Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > The way women reject a dude online...      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 76
The way women reject a dude online...Page 4 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)


His words and attitudes have triggered traumatic memories in many of us women but I think because he is incredibly stupid etc. he is incapable of understanding how he's done that, it's done deliberately but with no idea of the impact it will have or how it was managed in the first place...


My main issue is the fact that after I spoke about violence and how it had impacted on my family, out came that quote that women love a bad boy.

My mum has a friend who was in an abusive relationship for a long time. She was a midwife, she was basically forced to give up work, she was cut off from all her friends, she had two kids to him, he has adult kids that she brought up who have been poisoned against her and his first wife

The final straw was when there was an incident where her son was pushed into a door and he refused to treat his son. She knew that she had to get out or he could end up hurt.

He went off sick to avoid paying maintenance, hes a GP, he has his own practice and also works as a locum, hes worth around a million quid. The last I heard she was getting 400 pounds a month for both kids.

He went to court to stop her getting what was due to her (she sold her flat and put the proceeds into buying the family home).

There was also an incident, a breach of the peace at her new home, she was told he would get off with it because of who he was, but he didnt. He has no interest in the kids but fought for custody of both of them. He doesnt see the older child, because he made it clear to the judge that he was absolutely terrified of his father. Hes got no interest in his daughter, he just went through the process of fighting for custody to cause his ex partner as much stress as possible. He was also cheating on my mums friend.

I am very aware that there are some horrible females on the planet, but please, when you come on here and you get the all women are terrible speech when you see what some women have gone though, dont ever tell me that women love a bad boy or kids need a bit of "roughen up"

Because you dont have a clue what you are talking about!
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 77
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 2:25:14 PM
Her story sounds very familiar, it seems that is how the story always go...and I do think men are absolutely just as equally capable of falling for a controlling partner and having their lives and soul destroyed too.

But we, the abused, always seem to be treated as if we are guilty...it must be because of how we carry ourselves: ashamed, our haunted eyes looking downward, a hunched countenance...we probably appear shifty, sly and people may wonder why we avoid them, can't look them in the eye.

My experience was with a male horror who declared his love for me within weeks...I felt guilty I didn't feel the same (thought I'd led him on) so I waited for the right opportunity to let him down gently...it didn't come, I couldn't escape and I blamed myself for the situation I found myself in, shouldn't have allowed it drag on, should have been stronger....I'd been manipulated by him...he was good at that.

Feet under the table, accepted by my family albeit grudgingly, introduced to my friends as the boyfriend, he set about undermining me to them all...apparently I was crazy, hardly made sense, was foolish, silly, also I made up stories about friends and family, I was unkind, a stupid b!tch.

My attitude was that it would take too much energy to defend myself, you're my family, you're my friend.... you know me better than this, if you fall for his bollix you never really knew me anyway so fvck you. As it happened people knew what was going on but felt they couldn't help unless I expressly asked for help and others couldn't bear to be around me now that he was a permanent fixture in my life...so friends fell away and family didn't really recognise me anymore...we became estranged, I felt isolated, all I had was him.

That's when he thought he could get me to do anything for him...first, he wanted half my wages....he said he was entitled to them as we were a couple....he didn't have a job and the dole wasn't keeping him in the manner he felt befitted him. All of my possessions became ours, he demanded I tell him everything I was thinking, he said that's what being a couple is all about...if I didn't tell him every single thought I had it meant I was lying by omission.

I swear to God it seemed like a lifetime before I was rid of him but not before we had two children together and when he started to be abusive to me via arguing and claims everybody hated me, that I was worthless and everybody pitied him having to put up with the b!tch I was...they were all on his side...he shouted at me as I was feeding my children, tiny frightened toddlers....he threw furniture all over, smashed the children's toys to bits...they witnessed it all.

