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 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 71
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Chapster
"I went to Oban many (about 40) years ago, had fish n chips there on the promenade. Highly amusing as the choice was trout, salmon or cod! Tried the Irn Bru too - errr?
I'm from Merseyside and my mate keeps telling me that they always have chips and gravy there and I keep telling him not, or at least when I lived there 40 years ago. Am going back next month, will see if things have changed."

Now chips and a wee bit gravy is ok. Edible and comforting. BUT

I need to take you to task over your dissing our irn bru. I accuse you of lack of taste buds and indeed you come from the nation that foisted Dandelion and Burdock on us. I mean............ c'mon mate.

I remember when i was graftin in london. A lot of the irish lads requested we bring back plain bread, slice sausage and red kola juice. Many a friend was made when you brought the red kola on site.

Dandelion and burdock. Tsk.
 Jacknher
Joined: 3/16/2017
Msg: 72
football teams
Posted: 8/17/2017 12:32:19 PM
I had Oz relatives over here a few times and always make sure they get some proper fish n chips.

They are always very suspicious of the brown vinegar though. Some takeaways over there so have a bottle of vinegar on the counter.....but it's always white vinegar so they look at the brown vinegar here like we might trying to poison them.

First time in a takeaway over there I looked at the menu and ordered Scallops and chips......expecting seafood and chips. But scallops over there are slices of potato dipped in batter and deep fried....so I ended up with potato and potato for lunch.

They don't do Dandelion and Burdock or Irn Bru over there but do do Sarsaparilla and Creaming Soda.
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 73
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Posted: 8/18/2017 2:51:45 AM
Yep, my Mum used to do scallops or scalloped potatoes as i think most people would call them now. How anyone could possibly sprinkle white vinegar on their chips! Heathens.
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 74
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Posted: 8/18/2017 5:50:43 AM
Jackn
"They don't do Dandelion and Burdock or Irn Bru over there but do do Sarsaparilla and Creaming Soda"

We get cream soda. Made by the same outfit who make irn bru. Speaking of irn bru (made in Scotland from girders) ordering a girders was popular in the boozers for a while. Vodka and irn bru.

Never tried the dandelion and burdock. No sure how it tastes. Ive heard of sasparrilla (spl) before in a song i think.

But irn bru was famous also for its adverts. They were really good and witty. Made by Leith advertising i think. The youtube clip below has 15 of their adverts on it. Number 14 got withdrawn after some complaints were nade by some snowflakes.

Have a wee gander. You might get a wee chuckle at some of them.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=JOGIQVlIduw
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 76
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Posted: 8/18/2017 7:23:24 AM
I'm half deaf so missed most of the words. Loved the one where the family is singing around the piano and the Mum sings "though I used to be a man". And the young girl who manages to push her bloke around the tree branch, think she said "flip". And I liked the recurring them of the Irn Bru dispenser giving out the Glaswegian Kiss foc.
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 78
football teams
Posted: 8/18/2017 10:18:35 AM
Those Irn Bru ads are bloody brilliant. I love the dark humour....is that typical Scot's humour - very dark?

If it is typical, it's mad how deceptive the Scot's soft accent and general gentleness is....I did not realise that such dementedness lay beneath those innocent looking exteriors.

My favourite one was the butcher getting the cartoon animals to follow him to his shop...the visual jokes throughout were just so clever. My second favourite was the flying through the air one. I love cartoons ...


Really bizarre

Someone just sent me their phone number and talked about our future together

What kind of future was he envisioning?
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 80
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Posted: 8/18/2017 11:29:57 AM
Well folks as humour is the name of the thread recently here are the best jokes from the fringe 2017.....

Robert Garnham:
Insomnia is awful. But on the plus side – only three more sleeps till Christmas.

Dan Antopolski:
Centaurs shop at Topman. And Bottomhorse.

Paul Savage:
Oregon leads America in both marital infidelity and clinical depression. What a sad state of affairs.

