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 bizzmanmatt
Joined: 11/25/2017
Msg: 51
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Match.com: All about the money(?)Page 3 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
What is OLD and IRL?

I remember meeting a girl a several years ago that was about 5'0. I don't remember if friends had us meet or we met through what was then Yahoo chat or personals. She was real sweet but scared to hug me before we went separate ways. She said I was too big. I think I talked her in to doing it but she was scared and shaky.

O.P. you are over thinking all this . I assume you're not very tall. If all you're going to do is online you're going to have to open up your search criteria and take a couple steps down the ladder in the physical appearance to find the women who'll stick if you want a lay or relationship.
 HanoverFella
Joined: 1/16/2018
Msg: 52
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 7:38:35 AM
OLD-online dating
IRL-in real life

Danimal just out of curiosity how tall are you actually? I noticed on your profile you’re listed as 5-8, which I don’t think is overly short, or is it embellished and you’re actually much shorter than that?? If so, there’s your reason for the who farted face at first meets. Although I understand your frustration
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 53
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 8:29:08 AM
My last physical exam the nurse put me at 5' 7-3/4", so I have been ABOUT 5' 8" since 10th grade - no heels or lifts involved

I believe the demographics in my area include far too many people fighting to keep their status quo and positions within the community. They are terrified of 'bad' urban elements moving out of the inner city, and it seems like the only new housing developments built in the area are either retirement communities, or four-and five-story palaces on golf courses. There are about eight oil-change places, six or seven furniture stores, a dozen or more coffee shops in a 6 square mile area - but not ONE auto parts store, or lawn mower rental shop, or a car junkyard. That has been by design since the 1970s.

We have nearby communities loaded with old money republican types, and seems like most everyone around here wants a taste of that 'good' life. My guess is that many have huge amounts of debt through credit cards or kids or mortgages trying to live up to that expectation.

We have waterways and lakes nearby, so boats and motorcycles and other such summer-related toys are indeed held in high esteem by many. I don't really know if that is anything unique compared to other parts of the world, but it's my reasoning why middle-aged ladies around here are turning their noses up in record numbers.
 HanoverFella
Joined: 1/16/2018
Msg: 54
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 9:32:50 AM
You’re probably correct on that Danimal, seems to be the norm now, people still thinking credit lines and credit cards are free money at their disposal.
I am probably actually around 5-81/2, but with any footwear, you gain at least a half inch, so I go with 5-9, haven’t had anyone upset yet
I can’t imagine meeting anyone barefoot..outside of Alabama :D
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 55
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 1:50:02 PM
Biz, I have seen men write in their profile what their height is when they're exceptionally tall, like a warning, in case it wasn't noticed in the stats. One guy was 6'-8"! I live in WA state where there are a lot of tall men. Being scared of a tall or tall and big man seems ridiculous, but some women are timid.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 56
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 2:14:16 PM

Sweet_Danimal
I believe the demographics in my area include far too many people fighting to keep their status quo and positions within the community. They are terrified of 'bad' urban elements moving out of the inner city,

LOL. I am living right square in the middle of the “bad urban elements” these days. I have been working in downtown Houston for the last 7+ years, and I hate a long commute. So 6 years ago I bought a HUD foreclosure in a bad part of town close to downtown (5.3 miles to my office). I was a little unsure about this when I first moved here, but it has worked out fine. The area is starting (slowly) to be gentrified, and the property values are going up quickly. Thankfully my property taxes are now fixed (I’m over 65).

Most of the “interesting” things in Houston happen close to downtown (arts, theatre, museums, live music venues), so I really enjoy being close in. I have had a few girl friends who didn’t like coming to my house due to the neighborhood, but most were all right with it.


There are about eight oil-change places, six or seven furniture stores, a dozen or more coffee shops in a 6 square mile area - but not ONE auto parts store, or lawn mower rental shop, or a car junkyard. That has been by design since the 1970s.

