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 Renaissance Man 1950
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 159
older guys younger women Page 4 of 32    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32)

don't be surprised when they dump you for a younger guy...most women in that age group are still experimenting with who they are...


No one, regardless of his/her age, should be surprised if it doesn't work out, for any number of reasons. If I had been dating teenagers, that would be one thing, but women over 25, who have been married, have had experience with dating other men.

In my experience, the women who are attracted to an older man, are attracted to the qualities that are common to the "right" older man, that are distinctively different, than men her own age. Men who are trying to act, as if they are 20 years younger, and try to "compete" with men her own age, are the men in pursuit of a fantasy, and the men who, if a younger woman responds, are responding to his money. Women, who are drawn to the "older, wiser, more understanding" man, know there's an age difference, and want/need a man who is comfortable in his own skin. It's part of the attraction.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 160
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/22/2008 4:22:39 AM
I doubt it, most younger women who are attracted to men who could be their dads have daddy issues or want monetary support. There is no denying that physically, they will be attracted to men their own age or younger, even she is 20 now and you are 40, in 20 years, she will still be youthful and sexy...you will be old, wrinkly and collecting social security. Let's not kid ourselves....these women are in it for the daddy issue and money...and you are in it because you are chasing your dwindling youth...you will be replace each other soon, these relationships are fickle.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 161
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/22/2008 4:23:51 AM
By the way, I don't know many women my age or younger who gawk at older men, we are always checking out the ones in their 20's and 30's without fail..most young women are not attracted to old(er) men. It's just the truth.
 Renaissance Man 1950
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 162
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/22/2008 10:54:38 AM

By the way, I don't know many women my age or younger who gawk at older men, we are always checking out the ones in their 20's and 30's without fail..most young women are not attracted to old(er) men. It's just the truth.


Christina, while granting your point, that women your age will "notice" men close to your age, or younger, and find them visually great to look at. Some of those women, though, look to find other needs met in a relationship with an older man.

I know, in my case, that I am in a relationship with a woman 3 years younger than you, and it's not about money. I have a decent job, but I "lost it all" between divorce, job restructure, just before a 9 month disability from an accident, when I couldn't work, and was truly poor for a time. She was in my life, at the time of the accident, and hung around then. She left, for a time, for other reasons, and had a relationship with someone closer to your age, stayed in touch with me, and then, sometime later, came back into my life.

I've had 2 other ( 1 year, 2 year) relatonships with much younger (20+years younger) women, and there's never been a time, since my divorce, when there weren't some much younger women, who let me know of their "availability."

At the same time, I have dated women close to my age. So, I'm not "single mindedly" looking for a "younger woman" as the "most important" quality. It's a different kind of relationship, and with the right people, can be very nice, but I don't see a "young woman" as an object. It all depends, and sometimes, older/younger works very well. I know of several, that are still strong after 10 years, and one, where he was 45, and she was 20, and they're still together now 30 years later, with the most harmonious and affectionate marriage I know of. She's definitely a good looking 50 year old, and I'm sure she was a "fox" in her 20s. She also finished college, and has a good job. He always had a good job, but is far from wealthy.
 friends4n0w
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 163
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/22/2008 1:09:17 PM
I respectively disagree. Men typically age better than women(sorry). If a man is reasonably attractive, women will like him regardless. But again it all depends on how a person looks after themselves. Now if you're balding,fat and wrinkled it's due to not taking care of yourself. If you happen to be in great shape, both physically and mentally, then the laws of attraction have less barriers.

Disclaimer: Simply an opinion :-)
 totalrelease
Joined: 8/13/2006
Msg: 164
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older guys younger women
Posted: 9/22/2008 1:14:58 PM
Well, i have tell you, my dad was 19yrs older then my mom and it was his second married. As for me, My first wife was 3yrs older, and my second wife was 3yrs young. But been single now for 10yrs. and youngest i've ever dated was a 20yrs between us. At the time i was 44 and she was 24yrs old. i have always carry my age well. So, when i told her my age she didn't believe me, until i pull out the Driver Lic. i really thought i wanna a younger partern, and im sure there are some young mature women out there. but in this case i had been much more mature. And im sure you figuer out the out come.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 166
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Posted: 9/22/2008 6:57:46 PM

I doubt it, most younger women who are attracted to men who could be their dads have daddy issues or want monetary support. There is no denying that physically, they will be attracted to men their own age or younger, even she is 20 now and you are 40, in 20 years, she will still be youthful and sexy...you will be old, wrinkly and collecting social security. Let's not kid ourselves....these women are in it for the daddy issue and money...and you are in it because you are chasing your dwindling youth...you will be replace each other soon, these relationships are fickle.


