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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?      Home login  
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 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 126
Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?Page 6 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
If you cant find a bf, earning money as an escort isnt so bad.

At least you’re getting paid
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 127
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/24/2018 7:22:43 PM

Did you hire the escort yet? How did it go?


I got the idea for this thread from an old poster called Sigunks a few years back who said he did the same thing. If you look a few pages back in this thread, I mentioned that I’m not doing it. At least for now I don’t need any attention from women if I involve myself in other activities. It seems to be that if you put yourself out there and don’t have success in dating you get branded as a “beta male.” If give up on dating you get branded as a “beta MGTOW male.” You just can’t win.

Reverand’s philosophy seems to be, “Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?” Well hey, if it works for him, why debate the matter further?
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 128
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/24/2018 7:51:11 PM
Are you still working in that factory? Are you working?
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 129
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Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?
Posted: 4/24/2018 8:01:43 PM
Yes, not exactly cushy work - hard physical labor lifting boxes and sorting parcels. It’s not what I envioned with post secondary degree, but why do you want to know about my job on a dating forum?
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 130
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Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?
Posted: 4/24/2018 8:17:51 PM
I'm sure you work hard. I think you should concentrate on getting a better job, one on par with your intelligence. If you enjoy repetitive work (if you do), find something that's also repetitive in nature.

I'm saying that for 2 reasons, one being for yourself to make more, maybe feel more fulfilled at work. Secondly, yes, a decent job is attractive.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 131
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Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?
Posted: 4/24/2018 8:40:27 PM
I don’t think that people who work manual labor jobs are any less intelligent than white collar workers. If you took somebody who works in an office an put them in a chaotic warehouse environment were they had to sort out thousands of packages they might screw it up and send it to the wrong place. People with PhDs may be complete idiots in anything other than their field of study. Yes a decent job is attractive, but I’m sure there are women in my situation too. There are still my financial equals out there that I could date, if women are willing to date their equals.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 132
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Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?
Posted: 4/24/2018 8:59:19 PM
I agree with you about intelligence and that theory, to an extent. I'm thinking you can earn more, but I know there are jobs requiring a degree, even a ph.d, that don't pay well. The more money you make, the sooner you can retire. It would be a win, win, win situation.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 133
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 1:09:16 AM

Reverand’s philosophy seems to be, “Why buy a cow when you can get free milk?” Well hey, if it works for him, why debate the matter further?

If you want to see women as cows to be exploited go for it. Just going to say it's not a very 'respectful' or caring view of women.
If you want someone to value you and treat you with kindness and affection, generally you bring that out by treating them the same way.
Lots of good women will friend zone you as well because they know it is a bad mentality for a guy to have. Trust me I have friend zoned so many guys who wanted to date me just because they suggested sex or fwb with me. It's just unnatractive. Why would I want some guy who is interested in using me if he can? women aren't stupid, we know the game and the rules.
The kind of women who would accept it would probably try to exploit you in return
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 134
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 1:39:51 AM

I'm not disagreeing that someone can be happy without a relationship. People find companionship in having pets, doing volunteer work, becoming a nun and so forth. Swine, are you truly single and happy about it?

Being locked in a Relationship doesn't mean lack of company. In fact, for some, it can be quite the contrary. I think you're people being in the same boat; it's not. I understand from Your POV -- juggling kids, saving up money and living with mom, etc. -- yes, being with a guy in and of itself brings value to you. But when one is 100% independent, it's a whole different ballgame.

I have had a good marriage but I realize the odds are against me for that to happen again..at my age.

But you're only 64, not 77. And very nice looking @64, so if you live in a well-populated area (or right next to one), I couldn't see how a fruitful LTR would be much harder than an average Jane @44. That said, when we enjoy being single & independent and like it that way, without surrounded by delicious options, sure, the odds are 'against' us for getting into an LTR.

If you look a few pages back in this thread, I mentioned that I’m not doing it. At least for now I don’t need any attention from women if I involve myself in other activities.

I wouldn't go the sexless/just-a-date escort route for attention -- but for "batting practice" going out On a date. Both aren't worth the money, but for just the mere attention, it's a lot more of a ripoff. :)

It seems to be that if you put yourself out there and don’t have success in dating you get branded as a “beta male.” If give up on dating you get branded as a “beta MGTOW male.” You just can’t win.

If you don't have success in the dating field you're not necessarily a beta male, no. If you're not having any success, one needs to let go of their stubbornness and their gut instincts, and "reboot", open to re-learn perspective by reading up and/or following thru with peers (best way). Kind of like someone going to the gym and getting a personal trainer -- not for an upcoming wedding in 2 months, but to change their body sculpt. Even if not so necessary to that extent, many times it's the only way to Change. And it's pretty good to do, to boot.

I don’t think that people who work manual labor jobs are any less intelligent than white collar workers.

