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 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 201
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Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & GentlemanPage 9 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
Good Lord, not pay for my gas!!!! I mean a date where no money is spent, he still has to spend money on gas. No man pays for my bills. I would not accept the offer, I can take care of myself. Being materialistic is about accepting GIFTS. It's not about accepting a drink. That's just part of dating. You sound super cheap and that's okay, there's someone out there for you.

LBG, wow, you're equating going on a date as wasted money, because you can hire someone for sex? A date can cost as little as $10. Let's broaden that to $25. Please post pics of the hooker you employ for $10-$25. I can see you in some dark alley with a crack whore, LOL. If all you want is sex, then I guess an Adam's apple won't stand in your way if "she" has one, lol. Having a $10 drink is gold digging, or an inexpensive meal is gold digging? How sad that you make that parallel between dating and sex. Your misogyny is showing. Really, if that's all you want, that's fine and very easily accomplished. Lucky you! I'm not going to say anything to put you down for what you want and how you want to get it, that's your personal choice and I have mine. You sound super cheap, but that's okay, it's between you and the hooker you pay.

Dating is not swapping money spent for getting sex unless that's all you want. Then by all means, go find that crack whore. No man gets sex from me for money spent, it's something that comes from a loving relationship and not a few dates. I never misrepresented myself. I enjoy being taken out on dates, doesn't have to be expensive, and that is my position and it has not changed. I reciprocate with a home cooked dinner and picnics, which means spending money, but I won't do it outright on a date by taking a man out for dinner or drinks, especially for the beginning dates, they have more self respect for themselves. The men I date would not be accepting that.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 202
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 4:34:37 PM
Well, you really proved to me, what type of woman, you really are...Money orientated, greedy and completely mixted up in, your own world...Where did this crack whore, idea come from? Is she one of your friends...like you say, a man has to pay for your company afterall.

misogyny, by me saying, that women should pay their share for a date? Are you sure...omg...

You don't see your problem do you? You expect a man to pay for you, as if he is paying for escorts and men do take escorts out, without having sex? Sum just want the company of a beautiful woman, if he has the money to pay..

We are not living in the past anymore...women earn as much, as men and some much more...When women were looking after the house and had no income, then I could understand the man paying for them, but we are living in different times and if you want to be treated the same as a man, then you should share the cost of a date or at least pay your own end...or you won't be respected as an equal by the guy, from the very beginning, because he has paid for your company, just like he would an escort

I would never pay for a woman who expected me too...not a chance!!!! Good women don't use men for money, they pay their own way!!! Like my ex did...Gold digger is a woman who expects a man to pay for her and that's a fact!!! I thought you might have more respect for yourself, but sadly you don't

I can bet all you would have waiting for a guy at your place, would be a cheap ready meal and a glass of water, because money is so sacred to you...Tight as a ducks ass you are...

BTW..If it's so cheap to buy a drink, pay for a meal and fuel...why won't you pay your way? Yep gotcha on that one
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 203
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 4:44:54 PM
Lmao Ouija I think this is a love hate relationship. I got a song for that Peaches & Herb

I was a fool to ever leave your side
Me minus you is such a lonely ride
The breakup we had has made me lonesome and sad
I realize I love you 'cause I want you bad, hey, hey

I spent the evening with the radio
Regret the moment that I let you go
Our quarrel was such a way of learnin' so much
I know now that I love you 'cause I need your touch, hey, hey

Reunited, and it feels so good
Reunited 'cause we understood
There's one perfect fit
And, sugar, this one is it
We both are so excited 'cause we're reunited, hey, hey

I sat here starin' at the same old wall
Came back to life just when I got your call
I wished I could climb right through the telephone line
And give you what you want so you will still be mine, hey, hey

I can't go cheatin', honey; I can't play
I found it very hard to stay away
As we reminisce on precious moments like this
I'm glad we're back together 'cause I missed your kiss, hey, hey

