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Show ALL Forums  > Broken Hearts  > Left heartbroken and confused      Home login  
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 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 26
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Left heartbroken and confusedPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
That's nice of your sister to take you in and for friends to donate furniture. Sounds like you have a nice family and really nice supportive friends. You're without female companionship for the moment, but do have good friends. Some people end up with no friends, so you're ahead of the game. Think about how lucky you are to have this support system, and try not to focus on the negative. This is an opportunity to meet someone nicer!
 dpwesu
Joined: 3/25/2013
Msg: 27
Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 3/24/2018 5:48:42 AM

Sadly I got the answers today at the court house. She had been secretly involved with her ex while claiming to be at work picking up extra shifts. She used me as the maid who would clean, cook and give foot rubs everyday after her job ended. Providing whatever she wanted financially. While she was receiving attention from the other guy. She told me that she left so I could truly be happy with someone who deserves me. And she hopes I have a good life elsewhere.

It's far from a satifactory answer but it's better than the BS I only wanted my wedding dress excuse she was giving me for the past little while. But if that's reality than that's what it is.


Wow......that is just unreal.....not to mention very very sad.

But I am very glad you have a good place to stay, a new place in 2 months, and also some furnishings to help. Sounds like you have a great support system backing you.

Well as far as your soon to be ex wife......don't be too surprised that in time, the "relationship" she has with her "secret ex" blows up in her face. More often than not, when exes try to get back together......within a year they are broken up again because the same issues that broke them up in the first place have a way of resurfacing. Trust me on this.

And don't be too surprised if she tries to come knocking on your door wanting back in. Whatever you do....for God's sake and yours don't let her back in.

My own ex did this very same thing after the one he left me for, left him. He came back desperate because he was alone, had nobody to lean on, and he all of a sudden wanted a family with me. Needless to say, I told him to go take a hike.

What comes around goes around and what goes around comes around.

In time, karma will take care of her. Now whether or not you see it first hand, or from a distance, matters not. But it will happen.

In the meantime, take your time to get back on your feet, take things slow, do what you can, in spite of your limitations with the migraines you seem to be able to do a lot of things. - So get out there and don't look back. You CAN do it!

This is your chance to start over. You have a huge world to go explore.

Create the life YOU want and LIVE IT WELL.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 28
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 3/24/2018 6:10:18 AM
It would be unfair for you to date others right now. You are too wounded.
 PollyR107
Joined: 4/8/2016
Msg: 29
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 3/24/2018 3:38:03 PM
I am very sorry to hear about what you're going through, OP. It's just cruel and unfair. But at least, this will open up an opportunity for the right person to come into your life, the one who's worth waiting for.

I agree with the above post that it's probably not quite the right time for you to start dating or a new relationship. Please think hard before getting another woman involved right now. The last thing you want to do is the hurt another person who might be seriously looking for a relationship that you aren't ready for.

Good luck.
 1EndorphinJunkie
Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 30
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/19/2018 10:02:06 AM
I disagree. To my mind, she's not even a friend. Because a good friend, much less a best friend, wouldn't pull this crap on you. You knew each other for 5 years before marriage. Thinking back on it now, did she give you any signs at all?
Some people are really up on their game. As a disabled person, I often get approached by romance scammers. I've passed most tests with flying colors; but then there was that one that was really up on his game. And I was emotionally vulnerable.
I think a lot of us on this and similar sites are vulnerable. And we're all gathered together in this one place, just waiting, it seems, for predators to pick us off. It sucks.
 1EndorphinJunkie
Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 31
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/19/2018 10:02:21 AM
I disagree. To my mind, she's not even a friend. Because a good friend, much less a best friend, wouldn't pull this crap on you. You knew each other for 5 years before marriage. Thinking back on it now, did she give you any signs at all?
Some people are really up on their game. As a disabled person, I often get approached by romance scammers. I've passed most tests with flying colors; but then there was that one that was really up on his game. And I was emotionally vulnerable.
I think a lot of us on this and similar sites are vulnerable. And we're all gathered together in this one place, just waiting, it seems, for predators to pick us off. It sucks.
 1EndorphinJunkie
Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 32
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/19/2018 10:07:51 AM
Amen.
Like me, I don't have anyone but personal support workers who come in once a day to shower and dress me because of my other disabilities not related to blindness.
Seems everyone I ever loved either died or moved away. I don't have any family or friends near to support me in any way physically.
I can talk to my best friend on the phone. But I live in constant loneliness. A lot of people won't date folks with one disability, let alone disability plus illness.
I'm grateful for PSW's and such. But the last time I had any affectionate touch, besides one date where a guy came and went, and still won't talk to me, was a long time ago. I don't even have a cat.
The animal shelter denied me adoption. The only darn thing I need, I can't get. I feel vulnerable and needy.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 33
Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/19/2018 11:28:53 AM
You'd benefit from a group living situation. Advertise for another disabled person to be roommates with. Companionship is important and there are many others in the same boat. I work in home care and I see it all the time. So many lonely people living alone. Some people who live alone are not lonely, they are content but they have outlets to get their psychological needs met. Seeing all the lonely people who live alone really affects the way I see things in life. I do not want to be alone once my kids are all up and out.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 34
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/19/2018 9:00:06 PM
It's been 2 months since OP started this topic. Hopefully, the annulment is progressing.
 BBEisBack
Joined: 9/16/2015
Msg: 35
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/20/2018 4:59:35 AM
How did the OP find the Forums so quick? When was His join date, vs the first post?

Questions one thinks of, in these Forums......
 _Rise_Above_This_
Joined: 1/14/2018
Msg: 36
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 5/20/2018 5:40:58 AM
^^^

1. He looked behind his couch

2. about 12 days
 lulz567
Joined: 7/6/2018
Msg: 37
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 7/13/2018 6:14:47 PM
Yep sounds to me like she probably wanted, when she married you, to bring it up yourself starting a family, after five years got fed up and realised it was on her to suggest it,so thinks the relationship hasn’t worked out. Women want men to be psychic and assertive and sooner men get that, the better their relationships will unfold. All may not be lost though. Be assertive and say you really want a family too and you wanted it with her for a long time but didn’t want to frighten her off. Just lie good
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 38
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Left heartbroken and confused
Posted: 7/13/2018 8:13:07 PM
To be left heartbroken and confused, perhaps even used and maybe abused, at least as far as your feelings are concerned , is sure enough a drag.

Just be glad you have not yet had a baby, Make no attempt to do so, and I don't mean maybe. Keep it in your pants, and make no advance, to have a child with this woman, I'd say.

At least, that is how I see things.


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