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 ShumbaHadzi
Joined: 9/16/2018
Msg: 26
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Even his headline is funny...



Seriously!! Seems he has an Asian fetish, too.
 Dadbod_67
Joined: 2/9/2019
Msg: 27
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Posted: 3/12/2019 8:50:35 PM
But isn't it better to be up-front and honest about what you are looking for, rather than put the generic "I'm all that and a bag of chips, ladies!" Then find out later he's really into too-skinny, Asian, independently wealthy women that are looking for passports?

I've talked a lot of women here that start out seemingly nice, but after a short while the conversation turns to how much money I make, what my home is worth, how much a work in a week, and then it's not hard to figure out how quickly that ends.

No, it isn't any kind of bitter grapes on my part, but why start out showing one set of values, then when I start digging down, a whole other set of values presents itself?
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 28
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Posted: 3/12/2019 9:03:45 PM
I agree. Lying to get others interested, is lying, who wants that?
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 29
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Posted: 3/13/2019 1:09:57 PM
Asking a guy what he does for a living and how much he works and how long he has been doing the job he's doing and if he has a house and what kind of car he drives is not often because a women is a golddigger. For me its a way to figure out how stable a guy is, whether he is a hard worker or lazy. Maybe when I was 20 and stupid and thought true love could overcome all those things won't a concern but now that I'm 35 I want to know a man has his shit together.
 Sweet_Danimal
Joined: 10/31/2015
Msg: 30
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Posted: 3/13/2019 1:22:53 PM

Asking a guy what he does for a living and how much he works and how long he has been doing the job he's doing and if he has a house and what kind of car he drives is not often because a woman is a gold digger.

But asking a woman the same thing may seem creepy or stalker-ish - right?
Guys don't need to know if a lady is stable or lazy --- riiiiight?
That is a the woman's 'right' to reveal whatever and whenever they feel like it. - No judgement allowed? (That was sarcasm)

People build relationships on truthful and trusting exchanges of information and feelings. Keep in mind, controlling the flow doesn't mean the other party will understand or respect that choice. We still retain the right to jump to our own bad conclusions, no matter what.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 31
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Posted: 3/13/2019 1:28:48 PM
I have no problem with men asking me what I do for a living and if I have a car, etc. I'm proud of what I do for a living and am not embarrassed about driving a minivan and renting. I want a guy to know I'm responsible and work hard and stuff.
 Dadbod_67
Joined: 2/9/2019
Msg: 32
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Posted: 3/13/2019 1:39:11 PM
I'm sorry if this reply gets posted twice, something is going on with my computer:

I agree with Julystorm that asking those types of questions is a good idea, I didn't explain in my reply that I'm getting these types of questions an hour into our first meeting. Questions about how much my salary is, down to the dollar. About how much I paid for my house, what it was last appraised at, how much my payments are, down to the dollar. What my car is, how much I paid for it. All this an hour after I wasn't sure she was a real person, not just some random person I've texted with, you know>

I agree that asking "Life Stability" questions is a good idea, but maybe after we've dated for a while, or are thinking about moving in together or even married, but not before dessert has even gotten to our table, lol
 am70sguy
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 33
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Posted: 3/14/2019 1:49:33 AM
I don't get the house ownership issue. Owning is overrated. Unless you know how to invest wisely or plan on living (in most) places 10 years to break even, no sense buying until you really find a place you want to be for a long long time. As long as a capacity to keep a roof over one's head and it isn't a tent, good enough for me!
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 34
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Posted: 3/14/2019 5:10:42 AM
I think it depends where you live. Where I live there are not very many longterm rentals. Most rentals are houses that are for sale and then you have to move when they get sold. Renting is also a lot more expensive here than a mortgage due to lack of rental housing. I currently live in government housing but my income is at the top of the allowable limit so I have to be careful not to work too many hours or I'll be kicked out. I pay $945 a month for rent plus utilities which is an extra $320 or more a month. A mortgage would probably be $500 less. If I make more than $4200 gross in a month (I make on average 3800 gross but that's 2300 in takehome pay after benefits, taxes and pension are taken off) I would have to find another place to live and that's pretty tough here so I would end up having to move in with family here. There are a lot of small apartments to rent here but they are too small for my family. In my locale, renting is a sign someone is not financially stable. Home ownership is the marker of responsibility and stability.
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 35
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Posted: 3/14/2019 6:30:22 AM

But asking a woman the same thing may seem creepy or stalker-ish - right?
Guys don't need to know if a lady is stable or lazy --- riiiiight?
That is a the woman's 'right' to reveal whatever and whenever they feel like it. - No judgement allowed? (That was sarcasm)


When having these conversations with guys I've met, we've always talked about what we do for work, whether or not we rent or
own a home, usually vehicles only come up to know how we'll be meeting up. I always tell people how long I've been working
at my jobs because it's been FOREVA...and why not? I don't know where you get the creepy or stalker-ish thing from, but if
you're having a conversation, at least with me, it's generally 2-way.

