I think it's different when you have kids with someone because then there's no such thing as a clean break
Making a break from someone has nothing to do with making a clean break. You are either done with them or you're not. I know a couple who have been divorced for years, they might as well still be married. They can't let each other go.
If you are really done with each other, you learn to deal with them on a different level.
And I admit to a little jealousy of his girlfriend but it has more to do with how much the kids like her
You should be glad they like her. She must be doing something right for them to think this much of her. They could have to deal with a crazy lady who feels threatened by them and is mean to them.
Plus he left me and maybe that hurts the ego.
Thank goodness someone was smart enough to end that trainwreck. Didn't sound like a healthy existence for anyone.