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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 251
Bear necessityPage 11 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
in certain relationship dynamics- metaphorically burn, leave ash as trace on forehead for reminders when looking in mirror!! I am not Stephen Kings "Firestarter"would never suggest starting a fire or burning anything but memories or to keep damage minimal of relationship dynamics. was not meant to be insensitive to world happenings, has no relationship whatsoever to literal fire.

yes uncontrollable literal fires, man made or otherwise are extremely disruptive and destructive to all life. hope efforts to contain and maintain damages, before all of north america, central america, south america are consumed, are successful.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 252
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Bear necessity
Posted: 9/3/2017 6:53:57 PM
The best part of hiking is getting into areas where there is no cell phone reception. Being landlocked on the beach where no one can get into it at high tide and it's just you and your tent is nirvana! Climbing sand ladders on the headlands to get around landlocked beaches is so much fun when there are sand ladders. Eating wild strawberries, salmon berries and blackberries and collecting mussels off the rocks on the beach at low tide, there's nothing like it. Watching the sunset beyond your campfire as it looks like it's submerging itself in the ocean, there's nothing like it. Waking up to see bald eagles fishing in the ocean and grabbing a fish and bringing it up onto a Haystak, there's nothing like it.
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 253
Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 7:42:30 AM
It does sound grand New Yorker!
Ms Skeet I had a book burning ritual of my own- much to family and friends disappointment and chagrin...some who felt it is a desecration to even mark in borders or over text for personal edification-I burned my most treasured books upon realizing they occupied too much physical space (could be replaced with different text), they were already printed in my mind and tenets in my heart - yes those lost much respect for me!!.. lol

Pig did you sleep through italian meal time-or was it kept in ice box as a doggy bag?? Did you tip the massage technician and chef appreciatively? lol

S&G
I love eating and storing meat provided through fishing and hunting-especially when i do not have to prepare it! cooking is not my forte!
 backcreek7
Joined: 12/2/2014
Msg: 254
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Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 8:57:12 AM
" cooking is not my forte "


^^^ same here Inicia ~ but ........


..................................... I can cook up ~ a mean grilled cheese ~ col
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 255
Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 9:46:40 AM


Pig did you sleep through italian meal time-or was it kept in ice box as a doggy bag?? Did you tip the massage technician and chef appreciatively? lol


The times I fell asleep she usually woke me up in some smart a$$ way. Ice cube on my back, cranking up loud music, and one time she bit my neck.

We only lasted 3 months, but it was interesting.
 PennyAnte
Joined: 4/17/2016
Msg: 256
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Hiking Sex.....
Posted: 9/4/2017 2:32:58 PM
So if you have sex with someone when you go hiking with them....are they LTR material?
 MsSkeezix
Joined: 7/1/2017
Msg: 257
Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 3:39:53 PM


rip it out and burn it


burn it? not brilliant, actually rather stupid, never start a fire in the bush and don't leave anyTHING behind ..ever


She was not starting random brush fires for god sake. I assume she had small campfires in designated pits, and when she had a chance she divested herself of the extra weight of the pages of the books she'd read and used them to start her campfire.

Get a grip.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 258
Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 3:54:43 PM
darn, you burned your treasured books...didn't have a friend to hand them to, so that the friend could learn what you learned? :)

cooking is great, except the logic that it takes 20 minutes to prepare what is consumed in 5 :)

is hiking partner sex an indicator of LTR? Well, if the protection got left behind at the cabin...it might have to be out of necessity :)
 _babblefish
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 259
Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 4:13:41 PM

She was not starting random brush fires for god sake. I assume she had small campfires in designated pits, and when she had a chance she divested herself of the extra weight of the pages of the books she'd read and used them to start her campfire.

Get a grip.


where do y'all hike south of the border, walmart parking lots? i stand by what i posted because humans are stupid
and extremely careless

you twat


* and who the hell burns their books, donate them
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 260
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Bear necessity
Posted: 9/4/2017 4:43:57 PM
Inicia, you didn't want to donate them? That's what I do at my local library. They have book sales and will use them to pay for various programs.