I was lucky that he was actually a cowardly bully, whilst he happily made mine and my children's lives a misery believing there'd be no consequence....he was scared sh!tless when my brother was waiting for him the next time he called over....all my brother did was say "Fvck off, leave my sister alone!" and that was literally it...bit of an anti-climax...he ran like the clappers never to be seen again until a while later but that's a whole other story.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 78
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 2:29:42 PM
One of my ex bfs, who treated me very very badly, a lot of emotional abuse, his second wife has just left him. Thats divorce number two in ten years.

Men get treated horribly by some women, but I am sick of the shit all over the boards re how awful women are, there are horrible people of both genders and people really need to accept this.
 10ky
Joined: 11/15/2012
Msg: 79
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 2:40:48 PM
lol. Men are scared of her, men are scared of her son, men are scared of her brother and then they're just a family of defective autistic imbeciles. smh.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 80
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 2:59:12 PM
Whats funny about anything she posted above?

I know you don't like her and she doesn't like you, but what is amusing about a tale of someone and their kids being physically and emotionally abused.

I see nothing to LOL about
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 81
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:01:29 PM

lol. Men are scared of her, men are scared of her son, men are scared of her brother and then they're just a family of defective autistic imbeciles. smh.

Square...are you scared of me?

It's true certain people are scared of my son and yeah, it's mostly to do with the fact he's ultra-strong physically and 6'5" in height...but actually, he's scarier because of his cutting wit and immense intelligence...good luck to anybody who tries to take him down.

A cowardly bully was scared of my brother...I heard what my brother said and all he said was what I already told you, nothing more...I can't vouch for the look in his eye or stance as he said what he said but it had the desired effect regardless...

Odd response by slaphead to my post...very odd.


Well, Orange has reiterated often enough that feminism is about equality. I've said numerous times that patriarchy has done my sons no favours, they are also victims of an outdated way of being, I mean really, being a young male today is just as bad as being a woman in a few ways....obviously women are worse off, children moreso.

Women have been to the fore at exerting their rights recently...prior to female suffragettes, there were men fighting for their rights/Suffrage during the industrial revolution.

The sister I dislike immensely is probably just like your ex....married twice, each marriage lasted between a year to two years. I know what she is but how do you tell someone they're making a big mistake...I couldn't warn her fiancees, partly because I hoped it was real, that she was in love and wasn't using him. My ex's sister actually took me aside and begged me to run as far as I could from him...you're too nice for him, get away while you can....she was his twin! Unfortunately, she made me pity him even more.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 82
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:01:46 PM

I swear to God it seemed like a lifetime before I was rid of him but not before we had two children together and when he started to be abusive to me via arguing and claims everybody hated me, that I was worthless and everybody pitied him having to put up with the b!tch I was...they were all on his side...he shouted at me as I was feeding my children, tiny frightened toddlers....he threw furniture all over, smashed the children's toys to bits...they witnessed it all.


My uncle was the person who threw my stepdad out. Good on your brother.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 83
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:04:39 PM


The sister I dislike immensely is probably just like your ex....married twice, each marriage lasted between a year to two years.


First was two years, second was 5/6. I have friends in common with his second wife and what struck me from facebook pics was how happy she looked when they got married.

By the end she just looked miserable and unwell. Shes gone back to where shes from and taken the kids with her, before the justice for fathers group pipes up I am positive he'll still see them.

Leopards and spots and all of that.
 10ky
Joined: 11/15/2012
Msg: 84
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:11:25 PM
-paul
Don't believe a single word she says... it's all fantasy. Castles in the air. I doubt her children actually exist albeit I don't really know. Have you not noticed her paranoia and extreme mood swings? She's not all these and this has nothing to do with liking or not.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 85
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:23:00 PM


Well, Orange has reiterated often enough that feminism is about equality. I've said numerous times that patriarchy has done my sons no favours, they are also victims of an outdated way of being, I mean really, being a young male today is just as bad as being a woman in a few ways....obviously women are worse off, children moreso.