Caroline Mabey:
I’m very conflicted by eye tests. I want to get the answers right but I really want to win the glasses.

Athena Kugblenu:
Relationships are like mobile phones. You’ll look at your iPhone 5 and think, it used to be a lot quicker to turn this thing on.

Evelyn Mok:
My vagina is kind of like Wales. People only visit ironically.

Phil Wang:
In the bedroom, my girlfriend really likes it when I wear a suit, because she’s got this kinky fantasy where I have a proper job.

Gráinne Maguire:
The Edinburgh fringe is such a bubble. I asked a comedian what they thought about the North Korea nuclear missile crisis and they asked what venue it was on in.

John-Luke Roberts:
How did the Village People meet? They obviously led such different lives.

Olaf Falafel:
If you’re being chased by a pack of taxidermists, do not play dead
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 82
football teams
Posted: 8/18/2017 2:39:36 PM
I got distracted there looking at videos on youtube....was having a look at old Richard Harris interviews which were full of stories of him and Peter O'Toole's drunken misadventures, so funny.

Anyway, I say have a gin vodka (the two of them together in the same glass?) and a San Miguel ....get yourself blotto!
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 84
football teams
Posted: 8/18/2017 3:20:37 PM
Oh dear, I hope it doesn't go on for too long....They've started early, haven't they?

Where I live ...the majority of houses are lived in by quiet folks like myself. But there was this one time the football club across the road invited a Palestinian boys team to play against locals their age....it was upsetting to notice that the boys from here were all head and shoulders above the boys from Gaza.

In honor of their guests, the club played Arabic music really loudly...it was a shock to be woken up by earth-shatteringly loud belly- dancing music so early on a Sunday. They came back this year and there was no music this time around...some bollocks must have complained.

So yeah...I feel for ya!
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 86
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Posted: 9/4/2017 2:41:11 PM
I will just leave this here ..... Leeds United


I told you so ..... you read it here first - PL Champions in the next few years!
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 87
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Posted: 9/6/2017 6:29:06 AM
The guys in the next door unit used to be leeds supporters but then they found it embarrassing when they found themselves turning having to watch at Cheltenham Town!
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 88
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Posted: 9/6/2017 6:29:22 AM
The guys in the next door unit used to be leeds supporters but then they found it embarrassing when they found themselves turning having to watch at Cheltenham Town!
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 89
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Posted: 9/6/2017 8:46:10 AM
Chapster. How goes it geezer?

Did you see this on the news today? The french wifey who stopped a game? Lol worth a gander on the link to see the photies mate. It mentions cloggers so leeds could be thought of as well........

"Annoyed with the amount of footballs landing in her back garden, a French woman took a stand – and got the match called off.

An amateur level match between Juillan III and Tarbes FC in the Hautes-Pyrenees region of France was called to a halt in the 65th minute on Sunday when a local woman took her deckchair straight onto the pitch and refused to move.

Her protests worked – the match had to be completely abandoned 45-minute negotiations between the neighbour and match officials.

But will it be enough to stop footballs landing in her garden? Sorry, Madame: not even a frustrating postponement can stop a Sunday League clogger from skewing another shot high and wide."
https://www.fourfourtwo.com/features/amateur-french-game-abandoned-after-woman-stages-garden-related-sit-down-protest#3IZhjYAUABvti0Yp.99
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 90
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Posted: 9/6/2017 9:16:26 AM
Good thanks Vlad. Just had a few days off Sunday Monday and Tuesday up in Liverpool. Lived on Merseyside until I was 28 and worked in Liverpool for a year or two. Stayed in a hotel right next to the Pier Head (departure for ferry cross the Mersey and emigrants to the states). I knew all the buildings but you never appreciate what's around you so going back with a gang of friends was great fun and an exploration, even though I twisted my knee badly. Liverpool's taxis are half the price they are here. Reccomend the open top bus tour, never knew Liverpool was so leafy though they missed out the grim bits to the west!
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 91
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Posted: 11/4/2017 10:49:28 PM
Ooooo one bladdered vladdie yesterday. We took full use of hospitality. My mate (who died twice when he had legionairs disease) guzzled 8 pints before the game started.

