Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 6/7/2016
Msg: 26
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a GirlPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Lol, calm down my dears.
The youngsters can text with both thumbs, frantic but in sync. They can talk, walk, etc while texting! I’m in awe with my one finger prod.
Gives me a chuckle when older folks moan about fb, it’s a young persons thing really, created for them. Mark Z hates the likes of me who barely participate.

Goooooaaaaallll
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 27
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/23/2018 8:28:15 AM
I have no problems with Facebook. "Friending" on Facebook has become the equivalent of exchanging numbers today, and Facebook is even funnier than this nuthouse. This has nothing to do with that, though. This is about not acting like a desperate fool.

The only person who wants a desperate fool is another desperate fool.
 sun___flower
Joined: 5/8/2015
Msg: 28
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/23/2018 1:11:16 PM
Pig
Ok, if you were willing to endure all of the alleged "texting like a fiend", it made you *both* desperate.


The only person who wants a desperate fool is another desperate fool.

+1
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 29
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/23/2018 9:47:28 PM
I'm saying he had things he could do if he had spare time. He was home a lot due to being on call, so he did have a lot of downtime where he couldn't do much. I don't see texting as being desperate like you do. Maybe it's your one way of making believe you're in control, by saying no texting. After putting women off, it doesn't leave you anything to be in control of.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 30
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/24/2018 3:58:04 AM
With this she either sounds, uninterested, boring or unflirtatious or a mixture xD

Yeah probably actually because they don't know how they feel about you so they allow you to do that to see. Assume she didn't find you completely repulsive or she would of rejected those moves.

Ok at this point you're kind of seeming like way interested than she is maybe. Things are actually pretty casual between you two, you had only 1 date. Yeah I agree with mustang ATM you are casual entertainment to her pretty much.

Dude you had one date, she hardly knows you.
She isn't about to stop talking to everyone else for that.
Unless I mean if you had built some really intense connection of some sort online or irl lol.
It CAN happen. Just at this point with the amount you are talking and the way you interact, it is super casual.

She probably thought you were not interested because you didn't kiss her.
There are other things you can do apart from holding hands like stroking her face or arm/random areas.
 jco415
Joined: 1/4/2017
Msg: 31
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/24/2018 8:56:04 AM
Games, Games, Games, Drama, Drama, Drama...
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 32
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 9:34:15 AM


I'm saying he had things he could do if he had spare time. He was home a lot due to being on call, so he did have a lot of downtime where he couldn't do much.


You said he was "busy", then you said he "texted like a fiend". Sorry, but I find it a bit difficult for these two things to co-exist.



I don't see texting as being desperate like you do. Maybe it's your one way of making believe you're in control, by saying no texting. After putting women off, it doesn't leave you anything to be in control of.


Are you actually reading anything I'm saying here or are you just bored and need for this continue? Do you think I give one flying shit about "putting women off"? They come back (because I passed the shit test) after they're "put off", and I tell them to "f*ck off".

Make no mistake, I am in control.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 33
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 10:39:55 AM

TPOYD
I have no problems with Facebook. "Friending" on Facebook has become the equivalent of exchanging numbers today

Sorry, but I have to take issue with this. Friending on Facebook is more closely equivalent to exchanging cell phones rather than just exchanging numbers.


We already knew that Donald Trump Jr.’s wife Vanessa reportedly confronted Danity Kane singer and former Celebrity Apprenticecontestant Aubrey O’Day about her alleged affair with the president’s son. But now, we also know how Vanessa apparently found out about the whole thing in the first place: She reportedly found “sexy texts” on Don Jr.’s phone while he was in the shower.

People reports the affair came to an “abrupt end” in 2012 after Vanessa made the discovery. Don Jr. left his phone on the bedside table one day while he was in the shower, at which point some “sexy texts” (which is scientifically known as “sexts,” we believe) from O’Day reportedly came through.

For christ’s sake people, put a lock code on your cell phone!!!
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 34
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 12:58:55 PM

Friending on Facebook is more closely equivalent to exchanging cell phones rather than just exchanging numbers.


Think of it as "replacement", then. Women tend to ask for my Facebook more than they do my number these days.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 35
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 1:06:46 PM
^^which makes perfect sense. If you want to know the real person, look at what they put on FB. If the person doesn't make the mistake of putting TMI there, then their friends will do it. whereas over a phone...we can lie our ass off.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 36
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 1:57:10 PM
It would have to be something really extreme for them to truly freak out because most simply don't care about the other mundane shit. Many of them ask about Facebook because in their mind it feels different than asking for a guy's number.

Same thing with actually going out. They will mention an event coming, then say "we should go to that" rather than directly saying "would you like to go with me?" To them, it doesn't *feel* like asking a guy out.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 37
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/25/2018 2:16:32 PM
Pig, I understand what you''re saying, but I don't agree. He's busy mostly because of his job not giving him downtime, but during work and being on call, he had a lot of free time where he was sitting around. When he went to OR to visit his family, he texted while stuck in traffic. While I don't prefer too much texting with dates, it was spaced out. I had no reason to go hard@ss on him, because he texted a bit too much. Sometimes you go along with someone's schedule and have flexibility. It's part of getting along.

I don't get too personal on FB. People forget it's not private, even with privacy settings. My personal life is too personal to put on FB.