I think my brother is the person he is because he was brought up in a home full of females.
 10ky
Joined: 11/15/2012
Msg: 86
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:25:24 PM
^
how many females did your bro grow up with paulette? more than 5?

In order to maintain the highest quality forums you are restricted to having no more then 2 of the last 10 posts on a thread.
Since 2 of the last 10 posts are yours you can not post to this th
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 87
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:27:45 PM

-paul
Don't believe a single word she says... it's all fantasy. Castles in the air. I doubt her children actually exist albeit I don't really know. Have you not noticed her paranoia and extreme mood swings? She's not all these and this has nothing to do with liking or not.


Eh...myself and Pauline have been around each other online for many years, it's likely that I'm repeating much of what she knows of me already from way back.

Would you like to meet my adult children fvcker?

Just to prove their existence like...

The fact that I know your real identity and have said as much marks me out as being paranoid?
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 88
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 3:55:13 PM

^
how many females did your bro grow up with paulette? more than 5?

In order to maintain the highest quality forums you are restricted to having no more then 2 of the last 10 posts on a thread.
Since 2 of the last 10 posts are yours you can not post to this th


I was responding to a specific comment about patriarchy being negative for men and I agree it can be. Particularly when the father figure is toxic, hopefully thats enough to answer that question, think Ive spoken enough about my home situation for people to get that it wouldn't have been positive for him to grow up around the situation we were in previously.


Eh...myself and Pauline have been around each other online for many years, it's likely that I'm repeating much of what she knows of me already from way back.

Would you like to meet my adult children fvcker?

Just to prove their existence like...

The fact that I know your real identity and have said as much marks me out as being paranoid?


Its not easy talking about violence on places like this, but its harder to live it as you know.
 scareymush
Joined: 8/9/2011
Msg: 89
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/26/2017 4:43:00 PM
I know loads of men including my brothers who would never opt to be physically violent, rather they'd attempt to reason before throwing down the gauntlet and putting themselves forward for a beating.

My 6'5" son has been subjected to random physical assaults such as a glasgow kiss when waiting for the nightbus home....the perpetrator was a short@rse on a mission to impress his mates....my son found out who he was later and......I don't think it ended well for the oik who took my son by surprise.

Here's the thing, I know how to fight and I'd beat the crap out of anybody who dared attack me....honestly, I've had a great laugh enjoying my physical prowess in the face of being attacked by ridiculosly aggressive sorts...it's a mere matter of blocking their ability to strike you and when you're much taller and stronger it's a bit of a laugh and so easy.

Otherwise I'm non-violent
 imanorangetiger
Joined: 12/29/2011
Msg: 90
view profile
History
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 3:29:18 AM
I have no doubts about Pauline's and scarey's accounts, as I see regular similarities in my counselling room, as did my dad in his social work. People shouldn't have to endure those experiences. 10ky resorting to inappropriately LOLing about them and calling scarey a liar is sinking to a new low. What a wanker he is.
 10ky
Joined: 11/15/2012
Msg: 91
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 6:15:01 AM
-paul

Father figure being toxic, well, that's not patriarchy. That's just the influence of a bad dude frankly or at least so I think.

-all
You are all giving the impression that men are the abusers par excellence when in reality, women are almost as abusive as men apparently and can be even more abuse than men in matter of emotional abuse:

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence

Society overlooks the plight of men so women are able to conceal their abuse better. There's no scope for women (as a group) to play the victim any more. This is the inequality and injustice and oppression I have been talking about all along.

PS: Don't ask me how this thread ended up about abuse and misogyny but alas... so allah wannit I suppose. (shrugs)
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 92
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 6:41:18 AM
Are they? Two women die in Wales and England every week as the result of domestic violence from a current or former partner.

Out of around 100930 domestic abuse prosecutions in England and Wales in 2016, 92.1 per cent of defendants, that is people defending the charge were male and 7.9 per cent were female.

Where gender was recorded 83.3 per cent of victims were female and 16.7 per cent were male.