The wee lassie serving the table done sound. She got a bulls eye £'s for her sterling work. My mate whos birthday do is was never knew there were loads of lads in the iona bar as well. He was well made up.

£100 in bets and not a sausage. They never listened. I said we would score within the first 10 mins but i was cruelly ignored. Tsk.

But what about thus Pauline and Slicey. Partick fan thrown out of castle greyskull for having a Saltire!!!!!!!!!!

https://mobile.twitter.com/manpreet_ptfc/status/926879518807285767

Cannae be having rebellious Scots in the queens own stadium can we?
 Squareslice
Joined: 10/17/2016
Msg: 92
football teams
Posted: 11/5/2017 1:45:37 AM
fux ache.... that's utter keech, Vlad. At the Motherwell Rangers semi, I helped a dude wi 2 wee lads spread out a huge mahoosive Motherwell flag rather than tell him tae get tae eff. That banner was rather huge.... took up a rather large amount of seats in the south stand ffs. After the match, he hunted me down to thank me cos he was actually in the east stand n it was me that got him n his kids in to the south to lay it out. Lovely family.
Us stewards are not there to give grief.... we're customer support.


Pauline.... it has to be Irn Bru extra.... sugar free wi all the taste

Oi, Vlad.... I'm workin in Embra for the lights goin on.... a day shift at light night ha ha.... fancy a beer on the 19th?
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 93
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Posted: 11/5/2017 1:23:43 AM
Slicey
"fux ache.... that's utter keech, Vlad. At the Motherwell Rangers semi, I helped a dude wi 2 wee lads spread out a huge mahoosive Motherwell flag rather than tell him tae get tae eff. That banner was rather huge.... took up a rather large amount of seats in the south stand ffs. After the match, he hunted me down to thank me cos he was actually in the east stand n it was me that got him n his kids in to the south to lay it out. Lovely family.
Us stewards are not there to give grief.... we're customer support."

The stewards at Castle Greyskull are terrible. When we go there we get pelted with coins, pies and cups of piss. The polis just stand and watch and tell us to fvck off back to Edinburgh.

Cannae do the 19 th mate. I'm over in Belfast that weekend. But catch up one time we shall for a few jars.
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 96
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Posted: 11/6/2017 12:54:53 PM
Pauline
You getting your ticket for the final then? Hope yous put them too the sword. Maybe see you on the telly guzzlin a macaroni pie?

Anyway? This fascinating documentary below is from 1974. It was made for German tv. It's about the ugly sisters at greyskull and darkheid but it's the footage which is interesting.

Slicey
The footage from planet weege in the 70's is fantastic. Skinner jeans and DM's. Worth a watch mate.

Willie Waddell the hun manager talking matter of factly about geezers going home to beat up the wife.

Some good photies and footage of the irish who came to the weege during and after the famine.

Jimmy reid makes some great points regarding football being the only identity the working class have. Talking about work and poverty (a lots changed since then eh?) and souless town centres.

Cliff hanley ripping both ugly sisters a new arse. And his comments are true. The orcs of greyskull are not a protestant club. They are an anti catholic club. And the plastic paddies are not a catholic club. They are an irish club.

He also tells what most of the orcs do not know. The catholic church were behind william of orange as he overthrew the stuart dynasty.

And , first time ive ever seen this footage. The game where celtic keeper johnny thompson was killed by a late tackle. The tackle is there to see on the footage.

All in all a brilliant time capsule...........

