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 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 176
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & GentlemanPage 8 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
NewYorker58, Yeah sorry for saying that stuff and I feel like an A hole...It really had nothing to do with me, how well you got on with your dad, but it was nice of you to talk about your parents..Yes sounds like they had a rare marriage and it would be wonderful to be with a woman, I could agree with about everything...would make life so simple...just supporting each other in everything and building each other up....making each other smile and feel good most of the time

I agree men should not try to change women and women should not to try to change men...I did change, while I was with my ex, but by choice, My sleeping habits matched hers and I had to be very tidy, because her home was spotless, but, I also learnt to just listen to her and be a good ear for her, because sometimes that's all that's needed...to just to be understanding and show that you care...

I was wrong about you and sorry to read about your dad's health problems...Lost my mum a couple of years ago and she was such a wonderful lady, with a real zest for life, even though, she was suffering with Multiple Sclerosis, she wrote poems, did gardening, drawing, used the computer, wrote a daily diary and many others things...my dad stuck by her and he is also a great person...they both worked ,before she became ill and my nan used to look after me sometimes...My mother is the definition of a good woman and a great mum...I will always miss her forever
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 177
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History
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 4:56:06 PM
No problem, LBG64.

I truly don't hate men. My parents were a great example, and I wish every child had parents like that. It really does set the tone for how you view men and women in your life. My dad did cooking and cleaning while my mom worked, so I view men as being able to do it all. Then with my mom working, I viewed women as being able to do it all too. They still had somewhat traditional roles. He did like to buy my mom things and she never wanted them. So I'm like that too. I'm not into material things, but do enjoy little niceties. One ex always used to tell everyone that I never ask for anything. I never really got that, like do women ask for things? He was a generous person though, and would not accept me paying for anything ever. I would get him especially nice gifts throughout the year, because it feels as good or even better to give as it is to receive, and I know he really enjoyed what I bought him.

In the end, whatever we expect from each other for femininity or chivalry, we all just have to find people that do things we require to make us feel good. I think a lot of it does come from being almost hardwired for it from what we see at home, but not always.
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 178
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 5:20:09 PM
@laidback you did the exact same thing mother of my kids did. She became like me because of habits installed into her in our relationship. I didn't force to change and never got upset but I was clean and neat the rules have always been posted in my house. It was simple they come with me regardless of where I live and people have to respect my wishes in my home. The way I see it anyone who dont respect your home, your things they're not your friends and they dont respect you. Here's a list of the rules.

Rules of home.

1. If you open it, close it.

2. If you turn it on, turn it off.

3. If you unlock it, lock it up.

4. If you break it, admit it.

5. If you can't fix it, call in someone who can.

6. If you borrow it, return it.

7. If you value it, take care of it.

8. If you make a mess, clean it up.

9. If you move it, put it back.

10. If it belongs to someone else, get permission to use it.

11. If you don't know how to operate it, leave it alone.

12. If it's none of your business, don't ask questions.

After we split up and my daughters go to her house ask her why is she always cleaning she goes blame your father he got me in the habit of maintaining a clean home it's his fault. We split 15 years ago they dont believe her :)

But that's the thing we follow certain protocols and teachings but really cant show them that much here because people think liar even if you tell the truth, so tell them truth let them think your lying and it works the best lie is the truth.

I dont know why people have problem with the meet me, function just view as what it is a quick like I use it on occasion. It's there I am curious on the rewards in might bring click see what happens, I dont expect nothing really but if I feel a woman really wont respond anyways she gets one just to see. If a woman thinks I am whatever for using it's her opinion she is going to think it regardless of what I do anyways. And chances are if I sent her a message the result would be the same anyways.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 179
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 6:25:21 PM
^ ^ ^ ^ You forgot one.
If you empty it, fill it.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 180
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Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 7:42:51 PM
^^^^^ Does that apply to the toilet?
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 181
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 8:14:26 PM
think it refers to the wine glass :P
 halcyon_skies
Joined: 7/27/2015
Msg: 182
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/2/2017 11:20:53 PM
NewYorker58 says:


One ex always used to tell everyone that I never ask for anything. I never really got that, like do women ask for things?


I find it to be disingenuous that you’re now claiming that you never ask for things. You started a thread where you griped about men whom you perceive as cheap because they wanted to do a meet and greet as opposed to a first date:

https://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts16626339.aspx

You stated in your opening message:


From suggestions when they do list them, they say it's not a first date, but a meet and greet. How pathetic and a way to size someone up to see if they're worthy of spending money or time on them first. What a bad attitude and cheap!


