Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 26
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?Page 2 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
Thanks for all the replies, they're pretty interesting, some made me smile not sure if they were meant to be funny but i'm glad i made this topic. I didn't know that about the limited messages @SiennaBear2 but i guess that explains why so many guys don't bother messaging and choose meet me instead.


@purplerider1200 There may be. I'm just too fed up with dating in general, to care. I was never a pushy person to begin with. Just a couple made any sort of effort, and I never had any woman actually go running after me. There must be something about me that women just don't like, and I have no idea what that would be. I'd never get a straight answer anyway. So, I'll just tend to me, and not loose any sleep over it.


Fair enough. Been sick of dating for a while myself and spend months talking to men without caring if i meet them or not any more. Most women prefer the guy to do the chasing i think it reassures them that the guy definitely does want them but I also have a reminder on my profile here that it's confident guys who do that.


@norwegianguy456 We don't always want the same type, and a gal who's non-mainstream in how she projects herself in her fashion and such is a Positive to guys in general. Normal/average/boring-fashion guys aren't looking to settle down with a future grandma next week, generally speaking. They too like girls with a little fire, aren't so mainstream... I mean think about it... you're a guy with average/boring fashion & social connections... how do you think the Typical gals he socializes with are who Match him? Even moreso that way! Give me some fire, dammit! ;)


You do talk a lot of sense. I feel like a lot of these guys have fetishised me, not sure why they do it but i'm guessing nerd media is to blame or something.


NewYorker58From OLD, I''ve used mostly pics showing I'm an outdoorsy kind of gal, because so many people list interests that they really don't do, so my hope was to attract outdoorsy men, which I've done.


PennyAnteEdit.. if you think they think you only want sex here then take down the pic of your leopard skin ass. That might help with the impression you make here. Just saying.


Both good points, pics are important in attracting certain types. I did put in my profile i want someone similar looking but nobody even bothers to read the tiny list of what i want and offer for some reason.


PennyAnteWhy guess? Send out some feelers...give him some "tells" and let him know you are attracted. If you don't get a response in kind then he's not hot for you. If I'm attracted to a guy, I let him know in short time so I don't waste time wondering.


I did used to do that but I seem to be attracted to idiots and liars when i do the chasing. There's not really anyone my type on here anyway, on fetish sites there are and i do have a lot better conversations with guys there, think that's why i don't make any effort here any more. And i don't get out much any more (for reasons i'm not going into).
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 27
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 4/30/2018 3:26:30 AM
I don't know what to expect about women who date me. There were only a few who gave it a shot, and those relationships didn't last long enough for me to get a feel of who they really were. Most were incredibly beautiful women, but it never lasts long. Which really sucks! It is like being a shipwright and making a new ship. Taking that new ship out of dock, and then watching as it sinks in 5 minutes flat. Now imagine it happens for every ship you ever made. That is my expectation, Someone who will leave as soon as they find out how incompetent I am when it comes to relationships.
 bobbyjo101
Joined: 5/13/2017
Msg: 28
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/1/2018 12:40:53 AM
I think black guys would be attracted to me because I have a big butt. Also every guy in the universe whom I'm not attracted to is probably attracted to me unless they dislike me as a person.
 BLONDE_ANGEL_1
Joined: 4/27/2018
Msg: 29
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/1/2018 5:42:18 AM
I am off the market, but over a 20 year period, the men who pursued me were Aquarians (I am not into astrology, per se) 3 out of 4 were LEFT HANDED & they all had CATS. Most were in the science field & had quirky personas, & masters degrees or PHDs. (Optics Specialist, Research Scientist, Engineer/Inventor, Chiropractor)

Also I found tall(er) (I am barely 5ft 3) men w/ DARK HAIR & DARK EYES were way more likely to pursue me, all professed a preference for blondes/light eyes/skin.

All said their fav body part on women was her derriere!

Now my age is a factor. IF I were ever single again, the men in my age range would be bald or gray/silver/white haired.

When I met my current husband, as soon as I heard he matched the usual traits of men who pursued me, I felt like I did not stand a chance against him.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 30
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/1/2018 11:17:43 AM

I feel like a lot of these guys have fetishised me, not sure why they do it but i'm guessing nerd media is to blame or something.

