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Women Don't Know What They WantPage 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I think it's common to talk about our exes because the experiences with them helped us become who we are today (good or bad). Especially if it was a long relationship and if there are kids involved. Part of getting to know someone is telling "your story". I get tired of telling my story sometimes. I think I should write a book about my life then give it to potential dates. Give them a few days then see if they've left the country :)

I don't think it's good if the entire first meeting conversation is about exes. Maybe touch on a few things but there is a lot more to talk about.
 aremeself
Joined: 12/31/2008
Msg: 52
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/8/2018 11:13:04 PM
So, has anyone ever gotten what they wanted?
Or known what they wanted?
It always changes, doesn't it?

Rhetorical......
 oldwxman
Joined: 7/22/2018
Msg: 53
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/9/2018 12:24:14 AM
*So, has anyone ever gotten what they wanted?
Or known what they wanted?
It always changes, doesn't it?

How blithely circumspect. Back in the olden days, we used to call that a cop out.

The two individuals that the OP dated vomited all over him. THAT is what they wanted. Nothing more, nothing less. I'll bet they felt better for it too.
 ksuser
Joined: 7/17/2018
Msg: 54
Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/9/2018 9:01:35 AM
ComedyisLife1 "If your going to date, then leave the baggage behind".

I understand about the drama. Yet on the other side, if you want NO drama....then that just means you may be having dinner by yourself. I feel that if someone can't listen to the bad, then they don't deserve the good. I have had some things happen to me, and just needed someone to listen, not fix.
Isn't this all about, "What you really want", and to heck with what your going thru?
I usually don't share myself with someone who has no time to listen to me.
 feirene
Joined: 1/3/2017
Msg: 55
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/9/2018 9:26:34 AM

ComedyisLife1 "If your going to date, then leave the baggage behind".

I understand about the drama. Yet on the other side, if you want NO drama....then that just means you may be having dinner by yourself. I feel that if someone can't listen to the bad, then they don't deserve the good. I have had some things happen to me, and just needed someone to listen, not fix.
Isn't this all about, "What you really want", and to heck with what your going thru?
I usually don't share myself with someone who has no time to listen to me.


Completely agree.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 56
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/12/2018 8:48:23 AM
Endless Summer Nights

think I should write a book about my life then give it to potential dates. Give them a few days then see if they've left the country :)

Lol, if I did, that, for sure I'd never hear from them again.


I think it's common to talk about our exes because the experiences with them helped us become who we are today (good or bad). Especially if it was a long relationship and if there are kids involved.

This is something that I'm always not sure about. When you both have kids, I do make it a conversation topic but not if they don't. Then I avoid the topic of my kids unless they ask. And if you've both had longterm relationships that ended in recent times then it can be a good bonding point so long as you don't appear emotional about it.
 SiennaBear2
Joined: 12/2/2017
Msg: 57
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/13/2018 2:36:10 PM
I knew what I wanted, it was just finding such a man that was a whole nother mater.
 RareLiam1994
Joined: 8/12/2018
Msg: 58
Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 8:27:45 AM
Nah. Just because a woman doesn’t want you (or me) doesn’t mean they don’t know what they want. For example, it’s a given that women want a tall good looking guy with a job so when i get no replies i know it’s me that’s the issue, not them and their inabilty to gauge what they want. That said, one of the few women who talked to me just spent most the time talking about her ex. She still knows what she wants though, for me to listen to her problems and nothing more.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 59
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 10:42:26 AM
My girlfriend knew what she wanted: me,lol. She said that the 1st time she saw me her heart skipped a beat.
 Clytemnestra
Joined: 6/6/2018
Msg: 60
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 10:47:03 AM
msg#59:^^^ Sounds like atrial fibrillation to me! hahaha

J/K

;-)
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 61
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 1:22:32 PM
I think most women know what they don't want,
and when they see what they do want...they know it.
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 62
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 2:08:59 PM

I think most women know what they don't want,
and when they see what they do want...they know it.
when I was younger, I knew what I wanted and that is all that mattered. now older and wiser, I know what I don't want! I still pick my dates for what I do want, and don't want isn't always a deal breaker but carries more weight than it did in the past.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 63
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/14/2018 8:40:48 PM

Posted By: Clytemnestra on 9/14/2018 1203 PM
Subject: Women Don't Know What They Want
Message: msg#59:^^^ Sounds like atrial fibrillation to me! hahaha

J/K

;-)


Lol,I'm going to have one too after I finish this birthday cake she baked for me.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v228/fuzztone65/Mobile%20Uploads/2018-09/20180914_192912.jpg
 curvylady1965
Joined: 12/31/2017
Msg: 64
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 7:25:05 AM
CBG, that's a wonderful looking cake and it looks like 'real' icing to me. Happy birthday and may the year ahead be a positive one.