You then stated in message 3 that you never offer to contribute on dates because you are a lady:


No, I don't contribute, I'm the lady. Last time I checked, women of our era either didn't work or most made much less than men


Message 19 you said:


What I require is a very small expenditure.


So yes, what you asked for is that the man always pays on dates. You also implied that women who contribute to dates are settling for less.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 183
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 5:58:11 AM
"think it refers to the wine glass :P" Best line of the week.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 184
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:04:35 AM

It's just the way it is. Men that are available now tend to not know how to make a relationship work. I have no problem finding dates, but I want a quality person. So many woman haters on pof. I'm not a man hater; I'm not a marcher wearing pink and listening to speeches by man hating women.



There are many men that only make themselves available, when they want. Those men, do have problems "finding" a date, because they know and can see quality before even asking for that moment of initial discovery, which we now call "dates". Those ones don't hate women, they just don't enjoy or view them all as one. When we (both genders) make our own choices of what we are attracted to, by default, we are putting those others into another category. That category will sometimes be labelled as something negative, instead of just as something that we, as individuals don't find appealing.

Now, one thing we should understand, NO TWO "relationships" between people are the same. Sure there can be some "basic" concepts on certain things that should be followed but, again, it's not set in stone for those relationships to "work" or be "successful". Even the words "work" and "successful" can be different for individuals in a partnership. This will include what I think the OP brings up in her initial post/question. If it "works" for the individuals in a partnership/relationship, it shouldn't really matter to the rest of us looking in from the outside.

I'm still trying to figure out what wearing pink and marching has anything to do with a successful "relationship"?????
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 185
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:21:52 AM
NewYorker58, Yes a lot of children these days, don't have the luxury of stability and a happy household, because of the way society is and people, not putting the effort into relationships anymore and staying together. Your mum and dad seem like good folks.

Yes material things mean nothing really, yes they are nice to have, but can't replace human kindness.
Women do drop hints, about things they want and say it would be nice if I had that, Or talk about a friends husband, just buying her a diamond ring...
How is your tea dear? My friends husband, just brought her a diamond ring and he's such a good man, did you see this catalogue? would you like me to give you foot rub? You know charm, suggestion and putting the guy on the spot.

Now women have equality and job stability, I can't see any reason at all for a woman, not to go dutch on a meal, or even offer to pay...I used to take it in turns, with my ex to pay, she was really great about things, like that and we both brought each other gifts. The truth be told, my ex treated me to a meal, on my Birthday and that was our very first date, so that was a great feeling and it made me feel special TBH, but I always insisted we took it in turns after that, unless it was a birthday.
I think all women should be that way and I have a lot more respect for a woman, that has those qualities and it proves the woman is not in it for the money

Well it's hard to meet the right woman and I stand by what I said, about femininity dying and society being rotten to the core.. Most politicians are toxic and don't identify with real people...most are greedy, self centred, self serving, manipulative and lie...they run countries and it's no surprise that the toxic agendas, rules and ideas, dominate society.

I think modern technology also has something to do with, the toxic society, because many people are on their phones and computers, but not communicating in a face to face environment and they become ignorant to kind gestures.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 186
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:43:50 AM

I'm still trying to figure out what wearing pink and marching has anything to do with a successful "relationship"?????

I have to agree Walts.
There seems to be some confusion here.

If I saw people "marching" AND wearing pink, I would guess they were participating in an event for breast cancer.

"The pink ribbon is an international symbol of breast cancer awareness. Pink ribbons, and the color pink in general, identify the wearer or promoter with the breast cancer brand and express moral support for women with breast cancer. Pink ribbons are most commonly seen during National Breast Cancer Awareness Month."
Pink ribbon - Wikipedia
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pink_ribbon

Or ....................A Mary Kay marching rally? LOL
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 187
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:50:40 AM

Yes a lot of children these days, don't have the luxury of stability and a happy household, because of the way society is and people, not putting the effort into relationships anymore and staying together. Your mum and dad seem like good folks


"Staying together", and stability are not one and the same. Sure, it can give you the perspective of stability but, we all know that is not always true. Deciding as adults that being together increases the toxicity and negativity under the same roof, is not always a bad thing. Many of us can be divorced, split or whatever and still show our young many positives along the way, can actually be more beneficial to our children in the end.

Relationships change with time. To deny it, or to "stay together" because of the children is bum backwards thinking. Now, there are ways we can deal with the evolution of a relationships, no matter what direction the relationship is going. THAT, is up to each individual, and what they believe and think. As an example we can bring up the subject of the ceremony of "marriage". In that ceremony, words/promises are made. Are those words/promises an actual goal, or just a wish?
A goal without a plan, is a wish. A plan without action is useless.



