Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > This was a decent topic on the relationship forum      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 26
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forumPage 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Excellent goal on this cold and chilly morning.................thanks for the link but did you mean me?

"Any relationship where there is talk of the “upper hand”, is a relationship with control and power issues, is a relationship on a code red alert." https://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk/?s=control
 Chastirin
Joined: 10/3/2018
Msg: 27
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 12/22/2018 10:47:35 AM
^^ the member of your meetup group you mentioned, though, I guess it would be a bit awkward if you said you'd discussed her issues on a public forum and one of the members suggested this lol.

Anyway, if we find ourselves repeatedly attracting the same "type", we are the common denominator. Not a problem if we're attracting decent people. Could be a big problem if we're not.
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 28
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 12/28/2018 1:54:24 AM
It would indeed but how many people can still fin their way here anyway?

I knew one woman who had been in 3 abusive violent relationships.

It's because I meet so many people through running a social group I keep coming across the same things.
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 29
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 12/28/2018 6:22:51 AM

Aggers POF has been overtaken by dating apps nowadays, I’d recommend Tinder and Bumble if you’re not already on them?


Eh? I don't even trust Google, how can I trust a dating app like that?

No seriously, I tried them and I found it was just the same dismissive people that were on here?

No I have to agree with Chastrin, the common denominator is me. I have known it for a while now. I'm too stubborn to change. I want what I want, but never get offered it and I am holding out for possibly a miracle! I only want to click with one person and them to be the right one! Maybe now my personal barriers are too high? Need to reevaluate going into the New Year!!!
 Wrightbus71
Joined: 11/26/2017
Msg: 30
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 12/28/2018 8:37:59 AM
Would appear that me and young Aggers have something in common..apart from the coastal thing..
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 31
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 12/30/2018 4:16:33 AM

Would appear that me and young Aggers have something in common..apart from the coastal thing.


Seems so Brian?

Someone off of this site tried to tell me a lot of times, we were friends on FB, I was maybe a bit too romantic for OLD? She even mentioned it on here, something about "eyes catching over the oranges in Aldi" I was maybe a bit old fashioned in how I perceived and wanted OLD to work. TBH, I am! I have never, ever, been truly at comfort with it from a morality point of view. I think it is quite an insanitary way to meet people, I believe it smacks of a bit of desperation.

However as others say it is only one string to the bow in finding love!

But here is how I find it complicated. If I am meeting over a 1,000 people a week, through work and leisure in the real world and still cannot find someone and OLD is not working, what do you do?

It gives me the answers to my questions straightaway:-

Obviously, not the Hot Ticket as mentioned.
I obviously lack social skills, which is weird, seeing as what I do for a living?
I don't exude any "availability" in my body language. Obviously I have a very closed demeanour about my person.
Or
I really truthfully do not like anyone I meet and/or find online. Which is strange because I have always seen "the good" in everybody in the past? To be true, I probably really only like a few people I have any real interaction with, everyone else I can do without. Which is quite sad that it has got that way.

Jeez, I have become a really Grumpy old Man.
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 32
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 1/2/2019 7:54:58 AM
Was bored so I just did my usual search on my laptop, rather than on my phone app.

Female, Age 47 to 56, Any Intent, Any Body Type, Any Education, Any Ethnicity, United Kingdom, Anything, City Bridlington,
Postal Code YO16 ***, 25 miles, Sort Last Visit.

The results are shocking, in my opinion!!!

Showing 10 of 43

Online Now : 3
Online Today : 4 (3+4 =7)
Online this Week : 11 (3+4+11 =18)

I have no other filters set on Advanced Search (don't think so anyway) and also search for People without photos. After the 18 "active status'" the other 25 have no status information on their profile, so I would suggest that their profile is dead/inactive.

My point is this. That search includes Bridlington, Filey, Scarborough, Whitby, Driffield, Beverley, Hornsea, all of the Yorkshire Wolds heading towards York itself and a lot of the North of the Kingston upon Hull conurbation area.

