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 Devilsfan58
Joined: 3/19/2009
Msg: 26
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Attractive Qualities Page 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
In no particular order for the bottom three.
1- Confidence
2- Compassion
3- Soft spoken
4- Great speaker or spokesperson.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 27
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/21/2018 11:27:04 PM
No, I mean, if you like someone a lot and are attracted to them and want to have sex.with them, why don't.you want to be in a relationship with them?
 Coma_White
Joined: 9/15/2013
Msg: 28
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 1:36:37 AM

What are some non-physical qualities that you find to be endearing or attractive? I was thinking of all the people I've known throughout my adulthood that were pretty average in terms of looks or body but something about them shined much brighter than those who'd turn heads just based on looks. There was one young woman in particular who had a beautiful singing voice and knew how to guitar, piano and violin. If I just saw her walking on the street, I wouldn't give her a second glance but watching her sing and play music (something she is obviously passionate about) makes her very attractive. Bubbly, engaging, approachable personalities also get me most times .


Things that could change my mind about a woman I'm on the fence about would be a woman that takes care of her health and goes to the gym, a woman that likes animals and tries to eat a vegetarian diet, a woman that's faithful and can communicate well, a woman that doesn't have a bunch of orbiter male friends and ex boyfriends around to fall back on, and a woman that is interesting to talk to.
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 8:55:30 AM

She said that I have a reputation as a player, a serial dater, and she didn’t want to deal with that. I went away, thought about that for a few minutes, and came back with an offer. You agree to date me, and we will be exclusive from this moment until we both agree that it is over, for whatever reason. An offer I have never made before in my entire life, but I was serious.

Which didn’t work, so I’ll probably never try that ploy again. I did mean it, but I’m not at all sure that she believed me.



Last week, someone labeled you a PUA and now this story.

Now it may seem like I am bashing you, but in reality, I am trying to point something out.

All of us get reputations, not just by our looks, but our actions.

So all the casual sex in the past ruined a chance (maybe) with someone you find special.

The way you wrote this story, it almost sounds as though you were trying to manipulate her.

"ploy"?

Face it friend, at our age, a leopard doesn't change his spots.

Maybe you meant well, but in all honestly, I don't think you would have ridden off into the sunset with this lovely lady you spoke of.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 30
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 10:56:40 AM

ugly_name_I_won’t_repeat
So all the casual sex in the past ruined a chance (maybe) with someone you find special.

You gotta love the forums. Where else can you go to get such diametrically opposed viewpoints?

We’ve already had one woman opine that the woman in question flat didn’t want to date me, that her decision actually had nothing to do with my reputation. And now we have a man saying it had everything to do with my reputation. Flip a coin? (smile)




Face it friend, at our age, a leopard doesn't change his spots.

Maybe you meant well, but in all honestly, I don't think you would have ridden off into the sunset with this lovely lady you spoke of.


Now here you are wrong, and I am sure of that much.


Let us first define some terms. I don’t like the word “player”, as to me it implies someone who lies or manipulates to get what he wants. I do not lie, I am very straight forward and out front. But yes, I do pursue women for purposes of sexual gratification. To some, that means “player”, so I accept that while still disagreeing.


I didn’t get married until I was 32 years old. I did a lot of dating, had a few relationships, some quite serious, many just casual. And then when I met the right one, things just fell into place. And that lasted for 27 years, mostly very good years.


As I have said before, I have never fallen in love “at first sight”, I have never became serious about any woman until after we have been intimate. For me, feelings grow over time, and most definitely do involve sex.


I have been involved, seriously involved, with 2 women over the past 8+ years since my divorce. If things had worked out, I would still be with one of them. But often things don’t work out, so you start over. And for me, it all starts with dating and then sex and then …..


With the woman that I was talking about before, where I made the offer, I have no idea if things would have worked out. I did not ask her to marry me, I asked her to give it a try. A serious try, on both of our parts. She chose not to, for whatever reason. Perhaps because she believed, as you, that I would not change. Perhaps because she just wasn’t that attracted to me as the woman here in the forums guessed earlier.

In the long run, it doesn’t matter, I gave it my best shot, and now I move on. Life is good, and hopefully will only get better!