Completely disagree with what you said, but not that it will matter to you. While there might be some women like the ones you've described above, I've known many that have dated older men for reasons that you'd probably never understand. Ironically, I have a 21 year old that is madly in love with me and it's for none of the reasons that you listed above. Oddly enough, I have made the decision not to pursue this relationship, in spite of many people thinking I'm mad or daft for not ravishing this younger woman.

They say nature's green is gold, so obviously most men and women will check out people in their 20's. It is personality and experience that many are drawn to when they choose to date an older partner.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 170
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 11:09:09 AM
I dont agree that men age better than women....I've been to singles parties where the women all look well dressed, in shape etc...and their counterparts are mostly paunchy, losing their hair and poorly dressed. Maybe it depends on what part of the country you live in but here in South Florida, women in their 40's and 50's are definitely better looking than men in that age group. Especially women who have never had children.
 friends4n0w
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 171
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 11:45:03 AM
I think I must have moved to the wrong part of South Florida lol. Then again I have an odd attraction to Diane Keaton and major crush on Tina Fey, so go figure. Again not to belabor the point, it comes down to how a person looks after themselves. You made a point about women in there 30's being attracted more to men in there 20's or early 30's rather than men who are older. Well there is a flipside to that coin, most men that I know hardly look at women in there 30's or older, not saying myself and I think it's unfortunate. And to follow up Diane Keaton has yet to return my calls.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 172
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Posted: 9/23/2008 12:35:50 PM
Too funny! I was watching a skit on SNL the other day called the "Cougar Den". One of the hosts states that a woman's "sexual peak" is in her 40's and a guy chimes in that it's also their "beauty trench". To the woman above that believes that women age better than men, I highly doubt it. We can see through the veneer and the makeup, the push up bras, the hair dye, etc, etc. Again, it is the personality and wisdom that we would be drawn to.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 173
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 3:09:24 PM
It's funny that men think that they age better...I think both AGE and lose their youthful looks...depending on their lifestyles. Women have always been more conscious about taking care of themselves, more pressure from society to do so. Women usually are the ones dieting, eating healthier, less beer guzzling etc. Men, on the other hand are taught not to care as much about their looks and seldom see themselves for how they really are. Why else would some middle aged paunchy guy think that he deserves to date supermodels and women half his age? Most women don't think like that...they are realistic about themselves, at least more so than me. Im speaking generally, of course. An overweight man with a receding hairline still thinks he looks "good for his age", its just damn funny. Men are encouraged to forage on...regardless...
Call it a "healthier" self esteem...however, the men don't age "better" they just accept themselves better.
 Renaissance Man 1950
Joined: 7/13/2008
Msg: 174
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 3:13:29 PM
I think part of it is that women in their later 40s or 50s are the ones I "find", the ones I "approach", and therefore, the majority of women I "consider" and will have extended conversations with. The younger women have "found me". I would have felt "ridiculous" approaching, with romantic intent, the younger women with whom I've had relationships.

So, it's not really a fair comparison. When a woman has already decided that she's "interested", it's an easier, more natural dynamic, than someone I'm pursuing.

