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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > Is dating harder for men or women?      Home login  
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 TomásIasan
Joined: 5/17/2018
Msg: 126
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Is dating harder for men or women?Page 6 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Now you would think people with some University degree would understand the difference between the real nice guy and the covert one with a nice guy syndrome who has a persona of sinister agenda. His overtop clinginess to compensate for his unattractive looks would be easily identifiable, they use kindness to make up for other stuff they lack you ladies knew that I mean with your degree and all you could tell a sincere nice guy from the other one, cause well the sincere one does blame the other guys he knows the difference.

Yeah see they plaque these forums those nice guys and they don't realize how fast their spotted, why are you blaming the bad boy for your lack of success or the confident man across the bar you don't know him. Have you talked or got to know them no you don't want too well guess what they don't talk about you as you are not worth that wasted effort why kick a man when he is down.

Human decency and manners is nice but it doesn't make you any better or than the next person chances are they do it too.

Complaining about difference in what women go for and who the don't really nice guys don't like really they don't .

Insisting women go for bad boys no actually only ones interested in bad boys and risk go for bad boys sorry to diminish that belief but it's truth. If you don't like danger your not going near the bad boy the idea a bad boy beats his women is actually a myth. That is actually someone confusing the bad guy who hates everyone, bad boy persona their risky fight to protect rarely like to fight unless the need rises they don't go out of their way to cause problems but they will finish it. They have a risk factor that is their attraction they do foolish or dangerous stuff and people are misguided as to who they really are. I know the bad boy quite well actually don't think you know someone until you really know them.

The friend-zone thing you only go there if they were never attracted to you in the first place, if you don't have the ability to accept they don't have an attraction to you and you move forward embracing that knowing and expecting that's all it will be your a fool. I can embrace it as mine actions are not sexual attraction I am curious that is a different level of attraction it's not yearning for someone it's a curious behaviour. I approach her introduce myself would like to take you out "to get to know you better" she says no thank you I rather be just friends. Great that's another way on finding out who you are and what your about that works too. With my behaviour she is not expecting happiness and positive reaction.

If a lady says yes and wants to date here is a problem men don't think about, this lady wants you and maybe wants to be with you. You realize she is not what you are looking for your going to hurt her now after you asked her out. How do you feel about that truth is you can't change how you feel right, she just has to accept it really why should she you asked her she thought you were sincere you never thought that far ahead now did you. I ask myself each time before I even ask out a woman can I do that and feel good about doing it if things are what I want them to be. Truth is I don't like woman feeling pain I caused! I actually hate it! As such I stopped dating that bothers me you might not mind telling a woman your not attracted to her that way dealing with her tears and emotions. You know what I think about my daughters when some guy might do that too them, it's not a pleasant feeling no where near enjoyable for me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2KFpvx_9stg
 oldwxman
Joined: 7/22/2018
Msg: 127
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 7:07:28 AM
*Human decency and manners is nice but it doesn't make you any better or than the next person chances are they do it too.

Disagree strongly. They don't do it too. Being depraved and debauched is the order of the day now. I was a sailor and none of my shipmates ever swore like a typical six year old nowadays. Adults are far worse. From the bloated cows that pick fights in Walmart checkout lines to the druggies that lurk behind every corner. Nice people are the minority.

More on topic... Never mind who women are drawn to or not drawn to. That should never figure into evaluating a person's character. Women, or men for that matter, who malign and slander good people in all likelihood deserve to be horse whipped. Why isn't it enough to just not have sex with good people?
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 128
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 7:49:56 AM

I have been celibate since my last divorce and the separation started in 2005.


It's time to swab out the cooch...

Just kidding...

It's commendable that you're saving it for somebody special...me!

Sorry...I'm on a roll...

All kidding aside, I respect what you're doing.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 129
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 8:09:43 AM

I had a 52 year old guy ask me out today. He said I didn't look my age, and that I look younger than he does. I met a 56 year old guy at a New Year's Eve party. I'm not looking to necessarily go out with anyone younger than me, but that's who asks me out. It's a hard life being stuck dating younger guys☺


I do agree, you don't look like 60.

I don't try to date an age group, but IMO 85% of men over 45 would choose to date much younger if much younger women were available for them to date. I base this on what I see in countries where it's common to see this. I tend to look twice if I see a couple with an older Western man a similar aged Asian woman, It's just not common to see.
 dragonbytes
Joined: 9/15/2015
Msg: 130
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 8:36:14 AM

Adults are far worse. From the bloated cows that pick fights in Walmart checkout lines to the druggies that lurk behind every corner. Nice people are the minority.