Reunited, and it feels so good
Reunited 'cause we understood
There's one perfect fit
And, sugar, this one is it
We both are so excited 'cause we're reunited, hey, hey

Yeah, yeah, yeah
Baby

Lover, lover, this is solid love
And you're exactly what I'm dreamin' of
All through the day
And all through the night
I'll give you all the love I have with all my might, hey, hey

Reunited, and it feels so good
Reunited 'cause we understood
There's one perfect fit
And, sugar, this one is it
We both are so excited 'cause we're reunited, hey, hey
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 204
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History
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 5:57:55 PM
Buy a GUY the first drink. Do it several weekends in a row. Try to ignore when you get frequently rejected with snotty comments and name calling about personal body parts. Go ahead and feel self-entitled for the money you just spent. Does that REALLY make you feel better about who you are? Guys react that way because they DO get hurt, and they DO get ignored, and they don't 'get' why the hell they are supposed to keep doing it again and again expecting something to change.

Jeezus Cripes - don't you get sick of eating your way through a dozen (or more) tubes of lipstick a year? It's whale fat or something equally as disgusting. That crap doesn't digest well. But, I suppose, changing the color or shade is enough of an effort to makes the world change and makes all of that effort well worth it -- someday.

If you feel our ancient gender roles are so damn important that they be followed to the letter, then please, define what 'letter' that may be. It won't be a short one. People don't act or react the same to the same behavior - EVER - because how we determine what is Noble, Chivalrous, Decent, Masculine or Feminine is found in some mystery spot between our own ears -- and we are absolutely terrified of opening up that can of worms, allowing ourselves to be vulnerable, allowing our fears and secrets to be known --- AND allowing a chance at love - unconditionally.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 205
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:21:13 PM
But SweetD, no one is telling you that you MUST keep up with the on line struggle.
Try other avenues.
Not everyone is good/great at everything..
I had a boss who wanted to play chess during breaks, he never won against. Went from friendly to Mortal Combat serious. Then we played for money.
He couldn't win, but he wouldn't quit.. be ****ed I was throwing a game for him
I bought some nice jewellery with his money -
He should have challenged me to ping pong :)
 forumslady
Joined: 12/7/2016
Msg: 206
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 6:31:41 PM
Sweet Danimal- Dang, I thought I was the only one in a bad mood today, I guess not. :o
I think you know that women deal with rejection too, you would almost have to know that, at your age.
That isn't a put down, I'm older than you are.
Single hood isn't always a cake walk, for either gender.
I'm a bit past being considered a "hottie" or whatever the term is these days for a young, single woman, but when I go out, I still do pretty good with men chatting me up.
Sometimes, to my regret.
I'm redheaded and have been asked, 3 times no less, if the carpet matches the drapes.
Twice, I gave a frosty look , then moved away. Once, I gave the guy an answer all right, but it's better if I don't put here what I said to him.
Women get stood up, propositioned right away, there were two or three threads going right here on the forums where men admitted doing a "drive by", scoping out the woman in the parking lot and then driving off when they didn't like what they saw. Still others admitted to at least going in side, but then walking right back out.
Rudeness and crass behavior is NOT exclusive to females.
Trust me, single women go through some serious bs just the same as single men do.
What I realize, and I'm bound and determined not to get so jaded that I forget this, is that EACH person is responsible for their behavior.
Ok, there are some REALLY crappy people in the world, but there are good ones too.
I wouldn't be me if I focused on the bad ones to the point that I don't see the good ones.
They are out there, in BOTH genders.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 207
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Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:17:48 PM
You're equating taking a woman on a date as prostitution, you are a lost cause, a cheap misogynist. That's okay, I'm sure there are women out there with low self esteem that you may coerce into dating you.

