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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger t      Home login  
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 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 26
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

How would you know someone is lying-by 10 years-about their age, until you meet them, get to know the person, and find out the person's birthday? Some people may look 10 years older or younger than their actual age (and depending on what age range being discussed), so appearance alone won't necessarily tell you they are lying.

It's Not about appearance, that's the point.

That's why I'd rather have the gal look like her pictures (cute) than look 10 years older than them (huh?)...

... rather than, as an example in this thread, a gal writes me and her profile says she's 36... she's cute but looks a little older... but right after the hellos and starting chit-chat, she tells me she's actually older and is 46... AND she does in fact look like her pics (say she shows me her FB page) -- I won't rule her out. Especially if she said she was 39 but was really, say, 42. OK. They're not lying To Me, they're pointing out the # inaccuracy in the profile. Granted 10 is a lot -- pretty bold. But the stereotype is that gals fib about their age IRL a decent amount... and at the end of the day, what's important is you Look like your pics + you do end up giving me a heads up on it.

Would I be p!ssed if a gal had to come forward after talking to tell me she's not 45, but instead 39? Or that she left her pics of herself several sizes bigger than she is now on her profile and she's really more slender (in a good way)? No.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 27
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 8:02:30 AM
I'm reminded of a T-shirt that proclaimed,

The 1o best years of a woman's life are between 39 annnnnnnd 40.

My old female boss, on her birthday cake, would have "39 again" in place of an age listed.

Some ladies lie about their age b/c they don't want to be pushed aside and treated the way we treat, y'know, old broads :) Maybe the golden rule is, assume everyone you've just met is "putting their best foot forward" and don't put all your eggs into their basket until you're sure its not a basket woven from little white lies.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 28
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 10:58:15 AM
It would be a deal breaker for me.

I don't really get the point, either. So, he put 51 in his profile, and then before you could meet, he said he was really 61? What????

What did you end up doing, OP?
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 29
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 11:31:05 AM

A better question is if he represented an age of 57 and then confessed to being 67, would you have any doubt? Polling others will not resolve this for you ... that will be internal as you negotiate the value of his potential youth and energy with his violation of your extensive list of rigid guidelines which already prohibit contact from those whose age is incorrect.


9Pluto - That would bother me just as much. It’s not about what age he really is but that he’s misrepresenting himself. I dated a guy a few years ago who turned out to be lying about his age and, in the end, I found out most of what he said about himself was inaccurate. I still don’t know how old he is and we were dating for a year. His profile says he’s the same age he said he was three years ago. I guess time runs differently in his world.

As for the dates on the photos, I have hardly any photos of myself. I assure you none are photo shopped.

6jellybeans:

“If I am interested the age is not going to put me off but the lie will. It is that simple.”


My feelings exactly.



"Will every question you pose have two answers?”


Aintnodeal: I have no idea. Probably not. You can go back and look at questions I've posted in the past and see if that was the case.

Iredurbio2:

"Ageism is the new frontier. Old people that don't like old people are just the kind of people I want to no!”


Exactly!

Gtomustang:

"maybe he's real interesting b/c he lies about everything else.”


Don’t think I haven’t considered that possibility! I went through that once before only in that case I didn’t know he was lying about his age until a few years after we quit seeing each other. I ran across his profile and he was still the same age he was when I was dating him three years earlier!



Butheremalls: “I think the answer would be pretty simple, unless I had built my profile around a bunch of lies in an attempt to attract someone not smart enough to see them and if that is the case sounds like you two are a match.”


I’m not getting your point. He’s not on POF and I don’t have that specific warning in my profile on another site.



Norwegianguy456: “Yeah, but they're not lying right to you -- they're fibbing in their profile.”


True, but the reason they are fibbing on their profile is to get attention through deceptive means.



From site to sight: "How would you know someone is lying-by 10 years-about their age,”


Because he said he misrepresented his age in his first email to me.



Hikernbiker74: "Makes you wonder what else they're lying about or will lie about in the future.”


Yep.



Lilimarleen: "What did you end up doing, OP?”


I actually haven’t done anything yet. I’ve been stalling responding.

After thinking about it and reading these comments, I’ve come to the conclusion that even if I agreed to meet him, this would be on my mind too much to pay attention to him. It just doesn’t sit well with me.

I do have a more recent photo I can put up, will attend to that in the next couple of days.


Thanks for all the input.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 30
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 12:17:56 PM

True, but the reason they are fibbing on their profile is to get attention through deceptive means.

Add in any extra striking adjectives, but fibbing on one's profile to get attention, yes -- that's all it was. As in his 1st communication with you he let you know. So my point is that it's conceptually Different than:

I dated a guy a few years ago who turned out to be lying about his age

... as this is Clearly NOT what he did. Big Difference. The problem with that guy is (online or not), he didn't tell you right off the bat what his accurate age was when you were in introductory bantering. Additionally, this guy online you're referring to -- He Never Lied To You About His Age. I repeat: He Never Lied To YOU About His Age. :)

Since it's 10 years and not 3-4 years to "stay in a decade" (29/39/49/59) -- I would be more concerned about his Pics being current. That'd be my focal point for validation. But even @61, he's still younger than you. And if he WAS 51 and you 64, do you Really expect you two riding off in the sunset together-forever? Fat chance. Now it doesn't rule it out. Hmmm. I would have made clear after the bantering kicked off -- would be to say that he has no more room for even Classic "profile advertising exaggerations", so to speak, and to lay out the cards and show me how you are moreso than the average person.

