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 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 26
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?Page 2 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)

(2nd comment)I love sex but that was a really strange situation.

(1st comment)As much as I enjoyed it, that was to soon for me.

Not the type of person I'd want to have a relationship with.

"
Endless Summer Nights, I don't wish to quibble with you, but from the above statements you can see why I question, your
last line. The implication is , SEX too soon ="Not the type of person I'd want to have a relationship with."

There could have been any number of reasons to not want a relationship with the woman you reference. I certainly understand that. It just seems as if the sex part was the "No deal" part, of the equation.

My choice to have sex, when I chose to have sex, never determined the outcome of a relationship. Be that, relationship" one night or 10 years. Sex did not make us or break us. What happened outside the bedroom ..............did.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 27
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/27/2018 6:09:23 PM
Pretty, That troll is a woman-hating regular under a new name. I learned the hard way, it's best to ignore them☺ This is why a lot of women don't do OLD, too many misogynists pretending (poorly) to like women. Who, but a women hater, would pick on pics of a beautiful woman?
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 28
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/27/2018 7:14:01 PM

That troll is a woman-hating regular under a new name. I learned the hard way, it's best to ignore them? This is why a lot of women don't do OLD, too many misogynists pretending (poorly) to like women.


Newyorker: agreed. I noticed that, the account was recently created. I read through some of the troll's history - disgusting and pathetic were a couple of words that initially came to mind. I agree too regarding why many women tend not to do OLD for that very reason.

On another note...

I've dated a few woman who wanted sex on the first date. It happened with one of them in the first 30 minutes of getting to her house. We didn't even get to go out. She handed me a drink, we started watching tv in her bedroom then it was on. As much as I enjoyed it, that was to soon for me. Not the type of person I'd want to have a relationship with.


Endless: I agree with what Newyorker mentioned. Some women exchange sex in hopes of a relationship or even develop feelings based on starting out with a sexual relationship. Also, some women are more liberated now. I'm in a women's group online and some of the ladies share some of their "encounters." Some are pretty forward with asking men for nudes upfront as they tell those men they want to see what to expect upfront.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 29
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/27/2018 10:05:55 PM

I’m in a women's group online and some of the ladies share some of their "encounters." Some are pretty forward with asking men for nudes upfront as they tell those men they want to see what to expect upfront.


Now that’s creepy, strange women demanding nudes pics from men. Do these women share them with their friends? No wonder we don’t trust the liberated women.
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 30
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/27/2018 11:59:44 PM

Do these women share them with their friends?


I don't know if this entire group of women are all friends. I only got added due to it being a spin-off group from the main group, but yes, some of those photos have been shared. They've even shared videos of guys...well you can use your imagination to think about what was going on.
 LucilleDixon
Joined: 12/18/2016
Msg: 31
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 1:16:01 AM

Now that’s creepy, strange women demanding nudes pics from men. Do these women share them with their friends? No wonder we don’t trust the liberated women.


You sound so ****ing stupid.
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 32
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 2:40:09 AM
^^* Does your momma know you use that language?
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 33
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 5:49:11 AM

No wonder we don’t trust the liberated women.


Perhaps the women mentioned below would be more trustworthy.

www.tv.com/shows/women-behind-bars
https://www.ranker.com/list/full-list-of-women-behind-bars.
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 6:41:58 AM

Endless Summer Nights, I don't wish to quibble with you, but from the above statements you can see why I question, your
last line. The implication is , SEX too soon ="Not the type of person I'd want to have a relationship with."

There could have been any number of reasons to not want a relationship with the woman you reference. I certainly understand that. It just seems as if the sex part was the "No deal" part, of the equation.

My choice to have sex, when I chose to have sex, never determined the outcome of a relationship. Be that, relationship" one night or 10 years. Sex did not make us or break us. What happened outside the bedroom ..............did.


I guess you had to be there. Sometimes people have extensive conversation before they meet each other. That can get to a point where they want to tear each other's clothes off before they even meet. That wasn't the case here. We texted a little for a few days, established some interests then decided to meet. I think I would have felt different if we went out for awhile then back to her house to have some fun. I kind of wonder if she just wanted sex and that was it.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 35
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 7:00:11 AM
I have only had sex with 1 guy on a first date and regretted it. My rule is no matter how much temptation or how much you think you like them or that it will be serious, just don't do it on a first date.
With guys they see sexual stuff akin to scratching their nose, doesn't really mean much. It's not going to create some sort of unbreakable bond even if you really are into the guy heaps. It's a bad idea, pointless and risky. Only do it when they have proven to you they are who you think they are, are a good person aka you still like them and proven they can be trusted.
I don't need to wait months to have sex, just as long as it takes for trust and feelings between both of us.
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 36
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 7:09:31 AM

I have only had sex with 1 guy on a first date and regretted it. My rule is no matter how much temptation or how much you think you like them or that it will be serious, just don't do it on a first date.


Sienna: I agree with you regarding establishing mutual trust and feelings based on what both people want. There's no timeline for when that happens. I have had sex after the first date once, definitely didn't plan to, but I acted on the chemistry. I don't regret the sex, but he and I were not compatible on multiple levels outside of the chemistry. He wanted to keep trying to have a relationship and I opted to cut ties to alleviate going in circles. Great guy, just not compatible. Sometimes we can wait months, think the trust is there and the outcome can be the same, so it really can turn out to be a gamble and luck.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 37
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 7:29:29 AM
The guy I actually had sex with waited till I went overseas and blocked me without a word on the exact day I left. I didn't even know till I got back in the country 10 days later. So when I had a date with the next guy I just said nah can't make the same mistake. The guy made me too nervous anyway, there wasn't much chemistry. With my now boyfriend we had a lot more chemistry and yeah more trust and he promised me we wouldn't do anything sexual on first date
 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 38
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 7:41:26 AM
What male is going to wait months??