The stats really don't back up your theory about injustice and oppression of men. Most victims are female.

Violence is wrong full stop but don't suggest that there's as much violence towards men as there is to women. It's not the case.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 93
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 7:43:27 AM
Nearly 130 women were abused by men every day last year in Scotland, official figures have revealed.

The shocking statistic emerged in an annual Government report on the extent of domestic abuse.


There were 58,810 incidents recorded by police in the past year – up one per cent on 2015-16.

Women were the victim of a male abuser in 79 per cent of the cases where gender was recorded.

That suggests there were 46,460 female victims over the year, or 127 on average every day.

Justice Secretary Michael Matheson said the findings were “unacceptable”.

He said: “While figures have been relatively stable over the past five years, they remain evidence of unacceptable levels of domestic abuse in Scotland.

“We know these figures don’t paint the whole picture, as victims are often too afraid to report abuse. We also know domestic abuse disproportionately affects women.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 94
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 7:48:54 AM

You are all giving the impression that men are the abusers par excellence when in reality, women are almost as abusive as men apparently and can be even more abuse than men in matter of emotional abuse:


Show me the evidence as to where women are more emotionally abusive than men

https://www.theguardian.com/society/2010/sep/05/men-victims-domestic-violence


Society overlooks the plight of men so women are able to conceal their abuse better.


How does it? Women have been prosecuted for being violent towards men


There's no scope for women (as a group) to play the victim any more.


My mum wasn't playing the victim, neither were the women she worked with when she set up a womens aid in our home town (some of them are dead now).



This is the inequality and injustice and oppression I have been talking about all


What inequality and injustice and oppression exactly?
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 95
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 8:25:10 AM
"Violence against women continues to persist as one of the most heinous, systematic and prevalent human rights abuses in the world. It is a threat to all women, and an obstacle to all our efforts for development, peace, and gender equality in all societies." Ban Ki moon, United Nations Secretary General, 2007

Violence and the threat of violence affect women across the world, regardless of wealth, race, and culture. It inflicts devastating physical and psychological impacts on women and has wide-ranging costs for their families communities and societies. Violence against women includes rape and sexual violence, female genital mutilation, forced marriage, stalking, commercial sexual exploitation such as prostitution and pornography, crimes and murders committed in the name of ‘honour’, sexual harassment and domestic violence.
Historically, violence against women, particularly domestic violence, has been hidden, ignored and left off the human rights agenda. It is often seen as a 'private issue' or a women's issue' and not treated with the seriousness it deserves. We need to change this. Violence against women is never normal, legal or acceptable and should never be tolerated or justified. Everyone – individuals (both men and women), communities, governments, and international bodies - has a responsibility to put a stop to it and to redress the suffering it causes.
Some statistics
Scotland
A domestic violence incident is recorded every 10 minutes in Scotland with 53,681 incidents reported in 2008-9.1
In 2011-12 Crimes of rape increased by 13% to 1,2742
There were over 7000 reports of sexual offences in 2011 -123
26% of Scots surveyed in 2007 thought that a woman bore some responsibility for being raped if she wore revealing clothing4
The number of reported domestic violence incidents steadily increase each year.5
In 2011-12, 81% of recorded domestic abuse incidents were violence against a woman committed by a man.6
1 in 3 teenage girls in a relationship, suffer an unwanted sexual act7
At least 1 in 5 women in Scotland will experience domestic violence in their lifetime.8
In a 2005 study of young people’s attitudes, 1 in 5 young men believe that women often ’provoke violence'.9
UK
45% of women have experienced some form of domestic violence, sexual assault or stalking.10
21% of girls and 16% of boys experience some form of child sexual abuse11
At least 80,000 women suffer rape every year.12
In a survey for Amnesty International, over 1 in 4 respondents thought a women was partially or totally responsible for being raped if she was wearing sexy or revealing clothing, and more than 1 in 5 held the same view if a woman had had many sexual partners.13
On average, two women a week in England and Wales are killed by a violent partner or ex-partner. This constitutes nearly 40% of all female homicide victims.14
70% of incidents of domestic violence result in injury, (compared with 50% of incidents of acquaintance violence, 48% of stranger violence and 29% of mugging).15
Around 85% of forced marriage victims are women16
Domestic violence is estimated to cost victims, services and the state a total of around £23 billion a year.17