ON EDIT:


"ploy"?


To me, the initial stages of dating are a game. If I thought of it in any other way, it would quickly drive me bonkers, and I would have to give it up. So I think of it as a game, and I think of my opening moves as a “ploy”, just as I would in a chess match.


The biggest difference? Here we have the potential for a “win-win” situation, no losers, both parties winners. Doesn’t happen often, but we do have that possibility, and it is definitely worth striving for.
 Dinno76
Joined: 3/3/2018
Msg: 31
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 11:23:09 AM
Older women want nice guys. Younger women want bad guys.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 32
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 11:29:44 AM
"if you like someone a lot and are attracted to them and want to have sex with them, why don't you want to be in a relationship with them?"

>>>you make love the fact that someone is lively b/c they are crazy, or you enjoy partying with them, or you love how they treat you, and they look good enough to have sex with or they seem so relaxed with their sexuality that they would do great things in bed....but you can see that you wouldn't be able to stand other parts of them, like how they spend money or how they treat people or that they have zero interest in hobbies you enjoy, or they would make lousy roomates or....

and yes, we do get reputations. I live and used to work in a small town...everyone had a "category". I remember one lady who hated the idea that everyone had a reputation, and once I saw the number of prismatic reflective "one day at a time" and "Crusin not usin" bumperstickers on the family taxi, I could understand why. of course, not all reps are bad. and if someone's interested in us, they don't care about our rep--I remember one coworker dating the town PUA, b/c she had dieted down and could finally land a tall dark man like him...and then got upset when she found out she was like all the other ladies, in his eyes.

it is what it is. she loved me flirting with her, b/c I flirted with all the hotties so she took it as confirmation she had reached that level. but she'd always turn me down for dates. one female coworker thought it was b/c I was always "on the make" since I flirted. others thought it wasn't. What turns one on, turns another off, depending upon what they want a relationship to do for them (or to them, I suppose).

older women may prefer good guys to nice guys, b/c they're too old for Daddy to take care of them :) But seriously it does seem, the immature young girls want the thrill of the bad boy, b/c he's just as emotional and impulsive, but as ladies mature, they want some more substance from a man, less need of the roller coaster emotions.

(he loves me, he loves me not. He loves me, he loves me not).
 Tyro327
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 33
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 3:31:35 PM
Women here really are not helping themselves out much with the what I think bit of attractive qualities means car.... lol
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 34
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 3:51:39 PM

I think bit of attractive qualities means car.... lol


Sorry Tyro, Your comment, if I read you correctly was intended to be humorous, but I'm still scratchin' my head, Huh?
 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 35
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 4:01:49 PM
Limber

Quiet

Frugal

Nurturing
 Tyro327
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 36
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/22/2018 10:39:06 PM
It was just weird I threw up another new thing in a my profile got 5 messages and I was like okay maybe a car is attractive.

In all possibility it could have been the nice weather, or the fact they were all bored and even it might have been due to it being Sunday and they don't know it's my family and it don't get messed with.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 37
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 11:39:53 AM
For me a great quality is ease of conversation. I'm a talker and I love a stimulating conversation that flows effortlessly.
 Dinno76
Joined: 3/3/2018
Msg: 38
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 12:12:18 PM
Women spend most of their younger years dating the bad guys. They get older and all of sudden they want to date the good guys. They get upset when the good guys no longer want to date them.
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 12:40:11 PM

Women spend most of their younger years dating the bad guys. They get older and all of sudden they want to date the good guys. They get upset when the good guys no longer want to date them.

Just because they don't want to date YOU doesn't mean they want to date bad guys. If you are any indication of a "good guy" I'm betting most women would be better off alone.
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 40
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 3:03:34 PM
^^^^ That was uncalled for. He didn't say that women didn't want to date him, nor did he claim to be a "good guy".