Some will, but with some, 'fetish' wouldn't be the word to use. Guys aren't always relationship-hunting, of course. Even when they are + single, one of the key trends is that guys don't need a gal to be "relationship fitting" in order to chase to some degree. And it's not uncommon that people will actually take a real liking to someone who's Different -- guys and gals. Gals have that 'safety barrier' in the way though (guys don't). It doesn't mean some core desire to ride off into the sunset -- it just means being Attracted. And yes, of course, there are those who are attracted more in-the-now... a dish being served in the buffet of single life that one would like to try.

Also, a gal being expressively 'alternative' -- when the guy is clearly not -- makes rejection better for him, if rejected. I know this first-hand, and noticed that about myself. When they're clearly not your type relationship-wise, you're not being rejected by the 'ideal' type of match. It plays a bigger role than one (including men themselves) think.
 2ufo
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 31
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/1/2018 2:03:03 PM

Like did you ever have any expectations of who would be into you and make contact, or you'd contact them and they'd be interested in dating. This kind of ties in with the topic about short guys because there have been some expectations of who should contact who, i'm not really interested in that either although you can discuss what you want here, i'd more like to know who you thought would contact you or even who you think should contact if you'd like to express that.


I like this question - it's something I've never given any thought to.

Who do I think would contact me? Scammers, of course. I probably fit some gullibility profile.

Usually I don't have any expectation of anyone who contacts me.
They don't have to fit into some imaginary box of my criteria. (No height, weight, income, driving, education criteria)
Then I have to judge their profile based on my previous experiences - which have not been that copious when it comes to dating.

I won't meet a man who has an obvious lie on his profile... and that's about it.

I probably won't fit well with someone who talks bad or angrily about other people.
I probably won't fit well with someone who's life revolves around video games or television.
I probably won't fit well with someone who's overly religious or political.
I probably won't fit well with someone who does illegal drugs. Illegal anything, actually.
I probably won't fit well with someone who requires constant attention.

But I'm certainly willing to meet up and, possibly, date.
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 32
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 2:41:56 AM
Thanks for the relies. I'm now seeing leagues being mentioned in another topic (this topic is like a branch off topic from other topics lol), so there are still some kind of...vague?...notions of who should be dating who and who should be approaching who.

All very interesting either way.
I like Blondes really detailed reply. Don't think many people could pin down their matches in such detail.

And it still seems people are more likely to accept being rejected from someone 'out of their league', it now explains why (on other sites) the morbidly obese women tend to get abused a lot for rejecting guys and these women do acknowledge that men think they are desperate and likely to say yes when they're not desperate at all and are cynical of a lot of mens intentions because of their attitude.

I like how people are saying who would date as well as who messages them or they expected to. Thanks.
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 33
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 5:05:16 AM

I don't know what to expect about women who date me. There were only a few who gave it a shot, and those relationships didn't last long enough for me to get a feel of who they really were. Most were incredibly beautiful women, but it never lasts long. Which really sucks! It is like being a shipwright and making a new ship. Taking that new ship out of dock, and then watching as it sinks in 5 minutes flat. Now imagine it happens for every ship you ever made. That is my expectation, Someone who will leave as soon as they find out how incompetent I am when it comes to relationships.


Your depiction is quite correct. I wish they'd be more like engines that won't start. At least they'd sit there while you work on them, and allow you to troubleshoot the problem. Not all will run, no matter what you do, so you learn after a certain amount of time to give up on it all, and go search for another. When they all won't start, it's time to find another activity that works for you.
 Canelas19
Joined: 7/17/2017
Msg: 34
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 8:19:11 AM
This happens to me too, most men that purse me are either Aquarius or Taurus, dark haired, very tall (I'm only 5'4") with meticulous eccentric personalities and loved curvy derrieres. I guess, in general, we tend to attract and be attracted to certain individuals. Like a pattern? some more specific than others, probably


I am off the market, but over a 20 year period, the men who pursued me were Aquarians (I am not into astrology, per se) 3 out of 4 were LEFT HANDED & they all had CATS. Most were in the science field & had quirky personas, & masters degrees or PHDs. (Optics Specialist, Research Scientist, Engineer/Inventor, Chiropractor)

Also I found tall(er) (I am barely 5ft 3) men w/ DARK HAIR & DARK EYES were way more likely to pursue me, all professed a preference for blondes/light eyes/skin.