So, I'm not going to feed into the stereotyping, by demonizing women closer to my age. Some are attractive, and some aren't. Some are "reasonable", and others "have issues". By and large, though, my relationships with younger women have been better, and strong attraction more common, than with the women I've dated, who are closer to my age.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 175
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Posted: 9/23/2008 3:30:51 PM
Christina, you come from the States where people are known to be obese. Where I come from, we live a very healthy lifestyle and a large percentage of the men and women in their middle ages are not overweight. The men in their 30's and 40's look very good for their age and that's without the benefit of makeup, push up bras, hair dyes, botox, hair extensions, etc, etc. I think you if you saw those women without their makeup or clothes on, you'd see that they are no better off than the men you criticize. Don't be fooled by cosmetic enhancements, it all comes off overnight which is why so many younger men bolt after a night with a cougar. Wake up, Maggie May...lol.
 hopeful_73
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 176
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 3:36:23 PM
Eh...age is but a number to me, the older I get. Ive seen women age badly as well as men, so I dont think theres really a difference there. Like so many other things, its about how you carry yourself & how well you click with a person that counts. Personally, Ive not been attracted to anyone who was substantially older than myself, but never say never. Likewise, women much younger seem niave & childlike to me. I think if someone makes you happy, who cares what the birthdate is?
 friends4n0w
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 177
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 3:38:00 PM
Beauty is subjective and yes men naturally become more comfortable and self assured as they age. The owner of my company is in his 60's but looks nowhere close to his 60's.He takes care of himself and I see the way younger women react to him, flirtatiously and it's because he is self assured(before the obvious answer comes in, he's rich). Now take the reverse, women in there 30's(at my company) who are somewhat attractive aren't even given a second look, but the women in there 20's are. It's a bit of social experiment.

You would be surprised to know that most men take care of themselves much more these days. Most of my age group tend to wake up and go to the gym,running,boxing,sports, etc...in other words we keep in shape. It hasn't hindered our prospects. I mean look at Jay-Z, he got Beyonce, so the moral of the story is, most men should become rappers. And since Diane Keaton has yet to return my call, can you call in her place? :-)
 Robert4u2love
Joined: 1/15/2008
Msg: 179
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/23/2008 8:01:55 PM
I have only one thing to say on this subject. When women date younger men they call them "Cougars" and when men date younger women they call them "Perverts".
This is a sure fire sign that women want it all their way and criticize men for the very same thing that they do. Older men dating younger women is widely accepted in many countries outside the United States, however here in the USA we are subject to much scrutiny and criticism by women who want it all "their way". I feel that most men prefer a woman to his age or younger, this is the norm. Unless you are young and seeking a MILF. In the end the only people that need be concerned are the 2 facing each other.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 181
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 3:02:44 AM
Hey tick tock...Im not sure where you come from but I've traveled extensively and the men in other countries look even worse..missing teeth (Britain), although that applies to the women too. Im not just talking about men being obese, im talking about you men being UNREALISTIC. You dont age better than women....and the majority of women do not get surgical enhancements. Some of you men need push up bras...don't you think gravity affects you too? Check out your moobies and saggy butts, worse yet...NO BUTT. Do not kid yourself, you too will get gray, saggy, wrinkly...if men really aged better than why do they die younger? Check out any nursing home...the men look just as old and decayed as the women.
 HarDayKnight
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 183
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 6:51:26 AM
christinaFromBoca77,


I've heard women my whole life complain that men age better than women. Not all men do, and not all women age poorly. It comes down to physical fitness. Over the years, men have been more active physically. (Especially early in life.) This seems to be changing over the past 10-15 years or so. I see more women taking good care of their bodies and working out often. It's still true that men age better, on average, but not nearly as true as it used to be. Living longer is another issue entirely. Women, who have been in the work force their entire adult lives, tend to die sooner than women who have lived less stressful lives. The gap between men and women is closing where longevity is concerned.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 184
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 8:14:50 AM
Harvey, you sound logical and quite smart.

One thing that I'd like to add is that most of it boils down to good genetics. There are people who work out everyday and still will not age as well as others who NEVER work out. It doesnt matter what sex you are....some of us are just incredibly genetically gifted. Look at how long your grandparents lived...how strong were their bodies and minds? I live a very low stress life, I have a history of longevity in my family as well as quick metabolisms. Im just gifted like that.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 185
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Posted: 9/24/2008 8:46:42 AM
Christina, you have managed to sidetrack this conversation nicely. As a woman, you should know better since you know how much work you women have to put in to create the illusion of beauty. Every day you have to spend some time to apply your face and this process only increases as you age. In other words, women only appear to age better to you because they attempt to cover up their aging process with vats of makeup and dye. It would be funny to take 10 women and 10 men in their 40's and not let anyone apply any form of cosmetics for a month and see which group looks older by the end. Pretty sure I know the answer to that one.

