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 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 226
speaking of going downhill :)Page 10 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

Pig, you need to hang with a better class of woman.


How would you know what "class" of women I hang out with? I was speaking of the women who undeniably exist in this world, and how I don't allow them to become a part of mine.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 227
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speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/6/2017 2:33:24 PM

My ex was a gift to me (and to each other) when we met and married. We each made each other's lives better, until it stopped working.


Don't you just hate when people stop working?

And there's no warranty either.


Another word could be "special". A person could use that word negatively too, if they wanted to.


Well, isn't that "special"?-(Church Lady voice)


Go out with someone you mesh with,


After all this time, an easy answer for it all.
Who knew?


a better class of woman.


Needle in a haystack.


I believe a guy should contact a lot of woman,


Yes, because all that rejection will build character.

Or crush one's soul.

I have enough character for 3 lifetimes.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 228
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/6/2017 2:42:30 PM
I'll confess, some have sounded a bit more MWGTOW lately in their posts. Maybe they've had recent misfortune in dating, maybe its always been an abstract thought in their head and they finally found the words, maybe its some other coincidence. I have a lifetime of practice at learning i'm not everyone's cup of tea. So perhaps practice has made perfect. It must be harder for those who grew up being most people's tall drink of water, and then getting older and finding that things have changed. Like a child who begins hearing the word "no". Its not fun, but we learn we can't always have every candy bar.

"first class is there to remind you, you're not there yet"

>>>I love it. There used to be another investor ad, a picture of a bear standing next to a rapid in a stream, ready to catch a trout flying thru the air, and the caption was, "in these times, you may think you're the bear. We'd like to point out, you may be the fish". Or maybe its a take-off of the bumpersticker, "some people's purpose in life is to be an example to others" Its all cynical, but still amusing to those with the confidence to laugh at their own shortcomings. As for taglines, I remember those, and after getting into a debate with someone over whether or not a certain engine could get great gas mileage (he thought no, b/c he was a "professional engine builder", while I said march down to your Chevrolet dealership, they are doing it with the new Corvette, argue with that evidence) I made my tagline "Just b/c you can't do it, doesn't make it impossible for others".

Taglines were great, it showed off intelligence and creativity. Even if you copied someone else's famous quote, it showed you were capable of conscious thought. we should have 'em here, except some would get dirty quick.

can we predict what type of partner some people chase after? sometimes we can. If a person complains that all men are X, we may wonder if they keep being attracted to that type of man, and suggest they need to figure out they are the constant. Or someone might say they are only looking for one type of relationship, and we may decide that only one type of human is also looking for that type of relationship. We might decide that someone's parameters are so narrow, they are destined to fail. and so on.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 229
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History
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/6/2017 4:12:11 PM

How are you doing with stopping smoking? You don't sound cranky☺


Two weeks in, still sticking with it. Fighting off the urges get easier every day. Then I got curious- What's my blood pressure?
115/70.
That I didn't expect to happen that quick. Most that I read about stopping, all said that blood pressure would go down. Mine wasn't that high. Makes me wonder where I'll be in a couple months.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 230
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speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/6/2017 7:44:48 PM

Pig, it has nothing to do with jumping thru hoops.

The Hoops, Hurdles, whatever you want to call them - exist in the virtual world. And they are VERY prominent. The Search Preferences and Mail Settings we put into these dating profiles are mechanically controlled and sorted by a number or yes/no value. There isn't a preference for something in a gray area. The software is only capable of making a limited number of choices - no matter which website you use. Sure, it does randomize results to include a few from outside the portal of possibility we draw up, but for the most part, those statistics 'lock our luck' trying to find people in here.

Humans in the real world definitely have the ability to think outside the box, and to search there, too - but for the most part, while online - we don't exercise that muscle to any real extent. Our soft profile 'preferences' turn into solid barriers, rules, walls, hoops, hurdles - because we don't take the action to CHANGE them. God forbid we actually, deliberately change up our search prefs to look for someone fatter, shorter, dumber (education) and see what pops up.