If I up the mileage to 50, I start getting South Yorkshire, North Lincolnshire and West Yorkshire, which are all too far-ish, but not impossible. To do individual searches for York and Hull, I put in a relative Post-code. But for the purposes of this thread I just want to point out as it is where I live!

Where are the women looking to date in my area? I never realised it was this bad. I am also aware that in the past I have said it is the same old people, I'm not interested in, but this gives me a little more of an insight into it. This site has become more rubbish.

I am even more disillusioned!!!! No wonder I am not getting anywhere if this is my typical pond???
 Chastirin
Joined: 10/3/2018
Msg: 33
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 1/2/2019 12:30:23 PM
Mid convo and I've been logged out of the app and can't log in to the website. Oh well...

Aggers, that doesn't surprise me going by what I've heard from up your way. There's been a flurry of new men down here - no idea on the women though of course.
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 34
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 1/3/2019 1:34:33 AM
Different experience down here in Gloucestershire - loads of talented females.

I checked your locale Aggers and can see what you mean. As the search engine in Pof is well known to be on the poor side, I wonder if changing your location to an inland one would give better results?
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 35
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 3/3/2019 7:16:01 PM

I wonder if changing your location to an inland one would give better results?


TBH Chaps, I have really tried everything over my 10 years on here. I have driven miles and miles, over a 180 there and then back on a regular basis for over a year, every weekend. Put the shoe leather and tyre wear in! I've really exhausted all my patience on finding love.

However I am still prepared to put in the shoe leather and tyre wear and will go to any of the Four Corners to find her? She does not even need to travel, as I will do all that in the puisuit of happiness. It is bloody finding her, that is the problem?
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 36
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 3/4/2019 4:23:17 AM
One of my friends did just that in the search for his perfect partner, drove all over the country. It was part of his job anyway but he had no reason to stay where he was so why not. Eventually found her in the same village. That's life.
 Aggers
Joined: 10/26/2012
Msg: 37
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 3/11/2019 3:23:36 PM
I re-iterate here in Bridlington. There are now only 14, Live profiles, Online Now/Today/This Week/within 30 days, Aged 47-55 and within 25 miles? This includes North Hull, all of the Wolds towards York, Stamford Bridge, Driffield, Beverly, Filey, Whitby and Scarborough.

I have taken the rough with the smooth over the last 10 years, but WTF?

This is like the Argos Catalogue having just One page of stock. It is no wonder I sit here and shake my head?

OKC has exactly the same people and results! Ourtime is useless. Smooch, Badoo and Match, I might as well be on here (same people and results)

Jeez I would be better in Orkney, The Faroes or Shetland?? Actually I bet there is more choice there!


What is happening on this site?
 mikeparkin2
Joined: 7/25/2016
Msg: 38
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 3/29/2019 2:27:32 PM
Getting older makes dating more difficult.
My looks diminish.
The women my age are often well past their best and quite often their "main time" is spent with grand kids.
Some women are past the "sexual era" in their life and just want company.
For me the killer was prostate problems.
Nothing seems to work any more and the medication (to help peeing) makes it worse !
Needing to pee every hour puts a downer on most excursions.
So need a pill to get it up then a pill to make it pee !
Getting old isn't all its cracked up to be.

I quite often see a female profile and think she looks good.
Then the next picture is a little newer and you can start to see the ravages of age.
It must be a hell of a hit on a previously attractive woman to see it all disappear.
No wonder many women have confidence problems.
 Justanotherchap
Joined: 12/4/2013
Msg: 39
view profile
History
This was a decent topic on the relationship forum
Posted: 3/30/2019 3:05:05 AM
Well I understand where you're coming from :-)

or not

but really, women are not that much different in their view of us. Except they happen to be luckier in that it ieasier for them to maintain their sexual wants and desires. But the it was always the way wasn't it?

There are quite a lot of attractive women out they around our age. Get out there and meet them. Time is running out!
Show ALL Forums  > UK forums  > This was a decent topic on the relationship forum