Globally
At least one in three women is beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused by an intimate partner in the course of her lifetime.
Women aged 15-44 are more at risk from rape and domestic violence than from cancer, motor accidents, war and malaria, according to World Bank data.19
Approximately 80,000 women suffer rape and attempted rape every year 20
More than 60 million women are "missing" from the world today as a result of sex-selective abortions and female infanticide (Amartya Sen, Nobel Laureate)
Several global surveys suggest that half of all women who die from homicide are killed by their current or former husbands or partners.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 96
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 8:33:56 AM
Women in Saudi Arabia have been granted the right to drive, overturning a cornerstone of Saudi conservatism that had been a cause célèbre for activists demanding reforms in the fundamentalist kingdom.


‘I felt like one of my father’s songbirds, let out of its cage’: driving as a woman in Saudi Arabia
Read more
King Salman ordered the reform in a royal decree delivered on Tuesday night, requesting that drivers’ licences be issued to women who wanted them.

Following the decree, women will no longer need permission from a legal guardian to get a licence and will not need a guardian in the car when they drive, said the new Saudi ambassador to Washington DC, Prince Khalid bin Salman bin Abdulaziz.

“I think our leadership understands our society is ready,” he told reporters.

Asked by reporters if Saudi Arabia planned to relax the guardianship laws, or take any other steps to expand women’s rights, Salman would not comment.

The US state department welcomed the move as “a great step in the right direction”.

The decision comes amid a broad reform program that last week led to women being allowed into a sports stadium for the first time.

It is the most significant change yet to a rigidly conservative social order in Saudi Arabia that has strictly demarcated gender roles, and severely limits the role of women in public life.

Earlier this month, a Saudi cleric was banned from preaching after saying that women should not be allowed to drive because their brains shrink to a quarter the size of a man’s when they go shopping.

Advertisement

The move had been widely anticipated amid a transformation of many aspects of Saudi society that has been branded by one senior minister as “cultural revolution disguised as economic reform”. Recent months have seen live concert performances in Riyadh – albeit to male-only audiences – while the powers of the once-omnipresent religious police have been curtailed.

Saudi Arabia had been the last country in the world in which women were banned from driving – a fact that was frequently used by critics as proof that female citizens of the kingdom were among the world’s most repressed.

The most recent campaign to allow female drivers started in Saudi Arabia about 10 years ago, and reached a peak in 2013, when several women who had sat behind the wheel on the country’s roads were briefly arrested by police.

In response to the announcement, Manal al-Sharif, who became the public face of the campaign, after she was imprisoned for driving, tweeted: “Today the last country on earth to allow women to drive … we did it.”
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 97
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 8:42:29 AM
Human rights groups and women’s activists in Saudi Arabia have called on the country’s government to scrap a controversial male guardianship law following the announcement that it would lift a ban on female drivers.

A royal decree lifting the kingdom’s ban on female drivers was announced on Tuesday evening. It is expected to come into force next June.

Saudi activists welcomed the move, which Amnesty international called the “a long overdue small step.”

Attention is now turning to the Kingdom’s controversial male guardianship law, which requires every woman to seek permission of a man for a range of things including applying for a passport, travelling abroad, or getting married.

Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman is believed to be behind the move
Saudi Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman is believed to be behind the move CREDIT: PRESIDENCY PRESS SERVICE
" We also need to see a whole range of discriminatory laws and practices swept away in Saudi Arabia including the guardianship system where every woman has a male guardian, be it their father, brother, husband or son, having authority to make decisions on her behalf," Amnesty International said in a statement on Wednesday.