Hiker's credo......Pack in, pack out. Leave only footprints behind. I tend to Camp where few people go, so those hikers have more respect for the land. I have done Beach clean-ups where a lot of the mess is coming from the ocean onto the land from boats I guess. There's a lot of debris that comes in from the ocean.

Babble, If you're going on a steep hike or a long hike to camp, people can take just the chapters from a book they want to read or take a magazine and they can burn it in the campfire so they don't have to carry it out. Before you extinguish your morning campfire, you look around to see what you can burn so you don't have to pack it out with you and that is perfectly fine to do. Most people don't take reading material. You have a campfire and you're talking to whoever is with you and just enjoying being outdoors. No one likes to carry extra unneeded weight. Ultralight hikers will even cut the end off of their toothbrush not to have that extra weight and they look at every ounce they're carrying.

Penny, a lay on the beach really doesn't make that person more than just that, unless you want them to be something more to you.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 261
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 5:00:45 PM
"If you sleep with someone the first date, would you consider them LTR material? Or would it depend on many other factors? I'm interested in reading the male vs. female perspectives on this. Or maybe they'll be more similar than previously believed. "


It would all depend on what kind of hiking boots they wore
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 262
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 5:17:58 PM
^^^ Now I hear Joe C ocker singing 'you can leave your boots on.' :-/
 Ouija2025
Joined: 6/11/2014
Msg: 263
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 5:29:27 PM
Hat :)
So hat and boots Sunnie
Go watch tom jones do it
" hands grapefruit knife to a bestie"
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 264
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 5:52:11 PM
Yes, I replaced hat with boots. ;-) Either way is not a pleasant image.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 265
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 7:08:55 PM
Sun, oooh la la, isn't that a stripper song? I see how you think☺ https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VBXiEDI3G6g
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 266
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/4/2017 7:28:34 PM
Yes, unfortunately, that's how I think.


In order to maintain the highest quality forums you are restricted to leaving your hat on.

Since 2 of the last 10 posts are yours you can not post to this thread.
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 267
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/5/2017 10:39:02 AM
love you can leave your boots on..
grilled cheese with sharp cheddar or colby...out grew 'merican cheese or cheese food

I had given Omg probably 700#s of books donate-friends etc.. These were ones i had kept for self, like i said it was ritualistic. yes humans can be careless so lets remove all "discoveries Sic" industrial tech advancements, Stop producing forks and knives as often harm occurs with such- let's return to eating with hands and digging in earth with hands, no heat or cooking via fire- remove all fire from operation-outlaw lightning as it too starts fires, No coal generated electric companies or even electricity as often responsible for damaging fires. Floods happen so no more rain evaporate all water.. So you are welcome to your original contention enjoy...
yet C.strayed did not leave a trail of uncontrollable forest fires in her wake.
Again my term of rip it out burn it_ was a figure of speech related only to intimate personal relationship dynamics. I have never started a forest fire, or even a moderately out of control fire. been able to contain any kitchen fires doing no damage to appliances or home. occasionally i have scarred a potholder..I use care with flame...
 backcreek7
Joined: 12/2/2014
Msg: 268
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/5/2017 4:13:13 PM
" lets remove all discoveries "

can we add, cheese food ~ to the list ?

^^ kiss kiss ~ wink / hug ~ col
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 269
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/5/2017 7:54:15 PM
haha, heathcliff laugh yes definitely remove cheese food as it refuses natural bacteria or deterioration - what is it??? food?? i am not thinking so..lol
 hearton64
Joined: 6/9/2016
Msg: 270
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 3:39:12 AM

It depends on how long you got to know the person.
I've had some of the best relationships of my life in the same fashion.
But it also depends on what you are looking for. A wife? Nah.


Hiking way back to the original post.
I'm curious why first date sex makes
a woman non-wife/relationship material to a % of men?