I think you watch too much internet "news", I have never seen a fight in the checkout line and druggies that luck behind every corner.

Have you seen this yourself in real life, or on TV/Internet?
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 131
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 8:48:22 AM
{I have never seen a fight in the checkout line and druggies that luck behind every corner.

Have you seen this yourself in real life, or on TV/Internet? } depends on the neighborhood. I have seen both and it is common in some areas.
 oldwxman
Joined: 7/22/2018
Msg: 132
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 9:01:40 AM
*Have you seen this yourself in real life

Yes, I have. Leaving out the Walmart fights, Americans are getting increasingly nasty and crude. I spent a few years in Canada and the difference is amazing. What is worse, they are proud to be the lowest quality and most abominable people on the planet.
 whiterose0
Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 133
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 9:37:50 AM

Yes, I have. Leaving out the Walmart fights, Americans are getting increasingly nasty and crude. I spent a few years in Canada and the difference is amazing. What is worse, they are proud to be the lowest quality and most abominable people on the planet.


Like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRtMHRGEb5I
 Clytemnestra
Joined: 6/6/2018
Msg: 134
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 9:50:31 AM
^^^Breaking news! Stop the presses!

An idiot being an idiot and he taped it!
Brilliant ! The guys a genius!
Wonder what he thinks about our foreign policy, immigration issues????
 siisaa
Joined: 8/6/2017
Msg: 135
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 11:56:26 AM

I have been celibate since my last divorce and the separation started in 2005.


Good on you! Any particular reason(s) you care to share?

I am too, although it's only been a year. I'm single & not dating anyone so there's no reason for me to be having sex.
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 136
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 12:39:29 PM
juju wrote:
I am EVEN less that attracted to a dumb man than a chubby man.
So I guess dumb and chubby is out of the question.


Kind of like the men who take pictures next to cars, houses, or other expensive toys??
Sure, that's a fair comparison.


And sorry but I am not a nun. I don't dress like one.
There is a middle ground in levels of dress. But it does beg the question of what type of a response a really attractive woman would receive here if she had pics of herself dressed as a nun.


Now if a guy is looking for a Sunday school teacher with a stripper body Good luck with that. Doubtful you will find that but YOU never know.
Actually I did see that once in a strip club. And really shapely women ARE hot dressed like a stylish librarian or SS teacher, sorry. Most men would probably agree.


In addition at 52 I get to decide what I want to wear. I had my mother tell me then my husbands now it is ME who makes these decisions. REGARDLESS of what a woman wears give NOT one soul the right to insult her. No more than I have the right to insult a man for wearing old worn clothes or 70-inch beer gut.
Respect one of the main things so few men and women have each other.
Note I'm not trying to tell you what to wear. Far from it. Actually, I have lifetime season tickets to the cleavage theme park. My hand involuntarily clicks on every cleavage themed thumbnail that I see here...so much that I'm at risk for getting Cleavage Tunnel Syndrome in my mouse hand. But...as a guy... I do believe I can express my opinion, and make suggestions about such things here. My statement was, "women should not be surprised" when they get boorish responses from men, when they dress a certain way. And I stand by that...they should not be surprised. To your point above, just as a man should not be surprised when he receives an inordinate amount of shallow, bimbo, gold diggers when he poses in pics with his mansions and Ferarris. Goes both ways.


The last thing I would do is mistreat the body I am encased in.
This makes you sound like a mummy.


Really? Why is that? I am a 50 something-year-old women who STILL have men chasing me.
Many 50-something women do, especially if they're attractive, have taken care of themselves, and appear approachable.


WRONG, boo boo A woman has to be YOUNG, hot and breathing. I haven't been young for a long damn time but I have still managed to hang on to the HOT and breathing part so you will excuse me if I am feeling pretty damn good about myself.
So, are you suggesting one has to be young to be hot? I take exception to that opinion. Hot and breathing. Not neccessarily young. Maybe not neccessarily breathing. Just hot. I'll stand by that.


I am no body's puppet. I am my own woman. I say what I think because I am the grandmother of three granddaughters who need to see a strong woman with a working mind.
Nobody puts juju in a box. I think you've made that clear.
 SS4544Spd
Joined: 8/31/2016
Msg: 137
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/16/2018 12:44:55 PM
LoveOnaSunkShip wrote:
Those types aren't worth diddly squat, no confidence in themself or respect for the woman they date.
Why would a man want to stay with a woman who always brings up all her "got a guy" options for sex?