Henry, I found out my ex was writing "stuff" to an old gf back east, because he left his message page up. Some people are just @ssholes. You really don't need seeing cell phone or FB messages to confirm that. I can't agree about secrecy thru passwords. No one should have anything to hide, and there's no excuse for cheating. They should be found out and dumped. Men need to man up and stay single if they want to date around.

I just remembered his track phone. He said he got it for reception on the coast in the wilderness. Unfortunately, he messed up there too. He left it home, and a message came in from his ex. I used it to call her back, so then she could explain to her husband why the phone keeps ringing. It was a great way to use up his remaining minutes, lol.
 ThePigOfYourDreams
Joined: 6/30/2017
Msg: 38
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/26/2018 4:17:41 AM

Pig, I understand what you''re saying, but I don't agree. He's busy mostly because of his job not giving him downtime, but during work and being on call, he had a lot of free time where he was sitting around. When he went to OR to visit his family, he texted while stuck in traffic. While I don't prefer too much texting with dates, it was spaced out. I had no reason to go hard@ss on him, because he texted a bit too much. Sometimes you go along with someone's schedule and have flexibility. It's part of getting along.


Blah, blah, blah....don't care. You were both two desperate fools engaging in what was par for the course.

No man of significant value should ever have unnecessary text conversations to fill up the time between the first date and seeing her again. Ever. Period. He will friend zone himself. I know you and others want to believe it helps with building a "bond", but it doesn't.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 39
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/26/2018 6:49:12 AM
"Many of them ask about Facebook because in their mind it feels different than asking for a guy's number."

>>>good point, I was thinking it allows a woman seeking a "deeper connection" with a partner, to feel like she's seeing more of him and his social network and what he thinks when his guard is down and et cetera, than she would "see" in a phone call.
 flyover_boy
Joined: 12/28/2016
Msg: 40
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/26/2018 10:50:25 AM
Blloo...

You’re a good looking guy, so I’m going to assume, she is a fine looking lady. With that, let’s further assume she’s getting showered with attention. Not just in the little POF world, or just online, but IRL and even in the business world. Smiles, doors opening, playful flirtations, even from married men...you get the drill. You’re not competing for affections just from other 20-something guys, but from men well beyond; accomplished, distinguished and well established older men. Which you may join their ranks in a couple of decades. She may very well be in the zenith of her dating life. Life is blissful...for now.

Not that we all haven’t gone through these mix/crazy signals, particularly in our 20‘s. Take and process the advice as you see fit here. Although a guy like you looks to me as one to be GIVING advice, not asking.

Personally, at my age, I have no patience at all from these coy games by my contemporaries. Divorced women my age, often, are more direct. Sure, the kiss in the parking lot is a sign...but that can go to some horns too, venturing into rated ‘R’ and beyond...if you will. We’re not in high school anymore.

I don’t want to blow away a good deal for you. I don’t know if she’s worth this aggravation or not. That’s your call. Be sure you are also fishing in other parts of your pond, and try other lakes at the same time too.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 3/23/2018
Msg: 41
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/26/2018 5:12:21 PM
If the only thing she’s asking you is “Hi, how r u?” and you’re always the one who has to come up with a smart, witty reply, that shows that she isn’t making an effort to be interesting herself. What do you see in her? She must be hot if she doesn’t have to prove to you that she has a brain.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 42
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 3/27/2018 8:46:24 AM
If she took the initiative to text you after the date, you did well.

When she texted you after the date, that means she likes you and is interested in another date. You should have set a date right then. Set a date once a week as a general rule in the beginning, unless she asks you out sooner.

All the texting and phone calls before the date were unnecessary though. Set the date and then leave her alone. This is part of playing hard to get. If she's truly interested, she'll be wondering what you are doing, and that means she's thinking about you, and girls only think a lot about a guy she likes.

And make sure you kiss her within the first 3 dates or so.

It's only one date, it takes a couple months of dating for it to be solid, so it's a long road, so don't take it so seriously....... relax more. Plus, young women can be flaky. If this is not the one, there will be another.
 Tech30
Joined: 8/11/2017
Msg: 43
view profile
History
Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl
Posted: 4/9/2018 9:56:50 AM
Stop with all the texting. After a date. You can send one saying you had a good time and want to see her again.

Later in the week suggest a time and day and activity. Dont text everyday. After the first date you should start calling her to make plans.

Also if you don text all the time like other guys are most likely doing, she wonders why you dont and maybe you have other options. Women cant resist competition.

Be busy. Why do you have so much time to text all week? Nothing to do? boring.
I like to keep busy becuase I just like doing stuff. It helps when a girl asks how my week was and instead of saying ah i worked and watched movies....

I usually have more to say. I went to the gym, went to work, fought in a Muay thai event , booked a trip to california for work for two weeks from now.

Then you ask what she did..... boring usual stuff. Which is fine, dont let on that its boring. Women are drawn to men that are more interesting than they are .

When you talk about work, dont make it sound boring. Make it sound like youre the go to guy at work. Even if you're not.
It helps if you're a go getter and make moves, but if not, you can embellish a little.

You're a good looking guy , but you seem to lack the confidence to go with it. You should be able to walk into a room with a girl and know you're in control and you're comfortable.

As others have mentioned , go for the kiss. If you dont , she will lose interest. If you do then you either get the kiss or know shes not interested. Its a win win situation. If you get shy and dont go for it, its lose lose.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Keeping Attraction going & Weeks W/ a Girl