I have a friend (who is now married) that was an excellent, attractive specimen online a few years ago - an obvious target for daily messaging from guys. When she wanted to take a break, changing her body type to 'BBW' or replacing the lead photo with something fuzzy would make the online attention virtually disappear. Conversely, short guys lying about their height gets more 'viewed' hits than they EVER would if they left it alone at below-average. Big deal if the people read their profile and figure out something is fake - at least someone is READing it.

People always have the right to change their mind, and do - but those online software settings are very much the gatekeeper, the bouncer at the front door. You have NO idea who is waiting outside the club unless you step out there and look. It IS a hurdle to find someone online willing to stretch their age range, or physical prefs, or go around their listed things that 'must be' to have a match. Attraction simply cannot happen if you are not even aware of their existence. People can claim all they want to be 'open minded' and even prove that from time to time they DO change their searches around a bit -- but for the great majority in here - they set it, and forget it - and don't change a thing unless they believe it's a guarantee for the better.
 Strawberry_Jello
Joined: 5/13/2014
Msg: 231
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History
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/6/2017 8:40:40 PM
I searched with all kinds of different parameters. Didn't make much difference. I'm a few pounds overweight, so I tried looking for and contacting big men. Didn't help, they rejected me just as often as average guys. I tried contacting shorter men, thinking they would be more responsive, but no. I was open minded in my searches and messaging, it didn't help, until someone I thought wasn't my type contacted me, and I answered him.
I answered him despite a laughably bad photo. I answered because his message was polite and sincere. I thought he lived too far away. The polite and sincere message worked.
He doesn't meet the criteria I had in mind. We don't match in politics, although we are not opposites. But we do lots of things together. We have been together for almost 2 years now. So, yes, I recommend being more openminded. Trouble is, that takes 2 people to be openminded. But if someone contacts you, and you are thinking, "I don't think so", maybe you could give them a chance.
I met several men from OLD, we had things in common, we met and had a good time together, talking, laughing, on a first meet. Then they didn't want a 2nd date. Seemed silly to me, we had a good time, why not do it again? But people are being too uptight about it. When we met people IRL, I think we gave it more time.
Anyway, good luck everybody.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 232
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speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/7/2017 12:42:46 AM
Mustang, my Mustang gets a whopping 31 city (19 hwy). I like cars from the 50s. I can see myself tooling around in this: http://www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/ford-thunderbird-convertible-royalty-free-image/534567188 Or, I would LOVE this car!!!! http://www.glenrock59.com/000/9/9/0/11099/userfiles/image/_Ford_1957_Thunderbird.jpg

Pig, it's hard for me to relate to this jumping thru the hoop thing, because it doesn't apply to me or my friends. I do wonder exactly what hoops women want men to jump thru? That's what I mean by better class of women. I don't know these women that you seem to know, but avoid.

Purple, what you're doing is amazing to just go cold turkey like that and ace it. I think your blood pressure is good where it is. I don't think it would be good to go any lower. Maybe you'll stabilize where you're at now. I'd keep an eye on it.

Strawberry, sounds like you've got a good thing going on!
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 233
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/7/2017 5:35:03 AM
The search parameters are a limit...sometimes. Which is why people experienced in OLD say it shouldn't be a primary source for dating. Around here, I've looked at hottie profiles with all sorts of restrictions that claimed, "i'm back here again", which means that with all those restrictions...they still found a partner they were willing to try out. They could afford to be that picky. IRL, I've also met women who wouldn't give me the time of day until they got introduced to me by a friend, and next thing I know, they're treating me as a friend, swapping recipes, inviting me over to watch movies, etc. IOW, we don't always just use a computer to weed out all the people trying to contact us. Still, for those who find the restrictions don't work for them...they eventually lower their standards. Around here I label it the "winter effect", when no one wants to go out in the snow to the clubs, the beaches are closed...and if you're stressed out and can't wait a few months for summer and want a warm body now, you look around people you encounter daily. The recipients probably call it "getting lucky" for good reason :)