A man who thinks that way is just plain stupid. The assumption is if a woman is attractive she must be promiscuous?
Well, "Riding the bad boy c0ck carosel" doesn't suggest promiscuity; it merely suggests that she may have been attracted to "bad boys." Could have been a succession of LTRs with bad boys, which of course, is not "promiscuous." It's no secret that many very attractive women are attracted to bad boys especially when they're younger. Men who aren't bad boys that find themeselves receiving interest from a really hot woman may assume the "bad boy" past, not necessarily promiscuity.


Unattractive women in my experience are more promiscuous because they overall use sex to compete.
Well, that's as controversial a statement as the one you questioned from me. Unattractive women are more promiscuous?

I had a homely librarian type all but attack me the first second we were alone and it was not on a date, it was a professional interaction. Huge turn off and potential lawsuit/jail time. No I am not into your Dewey Decimal System!She just wanted to check out your card cata-Log.

juju again:
I did not realize you were suggesting I had slept around.
Stick with your first impression. I wasn't suggesting that.

NY58 wrote:
SS45, You're talking about how things are, well, that's how things are when men choose a woman solely based on pics.
Pictures (and looks in IRL) are the first impression, no matter which way you cut it. And many men go 100% for looks only, not only for sex, but also for a trophy, to show to their friends and elevate their status with themselves. That's just the way many men are. Sure it's not right but neither are gold diggers. It's part of the dating world, and both sexes should develop strategies to avoid that type of thing.

If a hot guy -regardless of age -came on here complaining about attracting only bimbos and gold diggers, and we went to his profile and only saw bare chested pics, gold chains, "Zoolander" faces, sipping Cristal, and rapper poses in front of Ferarris, boats and mansions....What would the chorus here say?
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 138
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/17/2018 9:39:53 AM
SSM, I have never seen a man standing next to his Ferrari here or a mansion. If anyone ever sees that, let me know. I've seen them standing next to other cars, ranging from vettes to regular driving cars. Why is having a car, a basic necessity, considered something special? I've got an attractive looking red Mustang. I don't have a pic of it, nevermind posting it here.

Yeah, I'm very familiar with men getting raised self-esteem from how their gfs or wives look.
 fullmoonguy2
Joined: 6/14/2017
Msg: 139
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Posted: 8/17/2018 10:43:21 AM

I have never seen a man standing next to his Ferrari here or a mansion.


That's because those profiles last all of 2 minutes on here.

Then those guys take them down and spend the next 12 months dating the 500 women who contacted them in those first 2 minutes.
 dark_n_juju
Joined: 8/30/2017
Msg: 140
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/17/2018 11:11:28 AM

I do agree, you don't look like 60.

I hope I am doing as well as you are when I am 80.




It's commendable that you're saving it for somebody special.

Men in my age group rarely inspire the lust they wish. Most of the time the inspire the hold that penny with your knees. In fact, it isn't even an effort. At this rate, I will die a never having done it again. HELL if I had known that was the last time I was going to do it I would have taken more time and enjoyed it so much more.

Oh well, life goes on.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 141
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/17/2018 11:27:02 AM
Not true, my little non-dating friend☺ Many single men don't own a home, especially younger men. How many single men own high end expensive sportscars, besides celebrities? I don't see any well-known rappers here, and why would they be when they can meet women IRL. I've dated well-to-do men that got that way from saving and investing, where they weren't extravagant with buying things.

A shout out to the ladies here, I'd love to know if you've ever seen a man in an expensive car, priced over $100,000, that's not in a showroom or at a car show. Or a guy standing in front of a mansion, like a single family house that costs 2 mil or more.

Dragon, thank you! Why is it that these women are okay with much older men? My friend's father's wife died and he immediately started chatting up a woman in the Philippines that's 44 years old and he's 83. She is a friend of his son's wife. He did send for her and married her. I don't have to tell you how odd they look together. I'm sure she has no love for him so then what is her reason for marrying him? To get out of a Dodge, LOL. I feel sorry for those ladies that feel they have to do that.
 dark_n_juju
Joined: 8/30/2017
Msg: 142
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/17/2018 11:27:07 AM

Good on you! Any particular reason(s) you care to share?