It's kind of important to know if someone is working, asking what they do is generally the more polite way to do it. Not cool
to just say...so do you work?

Maybe some people just aren't conversationalists and need to learn how to approach people and talk to them without being
rude or appearing creepy or stalkerish. (That wasn't sarcasm)
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 36
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Posted: 3/15/2019 4:33:02 PM
i am self sufficient-most places r as july said cheaper for mortgage than rent and even in a year might have equity so can sell- profit or rent it out for income. but to each their own. lol i am less irritated and annoyed by career lifestyle Questions than nude Picture request.. lol one i will answer the other i ignore. often just trophy seekers, or more satisfied with celluloid than a human..
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 37
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Posted: 3/16/2019 4:47:14 PM
Renting is like throwing money away if you can get a mortgage. Makes no sense whatsoever to rent. If you can buy your own place why rent? At least owning, you build your own equity. And most rentals you have maybe 600 square feet of space, shared laundry and can not paint the walls or even hang up pictures. When I find out a guy has lived in an apartment for years I wonder why he is living in such a way.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 38
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Posted: 3/16/2019 7:11:50 PM
There are plenty of people that prefer to rent because they don't want the financial ( or physical) responsibility of having to fix things.
Water heater goes out....call the landlord. Furnace acts up....call the landlord. Leaky pipe...call the landlord!!
Townhouses and Condos one doesn't even have to mow their own yard.

and I agree with Boo....
if one knows how to hold a conversation...one can easily find out these sort of things without coming off as a gold digger!!
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 39
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Posted: 3/16/2019 9:47:26 PM

There are plenty of people that prefer to rent because they don't want the financial ( or physical) responsibility of having to fix things.
Water heater goes out....call the landlord. Furnace acts up....call the landlord. Leaky pipe...call the landlord!!
Townhouses and Condos one doesn't even have to mow their own yard.



Nailed it! That's why I have always rented.



When I find out a guy has lived in an apartment for years I wonder why he is living in such a way.



You have no room to be asking such questions...


Some of us want to live a simpler life without the responsibilities of home maintenance, children, etc...
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 40
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Posted: 3/16/2019 11:47:31 PM
Renting here implies a person is either poor or in financial trouble. I am aware that in other locales, renting does not have the same connotation. And condos are owned, it is not possible to rent a condo, most condo boards do not allow owners to rent out their condos. And there are no townhouses here. The rental housing market is horrible here. I'm in government housing so I lucked out.
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 41
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Posted: 3/17/2019 1:53:00 AM

And condos are owned, it is not possible to rent a condo, most condo boards do not allow owners to rent out their condos.
You have absolutely no idea what you are talking about.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 42
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Posted: 3/17/2019 10:18:30 AM
seems if renting means throwing your money away, would indicate enough to throw away?? so ??? i personally prefer to own, however ic one maintains a home-however they do it-is no business of mine- how did a forum plenty of pervs -become a discussion of financial life choices-clearly none of us discussing make the grade on perversion xcale-except in so much Hijacked the thread and perverted the topic ...lol
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 43
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Posted: 3/17/2019 1:32:09 PM
spot4username, what do you mean regarding I don't know what I'm talking about?

There are many condos here available to buy. However, there are often strict rules regarding renting. My brother owns a condo and in his ownership agreement it says he is not allowed to rent out his unit nor allow anyone to stay within the unit for longer than ten days unless they are already listed in the ownership agreement as intended occupants. Exceptions to this are family members which he becomes the caregiver to or a spouse if he gets married or he gets a girlfriend to move in although a girlfriend does need to be allowed by the condo board. Thats pretty standard around here for condos.
 cooldog65
Joined: 6/27/2011
Msg: 44
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Posted: 3/17/2019 1:35:42 PM
Back on topic...I'm a perv renter!
 spot4username
Joined: 12/15/2015
Msg: 45
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Posted: 3/17/2019 2:51:51 PM

spot4username, what do you mean regarding I don't know what I'm talking about?

You said:


And condos are owned, it is not possible to rent a condo, most condo boards do not allow owners to rent out their condos.


A quick search in your area shows there are condos that can be rented. It is clearly not impossible.

It is like a lot of other things that you post. You make statements that apply to you but you attribute them to all men/women. You speak in absolutes. It just doesn't work that way.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 46
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Posted: 3/18/2019 1:11:33 PM
^^your user name, indeed, spot on everytime
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 47
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Posted: 3/18/2019 3:39:38 PM

Nailed it! That's why I have always rented.


Aww! But you are missing out on paying for your house twice.

It's so thrilling to figure out that you've paid MORE in property taxes, than you originally paid for your property. Why I'm well on my way paying for it for a third time. What fun! Makes a person want to punch a politician.
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