NY, that's decent gas mileage (my huge 7.5 litre gets over 15mpg, for reference), I once coasted my 5.0 litre V8 down some steep hills and pulled a ridiculous 30mpg (did the math twice, couldn't believe it). Living out here in the sticks as a kid, sometimes we could get a vehicle on the road that didn't belong there (my father once bought wheels for his sunflower sailboat and took that out on our backroad), so when he had a 1957 Thunderbird, I got to run that as a kid. The original Thunderbirds made any pastel color look awesome. The technology back then was amazing, the country/town radio would raise its volume as speed increased, could pull a signal depending on whether you were out in the countryside or amongst the buildings...and we think of them as archaic. Tho, vacuum powered windshield wipers were deadly when you needed to pass a car.

Purple, good for you. My father gave up cigs for my first birthday, and he went cold turkey as well. Super low blood pressure is a double edged sword. Any doctor who got a BP cuff on him sent him to the hospital, sure he was going to keel over on the walk to the car. on the flip side, it likely kept his aneurysm from growing, which was a good thing since his GP forgot it was there for 10 years, until low BP send my father tumbling after he rose from the toilet and caved his eyebrow into his sinuses...and then the doc called me at 7pm the next night to apologize for not keeping track. Ah, the medical profession.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 234
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/7/2017 5:52:12 AM


Pig, it's hard for me to relate to this jumping thru the hoop thing, because it doesn't apply to me or my friends.


Really? So, you've never had the expectation or desire for good old fashioned "chivalry" before? Now, before you can go off on a rant, being a complete d*ckhead to a woman isn't the only alternative. I don't consider well mannered and chivalrous to be exactly synonymous.

I should also make it clear that I am not someone with a litany of relationship horror stories. In fact, overall, the vast majority of the women were good people, but harbored typical female traits I couldn't agree or live with, therefore long term relationships don't work for me.
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 235
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/7/2017 6:24:45 AM
Flannery O Connor's short story "Good Country People" comes to mind.. lol quite an enjoyable read..
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 236
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speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/7/2017 4:02:45 PM
Mustang, I didn't want to get all motherly with Purple, I know he doesn't need it or want it, but that was the thought that came to mind, getting dizzy, because I know he can be on ladders and on roofs.

Pig, the question would be, what's goes under the title of chivalry and what's normal gentlemen behavior. I never really thought about it. There could be crossover. It's hard for me to think about what men may do since I was married for so long and he didn't put himself out for me.

Pulling out a chair, I don't look for that. Holding open a door, men tend to do that. You could call it being polite, but men tend to do that for women, or at least men in my life have. I kind of like that. They reach ahead of you, I don't stand there waiting for them to do it. Opening a car door, it's a rarity, especially with car door openers, which may have been one reason men did that before they were prevalent. I don't look for that to be done. I'm shocked when a guy does that. Pulling the car around when it's raining or snowing or super cold, I appreciate that and most men offer to do that. I walk in the elements while hiking, but when I'm going out, I'd like to look okay when I arrive someplace. I'm more apt to say no need to pull the car around when I'm leaving someplace to go home.

Lets face it, men are bigger than us. I would expect a guy would offer assistance with something that required strength beyond what I have. I think everyone needs to do what they can for each other in areas where a s/o falls short. Things have changed a lot already over the years. I had a potential worker come to my house and say ooops, he almost say the F word. It used to be, men didn't say curse words in "mixed" company. It may have had more to do with my being a client and it not being professional, but it made me think about how men would not curse in front of women. I told him, it's okay, we use the F word a lot in NY:)
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 237
speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/10/2017 10:20:37 AM

