, and thought they must be worth the effort. People like what they like, and everyone likes something.

http://www.yourtango.com/experts/yourtango-experts/3-reasons-men-need-take-lead-relationships
http://nevertoolate.biz/2014/07/03/understanding-men-letting-man-lead-clears-dating-confusion/
http://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/dating-tips-advice/if-you-want-to-date-a-confident-leader-you-have-to-let-him-lead/

Maybe half my relationships didn't "go all the way". For sure, the women were in the lead there :) Thanks for the compliment, when I said settling, I just meant in the looks dept. I know a few of those exs weren't going to go all the way b/c they were less interested in my looks than in my company...and I know that b/c one or two admitted it, in their way. One of my last gfs, who still calls me to this day to complain about her husband, was a fun person and wanted to marry me the night she met me, but...I wasn't gobsmacked by her looks. so it cuts both ways. (but she's doing her husband and his stepkids a massive benefit by being married to them, she's gotten the kids into counseling and is helping him with his back problems and such).

Relationships should be two way streets, but for the most part, the more interested party is...not in the driver seat. That may sound like sour grapes, but it just tends to be true. Even in business, the company that needs the other company less, makes more of the decisions/rules in the contract.

PostScript: I probably should have said in msg 42 that some of the ladies I was talking about, may go under the title, "hot mess" :)
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 45
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/6/2017 6:03:56 PM
BF likes hot mess me, that or he is scared I'll torch his house LOL
I'm too big to fit in the lap of whoever is driving
Relationships should prolly be 3 way streets :/
Meanwhile, puppers is nearly healed and I am glad I fixed her intead of buying the boots that would have changed my life.
They were that nice
whimper
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 46
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/7/2017 7:00:44 AM
"On the rare occasion that happens, I'm pretty sure my immediate reaction is a furrowed brow and mouth agape sort of look. Probably not very "come hither"."

>>>the first lady I dated from the Internet, we emailed a bit b/c it was long distance, and after it got to flirting, she mentioned one day that the fellow handling the film developing dept at WalMart (that's how long ago it was) actually flirted with her that day, he never did before. I mentioned she probably had stopped acting like someone's mom, and with all the flirting was presenting herself to the world differently. Certainly in her photos (snailmailed to me) she was dressed in comfortable "mom" clothes. I'm sure there are people who have walked into a store to conduct a chore, that was their mindset, and the person behind the counter or behind them in line found them fetching, flirted, and the recipient went huh? They just weren't in the mindset.

over in the relationship forum, people are arguing what "casual not looking for a relationship" really means. the consensus is, no one has a clue what it really means. it could mean anything, b/c we're not all on the same page. Some of us may just be testing the waters, some may just be looking for a reaction, some may already know what they want. That confusion itself may make flirting difficult to understand--is someone we know isn't ready for a relationship, flirting with us to be friendly, b/c they really know what they want, or somewhere in between?

Ouija, i'm sure the bf likes hot mess you, HMs are fun until they torch the house :) Maybe he'll get you the boots. Like everyone likes to say around here, can't hurt much to ask. :)
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 47
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/7/2017 8:00:36 AM
no cause I got boots for Xmas. But then you know
another pair always appear on my feed
Flirting is an Art. Lost to most myself included
 drivingharmony2
Joined: 1/2/2017
Msg: 48
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/7/2017 8:24:23 AM
[Uncle Joe Biden would be a great example, he sure can't keep his hands to himself/]

Good grief....how many women and children can this man kiss in a day. My upper cheek would need to use antibacterial gel stat!
==
Ahhhhh flirting......I remember, maybe 5 years ago, shopping with a friend. We were at the check out line and there was a very handsome cashier, young man (probably 20 years younger.) He made me laugh about something. After the transaction, my friend says I was flirting with him which I denied. She said my laugh was different? WTF???? So who knows, may be it was subconscious flirting as I don't think I was flirting but did find him cute.....but wayyyyyy tooo young.
==
Sometimes I try and flirt with my BF, but he usually says "Is something wrong with your eye?"
So I am with Ouija.....flirting is a lost art, clearly I have no clue..... :)
 zonavar68
Joined: 8/16/2015
Msg: 49
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How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/9/2017 4:18:00 AM

The problem is, not everyone can read cues, and those people are not necessarily fools.
Or they think someone smiling at them has an ulterior motive.


That is exactly my issue. I can't read the body language, etc. and any time I think a woman is actually taking an interest I start to get suspicious and tend to react with an automatic 'fight or flight' reponse that makes me leave because I find women (especially very naturally attractive women) intimidating. ;-( I guess as a late-40's guy who's dated probably 5 women and had one really long relationship that ended badly my 'wiring' is formed to not be able to decipher genuine interest from almost 'fake' "lets hook up" signalling.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 50
How do you know when a women is flirting with you?
Posted: 1/9/2017 6:58:06 AM
Its hard to enjoy dancing with a hot stove. If you instinctively feel you're going to get burned, then flirting and romance won't ever seem to feel fun naturally. And if you felt you were taken advantage of, that flirting was used to trick you, then its even worse. Who wouldn't believe its all fake?
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