I have multitudes of auto parts stores, dozens of fast food places, zero coffee shops, and zero good eating places. Luckily about 2 or 3 miles over is a rather high end neighborhood with many many good eating places, coffee shops, wine bars, etc, etc.


HanoverFella
I can’t imagine meeting anyone barefoot..outside of Alabama :D

I have had women show up for an initial meeting barefoot. Not the norm, but it has happened. Empire Café for a casual brunch, outdoor seating, many people bring their dogs, not unusual to see people barefoot. Not me, thank you.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 57
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 2:46:29 PM

Biz, I have seen men write in their profile what their height is when they're exceptionally tall, like a warning, in case it wasn't noticed in the stats. One guy was 6'-8"!


I've only had one woman in my entire life who was actually afraid of my size. She told me she found everything appealing about me, but needed me to be about 4 inches shorter. She never explained why, and I never asked. Weeks later, her sister told me she was almost kidnapped by a guy approximately my size in a parking garage when she was in her teens and had feared taller men since then.


not unusual to see people barefoot.


Showing up somewhere without shoes (depending on where) is a bit weird, but if I'm out at a bar or club and end up meeting a woman, then dancing with her, it's not unusual for them to take their heels off after the last song. If I see they have nice feet, I'm one happy pig.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 58
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 4:47:02 PM
Holy Fvck, kidnapped! That must have been horrifying. It's a surprise she isn't scared of men in general and only about tall men.

Dan, girls just want to have fun☺ I don't know why you would assume people having fun are banging out their credit cards. I live around a lot of water and they are not only people with money that have water crafts. I know a guy out here with a sailboat that invites women in multiples on it all of the time. It's not an expensive boat. If that scenario doesn't sound appealing to you...... You sound like a guy that's tight with money. Life is passing you by. You're watching other people have fun and being resentful for no reason other than you don't want to do anything yourself. That's a choice you know. What do you do for fun? No woman wants to sign up to sit on your couch.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 59
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 7:05:37 PM

I have had women show up for an initial meeting barefoot.


I had one who had forgotten a few of her teeth. I'm too old for this anymore.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 60
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 1/31/2018 11:43:26 PM

Dan, girls just want to have fun☺

Do me a favor and write down in your reply what you think is the average annual income is for your community off the top of your head. Then Google the census data. Make sure you realize the difference between "Household" income, which is generally two people, and the Per Capita income, which is the general average of a single person.

How far off was your guess?

I checked it - and I'd have to say that anyone making the census average income would have a damn hard time making payments on both a house and a boat, and maybe a car and credit cards as well - assuming the standard of living in that area isn't extremely cheap.

People think who they live around, the life they are exposed to, and even sometimes the life they want - is 'Average'. It's always THEIR perspective that's 'average'. Why is that? Because it takes an open mind to realize just how simple that view really is in terms of the rest of the world. I pose that same question in discussion with friends, on dates, at church, whatever - I'm amazed how many skew their averages to higher than 150% or more.

My income is slightly above the Per Capita average for my town, which has one of the higher income averages in the state. But it is a SINGLE income - no alimony or child support or tax breaks or a big inheritance to bank on. People kind of forget the advantages they have sometimes... having kids may be ridiculously expensive, but having a house that's paid for practically doubles your spending power.

Have you ever seen that video of the school teacher who lines up the kids to foot race for $100, and then gives every kid who has had something advantageous in their lives a few extra steps head start? That needs to sink into people's minds.

I have friends with big houses and swimming pools and yachts and other such toys that invite me over all the time - so I don't need to spend money on that kind of stuff. But when people are online, checking off their precious dating shopping lists - ownership is 9/10 of the law. It doesn't matter that I know how to do take care of children - and have nine nieces and nephews - so long as I didn't have offspring of my own (my Ex had health issues) - I can't find any acceptance of that skill short of lying about it. This isn't about me refusing to have 'fun' - it's about the sh1tty perception people create from the superficial - and refuse to see it any other way. Spending a lot of money doesn't change that - it's just makes ME the fake I don't really want to be.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 61
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 10:41:10 AM

Sweet_Danimal
Do me a favor and write down in your reply what you think is the average annual income is for your community off the top of your head. Then Google the census data. Make sure you realize the difference between "Household" income, which is generally two people, and the Per Capita income, which is the general average of a single person.