I think what she was saying (at least what I agree with) is that since you are a decently smart guy -- aim higher, where it's more viable. Yes, a multitude of guys white collar are not smarter than a multitude of guys doing manual labor. Despite that, the smartest 20% doing manual labor as a life-long career VS smartest 20% of white collar as a life-long career -- one clearly wins out, IMO. The smarter guys who are relatively young are going to take steps up higher. It's a smart move, too. :)
 reverendswine
Joined: 4/14/2018
Msg: 135
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 6:41:39 AM
Well, there you have it, Kiss. Sienna knows more about attracting women than I do, and as she said, you need to trust her.

 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 136
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 6:47:38 AM

Well, there you have it, Kiss. Sienna knows more about attracting women than I do, and as she said, you need to trust her.

Duude your comment was to attract them just to have sex with them. There is a big difference between that and actually giving a damn and wanting something serious.
If he just wants sex and nothing serious that is his prerogative but it won't be any easier than looking for a relationship.
Plus it is unattractive to many women if a guy is just wanting to use us for sex, ya know.
My boyfriend didn't win my heart by treating me like a cow that he just wanted milk from ;)
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 137
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:10:28 AM
Sienna, I was quoting Elvis. Are you questioning the king’s tact with women?
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 138
Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:29:23 AM

Being locked in a Relationship doesn't mean lack of company. In fact, for some, it can be quite the contrary. I think you're people being in the same boat; it's not. I understand from Your POV -- juggling kids, saving up money and living with mom, etc. -- yes, being with a guy in and of itself brings value to you. But when one is 100% independent, it's a whole different ballgame.


True, I can't disagree. Now that I'm tied down, I have no freedom to enjoy. When I was younger, in my late teens, early 20s, not being in a relationship didn't bug me so much. When you are independent (without kids) you have a whole lot more free time to go out and do things you want and I had a lot of friends around too so I wasn't lacking in companionship and I did date too then, but I never got serious with anyone and was okay with it. But at a certain point, when my friends started to drop like flies, moving away to be with their men, or still being around with babies and/or boyfriends/husbands, I started to not like being single anymore. And now that I'm in my 30s and single, I'm finding most people around here are all attached and when I go to things with the kids and I'm alone, I start to get down on myself for it. And not having any close friends in the same area makes it worse. I tried joining a rec soccer league but too many girls a decade younger and I felt like an old person in comparison. And I joined a Tops chapter, a weight loss group but all the members are my mom's age and older. And I volunteered for a church ladies group because I figured why the hell not but they are all way older too. Even if I didn't have kids right now I still would probably find being single no fun because what does a person do for fun when not in their 20s anymore other then dating?
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 139
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 2:17:58 PM
"What does a person not in their 20's, do for fun anymore?"

>>>I would say, "do what they did when in their 20's", but for a lot, it was grab a red Solo cup and belly up to the keg. Otherwise, hopefully they have hobbies, and being older, have more disposable income to invest in their hobbies.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 140
Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 3:02:08 PM
Yeah, I guess disposable income is a problem. I had a lot more money when I was in my 20s then now. Yet I make way more money now then I used to. There's a lot of things I could afford to do but then there's the added expense of paying a babysitter. I'm really trying to figure out how to make friends with other single moms with kids. That way maybe we can hang out and talk while the kids play. I've asked a couple people to come on a walk with me and the kids in the evening but they are always busy.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 141
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 8:09:02 PM
There’s always going to be people who due to disabilities or social ineptitude may never get to experience physical intimacy. I know of a guy with a disability who’s parents were afraid for his sanity if he never got laid. They ended up hiring somebody to help him with that. The issue of escorts does not seem black and white to me. I don’t think every guy who pays for sex is a douche.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 142
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/25/2018 10:39:50 PM
July, Maybe the ladies don't want to walk, and would do other things or they just want to have downtime where they rest from the day's activities. It's too bad you don't have meetup groups near you. Someone is always up for something. Is there a way to connect with other moms? My divorced friend with a kid goes out for drinks and/or dinner with friends, but it's when the ex has him. If your kids calm down, your mom may not mind being left with them. That would be a goal that could help you.

Kiss, pros are disgusting, I don't care if they're high end or not. Why can't this guy with a disability use a prosthetic? https://www.adameve.com/adult-sex-toys/male-masturbators-ch-1006.aspx
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 143
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 1:24:13 AM

True, I can't disagree. Now that I'm tied down, I have no freedom to enjoy.

To make a key correction on my first sentence, I meant to say "Being locked in a Relationship doesn't mean you're NOT lacking company anymore. In fact, for some, it can be quite the contrary."

Basically, many people locked in a Relationship are having Less social experiences than when they weren't. A motive To find "being with someone" as having value in and of itself, is because of loneliness in certain ways. It's increased when one's social life has been drab -- and also increased when their dating life has been frustrating/dull/empty, too. But when it's Not, and one's not juggling any children, and are 100% independent -- that's what I mean by a whole different ballgame.

Someone who has negative feelings about the single/dating world or doesn't have much of a in-person interactive fun social life, saying the Single life sucks -- that's as silly as a guy in a bad relationship saying Relationships suck. Is the grass greener on one side VS the other? Depends what you're watering your lawn with.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 144
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 2:52:46 AM

Kiss, pros are disgusting, I don't care if they're high end or not. Why can't this guy with a disability use a prosthetic?