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=19j95pGNzI8
 vlad dracul
Joined: 4/30/2009
Msg: 98
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Posted: 11/23/2017 10:28:51 PM
Pauline
So you all set for sunday then? Just watched the highlights from the weekends games. Yous looked well good against the mutton molestors. Moult is deffo worth a bet for first goal.

But the plastic paddies could go either way eh? The hiding they took against psg could work against them. If your lot steam into them right from the off.

Or else they might take the embarrassment of the paris pounding out on yous.

But good luck to yous anyway pal and i hope motherwell is bouncing that night.

I'm going for 3-2 well. Mainly because both sides can score goals. Moult for well and the griff for the plastics. And they have dembele as well.

I think moult will play a blinder. He's away at the end of the season eh? What better way than winning a trophy against the unbeaten plastics?

Stokesy done it for us against the orcs. Played out of his skin.

And no too many macaroni pies. (You i mean and no stokesy)

Chapster
Dear oh dear mate. The toffees took a hell of a beating at goodison last night did they no? Italian fitba was in the dolldrums for a while there but atalanta showed everton up last night big time.

Everton were all over the place.

Ps just noticed there were mentions of gin in earlier posts. I myself am a gin guzzler. But look what WE have.........

"Eden Mill have a brand new product coming out on Monday 27 November – ‘Glory Glory Hibernian Dry Gin’!

Supporters were invited to participate in an online Twitter competition where they were asked to Tweet their favourite memory of supporting Hibernian using the hashtag #HibsMemory and after high number of entries the two lucky winners were Mally Graveson and Lynsay MacDonald.

Mally and Lynsay were invited to Eden Mill’s newest venue, Blendworks at the Rusacks Hotel, St Andrews and working with their master distiller Neil, Dylan, John, Mally and Lynsay created the gin, choosing botanicals they thought were fitting to The Club and their own preference.

Named ‘Glory Glory Hibernian Dry Gin’, this spicy and citrus gin has notes of a tangy lime, ripe strawberry and black pepper. This gin has also been infused with grass from the Easter Road pitch giving it an added Hibernian flavour.

http://www.hibernianfc.co.uk/news/8145


 Squareslice
Joined: 10/17/2016
Msg: 100
football teams
Posted: 11/25/2017 2:26:54 PM
Ah've taken the morra off. Was a struggle gettin through my shift today. Got a dose o the Tex Ritters. Thank fook there's never extra time at rugby.... but whit a game!!!!

Funny how there's nae segregation at rugby n never any trouble.
 Squareslice
Joined: 10/17/2016
Msg: 101
football teams
Posted: 11/26/2017 9:14:18 AM
Nae luck the day, Pauline. Hope ye enjoyed the game anyway.

In order to maintain the highest quality forums you may feel free to offer some sympathy, but dinna even think about going daft on it.
This is mainly because the list of negative rules on this site make the old testament look like a pamphlet
 rekirked
Joined: 11/7/2017
Msg: 102
football teams
Posted: 3/12/2018 8:45:44 AM
Watching Jamie Carragher begging forgiveness for gobbing over a child is a new low.


On another note, the driver of the other vehicle is plainly breaking the law, whatever he sold that clip for must have been worth being prosecuted for dangerous driving.
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 103
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Posted: 3/12/2018 9:49:50 AM
Apparently they were in a traffic jam. The other guy kept driving up to Carragher and repeating the score. A certain amount of goading there to produce a reaction. Little bit of sympathy.
 Hotbeaching
Joined: 5/21/2017
Msg: 104
football teams
Posted: 3/12/2018 12:15:17 PM
What an idiot, turn the radio up and ignore.....
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 105
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Posted: 3/13/2018 4:17:01 AM
Well, if you watch and listen to the video, the yong daughter keeps asking her father to stop, saying "don't" any number of times. Clearly she believed her father was out of order. No excuse for Carragher but sounded like her fther was more interested in a result than his daughter's welfare.

p.s. does Saturday's result mean Big Sam has saved his job?
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