I think modern technology also has something to do with, the toxic society,


Actually, it's the people and how they use, or not use, this so-called "modern technology". It's kind of like looking at a gun. At times the use of a gun, can be beneficial. Other times,,,, well, we know the negative sides of the gun. Technology has always evolved, it's just that many parts of society don't know how to use it for benefits only. Again, we can use dating sites like this as an example. It's a tool that can be used many different ways. Not all of those ways will lead to "good" things.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 188
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 7:03:44 AM
Walts. Are you always so rude? Cutting in on other peoples conversations? I was talking NewYorker58, did you see your name in my post? If it's a general statement I don't use peoples names and it's opened for discussion, but if it's a conversation I do use peoples names and it's not opened to outside disscussion. Do you understand how a conversation works?
BTW how many profiles have you got? Jackcrusto...is always rudely cutting in on other people's conversations too...I wonder?
 flaneur001
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 189
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History
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 7:43:15 AM
Laidbackguy: Walt was not being rude or cutting in on other peoples conversations.

This is a forum with threads that people participate in. If you wanted to have a 'private' conversation with NewYorker58 then you can send her a private email.

Don't insult or berate Walts for participating in an open forum.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 190
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:01:57 AM
flaneur001, Now your cutting in and attacking me...OMG...What's happened to sanity and manners? People can still have one on one conversations on these forums. I see them often and I see no problem at all with them, but you do for some reason?
Don't tell me what to do...who do you think you are, the queen? Ha, ha

Watts, I have the right to ignore rude people who cut in, on one on one conversations on here...so be aware of that...I told you straight, the difference between one on one conversations and general statements, but you still don't seem to understand the difference?
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 191
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:14:21 AM

Walts. Are you always so rude? Cutting in on other peoples conversations? I was talking NewYorker58, did you see your name in my post? If it's a general statement I don't use peoples names and it's opened for discussion, but if it's a conversation I do use peoples names and it's not opened to outside disscussion. Do you understand how a conversation works?



Should I assume because my name is included in this post of yours that I have your permission to voice my opinion them and them alone????? Cause, the last thing I want to be is,,,,, rude!!!!! :P

I know if I want to have private conversation, I would keep them private. (we have the option of private emails here just FYI) Right now, you are typing words in a open forum which can and will, have others stepping in to add to. That's what forums are. It is not a place to have PRIVATE CONVERSATION without others stepping into. By typing your words in a open forum, you, be default, have opened yourself up to other's comments. Don't like it????? Then do, please, keep "your conversations" private.



BTW how many profiles have you got? Jackcrusto...is always rudely cutting in on other people's conversations too...I wonder?


One. That is until I hit the whiskey. Then, there can enough that the actual numbers can not be accounted for. I've been here since the dinosaurs, and have found no need to play the fifty profile in a month game. Oh, I much "nicer" then I was wayyyyyy back when. It comes with the added years.
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 192
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:16:04 AM
Roflmao @laidbackguy who are you try to fool on here people or yourself? No actually you dont see them often you see people who really dont care to bother posting or commenting on certain things. It's not about sanity and manners as they dont apply in anonymous and opening chatting but good luck with that. You have a nice act but that all it is see if this was a true conversation from the get go you would have to wait your turn to even be invited to speak or introduced see you were not either wouldn't that in fact mean you have no manners.

Then again since manners are following rules regardless of what other people post and you were actually following the manners you would always stay on point and you response to flaneur or anyone else that has nothing to do with topic is not mannerly so you yourself are exposed. That is why online is not real life it is a fantasy world and you are nothing more than a pixel, and since you are classified as nothing more on her since it is not IRL the only rules you should even follow is that of POF being a guest at their site after all.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 193
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:32:19 AM
Nestaron, You do know your talking like a serious****ead don't you...Making an issue about, two people having a one on one conversation on here and sniping me...WTF is your problem...Your nothing more than a serious knob head..OMG how moronic can you be to cut in and snipe me over this stuff...**** you

Pearl, your libeling and I,ve had this shit before...Just fuckoff and don't talk to me, if you don't like, what I have to say...I only show respect to those, who show it and you earn zero from me

Nestaron, All you did was bust your brain, writing your crap...

Idiots like these two...just want to annoy folks and get a reaction from them...Do me a favour you two and get a room
 The_Pearl
Joined: 2/7/2017
Msg: 194
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:39:37 AM
Truthfully...You're starting to sound like Jack Crusty...more and more...lol.
I thought you two may be the same person...the way you chat each other up...too funny!
Now...go get Jack.