Why have sex WITH them only to judge them negatively afterwards?
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 271
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 5:18:43 AM
There are some little boys with immature views, who must slut shame women. As for the rest, its not the first date sex that turns them off to the potential of a relationship, its something else in the personality. So, the relationship moves at the speed of light--instead of months, its over in weeks or days. its probably easier to say the guy's a jerk than admit he might have been turned off by a shallow attitude or a lack of intellectual curiousity or compassion or....
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 272
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Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 8:53:04 AM


Why have sex WITH them only to judge them negatively afterwards?



There are some little boys with immature views, who must slut shame women. As for the rest, its not the first date sex that turns them off to the potential of a relationship, its something else in the personality. So, the relationship moves at the speed of light--instead of months, its over in weeks or days. its probably easier to say the guy's a jerk than admit he might have been turned off by a shallow attitude or a lack of intellectual curiousity or compassion or....


To finish that statement for you,
“It’s probably easier to say the guy's a jerk than admit he might have been turned off by a shallow attitude or a lack of intellectual curiosity or compassion or just plain bad or boring sex.”

But once again, if the relationship is going to crash and burn, for any of the above reasons, isn't it better to find out sooner rather than later?

YMMV
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 273
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 11:32:12 AM
well- the quality of sex on first date- is not a trajectory of sexual satisfaction in any LTrelationship, intimacy guides and develops sexual satisfaction in a LTR . no first date sex contains, anything but, very shallow, surface- connections, that can possibly lead to successful long term connections.. if a relationship fails intimacy building for any reason whatsoever, it ends- 1date , 7000 dates , engagement, marriage etc--yes often it is nice to note and let go of misconstructions, prior to extending months, years or decades fighting the basic disjuncture- some disjuncture may for whatever reason build intimacy, however, can just as often degrade intimacy- each of us has to make our own decisions of approach- seems unfortunate that this question tends to again fall on women's sexual expression as the detriment to intimate relations, when the original question was just Sex on first date LTR? material?? so why are many of the answers correlated to women's success in LTR. and her ability to be sexually entertaining over the long haul? Many men have presented sexual skill and prowess "potential* sic" on first and last sexual encounter-yet when intimacy fails or betrayals degrade trust and intimacy- so does gratification"potential"! there is the door, don't let it hit ya in the ass on the way out. lol
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 274
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 2:05:58 PM
the quality of sex may get better between two people, assuming they are willing to listen to each other's complaints and requests and change their techniques...or the guy goes on ED meds if that's a problem. otherwise, a selfish wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am gent may always be a selfish lover. A slow hand lover may always be someone who doesn't do quickies...or do them well (if there is such a thing). The lady who posted here recently about wanting an aggressive man in bed, if he isn't aggressive the first time, will he change his nature? Some couples complain about sex becoming routine, suggesting the first few times was the best time.

Indeed, why is long haul potential based on how sexually entertaining she is? Does it suggest men date in order to get laid? Does it suggest men will put up with any behavior from a woman they share a life with, so long as they get good sex out of it? Does it suggest women will put up with any behavior, just to get a relationship out of it? Do men see the difference between a relationship with a woman and a friendship with a woman, to be about sex and what they'll put up with to get good sex versus just sex?
 Inicia
Joined: 4/12/2015
Msg: 275
Sleeping with someone on the first date...are they LTR material?
Posted: 9/6/2017 5:18:16 PM
many women enjoy sex- many men enjoy sex- period. a relationship with drama and baggage encourages sexual desire in neither partner. period. end of story. if Sex on first date causes judgemental attitude- takes two to tango! goose for gander-either or..
if your sex in a ltr is not getting better- you are not having a ltr. you are alone. i know i was alone w/SO for five years- he was happy as a clam- with everybody and i mean everyone wink wink. get the drift-and actually threatened to stay and did until i evicted him, two months after i evicted the female sex partner, he invited, into my home, without my permission- she too refused to leave when I politely asked her. yeah, our sex life was bad, and it had nothing to do with my sexual capabilities, desire or prowess or his or our sexual compatibility.. wow yeah change your technique from disgust to acceptance.i am just not jesus incarnate.a good role model but i failed the test of real love- "my love was fake and he the victim.. " his words not mine..
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