Mariam al Otaibi, a 30 year old activist who spent 104 days in jail earlier this year after her father had her arrested on charges of "disobedience", told the Telegraph the move left her optimistic about a broader shift in official attitudes to women, including the case against her.

“I think we will witness many changes soon,” she said. "I always thought this was bound to happen but not before the end of 2018."

Saudi Arabia was the only country in the world to ban women from driving
Saudi Arabia was the only country in the world to ban women from driving CREDIT: FAISAL AL NASSER/REUTERS
“I feel optimistic, because to me this means that some change is taking place and that hopefully the court won’t find me guilty,” Ms al Otaibi

Tuesday’s surprise decree is credited to Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman, the 32 year old heir to the throne who now oversees almost every major policy area.

Prince Salman is widely expected to succeed to the throne on the death of his 82 year old father, King Salman, and the decision to lift the ban on female drivers will be seen as a litmus test of his ability to force through a raft of radical reforms.

There have already been signs that law may be weakened.

Saudi women finally given right to drive Saudi women finally given right to drive
01:14
A royal decree issued in April ordered government agencies to grant women access to services without a guardian’s approval unless required by existing regulations.

It is unclear whether women will require a male guardian’s approval to apply for a driving license.

Tuesday’s move also has profound economic implications.

About 10 million women over the age of 20, including foreigners, live in Saudi Arabia - forming a significant untapped market for the car sales and insurance industries.

The move will be blow to the army of chauffeurs, most of them immigrants, who currently earn a living as drivers to women banned from getting behind the wheel.

There are nearly 1.4 million foreigners working as household drivers in Saudi Arabia, Reuters reported on Wednesday.

On wages of around $500 a month plus board and accommodation, they collectively take home around $8.8 billion annually.

“The removal of the need for a family driver – even when women don’t work – will help boost real income for mid- and lower-income families,” said Monica Malik, chief economist at Abu Dhabi Commercial Bank, told Reuters.
 10ky
Joined: 11/15/2012
Msg: 98
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 8:51:37 AM
It would be interesting to statistically analyse traffic accident rates in Saudi A. now...

... we might dispel a myth after all.

I know what official stats say about domestic violence but they do not reflect the reality of the situation. Men tend not to report abuse but tough it out. When they do, they're not taken seriously by the authorities, UNLIKE WOMEN! Please do not deny that unless you've got something in hand.

Indeed, there are battered women out there and that is absolutely unacceptable but likewise, there is an (almost) equal number of battered (emotionally, physically or otherwise) men out there and that is equally unacceptable! Depicting men as the abusers is misandry!
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 99
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 9:30:58 AM

I know what official stats say about domestic violence but they do not reflect the reality of the situation. Men tend not to report abuse but tough it out. When they do, they're not taken seriously by the authorities, UNLIKE WOMEN! Please do not deny that unless you've got something in hand.


My mum got no protection from the authorities when she was being abused, it was considered as a domestic. My mum worked with women who are now dead, thanks to the violence they endured. Is that enough in hand for you? One womans address was given out by the police and he went round and killed her. Is that quite enough in hand for you.

Or shall I say again that my mums friend was emotionally abused and controlled by her ex partner, who was arrested for a breach of the peace after she had moved out. That he shoved his 10 year old son against a door, striking his head, refused to treat him (he was a GP), that he went to court to deny her a share of anything financial she had put into the relationship and also went off sick to avoid paying maintenance for his kids? Paying 400 pounds a month when your income is a million pounds? That enough of in hand for you?

I was out on Christmas Eve with a group of friends, we were in someone's house and having a drink and my friend cracked a joke about fancying someone who was on the TV programme that we were watching. Her fiancee grabbed her, pulled her off the couch and flung her about the room until his friends intervened and got him out of the house we were in.
I had to deal with the aftermath of two rapes when I was working with young people. Would you like me to go on?