You don't like people randomly posting on a forum...leave.
In fact, it's a rule on here....take it private...moron!!
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 195
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:47:21 AM
And that ladies and gentlemen is how you bust a poser. :P
 Jackcrusto
Joined: 2/27/2017
Msg: 196
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:55:16 AM

You're starting to sound like Jack Crusty


Look pearl I got no desire to get sh!tty and rude with you on here. I got you on my do not reply to list as well so this is the last post I will reference to you. Do you think you can get off my balls already and maybe go a few minutes without mentioning me in your posts? If you can manage that maybe you could manage your obsession with me to maybe go a whole day without thinking of me or mentioning me in a post? Then when you get that much of your lust for me out of your system maybe you can rid yourself of me entirely and just leave my name out of your mouth or keyboard forever. Don't say you have this obsession just because you hate me because we all know there is a thin line between love and hate. I know many of you ladies that are having this issue have not heard from a real man like me in a very long time but seriously get control of your hormones because I am not interested ladies.

Your sincerest thanks,

Crusty
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 197
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 11:48:01 AM
And the lesson for the week is stop trying to control other people or dictate who can speak to whom and when, you own nobody they are their own person and in control of themselves. Accept the things you cannot change, the courage to change the things you can and the wisdom to know the difference.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 198
view profile
History
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 12:01:32 PM
I don't ask for things, like material things. I do expect a little expenditure of a drink, simple casual food, paying for gas which all involves them enjoying themselves too. I don't consider that asking for something, it's expected, it's nothing and meaningless unless a guy is cheap. Some guys don't want to enjoy life, even if they only do it for themselves. Guys I am not interested in. Men tended to express their feeling thru dating and it was an investment for them of sorts. Guys may not want to do it now because so many are disgruntled and not really liking women, but want sex so they'll do as little as humanely possible to make that happen. How distasteful!!! It really shows the man does not care! Everyone has a choice to desire a certain type of man and I do not desire one that's cheap with me or himself that does not want to enjoy life.

I will offer home cooked meals, involving shopping, cooking, serving and cleaning up. I think that's pretty nice!!! How often does someone do that for you? A man is just sticking his hand in his pocket for pennies with no other effort. I think it's a great deal and men love the attention to detail with cooking what they like and being waited on hand and foot. But, everyone does what is doable for themselves, so I'm happy with whatever it is. I don't pay for dates. I have offered money in LTRs or when I lived with men, so not a dating scenario. I took care of my student husband with all of his financial needs and for pleasure, but again, we were married. It's just the way I feel. Don't we all do what makes us feel right with the world?

Cheap doesn't always involve me with making that determination. It's how someone tips or doesn't bother to tip. It's seeing a man not give anything to his mother on Mother's Day, a double edged sword. Cheap and not honoring one's mother. It's stingy with things that don't even involve money. One guy was taken aback because a neighbor asked to borrow my bathroom plunger. Really.....lol, you don't interact with neighbors and help each other? Cheap, not wanting to help others, all very undesirable qualities to me. I buy chocolate Easter bunnies for my neighbor's daughter. If she drops by and asks if I have cookies, I give her whatever I have, not just one cookies. I like the spirit of generosity. I'm giving and I like people who are like that and not looking to say mine, mine, LOL!!!

If todays women want to pay for dates entirely or partly, that's up to them if they can afford to do so as things are different today, but I'm still holding firm to traditions from my era. I'm 59. Nope, not paying for dates. It just wasn't the right thing for women to do in my time. It still does not feel right.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 199
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 12:59:31 PM
Now I'm ticked off and you said in your last post, that material things did not mean nothing to you, yet you think a man must pay, for every date and your fuel? What? are you serious? Dream on...Why would a man pay for just your company, when he can get sex from a hooker for money?...Talk about a gold digger... omg...How disappointing and You showed your true colours...why did you lie in your last post? why? what was the point?

Why won't you put your hand in your pocket and at least pay for yourself? who do you think you are a princess? besides if women are empowered and so liberated and equal to men, then why do they still think a man owes them anything?
going dutch or taking it in turns to pay is fair and not cheap at all, but expecting anything else is greed and gold digging...Men do like good women, but they are waking up to being robbed and used by gold digging bad women...

halcyon_skies, you exposed her, but I was going to give her the benefit of the doubt and put it down to a bad day, but she is obviously a gold digger
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBTTjkwpKF4
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 200
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 2:21:12 PM
Well well Nest.. I do believe you are correct.
I mean since we can type shitty
whats the odds 2 ppl would type it with a bang?
Ah yes, Leon needed company
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