That's right, I see nothing wrong with being taken out on a date. It's what normal people do. If you don't want to be normal, that's okay. I'm generous with friends and who I date. I choose to do it my way, but at least I'm doing it. For the last guy I was dating, I made chicken franchese with mashed potatoes, corn and broccoli, and drank wine I also used in the sauce. I made zucchini bread for dessert. Before and after dinner, I had things for him to snack on. He hadn't seen a home cooked meal in over a year. I sent him home with leftovers, something I always do. Another meal I made him was a rack of baby back ribs with home made fries and oven roasted asparagus, and another meal was a home made pizza with home made sauce with ice cream for dessert. I feel I cook and the men don't, so I'd rather them have the leftovers to enjoy. I'm not a big meat eater, but the men are so I make things that they would like. I'm an excellent cook. I make a great picnics and bring food for snacking on road trips. No one can ever say they didn't have a good time when they were with me. For me, it's about creating an experience, and I appreciate that being done for me also. I usually don't have liquor around, but do have spring water, soda, tea and juice. They're always welcome to bring something they want to drink if I don't have it. I'm not a restaurant, lol.
 Maria11418
Joined: 3/14/2017
Msg: 208
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:22:33 PM
I offer gentlemen drinks on occasion, at the bar... they rarely accept... most of the time they get slightly embarrassed and offer me one instead. I come from the heart though!
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 209
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 8:23:26 PM
^^^gee, now i'm hungry and its like a half hour before midnight. well, until this:

"don't you get sick of eating your way through a dozen (or more) tubes of lipstick a year? It's whale fat or something equally as disgusting. That crap doesn't digest well. But, I suppose, changing the color or shade is enough of an effort to makes the world change and makes all of that effort well worth it -- someday."

>>>its the fat cut off steaks, and when you watch the meat renderings guy pick it up in July..well, i'll say no more, b/c about 7 lbs of it gets swallowed in a wearer's lifetime. But the colors sure do look nice.

i'm horribly biased, but its nice when in life, you can afford to lose a few dollars on someone by buying them something that makes them smile or feel better. if you've ever had a meal with a good person and had mentally stimulating conversation, sometimes its nice to cover the bill as a thank-you for the confirmation there's good people out there. I've done it and recently had it done to me.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 210
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 9:20:01 PM
NewYorker58, Your the one who's stuck on men paying for your company and you only value a man on, how much he tips the waiter? seriously? you pay a lot of attention to other people being tight with spending money, but you don't look at yourself...not spending one dollar towards a date and why don't you pay the tip if it bothers you that much...
your not being generous with who you date, because your not even paying for yourself on a date...your being the polar opposite
...No not misogynist, are you a feminazi?

Your a gold digger and one of my exes was a lot like you...you make a man feel guilty for not spending money on you, degrading him, trying to make him feel small...

Example - you don't love me, if you don't buy me that...do you put a price on me? Am a not worth the price of that diamond ring...do you think that little of me...I thought you cared about me...you selfish **stard.....I hate you

gold digger mentality, Self centred, manipulative. greedy and nasty
 forumslady
Joined: 12/7/2016
Msg: 211
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 9:21:21 PM
gtomustang- All right now, don't tempt me to get into snacking.
Besides, I'm not in the habit of eating my lipstick. I don't know any women who do. :o
Gloss does look tempting sometimes, when I'm thirsty.
Blusher might work, in a pinch, isn't that mostly talc though? :D

If being gracious means you're biased, then I'm happy to be biased too.

So much about life is about perception.
That point is made abundantly clear, in the difference of attitudes demonstrated here on pof.

I'm not even grouchy any more. A phone call from a friend changed that.
I doubt I would have those, if I stayed po'd, 24/7.

We all have our moments, but I find smiling and being thankful vastly preferable to the flip side of the attitude coin. ;)
 Maria11418
Joined: 3/14/2017
Msg: 212
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 9:56:44 PM

not spending one dollar towards a date

I'm sorry... did you notice the list of dishes she makes for men to take home? Let's calculate how much all those ingredients, and her work, cost... a lot more than a couple of drinks and bad fries at an Irish pub.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 213
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 10:02:27 PM
Her posting history
https://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts16626339.aspx
Check Msg: 206
She's All about money
I cook for myself and others...no big deal really...cooked for my ex

Did the guy pay for the food she cooked? did she get him to go shopping and pay for it?
 Maria11418
Joined: 3/14/2017
Msg: 214
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 10:36:09 PM

Did the guy pay for the food she cooked? did she get him to go shopping and pay for it?