Let him who has not sinned cast the first stone. Prosthetics can’t replace the desire for actual human intimacy.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 145
Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 8:14:20 AM
When I was 25, before I was in my longterm relationship my social life was pretty busy. I was still in university (working on a second degree), I hung out with friends quite a bit and generally did a lot of things. But after I got into my long term relationship my social life slowly started to dissipate until it was pretty miniscule. My life was my kids and my ex was insecure about me going anywhere without him and all my friends and family disliked him. However, even though I lacked the feeling of companionship, after we were split, I missed having someone in bed with me at night, I missed cooking nice meals for someone who liked my cooking, I missed watching shows like Vikings and The Originals, having someone who watched my kids so I could do simple things like taking a bath or going for a bike ride or going grocery shopping. A bunch of little stuff. Even bad relationships have certain things about them that you miss.

NewYorker58, my mom does watch my kids at times while I'm at work but she's made it clear she won't for social things, she has a social life of her own. My kids have actually been good for her when I'm not around. When I'm around they seem to turn into gremlins and this is despite the fact that I've always disciplined them and stuff. So I just have to pay a babysitter if I want to go do something but I feel guilty doing that. I am rather envious at times of other single moms who have an active social life when their kids are at their dad's. I'm never going to get that option.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 146
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 8:44:33 AM
college campuses are great, b/c there's so many singles to choose from. If one person drinks too much to be a friend, or is too lame, or to *whatever*, then there's a thousand more to choose from. and there's a ton of events going on for those four months of a semester, so going out for an event in the middle of winter doesn't require driving all over to find it. (I'm thinking about blowing off an event this weekend I used to go to, as i'm busy trying to shepard two cars into my driveway and just don't feel as connected to the old places I used to go).

http://daffodilfest.com/entertainment/live-music/

I have a married friend here in this sorta red neck town who's former New York theatre worker, can't find artsy fartsy friends, and so we hang out once a week when i'm not busy. I think her husband's good with it b/c he's more into comic books than art, so I get to play release valve :) when we get older and get into small towns, we find a lot of people who have cocooned into their lives. its easy enough to buy an entertainment center for the home and not leave. When we were younger, we'd do anything to get out of our parents' house or tiny city apartment.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 147
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 12:36:34 PM

When I was 25, before I was in my longterm relationship my social life was pretty busy.

It can be, notably younger... or post-divorce, kids out of the house, and have a new S.O. who likes going out and has social connections.

My point is -- many Don't. Just as many NOT in one don't, either. People make the false-association that not being in a Relationship = empty/shallow because of their experiences being empty/shallow. But you can get the same IN a relationship too, as many do. For at least some time, people Don't want a fruitful social life, as they're raising kids, or conditioned to want to live out in the country a bit and sitting on their porch, etc -- and without Someone, they will feel more empty because they're not getting it from the "real world".

In the end, one's tastes vary. Being single can be more fruitful than being in an LTR, and vice versa. Either by itself is neither bad or good, empty or full. It depends what you make of it.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 148
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 2:23:09 PM

Disney-World psychology, really?

There are many good relationships that stay good throughout many years. What has strengthened them is the ability they had to withstand the hard times. I know way to many old couples in loving relationships to keep the pessimistic views I once had. And I've seen a lot of people in their dying days, holding their spouses hand or taking care of them through things like Alzheimer's, MS and cancer. Yes, I've seen my share of long-together couples who are miserable but I am constantly amazed by the couples who love each other deeply and care for each other to the end. And it's not Disney-World. It's real life, as real as it gets.



- absolutely! Unfortunately, a lot of the crazies on this site don't get that.

That said, I do think it's good to visit reality, a balanced perspective is important; yes, there are plenty of divorces and breakups. And it's better to be single than in a bad relationship.

listen to julystorm7

I'll tell you something else - one of the three main ingredients for a person to be a good catch is a good attitude.





No. I am not happy about it. I don't have to answer to anyone, put up with their bullshit, have control of my own time, and can date who I want, when I want.


- I don't have to answer to someone when in a relationship - mostly, lol!



It seems to be that if you put yourself out there and don’t have success in dating you get branded as a “beta male.” If give up on dating you get branded as a “beta MGTOW male.” You just can’t win.


- yes, there are lots of angry and crazy people in this world - and you don't have to listen to them. Stop worrying about what people think of you - no matter how great you are (and you are), there will always be naysayers. Ignore them and be your own person. Forget about trends - you be the trend-setter.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 149
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/26/2018 5:10:09 PM
Kiss, maybe the parents, namely the father, thinks the guy needs human intimacy thru sex. It's a curious subject. I know disabled people's parents that would not ever think to supply their kids with bodies for sex. Then you're back to the flipside of that coin, intimacy with no intimacy, because it's just getting off. You don't need a person for that experience.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 150
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Should I hire an escort to wine and dine?
Posted: 4/27/2018 3:13:49 AM
^^^ Women don’t need another person to get off. I guess that’s why they spend more money on sex toys than men. Men are visual. Just a sex toy with no visual stimulation could never do it for me. Why is a man seeing an escort any more disgusting than a woman who has casual sex?
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