Again: He never lied to You about his age. :) One can't have any Sympathy for him if a gal, in reply to his 1st email says thanks but no thanks, but it's not a "RUN! GO!!" situation. :) Besides, if he WAS 51 and not 61 -- would you two be running off in the LTR sunset? Fat chance. Actually a real chance that he let you know about now, him being close to your age (and still younger).
 butheremails
Joined: 11/1/2017
Msg: 31
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 1:11:47 PM

I’m not getting your point. He’s not on POF and I don’t have that specific warning in my profile on another site.


So what you claim about your character only applies to the site that you posted it on?

That is like putting a jesus fish on your car and telling people that you are only catholic when you drive.

Seriously, if you feel the need to make excuses for your hypocrisy so go be a hypocrite.
 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 32
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 1:19:31 PM
I wouldn't meet someone whose profile said something like this :

" please, please, please refrain from using "LOL"! It is a *huge* turn-off. And you making a big deal out of that just makes it look like you don't have anything better to say and is an even bigger turn off. "



I'm not a fan of the whole " lol " thing either but I wouldn't mention it in my profile as if little things like that are so important that I would deem it necessary to do so . I mean , I wouldn't want someone to think I was that tightly wound.


I highly recommend you delete that .
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 33
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 6:01:03 PM
^^^ Spot on!

Where have you been Chuck? You and your wit been missed.
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 34
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 Butterchickenchuck
Joined: 9/18/2015
Msg: 35
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 6:10:12 PM
Cool and Sun, thanks I appreciate that, a refreshing change from the usual crickets and tumbleweeds !
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 36
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/8/2017 6:15:55 PM
YW, BCC. The forums are missing something when you're not here.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 37
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/10/2017 5:56:20 PM
If a woman told me her real age prior to a date / meeting, it wouldn't bother me that much. I understand people lie about age to get around the POF age filters. I would be more disappointed if a person was dishonest about their appearance and was much older / heavier than they were in their pictures.
 flyover_boy
Joined: 12/28/2016
Msg: 38
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/10/2017 7:20:31 PM

I wouldn't meet someone whose profile said something like this :

" please, please, please refrain from using "LOL"! It is a *huge* turn-off. And you making a big deal out of that just makes it look like you don't have anything better to say and is an even bigger turn off. "



I'm not a fan of the whole " lol " thing either but I wouldn't mention it in my profile as if little things like that are so important that I would deem it necessary to do so . I mean , I wouldn't want someone to think I was that tightly wound.


I highly recommend you delete that .


That and the body of the profile text doesn't fit entirely on my screen. Too much...and TOO much ! Next !
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 6/16/2017
Msg: 39
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 2:56:37 AM

(arwen52) His profile says he's 51 but he said he's actually 61, that when he first went online and had his real age, he didn't get any hits, so he changed his age. He otherwise sounds very interesting but I'm really put off by this. What do others think? I've found that lying about one's age is, unfortunately, very common on dating sites. I wish I'd had the presence of mind to say oh, I understand, I lied about my age, too! I'm actually 74, not 64! But I didn't, I blew it, I said I found that a real turn-off.

What would you do? Would that be a deal-breaker or would you meet them anyway?


Had a situation similar to that here, years ago: met a woman who advertised her age as 50, when she was 57. Didn't last, but not directly because of that.

YMMV, OP. It obviously bothers you enough that you're asking, so probably it is, or will be soon, an issue for you.


(arwen52) . I wish I'd had the presence of mind to say oh, I understand, I lied about my age, too! I'm actually 74, not 64! But I didn't, I blew it, I said I found that a real turn-off.


You didn't "blow it" -- you were blindsided. You blurted out your honest feelings when surprised, which let him know where your line is.

Whatcha doin', hittin' on guys 13 years your junior, anyway? You some kinda MILF?
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 40
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 4:27:14 AM
Liars lie. It is the one thing they truly excel at. I wouldn't be interested in dating someone who I knew from the get go was lying.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 41
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 8:44:18 AM
I would go ahead and meet them, then when we're making out, I would say "oh, by the way, I was born female, but I'm getting my schlong next month. Is that a problem?"

Oh, and somewhat related - I honestly hope there's no one still on Earth who believes in the horseshit of "it's not polite to ask a woman her age". I sure as hell don't, and if a woman thinks I'm rude for asking, well....that's tough shit.
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 42
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 11:24:02 AM

I'm getting my schlong next month

I would enthusiastically say "So am I!".
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 43
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 1:58:45 PM

If a woman told me her real age prior to a date / meeting, it wouldn't bother me that much. I understand people lie about age to get around the POF age filters. I would be more disappointed if a person was dishonest about their appearance and was much older / heavier than they were in their pictures.