As for men aging worse because they "die younger", that's just silly. The old men you referred to in the nursing homes lived in a time when men were the only breadwinners and had to bust their arse to provide for their families. Times have changed now and we'll see what toll that being in the workplace will have on women's life expectancy. Already we are seeing some of the adverse affects, like an increasing number of women taking up smoking. Time will tell.
 friends4n0w
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 186
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 9:06:11 AM
TickTock is correct, as statistics point to higher obesity rates among those in the states versus those in other countries. And I for one will not get gray,saggy or wrinkly as I have purchased a hyperbaric chamber. I'm actually typing this response from within the hyperbaric chamber, as it comes equipped with wi-fi access.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 187
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 9:25:27 AM
The only thing I do is brush my hair and put on some lipstick and a touch of blush. I don't dye my hair, I dont use foundation or any gooey camouflaging type makeup. Im not hiding the aging process or care to....I come from a family of women who have good skin. I live healthy, I barely drink, never use drugs, stay out of the sun etc. Im also a healthy eater. The best way to look good is to live healthy, not cover it up...that doesnt work anyway....be real. Cosmetics do not hide anyone's age...so you need another argument. Maybe you are mad because you can't wear them..and being that you sent me your pics...you look like an older man, one with a sagging face. Im sorry, I call it how I see it.

Women do live longer than men....whether they work just as hard or not...its a metabolism issue...women are smaller...in general. Men have a faster heart rate. More muscle mass, more body weight. Fact. Stop trying to deny science.
 HarDayKnight
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 188
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 9:40:58 AM
christinafromboca77,

I have to cut you some slack. I've been to Florida many times, and my mother and sister live there. Good looking women far outnumber the decent looking men there. (Maybe some soap and water would help.) How that happened, I don't know. My sis complains about it all the time. She can't wait to get back to NC... Where the reverse seems to be true.

I'm thinking about trading places with her. Not that I expect to improve the gene pool or anything. lol
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 189
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Posted: 9/24/2008 10:46:55 AM
Yes Christina, I sent the pictures that you requested when you emailed me cause you were upset and wanted to see my pictures to back up my statements in the forums. Too funny! Lol! Funny you should say that when I look younger than any woman or man that graduated with me from my high school. Tsk tsk...never let anger shroud your judgement.

Anyway, as for your comment about what you wear in terms of makeup and cosmetics, you are obviously not the norm and you do not represent the majority of women out there. They do wear all of these things, hence the multibillion dollar industry that caters to women. I don't get what your point was? That would be like me saying that I'm not overweight nor do I have a beer belly so you have no argument about middle age men being overweight. Also, I did say in one of my previous posts that the cosmetic enhancements doesn't really hide a woman's age...it helps by knocking off a few years, but it is still is obvious they are older. Read carefully before you comment.

As for women outliving men, that has been the case because men have traditionally worked while women stayed home. Now that we are seeing women entering the workforce in almost equal numbers, it will be interesting to see how that changes in the future. If you truly understood science, you would understand that these are all contributing factors and that statistics can change over time and that this debate has yet to be determined.


Cheers,

Tick

PS. Well...I'm off on my trip, but can't wait to see what other absurd statements you'll make when I return on Monday.
 christinaFromBoca77
Joined: 9/10/2008
Msg: 190
older guys younger women
Posted: 9/24/2008 11:43:59 AM
Tick Tock...your ticking has tocked. Be real, I've seen men you're age who put you to shame. You look like Ghandi with hair albeit before he died.

Yes, women use makeup..it's part of being female..and it's their personal choice. Maybe you should use alittle to cover up those wrinkles. Better yet, try some Strivectin...I hear that stuff works.

So, where is your trip...or is it time for you to run back into your cave and hide?
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