Lets face it, men are bigger than us.
New yorker this may be your experience.. not mine.
yes many men, have more upper body strength, while many women, tend to have more lower body strength, . A male tendency towards short term stress capabilities and spatial planning, and force; offering immediate resolution, whereas a female tendency towards long term stress capabilities, stamina utilizing communication solutions. However, these may be psychological evolutionary, responses, and biological, evolutionary responses, affixed to long held societal roles and adjustment to such.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 238
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One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/10/2017 7:14:53 PM
I fail to see how any of this chivalry vs normal vs any other demonstrable behavior comes to play in a one-liner message, which is what the gist if this thread is all about. Where does this magic happen? It's the idea that people assume the future based on the most minimal of data. How the hell can a guy hold a door open or pull out a chair if the first date is a mutual drive-up and meet-up? How can a single sentence first message EVER verify the character of a person further down the line? This whole discussion is putting the cart ahead of the horse.

I hold doors open all the time for strangers. I don't need credit for being chivalrous. But in doing so, the reactions are wide and varied. Some pat me on the shoulder/back and thank me - others look terrified, like they don't want this strange man walking behind them at all - others stop and hold the door for me and insist I go first. Being gentlemanly isn't just about the action itself - it's how others choose to perceive it.

People create their own destiny. Assumptions made online are always lingering at a first meet - pretty much as a line to meet or exceed - and it really doesn't matter if it's realistic. All this crap about being a gentleman doesn't come into play - it's a delusion created by words, not by what has actually happened, and obviously, not by what hasn't happened yet. We are 'slotted' to be a specific type of person in their eyes, and what happens in real life sometimes doesn't even matter - because they would rather be ignorant than wrong.

Just saw a Toyota commercial about athletes - the key tagline was...
"They think they know you. Go show them what they don't know."

God, I wish it was that easy. But so many would rather leave a game at halftime to avoid the slightest amount of difficulty exiting than stay and see how it really ends.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 239
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speaking of going downhill :)
Posted: 9/10/2017 8:47:50 PM

yes many men, have more upper body strength, while many women, tend to have more lower body strength, .



How could that be if men have more testosterone?



A male tendency towards short term stress capabilities and spatial planning, and force; offering immediate resolution, whereas a female tendency towards long term stress capabilities, stamina utilizing communication solutions.



Lots of men like a quick resolution and to move on instead of going on and on and on about it without a resolution.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 240
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/11/2017 5:37:01 AM
"yes many men, have more upper body strength, while many women, tend to have more lower body strength"

>>>then someone should invent a self defense program that complies with lower center of gravity, using hips and leg muscles in throws and manipulation.

"how can a single first message sentence ever convey the character of a person?"

>>>it begins with a sentence that shows the sender read the profile, "gets" the person, and isn't a fill-in-the-blank, low effort job. The first step is to not ask to be deleted. Obviously, if your opening sentence is attached to an attractive photo...she's going to be interested in looking into your further.
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 241
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/11/2017 8:21:17 AM
yes wrestling running , many martial arts self defense programs exist for women's special needs(lol stating the obvious implied by Go) in protecting selves from usually stronger opponents- whom may choose a smaller weaker opponent to assault and overpower.- best leveling defense a capability to fire and skill training for correctly handling a firearm.

oh my-- testosterone- progesterone- estrogen all have all -and all are integral to maintain health and well being throughout life- different hormone production have pros and cons for both sexes. The differences in upper and lower body strength arise during sexual maturation, women tend to have a wider hip base, men tend to have larger shoulder and rib cage, that is where the tendencies arise. Developing said muscle formation, depends upon exercise expelled in developing muscular support. Many men who work out can develop extremely strong legs muscles and many women who work out can develop extremely strong upper body strength. Both can change their comparisons to the average musculature for men and women. As I stated it is a tendency.

i did not insult men or women techniques of resolution i posed an observation.- clearly assuming and insinuating women go on and on without reaching a resolution is derogatory. i never said men or women did not resolve issues. What was your agenda behind such an inflammatory comment?
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 242
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/11/2017 3:04:43 PM
Women on average do not have more lower body strength than men. I think the relative difference in lower body strength between men and women is smaller compared to the upper body. But men still have the edge.