I wholeheartedly agree. 10 years in the OP's situation is a stretch, although if they do look closer to 51 instead of 61, and they tell you right off the bat -- I don't see that as some big problem, as they're telling You what's up (as the profile itself isn't any personal communication).

Liars lie. It is the one thing they truly excel at. I wouldn't be interested in dating someone who I knew from the get go was lying.

Yeah, but they're not lying to You or leading you on in any way, in this case. Someone lying about their age in their profile that still fits their life & looks (and not following-thru in 1-on-1 communication) -- would hardly place them in any "Liar" category. I can see someone being turned off about one purposely putting something in their profile that they're not really into as claimed, age a bit off, etc even though they're told outright off the bat... but I can also see why someone isn't when given a heads up about it, while said person is an open book about everything about themselves moreso compared to the average person online.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 6/16/2017
Msg: 44
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 2:44:46 PM

(spot4username) Liars lie. It is the one thing they truly excel at. I wouldn't be interested in dating someone who I knew from the get go was lying.


It always amuses me when people say stuff like this; almost always, without fail, the self-righteous types who impose such black-and-white interpretations on life, are great practitioners of Passive-Aggressive crap, and love nothing so much as Gaslighting others. There's wrong, and then there's really wrong. Some of the most interesting people are those who are willing to colour outside the lines.

Then again, it's a win-win when such a prude outs him/herself: saves others time.

If you don't like dating liars, and someone misrepresenting his/her age meets your criterion of "liar", then don't date him/her. Easy-peesy-lemon-squeezy.
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 45
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 2:46:23 PM
^^^
That is how you feel. It doesn't effect how I feel in the least. I answered the question from my perspective. You answered from your perspective.


In order to maintain the highest quality bollocks you are restricted to having no more then 2 of the last 10 posts on a thread.
Since 2 of the last 10 posts are yours you can not post to this thread.
 Arlo_Troutman
Joined: 6/16/2017
Msg: 46
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 3:04:10 PM

(spot4username) That is how you feel. It doesn't effect how I feel in the least.


I'm glad that it doesn't "effect" you. I'd feel horribly guilty if my answer had an "affect" on you...

(it's like shooting (Plenty of) Fish in a barrel, sometimes...)
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 47
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 3:13:11 PM
^^^^^
I was actually responding to Nor. Your comment was posted while I was typing.
We were ships that passed in the night.

In order to maintain the highest quality forums you are restricted to having no more then 2 of the last 10 posts on a thread.
Since 2 of the last 10 posts are yours you can not post to this thread.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 48
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 3:23:05 PM

It always amuses me when people say stuff like this; almost always, without fail, the self-righteous types who impose such black-and-white interpretations on life

I agree it's having too much of a trigger-finger to "pshaw" and isn't accurate. I don't agree that said folk are So often going to be the way you describe -- but yeah, you'll definitely find those types within those who have a trigger-finger like that.

I don't mind it when they are but also recognize that said person may not be some liar or anything, but they're being admittedly a little over-cautious when it comes to people they don't know is all. What gets me is when someone thinks they pretty are truly a liar and/or go off on the smallest little thing on a profile, with their frame of mind just looking for issues like making out real life structures from the shapes of clouds when staring at the sky.

That's why I always say IRL it's easier for a guy to meet a gal when he's got something "on paper" that has some turn-off potential. Like being on the shorter side, being on the older side, etc.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 49
Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 7:18:41 PM
If you rely on a liar for something in life you don't provide yourself...you learn to hate liars. If you're just chewin' the fat with a good ol'boy, then sometimes its fun to listen and realize your life is better than their lies. Its just passing time on a slow afternoon. And of course, it is fun to meet people who hate liars, and then you point out the times they've committed a lie of omission...and they try to explain that only lies of commission exist :)

When taking care of my elderly parents, I wish I had a dollar for every older professional who told me "don't worry son, we'll take care of it" and then 48 hours later call to say something they didn't expect had come up. was it a lie, or a bad prediction? Its still annoying, regardless. Schtick happens. The less you can gamble on other humans an amount of investment you can't afford, the better life is.

In matters of physical appearance, is there a lot of difference between a 20 yr old and a 30 yr old? How about a 40 yr old and a 50 yr old? How about maturity levels? It may depend upon the person. How about conversation topics or viewpoints on what is important in life? So maybe the issue returns to, is the person a liar or a fibber or an exaggerator? And how much of that will we overlook to get a hot body into bed? :) lol
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 50
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Would you meet someone whose profile says they are 10 years younger than they actually are?
Posted: 11/12/2017 11:22:25 PM
I know people in their 50's that put their age in their 30's to message younger people. Men and women both do this. Lately all I've run into is time wasters, and people taking vows of chastity for Jesus. It still doesn't top the date I had where the first thing the lady told me was that she goes to church to steal cases of pop.
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