If he has options anyway
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 39
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 8:34:25 AM
I understand what you are trying to do........... you are trying to judge compatibility before getting involved......... but that's impossible.......... you have to fall in love and be objective at the same time. Love does not work like that.

If you go into it with no feelings, you will turn them off or end up in the freinds' zone.

You just have to be smart. You have to know what true comparability is............. and most people don't. It's love (falling in love) with a compatible person.

What is compatible? - mutual love, somebody with a good attitude, sane, with not too many serious problems. That's all!!! Okay, It's simple, but not easy....... lots of people have poor attitudes......... and serious problems abound. So, it's simple but not easy. The good news is you only need one, so that's why it works.
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 8:49:16 AM

What male is going to wait months??

If he has options anyway


I dated a woman for a few months last Summer. We kissed a lot and her boobs came out a couple of times but that was it. She would hint that she wanted more, would send me nude selfies but that was it. I later figured out that she liked attention. Either from me or anyone else that would give it to her. So I guess she would keep holding the carrot (or in her case, melons) in front of my face to me interested. Besides the first person I slept with when I was 18, that was the longest I dated someone without having sex.
 prettybrwneyedone
Joined: 6/1/2017
Msg: 41
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 11:42:38 AM

I understand what you are trying to do........... you are trying to judge compatibility before getting involved......... but that's impossible...you have to fall in love and be objective at the same time. Love does not work like that.
You just have to be smart. You have to know what true comparability is............. and most people don't. It's love (falling in love) with a compatible person.

What is compatible? - mutual love, somebody with a good attitude, sane, with not too many serious problems. That's all!!! Okay, It's simple, but not easy....... lots of people have poor attitudes......... and serious problems abound. So, it's simple but not easy. The good news is you only need one, so that's why it works.


Hemingway: you're right, good point. In many ways, it's helped me in holding back in those situations and just taking enough time to see how certain situations would play out, but I do get what you're saying about trying to assess compatibility. It's one of those things that's hard to assess until you're involved with the person.

I honestly have never been in love. I've loved and kept myself open to falling, but it hasn't happened yet. And, that's true, all it takes is one - some consistency. mutual respect, a good attitude and sane are essential. Also, someone that has resolved much of their past mental and emotional issues attributed to past relationships.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 42
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 11:59:57 AM

You just have to be smart.


Bwwahahahaha..ha..ha....

As if.


somebody with a good attitude, sane, with not too many serious problems.



but that's impossible..........


Not really impossible, I'm right here.


lots of people have poor attitudes......... and serious problems abound.


Profiles on dating sites, and the forums, are proof positive of that.


The good news is you only need one,


The proverbial needle in a haystack.

The bad news is, you may never find them in that colossal haystack.
 hemingway234
Joined: 6/6/2015
Msg: 43
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 12:31:20 PM

I honestly have never been in love. I've loved and kept myself open to falling, but it hasn't happened yet. And, that's true, all it takes is one - some consistency. mutual respect, a good attitude and sane are essential. Also, someone that has resolved much of their past mental and emotional issues attributed to past relationships.


- Some women are not ready to fall in love until they are 26 - 27. Plus, you just have not met the right man yet.

You will meet a man you have unusual attraction for, and he will do and say everything right, and everything will go just right.

You are at the perfect age to start a great relationship and start having babies. Good for you, get out there and mingle!
 Qura
Joined: 8/5/2014
Msg: 44
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 1:45:30 PM
"And even when I was dating him, he made it seem like things were moving a lot slower than he was used to. "

I'm thinking that this is why you hesitated, despite the attraction--he was giving off some type of vibe that you were not compatible. I'm quite sure there is no norm, no rule, thank goodness. Trusting your gut is all that matters. Sexual freedom is also the freedom to decline.

You sound pretty self-aware, and that's great. Good luck.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 45
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 6:14:22 PM
A guy saying a relationship is not moving fast enough refers to sex. That's pathetic to say that.
 Braylen99
Joined: 4/19/2018
Msg: 46
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 7:25:44 PM
I’m not surprised why some women never have sex
 Kissfromarose77
Joined: 4/2/2018
Msg: 47
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/28/2018 8:23:03 PM
I think women still do have sex before getting to know man, if he’s good-looking enough. Of course they’ll never admit to this.
 reverendswine
Joined: 4/14/2018
Msg: 48
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/29/2018 6:07:47 AM
Sexual chemistry is a big part of the "compatibility" picture whether anyone likes it or not. The longer you put sex off for the sake of "protecting yourself", the longer the sexual compatibility goes unknown.

Let's say a couple finally goes through with it after waiting months. (as crazy as it sounds) The man discovers the woman has more hangups than he's willing to tolerate or the man is hung like a thimble. THEN WHAT??

And ladies? I hate to break it you, but if you think holding off is an effective way of filtering out the players, you're dead wrong. Let me make something crystal clear here....

If you ever meet a man, and you tell yourself to avoid him or be extra careful because you believe he's a player, guess what? He's not a player. He's a pretender. You don't know who's a player until after the damage is done. This really should be common sense.

It's all a big gamble, and the only way to protect yourself is to pull yourself out of the game completely, but how many are actually willing to do that?
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 49
What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/29/2018 7:48:10 AM

Of course they’ll never admit to this.


NEWS flash, pay attention!
Many of us women's openly admit to many things.
STOP lumping the entire female gender into one heap.
 Seki1949
Joined: 9/4/2013
Msg: 50
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What do you think the norm is for dates resulting in sex?
Posted: 4/29/2018 9:32:28 AM
I prefer to have phone sex before the first meet. I find that it breaks down a lot of barriers.
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