All said their fav body part on women was her derriere!
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 35
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 8:30:51 AM

This happens to me too, most men that purse me are either Aquarius or Taurus, dark haired, very tall (I'm only 5'4") with meticulous eccentric personalities and loved curvy derrieres.


This describes me almost to a tee, except for the height...
 siisaa
Joined: 8/6/2017
Msg: 36
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 10:05:10 AM
Idk, but they all fall short of my expectations. In short, they're guys who I don't like.
 ChorusAurora
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 37
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 10:11:53 AM
I've no idea who would be attracted to me, it never even occurred to me to wonder...I'm only concerned with who I am attracted to >> if it's mutual, cool<<< if not, c'est la vie~
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 38
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 4:29:25 PM
I was hoping more small town guys or outdoorsy guys would message me. My old About Me talked about how I'm a small town girl who was looking for a small town boy and how I enjoyed hockey and swimming and soccer and a bunch of other things.

I don't expect a guy who contacts me to be super good-looking. Maybe an average-looking guy. I don't care if he's overweight, just that he's not obese. And I want a guy who is at least my height (I'm 5.9 and a half so a guy 5'10 or taller would be great).

I also thought that posting that I wasn't looking for anything serious, that I just wanted to date for fun might get a few hits but no. Many guys looking for marriage or sex only.
 _Rise_Above_This_
Joined: 1/14/2018
Msg: 39
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 4:37:18 PM
July as you said your dating pool is quite tiny. I did a rough check of the population in the province and there's probably about 50,000 people living within an hour of you. Your options are ridiculously few. Yes I have the time for such things.
 L_LuuLuu
Joined: 8/2/2009
Msg: 40
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/3/2018 6:38:47 PM
I expect to attract men who are around my age, at least reasonably fit, have my values and share some of my interests. I am short, so I actually prefer shorter men.

When I was looking on POF, I attracted men who only looked at the pictures. Never read my profile, Nothing in common and TALL.
I also attracted the desperate ones with nothing to offer, who are also messaging every other woman on here.

IRL I do attract the types of guys I expect to attract. But most of them are VERY tall. I can live with tall. But I can't live with nothing in common.
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 41
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 5:10:17 AM
"I wish they'd be more like engines that won't start."

>>>that would be awesome. we can make an engine start, we can't make another human think something they don't think. But for the record, this isn't like the ladies who want to "Change a man". We aren't looking initially for a "fixer upper"...but sometimes we may want to "hot rod" a partner for performance :)

"this described me to a T, except the height"

>>>And the dark hair :) you have my hair color.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 42
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 8:11:53 AM
^^^ Actually, I had dark brown hair before it started evaporating...
 MachIMustangII
Joined: 2/16/2018
Msg: 43
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 8:13:39 AM
that's what happens when you think too much. Mine was brown too and all that thinking burned the roots.
 Tyro327
Joined: 4/5/2018
Msg: 44
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 10:21:26 AM
When I think of this type of question it makes a person wonder and they have more thinking to do about the whole dating/relationship thing. So now you got another thing for married/coupled up people to throw at a person who is choosing to remain single *sigh* like the ones they had before weren't enough. So now aside from the what do you actually look for in a person? Why are you still single? Don't you get lonely? Have you tried this site or that one? You get the what type of person would you expect to be attracted to you? Your not suppose to add more questions to them we want them to stop with the stupid questions and let us live our lives.

A lot of us are looking exactly what we are looking for we don't need help as we know what we are doing, we looked at what was available there were a few minor curiosities. You live your life and enjoy it if a person comes across your path that gets your attention you investigate it otherwise just enjoy the stuff you do and have fun in life.
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 45
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 7:55:00 PM
Julystorm wrote:
My old About Me talked about how I'm a small town girl
Maybe you need to take the midnight train going anywhere.
 JGL209
Joined: 5/1/2018
Msg: 46
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/4/2018 8:04:36 PM
I thought I'd meet decent looking women with a sense of humor who care about their health and are into working out. I get the opposite. Total messes or below average women who think they're unicorns.* coughs* When I do meet someone I am looking for she either doesn't respond or she lives so far away I'm not willing to travel!
 nba24
Joined: 4/11/2013
Msg: 47
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/9/2018 11:34:29 PM
I really have no idea because ever ones definition of attractiveness is different. Some people may like facial hair some may not, some may like tall guys some may not, some may like guys with big ears some may not etc. Because ever ones definition of attractiveness you cant really say some one is like say a 9 in looks has to some one else they may be a 3 or a 5 or something. Also being a guy and so not being attractive to guys i dont really now like how i would rank my self or what kind of women would find my looks attractive. So much of looks is subjective. I see guys sometimes with women where i think that women is ugly how can you be attracted to that? A good example of that is like my best friend i would say like 90% of the time we dont agree on if a women is attractive or not. Most of the women he finds attractive i would say when it comes to looks are like a 3-4 and most of the women i would say are like a 8-10 my friend would most likely say are like a 3-4. That is just physical attractiveness to.