On topic, I don't have a list of physical qualities I want - I can't even think of physical aspects that make the list of what I want. It's important that someone has their finances in order and is responsible with their money because if something turns into long term, there is no way I want anything to do with a man who has a lot of debt, or who has not planned for retirement through a combination of investments and pension. But that has a lot to do with my age, never having made a lot of money so always have had to plan, save and be conservative with money, and what I'm exposed to each day at work. Height, looks, a great smile, etc. don't matter to me. Approachable, respectful in their communications with others, someone who demonstrates they want a genuine and loyal connection with me, and a genuine affection for animals would all be important to me though.
 Seahorse_Jockey
Joined: 8/24/2018
Msg: 65
Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 7:53:36 AM
"Height, looks, a great smile, etc. don't matter to me."

Does that mean you would date an unattractive looking midget?
 curvylady1965
Joined: 12/31/2017
Msg: 66
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 8:02:59 AM
Again, height, looks, a great smile don't matter to me. Attractiveness is different for every person. And as a matter of fact, I've met a very attractive dwarf that I would have dated had he been available.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 67
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 10:25:05 AM

I think most women know what they don't want,

Agreed. Asking a woman what they want, "Not YOU," will always be he quickest answer that pops into their head.


...and when they see what they do want...they know it.

Is that why they take ten minutes in the McDonald's drive thru to ponder their order, even though the menu has been mostly unchanged for the last 20 years? They have to KNOW they want a diet Coke?

Sorry about the sarcasm - but it beings up my point - selectively ignoring past experiences and memories and choosing someone / something because they "Know" it -- is a load of hooey. There are far too many people in here that cannot trust anyone or anything except their gut impulses and feelings - and a lot of that has no logic to the decision making whatsoever. That's why they have endless strings of one-and-done dates, and why they have 200 pairs of shoes hoarded under their bed. Time to take inventory of what has been lost and ignored by waiting for that next impulse to show up.
 RareLiam1994
Joined: 8/12/2018
Msg: 68
Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 11:35:02 AM
That’s a good way of putting it. “Women know what they DON’T want. The past 30 women i’ve messaged have all shown they aren’t interested in shortish, thin, ugly faced guys. Btw, is there a dating site for ugly people?
 zsuzsa62
Joined: 1/31/2016
Msg: 69
Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 12:19:55 PM
RareLiam^^^^^^^^...but you wouldn't know that those were the reasons they weren't interested in you. I suppose unless you've asked them all. Maybe it's something else in your profile? Personally, I don't mind thin guys and really, you look fine to me.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 70
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 12:31:50 PM
What are you talking about--McDonald's is constantly changing their menu. I take advantage of their mobile app now though so I can sit and decide before I go through the drivethru line.

Height is something that I just can't let go of. 80% of the men who contact me are shorter than me and every so often I think maybe height isn't so important and go for a meetup but I can't overcome how I feel.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 71
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 6:00:47 PM

I want someone bigger than me who I can feel would be able to protect me if need be.



LOL, I have never thought of A man as being my protector. It takes 2 men. Mr Smith and Mr Wesson.
 Dave of Indiana
Joined: 3/18/2009
Msg: 72
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/15/2018 7:39:06 PM
[quoteI understand about the drama. Yet on the other side, if you want NO drama....then that just means you may be having dinner by yourself. I feel that if someone can't listen to the bad, then they don't deserve the good. I have had some things happen to me, and just needed someone to listen, not fix.

Be careful how much "baggage" you unload early on. Most of us are divorced and have baggage. We all understand that the other, probably, has some emotional pain. If one unloads to much the other may feel it's not worth the emotional effort: they're just looking for someone to gripe at. If one can't stop stating all of their problems then they haven't overcome their deepest seated hurts and aren't ready for a relationship. This may sound uncaring but a new possible romance partner isn't your post divorce counselor.
 Kay9876
Joined: 7/4/2012
Msg: 73
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/16/2018 10:14:23 AM

(Msg. 71) "I have never thought of A man as being my protector." This was in response to "I want someone bigger than me who I can feel would be able to protect me if need be."

I wouldn't hesitate to call on a man to protect me, if needed. Following that line of thought, I'd want a man who always has my back, as well. Whether he's saving my life or upholding my honor, knowing he'll give it his all—even to the point of sacrificing himself—is a "must have."

Having said that, a man's size has little to do with his ability to protect. Motivation, intelligence, agility, experience, health, wisdom, and other attributes carry more weight than size. (No pun intended?)

Protecting loved ones goes both ways. Women are just as successful in protecting their children and men as men are in protecting their children and women. For me, the ability and willingness to protect is a necessary requirement for serious relationships. It’s part of the package …
 Clytemnestra
Joined: 6/6/2018
Msg: 74
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/16/2018 10:43:16 AM
^^^All this 'man as protector' rhetoric is the stuff of fairy tales. When it comes right down to it, you'd better know how to save yourself. In the end 'you' are really all you have~
 sexandthepof
Joined: 10/1/2012
Msg: 75
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Women Don't Know What They Want
Posted: 9/16/2018 12:21:05 PM
“Women don’t know what they want”,
That’s what many men think and say.
They often think most women want
Are free gifts and meals.
And many women think and say,
“All men want is
To have their d*ck in women’s pants”.
Oh my Goodness, wonder why
People can’t trust each other,
But only judge one another.
The result is to cause everybody bitter.

Deep inhale and sigh.
Or LOL.
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