From her posts, it doesn't sound like he had to pay for that, no. Cooking is expensive business overall... I'm on the simple side of cooking and don't hide it... it's cheaper and healthier most of the time. I remember volunteering to bring a tray of baked ziti to a party... it came out good but I remember how much I had to pay for ricotta cheese alone... and you need a lot of that for a tray of baked ziti... that was just one ingredient. I admire women who cook complicated dishes for the hell of it... to me, it's an ordeal and a money drain that's no joke. (Tomorrow's dinner will be beef tongue, potatoes with sour cream and salad.)
 GWSmith
Joined: 12/18/2008
Msg: 215
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 11:18:03 PM
Chivalry was a code of conduct for ancient barbaric people who viewed women as lesser beings to men. It only really advocated for the gentle treatment of women because they were thought of as thoughtless creatures who acted simply based on their emotions at the time and in order to keep them calm and docile they needed to be treated with kid gloves. Until they were your wife anyway. Then they might as well have been your property and you could treat them how you wanted.

Turns out knights in shining armor were really just hired killers.

Equality is better, I treat women the way I treat anyone else... with the respect and dignity their person hood deserves as long as I am afforded the same.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 216
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Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/3/2017 11:55:34 PM
Thank you, Maria! I see you understand me. Yes, I do pay for the food myself. I do the inviting and I pay for that date. I have to admit, I do love to cook, so it's not a big chore for me, but at the same time, it is time consuming from the grocery shopping, to cooking, serving and cleaning. Definitely, it's better than the food I'll eat out with casual dining on a date. I do enjoying cooking and entertaining, but don't do it all the time, so I don't look at the cost. It's nice to do something for a guy that he may not do for himself and totally enjoy.

Also, I know how expensive it is to make pasta like you did. Those ingredients are expensive, especially since it's for a large amount of people. I've made baked ziti for a date also.
 Laidbackguy1964
Joined: 4/20/2017
Msg: 217
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 5:57:16 AM
NewYorker58, How many dates would you require a guy to pay for, before you offered to cook for him at your place? Do you pick the restaurants the guys take you to? Do you require the guy to give your fuel money, before the date proceeds?
What do you consider cheap? What do you consider fair?
 Jackcrusto
Joined: 2/27/2017
Msg: 218
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 6:42:12 AM

NewYorker58, How many dates would you require a guy to pay for, before you offered to cook for him at your place? Do you pick the restaurants the guys take you to? Do you require the guy to give your fuel money, before the date proceeds?
What do you consider cheap? What do you consider fair?


Look dude STFU already and get off that woman's azz. I mean really if it's been working for I believe I read 50 years for her what makes you think she gives a sh!t what you think about it dude? Please just quit dude. Why do any of you people even bother with Laidbackguy1964? Dude is a troll of all trolls.
 Nestaron
Joined: 3/22/2016
Msg: 219
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 9:54:48 AM
When a lady says she is making a home cook meal the guy should offer to bring or buy something she needs it shouldn't be a attack on a woman. Who raised those type of guys? I get invited to person's house for dinner, immediately say "do you need anything" "how can I help and contribute" home cooked meals can be expensive depending what they are, if she is a single mother more burdensome, and you're out already offer to chip in. I have been cooked a few home meals and brought supplies, dessert, side dishes, it's nothing in dollars to help a woman show she appreciates you with a nice meal. I would rather bring all the supplies then pay for a restaurant, gas, parking, drinks and time lost to get there.

Nit-picking is what a cheapskate does, not a man who is about equality, or argues equal rights for men then want women to cater to their azz in dollars, service, time. That's no where near equal no matter who you are, show your equality and offer to help.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 220
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Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 11:14:57 AM
I wish someone warned me about him before I started responding, lol.