When people say looks dont matter they are lieing. Physical attractiveness is something that gets me interested but its ever thing else that is going to keep me interested in the women. If i mean a great looking women but we have nothing in comming or i dont like her personality then who cares at the same time i could meat some one who has a lot in common with me and who i get along with with very well but if i dont find her physical attractive at all i am only going to be able to think of her like a friend no matter what. But even none physical attractiveness not ever one is going to fell the same way. One of the hard things is finding some one who you find attractive and who fells the same way about you. I am not good at like picking up sings has i am not good with people but i find women i tend to find attractive dont fell the same way about me and the women who tend to find me attractive i tedn to find we either have nothing in common or i dont like there personality or i find them physical to be ugly. I fell like if i where to meat some one who i am attractive to and they happend to be attractive to me they would most likely be taken already any way has all the good ones are always taken and just because you are in a relationship dosnt mean you are not going to find any one else attractive of course.

It seems like on dating sits the few times i have had a women message me it is from women that are way over weight. I know i am over weight my self but i am like 20-30 over what i should be not like 100 or something and its like most the time women message me its the ones that are way over weight. I could date some one who is a little over weight has a little i dont think is that big of a deal but i just dont find women who are way over weight to be attractive at all.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 48
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/10/2018 8:10:06 AM
The weight thing though is something you have to put in perspective. There are probably twice the amount of men on here as women. And from what I've noticed, there seems to be a much higher amount of overweight or obese women on here than men, at least in their 30s which is the range I've looked at (I think the fact that at least two-thirds of the women on here in their 30s are single mothers and childbearing does seem to increase a woman's weight overall has a lot to do with it). It is to be expected that the women that will message you will be on average more overweight than you. Supply vs. demand.

I myself have been kind of surprised by the lack of overweight men online because that's generally the target I aim for. Not obese but overweight. I figure, I'm overweight but I'm into physical activity and a healthy lifestyle, so I think in my head I have a decent chance with a guy that is overweight but I don't go for a guy that's obese because he likely doesn't live a healthy lifestyle. I generally avoid guys who say they have an athletic body type because I myself don't have that and I wouldn't believe a guy would be interested in me if he had one or my confidence would be lacking in such a relationship. And online, I feel this is much more the case because in real life, my confidence is a bit better because I get the opportunity to read body language and I can see if a guy seems to be genuinely interested in me despite the extra weight. I don't think I'm bad-looking, a lot of my weight is in the bust and butt but in person a guy sees you up front and can decide from there. Online, there's a lot of guesswork involved. You can't tell how someone carries their weight from a picture plus someone might be okay with some weight but there's a dividing line and they won't know if you are above or below that until they meet you. I went on one date with a guy I met online who I really liked until I met in person and he weighed way more than what showed up in pictures. I was really nice, participated fully in the date but afterwards I messaged him and gave him the "sorry there was no spark" deal because the weight was just too much for me. I think I could date someone about 75 pounds more than me but not more than that.
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 49
view profile
History
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/10/2018 2:43:40 PM
July, you would be surprised. Rule 34 exists because of things like this.
I have heard a variety of fetishes as I strolled the internets. Some very fit men prefer big women. The reverse is also true. Some very fit women will only date fat men. The world is wondrous like that. I say give the men you want a shot. Maybe they will work out, maybe they won't. Don't let your body type dictate who you try to go out with. Let your wants and needs do that.
 julystorm7
Joined: 12/25/2017
Msg: 50
Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?
Posted: 5/10/2018 5:19:22 PM
What is Rule 34?
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Any expectations of who would be attracted to you?