How far off was your guess?

I checked it - and I'd have to say that anyone making the census average income would have a damn hard time making payments on both a house and a boat, and maybe a car and credit cards as well - assuming the standard of living in that area isn't extremely cheap.

Interesting experiment.

I guessed $40k for Houston, and $30k for my zip code.

Correct numbers? $29k for Houston, and $20k for my zip code. Interesting. How in hell do you pay rent and eat on an income of $29k?

NewYorker58
Dan, girls just want to have fun☺

I wish that were true!!!

Well, on second thought, maybe it is true of “girls”, but I don’t know too many girls.
 blackbeauty744
Joined: 12/1/2015
Msg: 62
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 11:46:13 AM
Is the cost of living in Houston low Henry?
 bizzmanmatt
Joined: 11/25/2017
Msg: 63
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 1:24:52 PM
Danimal, your postings are very very difficult to follow. I really don't know if I have an idea of what you're trying to say. That may be a little bit of the issue.

The majority of women I've known like to be active and have fun. Sometimes that does involve spending money. Some women are couch potatoes that don't care about doing anything. If you don't want to spend money find one that just wants to do free things. IF you don't want to do those free things, just get a couch potato gal that just wants to do what you want to do no matter what even if that's sit at home and save money.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 64
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 2:44:20 PM
Dan, what water do you have near you where they're boating, lake, river? I'm not saying you have to buy a boat, you have a short boating season, but boats are doable depending. A person doesn't have to buy a new or large boat. A person can dry dock it on their property or the boatyard to not pay slip fees. A boat with an outboard motor, like a Boston Whaler, can be bought for under $30,000. That would be the inexpensive way to go. For myself, I got on the water for $1,000 with having a kayak.

If you met someone, what would you do on dates? Where do you go to meet women?
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 65
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 3:13:59 PM

Danimal, your postings are very very difficult to follow. I really don't know if I have an idea of what you're trying to say. That may be a little bit of the issue.


My point is about perceptions. People believing certain things to be just 'So' without giving them careful consideration or doing homework.

People want a mate who's attractive, intelligent, wealthy, and aligns with their beliefs or habits in some way or another. Water is wet - we get it. What isn't talked about (or realized) is how far people skew their own little worlds' perception to fit their fantasy, instead of realizing life has it's own way of doing things.

Life isn't made up of ONLY tri-athletes and couch potatoes. We aren't just trailer trash or C.E.O.'s. People are not 'for' you or 'against' you. It isn't one extreme or another - yet people LOVE to stick others in those categories. Why? Because it's EASY. If people stretched their minds and perceptions even half as much as they do their bodies in yoga class - people wouldn't be fussing so much about finding partners that 'match'.

Spending money isn't the problem. Having fun isn't the problem. We know a bazillion ways to entertain and find direction in our lives that don't need a cent, and several that require a ticket to be purchased. What I'm saying - is that in here, looking for a mate - we want that ticket already purchased, punched, and guaranteed before we even say, "Hi!" because we are chicken to lose even a minute of precious time on any kind of trial or experiment. People claim all the time that they are 'open' to possibilities - but it's bullsh*t. We hedge our bets so high that it's no wonder we can't find ANYone to feel special about.

It's 5 pm in the evening here, and the outside temp is +5 degrees Fahrenheit. Guess what? Water isn't wet. It's cold and hard and immovable and hard to walk over. Guess that perception isn't exactly perfect, huh?
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 66
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 8:05:21 PM

I've only had one woman in my entire life who was actually afraid of my size. She told me she found everything appealing about me, but needed me to be about 4 inches shorter.