Nestaron, I'm okay with buying the groceries. If the man wanted to come over every day for a home-cooked meal, then that would be something else.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 221
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 12:19:01 PM
"Chivalry was a code of conduct for barbaric people"

>>>who bathed once a month in water that got so dirty we get the saying about throwing babies out in bathwater too dark to see thru

"who viewed women as lesser begins, who acted on their emotions"

>>and like the "parfait gentle knicht", was likely the age of a young adult. They all court like dramatic teens b/c they likely were.

"They needed to be treated with kid gloves"

>>when their grandchildren would grow to wear whalebone corsets, no wonder they swooned in the heat.

"until they were your wife and your property and you could do as you pleased"

>>>the "rule of thumb" originally had to do with how thick a rod you could whip your wife with. Thicker than your thumb was considered abusive.

"turns out knights in shining armour were really just hired killers"

>>and why they were sent on quests or jousted in tournaments. Otherwise, like ronin, they went and picked on the serfs growing the king's wheat.

Equality is great for those who are looking for it. Two people can pair well together when they share a sentiment about roles in society.


"Who raised these guys?"

>>>the answer to that....might explain where their view of women comes from.
 meowzing
Joined: 4/27/2017
Msg: 222
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 12:31:57 PM
"Who raised these guys?"
>>>the answer to that.....might explain where their view of women comes from.

^ Amen to that.
 forumslady
Joined: 12/7/2016
Msg: 223
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 3:49:44 PM
NewYorker58- Ignore him. He started in with me and I engaged for a bit, then I just said to heck with it.
All of us have something going on. I don't care who tries to deny it, but that guy is on another level, don't let him get to you.
I also enjoy cooking.
There's something in the process that's relaxing to me. Better yet, it goes to what you are talking about.
Cooking isn't just about feeding someone, it's an expression of caring, of doing something for someone else that makes them smile and you do too because you made another person happy.
Clearly, there are people in the world that don't get the concept of finding joy in providing other people with kindness and a part of yourself.
Those are the best cooks, the one's that love it so much it's practically a part of their DNA.
I hope it doesn't seem like bragging, but I'm told by a lot of people I'm that good.
All of my children know how to cook, my oldest son, in fact, is a professional chef.
Anyway, I don't know why some people get so up in arms about what other people do in a relationship.
I like giving advice as much as anyone here, it's kind of addictive, but I try to be understanding.
Really, what you are expressing is your love language, it's how you show someone that you care for them.
Someone who has a different love language isn't wrong, they are just different.
The key is finding matching love languages.
Don't apologize any more to that cretin, or try to explain yourself.
If it works for you and it makes the other person happy, that's a win, win, so keep doing what works. :)
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 224
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History
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 4:17:41 PM
Thank you, FM! My mom said that's one way she showed us kids she loved us, thru her cooking. I started cooking when I was 7, even invited a friend home from school at lunchtime to cook for her.

I'm done with LBG after he equated being taken out on a date with prostitution, LOL!!!! Calling women prostitutes for accepting a date is over the top. I feel bad for him.....in a way. As you say, we all have our "things", but there's no getting around that attitude. He probably doesn't mind the negative attention and thrives off of it. That kind of attention can be very lonely though.

MEOW, you would be correct, partially. Women tend to raise the kids and they are partially responsible for how their male children turn out with their attitudes. A male child does imprint from how he sees his father, so a big part of that is the father. I kind of put a lot of this on the mother, though. She can try to straighten her kid out from what he may see the father do if the father isn't great, but that's not always easy.
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 225
Equality & Chivalry. Feminism & Femininity. Man & Gentleman
Posted: 6/4/2017 6:49:58 PM
just an FYI, if you done with LBG then you done with a couple
for whatever reason some ppl here have more than one profile
Just had the best ice cream ever. Limited edition so I have to clear the freezer to stock up
Key Lime pie
Bits of pie dough
I will be fat but full
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