Indeed, there are battered women out there and that is absolutely unacceptable but likewise, there is an (almost) equal number of battered (emotionally, physically or otherwise) men out there and that is equally unacceptable! Depicting men as the abusers is misandry!


No there is not an almost equal number of men being abused, the stats are around 80/20 in favour of women being the ones being abused. There will be women who don't report abuse as well. Dont kid yourself on that every single woman who is beaten by her partner reports it to the police.


Depicting men as the abusers is misandry!


It takes a special kind of someone to accuse someone like me after the experiences Ive had of being a misandrist.

person who dislikes, despises, or is strongly prejudiced against men.
"the counterpart to a misogynist is a misandrist"

The last person to do so on these boards was man of substance, I'll just leave that there



When they do, they're not taken seriously by the authorities, UNLIKE WOMEN!


Tosh. If you had read anything I posted earlier you'll see that I posted links to the number of convictions where men have been abused and reported it in England and Wales.


Out of around 100930 domestic abuse prosecutions in England and Wales in 2016, 92.1 per cent of defendants, that is people defending the charge were male and 7.9 per cent were female.
 Paulinenbeans
Joined: 9/17/2017
Msg: 100
The way women reject a dude online...
Posted: 10/27/2017 9:33:02 AM
Rape cases have long attracted controversy for their persistently low conviction rates and the associated questions of how the police and prosecutors treat victims of rape and bring cases through the courts.

The government estimates that as many as 95% of rapes are never reported to the police at all.

Of the rapes that were reported from 2007 to 2008, only 6.5% resulted in a conviction on the charge of rape. The majority of convictions for rape resulted from an admission of guilt by the defendant, whereas less than one quarter of all those charged with rape were convicted following a successful trial.

Prosecutors have accepted a number of failures in dealing with rape, particularly since the publication in 2007 of the Without Consent report, which was highly critical of some aspects of the way the police and prosecuting authorities deal with rape cases.


Guardian Today: the headlines, the analysis, the debate - sent direct to you
Read more
One of the most serious problems has been the initial handling of rape complaints by the police.

The 2007 report by Her Majesty's Chief Inspectorate and Her Majesty's Crown Prosecution Service Inspectorate, the independent inspectorates for the police and CPS, found that many officers dealing with rape victims had "very little training in responding to rape cases" and a "lack of awareness" of the need to follow the relevant guidance.

Victims were found to experience delays, "unpleasant environments", inappropriate behaviour by professionals, insensitive questioning during interviews and "judgmental or disbelieving attitudes" when coming forward with complaints of rape.

As a result, between half and two-thirds of rape cases did not proceed beyond the investigation stage. The majority of victims decide to withdraw their complaints, while high levels of rape complaints are essentially ignored, with reports pointing to scepticism on the part of the police and "the view that the victim lacks credibility".

Advertisement

"Rape cases raise very difficult and sensitive issues, which need to be addressed with more vigour by the police and the CPS," said lawyer Saimo Chahal, who has brought legal challenges against the CPS for its treatment of rape cases.

A number of steps have been taken to try to improve conviction levels, including new policy guidelines and specially trained police officers and prosecutors.

There has also been an increase in sexual assault referral centres, although critics say access to these varies hugely across different regions in England and Wales.

The government has acknowledged this "postcode disparity" and pledged to address it.

Vera Baird, the solicitor general, said: "I have personally liaised with less well-performing areas and a range of national and local action is now in place to try and bring up the performance of all areas."

A spokesman for the CPS said: "The CPS recognises that the conviction rate for rape is low."

• This article was amended on 19 August 2011. The original did not make clear that the reference to 6.5% was for reported rapes that resulted in a conviction on the charge of rape. This has been corrected. In the same sentence the figure of 6.5% was wrongly compared with "34% of criminal cases generally". In fact the figure 34% was a misread reference in a press release by the solicitor general in 2008 that stated "34% of all [rape] cases prosecuted result in a conviction". The incorrect reference to "34% of criminal cases generally" has been deleted.
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > The way women reject a dude online...