Just because YOU wouldn't date him doesn't mean that other women wouldn't date him.
 Tyro327
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 41
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 3:56:40 PM
Well Whiterose look at this way when guys start getting attacked it's always NaturalSelection for her. She thinks she is in the Stratosfere but her reality is she is just a Sphere that features an A-level cast working with B-grade material.
 Whisky_River
Joined: 10/14/2017
Msg: 42
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 4:04:57 PM
Well...Sorry guys, when a man claims women or (they) can't get dates with "nice guys"....they're(he's) wrong!
I don't know why anyone...man or woman would keep making these blanket statements.
It's not a fact....simple as that.
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 4:58:36 PM

That was uncalled for. He didn't say that women didn't want to date him, nor did he claim to be a "good guy

No, what's uncalled for is his constant complaining about women. Why else would he be here whining about women dating bad boys? My guess is because he CANT get a date so he has to come here and cry about it, then he insinuates if they do date a bad boy they will be alone the rest of their lives. In most cases they would be better off alone the rest of their life if he's whats on offer as a "goodguy" It's been my experience that most decent men who can get dates Don't go around spewing the garbage he does.



Well Whiterose look at this way when guys start getting attacked it's always NaturalSelection for her. She thinks she is in the Stratosfere but her reality is she is just a Sphere that features an A-level cast working with B-grade material.

Don't quit your day job. Oh, thats right, you don't have one.
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 44
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 5:30:58 PM

Well...Sorry guys, when a man claims women or (they) can't get dates with "nice guys"....they're(he's) wrong!
I don't know why anyone...man or woman would keep making these blanket statements.
It's not a fact....simple as that.


Agree, he should have specified "some women" rather than making a blanket statement about all women.
 Dinno76
Joined: 3/3/2018
Msg: 45
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 5:46:36 PM
Why do some women think that when men say their are some bad women that we are talking about them. Their are good and bad members of both sexes. When some women say that some men are bad we know that some are. We do not even hang out with them because we know that they are bad news. Their are some women that flock to those type of bad men though . You probably know some of them.
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 46
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/23/2018 9:42:43 PM
Maybe I misread your post, but didn't you say 'that women do this', not some women. So, if that what you posted, why wouldn't women think you are posting about them? As for messed up women, nice guys aren't looking for them or messed up men getting nice women..it would very rare for this to happened. Messed up people find messed up people, so if one keeps finding messed up people, take a good long look in the mirror. That took me forever to understand about myself, I was attracting these bad men because I was a bad women. I had to do all the hard work with a lot of therapy, before I could see daylight about myself. The work require someone to really want it, good therapy is hard work.

As for men I like would be kind but with a great sense of humor including some sarcastic wit. But I am not dating, it's just not something that will work for me at this point, my health sucks.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 47
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/24/2018 12:10:32 AM
Kind & caring.

Dinno, you would be wrong. Women that like bad boys, always like that type, that doesn't change with age.

Henry, I don't know how you get dates anymore, because I'm sure the word has spread within your group(s) that you ask many women out. Women don't typically take to men they've seen or heard do that. It may not be the only factor with that woman declining your advances, but it was one of them. I've had players in my groups hit on me, and I certainly don't take it as a compliment and would never date them.
 Tyro327
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 48
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/24/2018 2:45:02 AM

Don't quit your day job. Oh, thats right, you don't have one


Oh even better Grade B material, who is not even up with the times. Who lies on her profile and it's "that's" but so glad you brought up a diss so old Moses used it on Aaron.

You know what you and Captain Kirk have in common you both circle around Uranus looking for Klingons.
Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/24/2018 4:12:11 AM

Oh even better Grade B material, who is not even up with the times. Who lies on her profile and it's "that's" but so glad you brought up a diss so old Moses used it on Aaron.

There is just so much on my profile to lie about. I hear NASA is looking to hire a few rocket scientist's maybe you could GET A JOB there.


You know what you and Captain Kirk have in common you both circle around Uranus looking for Klingons.

Do you know what you and my cat have in common? neither one of you WORK.
 reverendswine
Joined: 4/14/2018
Msg: 50
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Attractive Qualities
Posted: 4/24/2018 6:29:02 AM
Yes, fellas. Just let your inner Wally Cleaver shine. Before you know it, a really special
girl is going to take notice and fall head over heels in love with you. Just be good little boys, dammit!!

Everything in this world happens as it should.

Women are generally impeccable choosers of men, which is why we never hear complaints about them.
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