http://www.livestrong.com/article/422532-do-women-have-more-lower-body-strength-than-men/
https://femuscleblog.wordpress.com/2016/03/23/do-women-have-stronger-legs-and-more-lower-body-strength-than-men/
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 243
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/11/2017 4:53:09 PM
" You must focus on heavy, compound exercises that build strength and train with lower repetitions. Given consistent training, you can close the gender gap with respect to strength limits."http://www.livestrong.com/article/422532-do-women-have-more-lower-body-strength-than-men/
thank you for correcting my outdated knowledge of men and women's professed strengths. The article actually reflects that the weakness of women's lower body is more pronounced ,presently, in relation to men's lower body strength ,than upper body strength differences. evolutionary results are supported/concurred with in the conclusion of the article. many record holders are being challenged.As we learn more and more about the gaps, and how to address them we shall see increased skill, proficiency at physical strength and stamina in sports for both men and women . Men have the edge- if we consider it battle or competition-to be winners and losers-which i do not- i expressed a firearm levels the playing field in said competition or battle for physical domination or power- defense and stand by this.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 244
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One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/12/2017 1:37:05 PM

But men still have the edge.


True.

Show me an athletic world record where the woman's record is superior to the man's record.

The fastest woman's 100 meter record is not faster than the man's.

The fastest woman's marathon record is not faster than the man's.

Pole vault, discus, javelin, high jump, long jump, etc. Same results.
 MsSkeezix
Joined: 7/1/2017
Msg: 245
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/12/2017 2:40:24 PM
^^^

But men still have the edge.


True.

Show me an athletic world record where the woman's record is superior to the man's record.

The fastest woman's 100 meter record is not faster than the man's.

The fastest woman's marathon record is not faster than the man's.

Pole vault, discus, javelin, high jump, long jump, etc. Same results.


We love it when you guys show off for us! ;-)
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 246
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/12/2017 2:56:28 PM
::flexes and gyrates pelvis::
 MsSkeezix
Joined: 7/1/2017
Msg: 247
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/12/2017 3:09:58 PM

::flexes and gyrates pelvis::


Eyes wide, Oh My--- ;-)
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 248
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One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/12/2017 6:41:06 PM
Lower extremity strength is talked about in women, because a woman's legs are going to be more powerful to be used in her defense than her arm strength. If a woman knows how to defend herself, then there are certain moves a woman can do that don't involve physical strength that involve the martial arts. Or, a woman can carry a gun like I can in Washington State, and have her ccp like I do, but it's still good to know some martial arts moves.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 249
One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/13/2017 3:34:09 AM


but it's still good to know some martial arts moves.


It's not that simple. You can't just take a few women's self-defense courses to "learn a few moves" and you're all set. The unfortunate truth is, no matter what "moves" they learn, in a real life attack on the streets, most women panic and everything they learned goes right out the window. Most of the courses also leave many elements of a real life attack out of the equation.

I've sat in on a few of these courses before and was outraged by some of the bullshit I heard from the instructors. I heard one instructor claim "most male attackers won't actually hit a woman." Are you f*cking kidding me? Anytime you are attacked on the street, you need to be of the mind your attacker is capable of anything, including killing you.
 zsuzsa62
Joined: 1/31/2016
Msg: 250
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One-Liner does not a relationship make
Posted: 9/13/2017 4:57:36 AM
^^^^^^^
That's what I ended up experiencing taking a set of three self defence courses. Some of the moves made sense...like getting out of a hold but you'd have to practice them a whole lot to remember what to do and I think I'd probably panic.
One move was to pinch and twist the skin at the back of the arm or inner thigh. I tried it on a male friend because he said it sounded dumb and even pinching hard, he ended up laughing.
Anyway, on the last day we had to run at a box (with a man sketched on it) with our brooms we'd brought. I thought my broom was especially effective because it had the end off and was kind of sharp. I ran at my box which was up against the gym wall and it went through and into the wall behind and I dislocated my shoulder. Very painful. I think that's all my two friends remember about the whole course. Now I have a bum shoulder.
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