It is really simple I decided to try out the 90-day rule. That has magically turn into a very long time. There are so many men who you don't really want a second date with so it is so easy not to sleep with them. Even more, you don't even want the first date with them so NOT sleeping with them is easy. Well if you are struggling to make it to the third date you are going to struggle even harder to get to 90 days.
Now some on here will suggest I am too damn picky, yet they are not specific as to what I am too picky about. Then there are others who suggest when women are treated badly it is their fault for not vetting the guy enough. Kind of a damn if you do and damn if you don't attitude.
I know others consider it a respect thing. I consider it a practical way to select a lifelong mate. I am divorced three times and I account it to three things. 1. My best friend from childhood was my maiden of honor at all weddings....And she won't be at the next. She is bad JUJU. I still love her but not as a maiden of honor. 2. I tend to morph into someone I don't know when I fall in love. I start liking all the things he likes. I give up my friends. I change to make him happy, except I can't keep that up for a lifetime and when I start to be who I am really am they don't like that person. They want me to be whom I was pretending to be. So I now stick to the things I like no if and or butts. I have always loved books so he better read books. I have always loved going out dancing and EXPECT him to also like to dance the night away more than once a year. 3. I had sex with them before I was married to them. So I got addicted and would change me to be with them. I have to know what I am getting addicted to before.
Believe it or not, sex is important to me very but I know what I want. And sex keeps getting in the way of that. Or I think it might be.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 143
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Posted: 8/17/2018 12:05:17 PM
Sex is a game changer. People, both men and women, can feel bonded after that. It's worth waiting to see who you're bonding yourself to.

 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 144
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/19/2018 7:11:16 PM
{I've seen them standing next to other cars, ranging from vettes to regular driving cars. Why is having a car, a basic necessity, considered something special?} a car for transportation is a basic necessity, a collector car isn't. while some may post just to brag about what they own, there are some of us where our cars are our hobbies. I felt it tacky to post a pic of any of mine but do mention that my free time is spent in the garage or at events. a Ferrari usually means he has money, not the same as being passionate about there hobby.
 Ladyinred0407
Joined: 2/6/2016
Msg: 145
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/19/2018 7:29:09 PM

To get out of a Dodge, LOL. I feel sorry for those ladies that feel they have to do that.


No need to feel sorry for me. I get IN AND OUT of my Dodge Ram everyday. It's quite normal.
 NewYorker58
Joined: 6/11/2013
Msg: 146
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Posted: 8/19/2018 9:32:02 PM
John, yeah, they probably never open the hood, but then there are guys like Jay Leno that have expensive collector and new cars. If you know Jay, he gets his hands dirty. He has a massive collection of cars, said to be approximately worth 50 mil. I don't get this channel anymore, but used to watch his show: https://www.cnbc.com/jay-lenos-garage/
 johnfromzelie
Joined: 3/8/2018
Msg: 147
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/19/2018 10:18:08 PM
jay definitely has a passion for it, his money just means he can have lots of them. most 'car guys' will walk right past the store bought toys and look at the ones built by the owners. had my van at a show last week and ironically, 3 cars over was a new Ferrari. everyone walked past his but stopped at mine. owning a Ferrari shows wealth, that isn't what its about. building, modifying or restoring an old car gives you bragging rights no amount of cash can buy. I guess my point was that (some) of the guys leaning on an old car aren't bragging about their wealth but rather their passions, hobbies and skills. then again, some are just losers posing with their $2000.00 used car thinking it is a Ferrari.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 148
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/19/2018 11:32:12 PM

It is really simple I decided to try out the 90-day rule.


Steve Harvey?
 mikeparkin2
Joined: 7/25/2016
Msg: 149
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Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/22/2018 4:39:47 PM
Definitely much harder for men.
What complicates dating is the number of men who are just after sex or married men looking for something on the side. This artificially inflates number of men looking for a date.
I lost count of women complaining to me about married men on pof.

Like most men over 60 I prefer younger women so this puts 60+ women at a disadvantage.
This again inflates number of men looking for 40-55 year old females.

I rarely get messages from people I have sent messages to then its a polite refusal/excuse.
I do get a few messages from older women I wouldn't give a second look to.
 dark_n_juju
Joined: 8/30/2017
Msg: 150
Is dating harder for men or women?
Posted: 8/22/2018 5:22:07 PM

Steve Harvey?

The one thing I agree with him on. Everything else that falls out of that man's mouth is crap.


I rarely get messages from people I have sent messages to then its a polite refusal/excuse.
I do get a few messages from older women I wouldn't give a second look to.


Try dating the ones you typically would not date. Maybe just maybe you will find the one. Just saying.
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