I've heard this from women plenty of times...

Actually, they probably want me to have 4 extra inches...
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 67
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/1/2018 11:17:33 PM
Dan, if men are waiting for guarantees, they'll be waiting a long time. Sounds like time to put on those ice skates!

CoolD, if that's the case, maybe girls used to super-sized schlong aren't optimum to go after
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 68
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Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/3/2018 3:03:26 PM

I've only had one woman in my entire life who was actually afraid of my size.

At 6-foot, it's only 1.5" taller than the average while male... although in big cities, it's a little more. Your height is a little short to be a point guard in D1 college basketball.

She told me she found everything appealing about me, but needed me to be about 4 inches shorter.

4"?! Like 5'8" MAX? LOL. How short was she -- like 4'11"? :)

She never explained why, and I never asked.

Then I guess she wasn't crazy-short. I would have asked though, with a chuckle.

Weeks later, her sister told me she was almost kidnapped by a guy approximately my size in a parking garage when she was in her teens and had feared taller men since then.

And guys with brown coats. ;) If she's Really short, I guess I can understand that. Average height of an American guy, bringing in Mexicans & Asians into the mix, is around 5'9". Take a 5'0" gal who isn't into "the tall" like a lot of gals are, I could see a preference for guys who are shorter but still over a half foot taller than she. But to fear guys merely 1-2" above average white male height? Weird. Has issues.
 SundayMorning88
Joined: 2/21/2018
Msg: 69
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 2/25/2018 8:44:47 PM
I was on match.com for 2 years believe me it is a big waste of money
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 4/20/2018 7:46:33 PM
I was on match.com for a month and half. It was ridiculous, they e-mail daily matches where you pick one out which takes over 30 minutes. I think it's also ridiculous to pay extra for messaging and that so called match doesn't reply without looking at the profile.
Zoosk was the same way, except there was a woman send me a message, but she wasn't my type.
is a dumb dating with all those stupid questions to the point where you can't find an exact match because they're not who you're looking for in a person. I got to meet one woman in that site. But we dated for 3 weeks and dump me after that.
I came back to POF to give it another shot.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 71
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 4/30/2018 7:54:06 AM
that is a great experiment, Danny boy, and here's a website that breaks the numbers down for us geeks:

http://www.city-data.com/

I think of the rural dairy-farm town I grew up in, and the redneck sections...and i'm shocked we're at the $100K level. Must be the damn yuppies who moved in years back. Our biggest draw is the schools that handle our students and students from local towns too small to have a high school, and retirement communities. We're just big enough to draw in a CVS, a Dunkin Donuts, and an Ace Hardware store, as far as chain stores are concerned--we even went from two gas stations down to only one. But then I drive around the area to recharge the battery in my car, and I look in peoples' yards and notice the toys--restored muscle cars or tractors, boats, Harleys, etc. And those are the places close enough to see from the road, some people have run a long access road in between the old houses and built quite a spread out in the woods behind everyone. Who knows what they have hiding out there--when I was a kid, I might have been invited over to play and find out.

Perception is an interesting thing. I used to hate that my hometown shut down by 6pm, now I love it. some places that I thought were economically destitute, are being revitalized. and other places I thought safe, are slipping. but some places, wow, they look just like they did when I left 10 years ago.

I think gals do want to have fun...its just how they define that word, that's all :)
 HanoverFella
Joined: 1/16/2018
Msg: 72
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 4/30/2018 10:34:25 AM
It’s funny how when you fill out your profile on match or our time, but don’t actually buy a subscription right away, you
Will get tons of emails and notices saying you are getting about 12 messages, pictures liked, favourited etc per day, but can only see them after you pay
...fool me once date site! Not again (shakes fist at screen) 😬
Match.com: All about the money(?)
Posted: 5/1/2018 8:50:45 PM
Sounds like a rip off.
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