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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met o      Home login  
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 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 26
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Last week, I was talking to a woman on Tinder or Bumble, whichever. Tuesday evening, about 8, I get a message from her about we should meet. I reply immediately,


Sounds good. How about tomorrow evening, 7:15 p.m., at ______. Very quaint place, and close to where you live. We can have a casual dinner and conversation.

Wednesday, around 10 p.m., about 27 hours later, she replies,


Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.

So I have to break the bad news, I asked you for Wednesday evening, not Thursday, we will have to reschedule.

To say she got a little miffed would be an understatement. And I really know better, I have learned the hard way, never say “Let’s meet tomorrow.” Instead say “Let’s meet tomorrow, Wednesday, April 17”. I just forgot, and of course, it bit me in the a__.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 27
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 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 28
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 4/19/2018 8:47:13 AM
Usually I try to schedule a date at least two days in advance.

However, I think it's good to be ready when an opportunity presents itself - I think it's good if you can make a same-day date once in awhile. This shows flexibility, which is an important trait.

A few years back I was at a resturant texting a lady and she was at a party, and I suggested she meet me at the restaurant now, and she did.
 nyx1980
Joined: 3/17/2018
Msg: 29
Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 4/20/2018 4:33:14 AM
Depends if im bored to be totally honest
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 30
Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 4/21/2018 5:50:52 PM
I feel you nyx, same here. If I'm completely bored I'll do a last minute, but otherwise I do prefer to have some notice. I tend to reserve impromptu dates for those that I already know.

I'm learning through OLD just to accept a bunch of last minutes and treat it like speed dating, where you go through quantity.
 LucilleDixon
Joined: 12/18/2016
Msg: 31
Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 2:36:31 AM
No, never..............
 flowersinthelake
Joined: 5/11/2018
Msg: 32
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 3:17:57 AM

I always feel like last minute invites are only because their original plans fell thru and I was a second option, so no.


I don't mind short-notice dates if they aren't last-minute dates. I have to adhere to a bit of a chaotic schedule, so it'd be nice if a thoughtful date were planned with a little bit of time to prepare. This won't stop him from meeting somebody on an audition for coffee in between, of course, and I don't expect his life to revolve around my needs. However, I won't make myself too available, either.

It also depends if this is a first date or after a few dates. In rule, I don't do the last-minute/short-notice dates if I haven't established a dating pattern. Still, the dates would be to made out of consideration for our mutual availability.



1. It could be spur at the moment. Perhaps
2. They were supposed to work that day and ended up getting the day off or leaving work early.
3. They were supposed to have their kids. But ex ended up having the kids that day
4. They had been sick the previous few days. But now are feeling better.


1.Spur of the monet could mean they don't want to be alone. I won't appease the lonely looking for fill-ins to appease that.
2. But, I'm still in work.
3. I don't date men with young kids.
4.I would consider this a delay, unless they're feeling so euphoric after feeling crappy and have wonderful, new perspective out of life they just have to share. That would be fine as long as their illness isn't because his couchsurfing FWB flew in from the West Coast and sees me as an opportunity to have a chaser. Of course, I wouldn't find myself in this situation, not willingly anyway.
Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 6:27:53 AM
I've had one very short notice date. Was sitting by the water around 3:30 on a Summer afternoon. I had a message alert on my phone so I checked to see who it was. We messaged for about a half hour then she suggested we meet for a drink after she got out of work. It sounded good to me! So I took a quick drive home, showered then met her at the restaurant at 5:30. We had dinner/drinks there then went to another restaurant for dessert. We dated for a few months then off and on for a couple of years. I've also started talking to women one day then went out with them the next.

If two people are interested in each other and they have the opportunity to get together they should go for it! I don't see a need to message for 3 days then talk on the phone twice before meeting. But everyone is different.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 34
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 8:59:37 AM
I used to do it all the time. I would often get on the guest list at night clubs like First Avenue(with a plus 1) and I would ask woman on POF or O*C if the wanted to meet me there to see a band.
 JGL209
Joined: 5/1/2018
Msg: 35
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 10:27:30 AM
This one is tricky, say a woman contacts for a short notice date for dinner or drinks.. I'm thinking her cupboards are bare and she wants a free meal or booze. I'd rather make it a coffee date if anything !
 siisaa
Joined: 8/6/2017
Msg: 36
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/24/2018 10:44:31 AM
Usually not. It's pretty thoughtless of the person's time. I HAVE met up with someone very quickly before but that was because I had nothing else going on and didn't feel like staying home, although there have been more times where I opted for staying home rather than go out to meet a stranger.

In short, typically not. I don't mind a little spontaneity here and there but if it's constant thing, hitting me up last minute to hang out, then it becomes a problem. We'll cease to talk any longer.
 MizBellaDonna
Joined: 5/16/2018
Msg: 37
Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/26/2018 11:33:54 AM
Really depends on the person and my gut instinct.
I prefer a 24 hour notice myself, but I have met up on short notice before. In public place only and if it sounded like something I wanted to do anyways and enjoyed just in case the person didn't show or was nothing like their profile.

Since I am not looking for pen pals only, meeting someone is pretty much what I am here for. So it's a bit of taking a calculate risk in the safest way possible.
 somewhatJaded14U
Joined: 2/19/2015
Msg: 38
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/26/2018 6:45:27 PM
I generally like to meet quick. Its just a meet if it becomes an impromto date Great! I will message back an forth some online but I think Im getting to old to want to have to message someone who really only wants the online attention and never to meet. js
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 39
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Do you accept short notice dates with someone that you've never met online?
Posted: 5/27/2018 5:05:19 PM

This one is tricky, say a woman contacts for a short notice date for dinner or drinks.. I'm thinking her cupboards are bare and she wants a free meal or booze. I'd rather make it a coffee date if anything !

That's usually not the case when she throws out the suggestion to meet ASAP vs "standard ops" of online dating (which means chatting back-n-forth a couple days at least, setting up meeting in the near future, still talking until then some, and then meeting).

You can make the argument that if society wasn't so structured where the "guy always pays at least majority of the bill(s)", that you'd see fewer women wanting to meet so swiftly before fruitfully talking so much... but that doesn't mean they're wanting "freebies" any more than the gal's profile above her in the list. Nor does it imply the gal's going to choose guys she has a lack of interest in -- not at all. In fact, a gal's luck is going to be Better to find a match, by promoting meeting sooner VS later, compared to her female competition. In the end, most of said gals who motion meeting Sooner, don't have a 'sensitivity' to get acquainted with some comfort-zone feeling via online, first.

In short, typically not. I don't mind a little spontaneity here and there but if it's constant thing, hitting me up last minute to hang out, then it becomes a problem. We'll cease to talk any longer.

Well, it's either you're in the mood/zone that's up for a little spontaneity, or not I guess (otherwise on first suggestion, it'd be taken). Thing is though.... due to the ratio imbalance (~2.5 guys for every girl), I can't blame the guy for doing what so few gals do: Throwing it out there to meet on that first day of a few healthy exchanges VS riding it out for several days before pulling that trigger. Catching a gal to be in a certain mood with a certain opening is key. She's got plenty of dudes knocking on her door, and if she's at least relatively cute -- the guy has to assume she's got more than one other dude chit-chatting. It's a kill or be killed dating environment. ;)
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